fucking machines and goat trails

[monster666]

So, out of the blue, i get this email from an old friend, an old Dominant (in a casual way), and someone who built one of the original fucking machines. His was used in a movie called "Bizarre Devices" back in the seventies as well as on display at the Erotic Art Museum in SF for over a year.

Risia said that no one but me has ever heard of "fucking machines" and why would one need one if you have a real live body around to fuck? Actually, she may have said that "not many" but me have ever heard of them. Precision is important when one is quoting one's friends, don't you think?

Anyway, out of the blue, i hear from this man from in my past. I don't know if i want to see him again, though. My sexuality is kinda dormant right now. Kinda like goat trails in the hills, it's wandering all over the map but without any apparent destination. I'm pretty sure that this man's sexuality wouldn't be goat trail-like, you know?

Have you ever heard of a fucking machine?
Please help me prove to R that i'm right and she's wrong.

May I tell you cym, how disappointed I was after reading the title of the thread that you are not recanting a tale of a personal experience on a goat trail with a fucking machine the likes of can be found at http://www.fukingmachines.com !

Ya had me going for a second there!

 

[monster666]

I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you. I should pay attention to what I say. I won't do it again.

Here's a link just be warned it's pretty hardcore.

http://www.fukingmachines.com/menu.php

That'll teach me to read through a short thread before posting. I got mine at Google. Where'd ya get yours?

 

[juicygirl]

Wow, let me find my credit card I want one with the tit suckers too. Mmmm!!!!

 

[Desdemona]

I've heard of them before.

I can't get past the fact that this one is made from an old Kitchenaide mixer. I'd be too busy laughing to enjoy the thing!

http://www.fukingmachines.com/meetthemachines/machine_trespasser.php

 

[CarolineOh]

Re: Re:Re: Re: A hand raises in the crowd...

You...Rubyfruit...and a Sybian.

Again i find beads of sweat shooting like bullets from my skin! How do you DO that to me CarolineOh?

Blue, you are such a sweetie

 

[lilfrk]

That'll teach me to read through a short thread before posting. I got mine at Google. Where'd ya get yours?

Where'd I get my what? The link? My Man...I got no idea where he found that site. I just know he's way too interested in it for my comfort.

 

[juicygirl]

They are sort of silly, and the idea of a steel or pyrex dildo is not very attractive. Anyone ever try a sybian?

Goat trails mmmmm!!!!!

 

[SexyChele]

These machines seem to have more or less exploded recently. Fuckingmachines.com is actually pretty lame as far as products go. The better models are at spindoll.com. Of course, their top of the line model goes for $4,400+ - so if ya got extra cash to spare....


Also, Spindoll has what they call a "drildo" that looks lethal to me. It's basically a dildo that attaches like a drill bit to drill. I think some men may be looking at their tools in a whole new way....

 

[juicygirl]

Why else would these guys (certainly not all) be so fascinated by drilling babes if it didn't have something to do with their tools. The drilldo sounds pretty nasty.

 

[WriterDom]

I saw one in action on one of those download movie things. I don't think I have it anymore. I'll see if I can find someone who does.

 

[DRxBlue]

These machines seem to have more or less exploded recently.

i'm sorry....BOY did i get the wrong picture for a second there. <LOLOLOL>

What's the deal...are men really getting that intolerable? i can believe it, but is this a solution?

Desdemona got me started laughing, so by the time i got to your post SexyChele i was a goner.

i'm all in favor of women's independence in every form, but i gotta head to the lab. There must be more that technology can offer for under a grand!


(edited for stupid spelling)

 

[Desdemona]

DRxBlue, I'm glad I'm not the only one that found some of these things funny. Of course, now you've made me laugh at the mental image of exploding fucking machines.

 

[cymbidia]

Orgasming fucking machines?



Lifelike androids are next, ladies and gentlemen, androids one can have made to thier specifications. Maybe even, dare i suggest, even BDSM-inclined androids? We'd all have perfect partners then, or those of us who could afford it, anyway. (But nothing, i think, will ever quite manage to replace the perfection of two hearts, wholly human hearts, racing toward exquisite completion...simultaneously.)

This is the kinda stuff SciFi writers 25 hypothosized about, the kinda stuff everyone knew was so far in the future as to be, for all intents and purposes, impossible.

It's still impossible but not quite so impossibly far away now.

Technology is so cool.

 

[RisiaSkye]

I've looked at a few of these sites, and I've read other people's comments.

Suffice it to say, none of this has made me even slightly more likely to find these things sexually interesting. Scary? Sure. An inordinate waste of electronics skill? You betcha. But sexy? Not a bit, thanks.

I guess on this one, I am meant to stay sheltered.

 

[juicygirl]

Kind of ridiculous in their way these machines, but pretty funny as well. The only freaky thing I like about them is the sort of cold clinical thing. Now ducklips plus dildo, that would be really freaky.

 

[monster666]

These machines seem to have more or less exploded recently. Fuckingmachines.com is actually pretty lame as far as products go. The better models are at spindoll.com. Of course, their top of the line model goes for $4,400+ - so if ya got extra cash to spare....


Also, Spindoll has what they call a "drildo" that looks lethal to me. It's basically a dildo that attaches like a drill bit to drill. I think some men may be looking at their tools in a whole new way....

Shizaam! GoooOOOOOleeee! I wunder what I kin do with this here chainsaw!

 

[Desdemona]

I'm frightened now. Actually, there was someone over on the GB who was thinking of turning a chainsaw into a vibrator for me the other day.

 

[juicygirl]

GB frightens you? What about that green monster above you? I think my slit is the right size now, so boys . . . please don't even make the suggestion.

 

[monster666]

GB frightens you? What about that green monster above you? I think my slit is the right size now, so boys . . . please don't even make the suggestion.

Are you saying that I am frightening? Sheese - one little chain-saw joke and I'm a bad monster.

 

[juicygirl]

Okay, I have my nad clippers, just hold still. lol.

 

[monster666]

Okay, I have my nad clippers, just hold still. lol.

eeeyoww! ow ow ow ow OW!

Now THAT wasn't nice! Guess I had it coming though!

 

[juicygirl]

Kiss monster.

 

[wkdclwn]

Fucking Machines. hell yes. I have a nice collection of Sybian Videos. That thing must be pure bliss and heaven to all the ladies. I need to buy one and offer free demonstrations. Take care. Later.

 

[Never]

Yes, I've heard of a [deleted] machine - only here we call him Alan, he's a TriGam.

*rimshot!*

Oh, I love my bad jokes.
Now to wonder back to the vanilla flavored section again..

 

[cymbidia]

Oh my god.
The prodigal daughter returns.
Or is that primordial?
Primeordinal?


Hi, Never.
How's tricks?
How the hell do you know about frat boys?