I'm sorry to have to tell you this.

[Mrtenant]

I got dibs on the black leather thigh high boots and the flogger collection.

 

[Garnate]

i think i need a whiskey... processing forgiveness by an emu is a novel experience.

My giant glass margarita goblets should be delivered in the next hour or so. I love frozen margaritas with the Corona bottle upside down in them, so I needed sturdy glasses. It's not whiskey, but I make one hell of a margarona. Coronarita? Either way.

 

[Garnate]

*gasps* Y-you mean that you LIED about all of this??!!! For shame and I am devastated. Titty pics in my inbox might console me.

Ssshhh no. I didn't lie and you have no proof that I did. Garnate is resting peacefully, spread over the roof of a traitor. And in his bushes. Like she wanted.

 

[Garnate]

It was the pumpkin spice, wasn't it. I tried to tell her that anything she craved that much couldn't be good.

Sir, Garnate was a basic bitch, but she wasn't quite THAT basic.

 

[Nevyn_Black]

Ssshhh no. I didn't lie and you have no proof that I did. Garnate is resting peacefully, spread over the roof of a traitor. And in his bushes. Like she wanted.

Well, shit. That sounds like there might be a story involved. How did he get her on the roof of the trailer?

 

[aussiegeekygal]

I got dibs on the black leather thigh high boots and the flogger collection.

Fuck off. They're mine

 

[Mav Unlimited]

Fuck off. They're mine

I love when you talk dirty.

 

[Acktion]

Sir, Garnate was a basic bitch, but she wasn't quite THAT basic.

It's alright. I understand how these things happen. One day, she was at yoga class and some friends talked her into summoning The Great Pumpkin with them. Soon enough, she was sneaking off into the woods, amongst the dead and dying leaves, using pumpkins as disposable bongs.

Well, I'm here to say that we will not stand by quietly and watch another bright soul be consumed by this madness. No. Today, we will form the Filthy Fuckers Against Pumpkin Spice to carry the story of Garnete to the masses. And we will know, that wherever she is, Garnete would approve of F.F.A.P.S. in her honor.

 

[Garnate]

Well, shit. That sounds like there might be a story involved. How did he get her on the roof of the trailer?

What? No. TRAITOR. Her ashes were dumped over Mar A Lago. Anywho! How are you, person I don't know?

 

[Nevyn_Black]

What? No. TRAITOR. Her ashes were dumped over Mar A Lago. Anywho! How are you, person I don't know?

Its been up and down for about 39 years 8 months.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

I love when you talk dirty.

Floggers get me filthy

 

[Garnate]

Its been up and down for about 39 years 8 months.

I suppose Garnate would find it comforting that not much has changed.

 

[Lord Pmann]

I reverse Google Image searched the emu. Fake AF. That emu is all over the good emu porn sites.

 

[Mrtenant]

Fuck off. They're mine

Only one way you're getting them, now turn around and hold still.

 

[jaF0]

except for you. She didn't really care for you,

Nobody does. Story of my non-life.

 

[Broken_paladin]

I dont think its true, I think this has all been a big fucking scam, I am almost positive I seen her sucking cock under a bridge for crack the second tuesday of last week. Everyone should send me money to hire a private investigator to check into it.

 

[Lord Pmann]

I dont think its true, I think this has all been a big fucking scam, I am almost positive I seen her sucking cock under a bridge for crack the second tuesday of last week. Everyone should send me money to hire a private investigator to check into it.

This is one hell of a post.

 

[JamesD_0117]

I found myself in a very questionable corner of the Internet and cannot keep it to myself

OMG, I think one of our birds looks like that! No wonder the male birds are making all kinds of noise!

 

[stickwork]

Shoot your shot!

Top Shelf? (Hope you're alive, ffs.)