I'm the expert (a feel good thread for everyone)

[MathGirl]

Good grief!

young studly queer thing who wore only black leather chaps below the waist.

Dear Perdita,
At the opera? Only in San Francisco.
MG

 

[TheEarl]

Re: Re: Guns

Fair point, but I am still hugely in favour of gun control to the extent where it is illegal to possess a firearm without a damned good reason, eg sporting.

Guns make it far too easy for people to kill. I hear the argument a lot that criminals will just ignore the law and get guns anyway. Criminals will ignore the laws on drugs too, but we're not considering making heroin legal are we?

Even law abiding people can have fits of rage. If a man comes home to find his wife screwing another man, killing them's a hell of a lot easier if there's a gun at hand and it lends itself easily to the impulsive action.

Criminals will get weapons no matter what. It's what the 'law-abiding people' do with them that worries me.

<Gets off soapbox>

Just on a sidenote, some of you may have heard of the travesty of justice that was the Tony Martin case. Tony Martin was a farmer who lived in a remote farmhouse. He'd been terrorised by two young men for weeks on end, with death threats and vandalism. One night they broke into his house and he fired his shotgun, killing one and wounding the other. He went to jail and was refused parole because he didn't show any remorse for his actions. The wounded burglar went to jail too, but actually got out on parole, freeing him before Martin. Apparently he showed remorse.

You want to hear the punchline? The wounded burglar (a career criminal who'd never had a job) was, until a few months ago, suing Tony Martin for loss of earnings due to his injuries. On legal aid! The case has now been droppd due to tabloid pressure, but the situation should never have come up.

I despair of humanity sometimes, I really do.

The Earl

 

[Guest]

A Night at the Opera (rather like the Marx Bros.)

Dear Perdita, At the opera? Only in San Francisco.

Yep. You should go some opening night. I always went early just to watch the crowd. There's a pair of twins in their 70's or 80's (not the cute famous ones), tall thin very white women w/yellow hair; my partner and I call them the Misses Havishams and have promised to tell each other if we ever start dressing like them. Then there are the really souped up drag queens, Mr. Chaps sorts, and I love all the men in tuxes.

Also on opening night everyone stands for the national anthem; you'd feel right at home given all the times you hear it at PacBell Park.

Perdita

 

[MathGirl]

Re: A Night at the Opera (rather like the Marx Bros.)

Also on opening night everyone stands for the national anthem; you'd feel right at home given all the times you hear it at PacBell Park.

I hope they get better singers than the Gs do. They have some real storters at the baseball games.
MG

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: A Night at the Opera (rather like the Marx Bros.)

I hope they get better singers than the Gs do.

No soloists; just the orchestra and the audience sing. You can just mouth the words of course, or wave your big foam finger.

Perdita

 

[MathGirl]

Re: Re: Re: A Night at the Opera (rather like the Marx Bros.)

No soloists; just the orchestra and the audience sing. You can just mouth the words of course, or wave your big foam finger.

And wave my Hoss hat, of course.
MG

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: Re: Re: A Night at the Opera (rather like the Marx Bros.)

And wave my Hoss hat, of course. MG

Omigod, the Hoss hat! Will you wear matching chaps? If so, I'll get a ticket.

Perdita

 

[pop_54]

Re: Young Pops

Dear, dear Pops,

You, Rumple and Gauche make me nuts with saying you're old. I am older than any of you and I am NOT old. Cut it out. I hate being called a "mature" or "older" woman. What the fuck does that mean? I am in a fine prime of my life, don't look 'old' and rarely feel mature.

Pirate man, you've got so much boy in your head (where it counts) you make Earl sound middle-aged*. This girl knows.

luv, Perdita

*sorry Earl, had to use a strong illustration.

Purdy dear sweet lady, young lady that is, yes I know I'm not old as in old, but some things that still orbit the brain with evil intent the body is a bit too mature to perform fully these days .

Oh I can still perform 'that' act OK dear, but it is sometimes all sawing and little sawdust these days plus of course half hour longer to recharge and reload the weapon, (no not .45" just a tad bigger )

Hey Purdy, fancy a bit of sawing practice

pops...........

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: Young Pops

Hey Purdy, fancy a bit of sawing practice

Pops, your sawdust is richer than most all those young power tools produce, I like 'em ripe. See you in the woodshed.

love, Purrrdy

 

[Octavian]

An expert?

I wouldn't say I was an expert but I do know quite a bit about classical music, especially opera. I can generally recognise the different composers even if I don't know the particular work. However I can't read music or play an instrument.

I am reasonably well read and usually know a little about most things. I'm not bad at using 'excel' spreadsheets, either.

The one thing I know really well is my limit for alcohol. The problem is I am invariably drunk before I reach it!

Octavian

 

[pop_54]

Re: Re: Re: Young Pops

Pops, your sawdust is richer than most all those young power tools produce, I like 'em ripe. See you in the woodshed.

love, Purrrdy

OK lover, I'll bring the saw, you bring the piece to work on, don't need to sheath the blade for safety do we

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Young Pops

OK lover, I'll bring the saw, you bring the piece to work on, don't need to sheath the blade for safety do we

No luv, I've nothing needs protecting, not even discretion.

 

[DVS]

Very impressive list, MG = )

My boyfriend says I'm an expert on "true crime" (I love reading true crime and I love forensics stuff...and amazingly the facts about it actually stick to me!)

I'm also an expert thing-finder. If something's lost, I can find it.

Ummm, my "thing" isn't lost, but you can find it, if you want. I sure won't stop you.

And, I don't think it would be a crime, either.

 

[DurtGurl]

Experteise

I have several talants. My boyfriend says I should enter the Ladys' Triathlon at the next Olympics: Holler, spit, and cuss.
DG

 

[DVS]

I have a Ruger Single Six .22 that fits my hand nicely. Looks kind of like a cowboy gun. Single action. It's great for cans, but if I ever had to defend my life, I'll take the shotgun.
Boom! Crack! Reeeoooooooooo!
MG
Ps. Dear Chickie,
I'm very safe with a gun. It's those who don't know anything about them that make me nervous.

It gives me a good feeling to see women who are into guns, and safe about it.

I have always been into guns for various reasons, but guys are more inclined to such things. But, even though I am into guns and shooting as a sport or for self defense, I would NEVER kill an innocent animal. NEVER!
Bob Whites are fine and Dr. Pepper cans, too. I don't see the need for killing Bambi and other animals. They are all so beautiful.

But, someone who is looking for trouble, taking my stuff or hurting family or friends...? I'm ready.

I have a .45 auto, .38 police special revolver, .32 auto, and an assortment of rifles and shotguns willed to me, by my father. And, I have passed a safety course and a marksman course.


OK, for special tricks I can do?
I can only do the 'Live long and prosper thing with one hand on it's own, but if I help the other along, I can hold it there. Does that count?

I have ambidextrous eyebrows. I can raise or lower into a frown either brow independently of the other. It is a great hit at parties...after people get a bit drunk. Oh, my eyelids are ambi, too, but that isn't as special. No, I can't cross my eyes.

I have double jointed hips. I can take each one out of the socket (one at a time). It doesn't hurt at all to do this.

I can wiggle my ears. I also have a detached scalp. Maybe that's why I'm 70% bald?

I can walk and talk like E.T. the extraterrestrial. Remember him? Phone home? OK, not so special?

I can sing all of the songs in the musical "Mary Poppins", word for word. "The Sound of Music", too.

I can tell you the plot of most any M*A*S*H episode within the first few minutes of the show.

I can't whistle. I never could, and I think that's special, because most people can. Right?

These are the more quarky things I can do. Don't you think this is enough crap for one person?

I could go on, if you want. But, something tells me nobody wants me to.

 

[MathGirl]

Impressed

Dear DVS,
That's truly an impressive list of unusual abilities. Especially wiggling your ears. Nobody in your household needs to rely on TV for evening entertainment.
MG
Ps. I finally saw your AV smile.
Pps. There's more? Please share with us.
Ppps. I've never seen anyone disjoint their hips, and I hope I never do.