January 2016 Challenge: See, Say, Read, Write

[butters]

k, jazz van was the last.

neither can i hear gm's read of Farewell to the Patriarch - but what an honest, touching write, so full of character and scenery but delivered with a careful hand... it's like glancing back through someone's memories.

 

[butters]

*sigh* can't soundcloud so missing listening to no.9 - Rememories of a Lover - but in my head i can hear champer's rich, evocative voice matching perfectly with this piece. sizzlin'

again i'm missing out on hearing sinny's voice fo no.10, but i have total approval for the message delivered in the write. *nods*

no.11 - soundcloud.
but the poem! there's a strength to it, delivered (i think) by both its social commentary and avoidance of the melodramatic. it reflects the strength of the homeless, surviving in circumstances i find terrifying to consider, too often overlooked.

 

[butters]

hmmn, seems my commentary's mostly about the poems as soundcloud's a no go

so, no.12, sorry to miss AH's recording but i am rewarded by the read, particularly these lines:

to taste of artesian springs and sup on hunted feasts
gather berries ripe with juice
and lay beneath dream spun skies
count the stars as we make them ours
before dawns damned light
unfurls its unspun voodoo
casting those lasting curses on delicate retinas
the scent of her lingers on me
and every breath brings tears



just lovely

 

[butters]

13, imagination allows me to hear it being voiced by trix, but the line that stands out for me above all others (and applies so very much to any e-lovers) is

Imagination breaks the seal


thank goodness for the imagination of writers

 

[butters]

no.14 anything but spring

reading this, the only voice i hear is todski's. uncompromising. some wonderful lines in a harsh piece.

on the path to broke and broken
the family heirloom


pity is like an overzealous carpenter it takes more every time
to plane the edges to find the level
the house is bending and props
well they're just a make do aren't they . . .

autumn is here
its cool crisp air makes the skin feel alive
it rains colours but the walls don't melt
and the trees don't breathe
like they do in acid dreams
Mind the screams are they mine


because that is culture to the bottom rung
sing me a song, sung by the downtrodden
and I'm sure it'll contain anything but spring
because spring is the time the world
says go fourth and multiply
where the weather smiles
and fuck smiling it hurts my face

the past is like herpes sometimes
springs up on you when you least expect it
brings with it those weeping sores

 

[butters]

15

poem only:

i like the scattered, nebulous feel to this - the fragmentation of e-personalities drifting in the ether. got caught up for a while on 'piece' v 'peace', considering its duality. the poem's like a little electronic beacon, pulsing its message over and over into the vastness of cyberspace, hoping that one day the right person will recognise it and maybe even respond with a beacon of their own.

 

[butters]

16 - Caribbean Dream

this is one i'd really have liked to listen to, to hear/see where voice took it. as a write, it has a tenuous feel about it (life's tenuous, when all's said and done) that contrasts with the very solid sound of hammering. a thought-provoking read.

 

[butters]

no.17 Femme Fatale

bloody awesome writing
stark, face-to-the-mirror-of-reality writing. good stuff!

some oxymoronic oxygen tube
leaves a breathless desert, Darling,
on the sharpest tongue in Hollywood.

not gonna quote any more, because i'd need to quote the entire piece. bam bam bam, irony, sarcasm, terror - all there in unflinching glory.

 

[butters]

no 18 - Tinder

another i'd love to have listened to. seems i'm out of luck for most of these later ones.

there's a gentled honesty to this one, whose message about without-connection-what's-the-point? is universal enough for many of us older, more mature (hah) people to recognise.

 

[butters]

19 - Worlds Away

filled with colour, texture and smell, light and its absence, these lines in particular sand out for me - their message that the day-to-day reality of their lives ges in the way of something shared in the more romantic light of distance:

Dark skies, the playful blinks of stars,
Orion’s belt a reassuring sign that earth is round.
You see it too, when you look up,
though too much light obscures our love,

 

[butters]

no.20 Ever So Gently

what a pleasure to read AND to listen to tzara's recording!

when i read it first, without sound, what struck me most and drifted on in my head beyond its ending, was that repeated phrase 'our talks turn to lips brushing ever so gently.' there's a whispery sibilance about it that lingers... a sound memory. amongst all the vivid portrayal of life, its abundance, the writer did well to create that soft rustle of thought.... *sighs*

on listening to it, i get taken in a different direction - well, let me attempt to explain that: there's less contrast in my head between the vivid and the gentled, and i think that's because tzed has that lyrical, storytelling quality to his voice that has me listening more to that than to what's happening in the poem. so i guess the surprise (and pleasure) of being able to hear a recording at last means i got more distracted

 

[butters]

21 - Black Cherry Heaven

bloody hell, Annie, that threw me for a moment - your reading of the opening lines made me do a double-take: you sounded like me! lol

glad you enjoyed the poem, thanks for the fruity reading





stuff to do, back later to continue reading/listening to you clever, lovely writers

 

[AlwaysHungry]

I'd like to respectfully propose that we start up an auxiliary thread where people may post additional readings of the challenge poems, should it strike their fancies.

 

[Trixareforkids]

I'd like to respectfully propose that we start up an auxiliary thread where people may post additional readings of the challenge poems, should it strike their fancies.

That's already being done, Tzara's adding the links to the additional readings and letting us know in this thread that they're there. Since not all of the authors have been revealed, the only way to get permission is to go through Tzara.

For any poem that the author has already been identified, you (or whomever) can ask them directly and post here or in the Let's Hear It Thread....

 

[champagne1982]

*sigh* can't soundcloud so missing listening to no.9 - Rememories of a Lover - but in my head i can hear champer's rich, evocative voice matching perfectly with this piece. sizzlin'

again i'm missing out on hearing sinny's voice fo no.10, but i have total approval for the message delivered in the write. *nods*

no.11 - soundcloud.
but the poem! there's a strength to it, delivered (i think) by both its social commentary and avoidance of the melodramatic. it reflects the strength of the homeless, surviving in circumstances i find terrifying to consider, too often overlooked.

Here you go butters. I recorded it to vocaroo so you would be able to hear it. I'm sad you can't soundcloud since those files stay as long as the account remains and vocaroos go away after 3 months or so, I think.

Without further ado: Rememories For A Lover

 

[butters]

Here you go butters. I recorded it to vocaroo so you would be able to hear it. I'm sad you can't soundcloud since those files stay as long as the account remains and vocaroos go away after 3 months or so, I think.

Without further ado: Rememories For A Lover

thankyou! that was scrumptious, just as i imagined it. your voice is very distinctive


i'll have to use my youngest's pc when i have time and listen to the others then. screen gave out on my own combination pc/monitor so i'm back on the old laptop. keeps me in contact with Harry so it does for now. soon i won't be needing that

 

[JanneE]

"Three Memory Poems" and "Black Cherry Heaven" get points for the best imagery. "Savin' Sunshine" made me smile though, I think that might be the best.

 

[AlwaysHungry]

"The Silent Mind Still Wants to Sing" has got to be written by GM. It's lovely, it has the O. Henry twist at the end, which is anticipated by the feint early on -- the reader naively thinks it's a date for sex, but it's a date for shaving. The way the word "smelling" is left hanging at the end of the first stanza is reminiscent of e e cummings, but I like it better when GM does it.

 

[AlwaysHungry]

BTW, are we getting close to the time of the outing of the authors?

 

[Tzara]

BTW, are we getting close to the time of the outing of the authors?

Yes, I'll post the names later in the week. I'm trying to get through all of the recordings first.

 

[Tzara]

I've added additional readings to this poem and to this poem.

 

[Tzara]

I've added another reading to a revised version of this poem.

 

[Tzara]

And, added another reading of this poem.

 

[legerdemer]

#31 The Silent Mind Still Wants to Sing - yep, the gm signature; gm's renderings of aged home facilities are a bit too close to the bone for me - LOL; I spent several years visiting my parents daily or weekly, and oh boy. I so don't want to go there. Even when they sound as good as in gm's poems read by Tzara.

#32 Temporal Embrace - Woo, I'm still swooning - the poem and the voice go so well together, I'll guess it was written as well as read by DesEsseintes.

#33 Hotwired - was very funny (another Mags special?), and with one minor quibble, Piscator did a great job reading it. Love the voice as well.

 

[Magnetron]

#33 Hotwired - was very funny (another Mags special?), and with one minor quibble, Piscator did a great job reading it. Love the voice as well.

I'm guessing it is Todski.

I've only got one posted in this comp and Hotweird ain't it.