Karmadog, this is your life.

[karmadog]

While I'm fully aware that misery makes for a better story, I feel that I should append the horror show that I previously reported.

Ange knows why I'm talking like that, and I'm sure that if you ask her she'll give a suitable explanation for my excess verbiage. I will refrain.

I'll also stop it.

Last Thursday (a week after my birthday), my favorite bar threw a party for me and two women who had birthdays around the same time.

Bless them, they waited until I got off work, and as soon as I walked in the door, they brought out a personalized cake with each of our names on one, while the whole bar sang 'Happy Birthday'.

I nearly wept.

We blew out the candles at the end of the song and they toasted us with ridiculous poems. I should have given mine, but I'll save it for another occasion.

As much as I appreciated your well wishes (I really, really did), and your condolences (again, really), I was deeply affected by what my friends at my local bar did for me.

But I still didn't get to spank anyone, so I'm sure this will be an unlucky year.

What did you expect all hearts and flowers from me?

If you should think of it, have a glass for them. They deserve it.

 

[Angeline]

Ange knows why I'm talking like that, and I'm sure that if you ask her she'll give a suitable explanation for my excess verbiage. I will refrain.

You've been hitting the merlot? Is that it? (I really hate it when I snort with laughter before I'm fully awake.)

And it's bad luck if you don't spank someone on your birthday? Is this like breaking a mirror?

 

[karmadog]

Actually it was a big, fat, delicious zin (Ravenswood Mendocino).

I'm not sure if it's bad luck for everyone, but I believe that a failure to spank someone on my birthday has been responsible for all of my woes.

I think I'll create a church based on that philosophy.

The Church of Spankinology?

The Assembly of Pink Tushies?



Needless to say, corporal punishment will be allowed in our Sunday school, but no attendees allowed that are under twenty-one. After all, you can bet the sacramental wine will not be grape juice. And the host will be sticky buns.

I don't know if creating such a church would increase my luck, but the tax benefits will surely decrease my stress level.

 

[The_Fool]

You've been hitting the merlot? Is that it? (I really hate it when I snort with laughter before I'm fully awake.)

And it's bad luck if you don't spank someone on your birthday? Is this like breaking a mirror?

You snorting wine again?

 

[Angeline]

Actually it was a big, fat, delicious zin (Ravenswood Mendocino).

Hah! Close enough!

 

[Angeline]

You snorting wine again?

At 7 a.m.? lol. Bite your tongue. Or smoke your pipe. Or something.