Makes me wince!

[happyparadox]

Sometimes I hear or read a phrase that makes me wince. I am not highlighting bad grammar, rather the combination of words that has me locking my knees together.

I know that most of these phrases will be gender dependent, but what are the phrases for you?

My number one is "popped her cherry".

Popping anything during sex just seems painful.

What are y'all's?

b

Anything ending or beginning with "the bitch"

 

[Vincent E]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: hiya

I like semen...

Perdita

'Nuff said.

 

[destinie21]

This isn't really about sexual vernacular but I really don't like when people use the word Ironic for things that are just annoying and not Ironic

iro·ny (basis of Ironic)
Pronunciation: 'I-r&-nE also 'I(-&)r-nE
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural -nies
Etymology: Latin ironia, from Greek eirOnia, from eirOn dissembler
Date: 1502
1 : a pretense of ignorance and of willingness to learn from another assumed in order to make the other's false conceptions conspicuous by adroit questioning -- called also Socratic irony
2 a : the use of words to express something other than and especially the opposite of the literal meaning b : a usually humorous or sardonic literary style or form characterized by irony c : an ironic expression or utterance
3 a (1) : incongruity between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result (2) : an event or result marked by such incongruity b : incongruity between a situation developed in a drama and the accompanying words or actions that is understood by the audience but not by the characters in the play -- called also dramatic irony, tragic irony








Falling down the front steps of your house is not ironic

however Slipping on a patch of ice in the middle of summer and falling down the front steps of your house into a snow bank is ironic

 

[Vincent E]

This isn't really about sexual vernacular but I really don't like when people use the word Ironic for things that are just annoying and not Ironic

How right you are. Remember that Alanis Morrisette song "Ironic?" There were no ironies in that song.

 

[Guest]

Ditto here. Dear Irony is so ill used, abused even, and to think even erotically so. Makes me teary eyed.

Perdita

 

[gauchecritic]

Falling down the front steps of your house is not ironic

however Slipping on a patch of ice in the middle of summer and falling down the front steps of your house into a snow bank is ironic

As a comedian once commented 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife isn't ironic. What would be ironic would be finding later that a spoon would have done the job just as well as a knife.

Similarly for yours destinie. Add "If you're a meteorologist and you're wearing a bathing costume"

Gauche

 

[Quasimodem]

. . . I really don't like when people use the word Ironic for things that are just annoying and not Ironic. . . .

As I recall, my Grade Six English Text Book pedantically suggested as an example of irony:

"He ruined his benefactor, how noble of him."

I still remember that example, only because I was never able to discover from where that quote was taken.

 

[lovinanalandy]

How right you are. Remember that Alanis Morrisette song "Ironic?" There were no ironies in that song.

Amen, brother. "Isn't It Ironic?" More like isn't it moronic. Now many of the millions who bought that album think irony equals bad luck and strange coincidence. Rain on your wedding day? Traffic when you're already late? Ugh. Not irony. But a song supposedly defining irony that contains no actual irony? That's ironic. (Right? Damn that rule's confusing.)

 

[Guest]

But a song supposedly defining irony that contains no actual irony? That's ironic. (Right? Damn that rule's confusing.)

No, just stupid; but you're right, it can be confusing.

 

[destinie21]

Amen, brother. "Isn't It Ironic?" More like isn't it moronic. Now many of the millions who bought that album think irony equals bad luck and strange coincidence. Rain on your wedding day? Traffic when you're already late? Ugh. Not irony. But a song supposedly defining irony that contains no actual irony? That's ironic. (Right? Damn that rule's confusing.)

To bad about that song could have been sardonic if everyone in the song had been mockingky sarcastic.

 

[Vincent E]

This could also be posted on the Favorite Lines thread, but it seems particularly felicitous here. Steve Buscemi in the movie Con Air.

"Definition of irony: a plane load of idiots singing a song made famous by a band that died in a plane crash."





Actually, I just wanted to use the word felicitous.

 

[Wicked-N-Erotic]

What are y'all's?

"Trust me"
Nothing good has ever started out with trust me
Wicked

 

[destinie21]

"Trust me"
Nothing good has ever started out with trust me
Wicked

so true

also anytime anyone starts out with no offense it's usually going to be followed by something highly offending

ditto w/ No disrespect intended

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

 

[cahab]

Falling down the front steps of your house is not ironic

however Slipping on a patch of ice in the middle of summer and falling down the front steps of your house into a snow bank is ironic

How, exactly? Surely that is just unusual, not ironic. It would only be ironic if you'd just stated how impossible it would be to do so, as it was such a lovely day, and as you are the country's foremost weather forecaster you ought to know.

 

[gauchecritic]

Now come ON. You are me Cahab. Admit it.

On the other, other subject, a line beginning with "I think you're an honest person so..." followed by invective from the speaker about the person they are addressing.

Hmm. Reminds me of someone. Can't quite think who.

Gauche

 

[Guest]

Edited to begin a new thread.

 

[destinie21]

How, exactly? Surely that is just unusual, not ironic. It would only be ironic if you'd just stated how impossible it would be to do so, as it was such a lovely day, and as you are the country's foremost weather forecaster you ought to know.

it's ironic because I've already stated it's summer. So just what in the hell is snow and ice doing in the on your front porch ? If I hadn't specified the season it wouldn't be ironic at all as it could be winter. Also I chose a season instead of a month because here it's winter in january but that's not the case everywhere

 

[cahab]

it's ironic because I've already stated it's summer. So just what in the hell is snow and ice doing in the on your front porch ? If I hadn't specified the season it wouldn't be ironic at all as it could be winter. Also I chose a season instead of a month because here it's winter in january but that's not the case everywhere

I think you are confusing ironic and odd. Apart from spoken and dramatic irony, irony is the universe being apparently deliberately and aptly perverse. Just unusual circumstances aren't ironic, they're unusual. It's the aptness that makes it ironic. Rain on your wedding day isn't ironic, unless you're a weatherman. A free ride when you've already paid isn't ironic, unless you're the minister of transport. Etcetera.

 

[Vincent E]

A man shovels all the snow and ice from the pavement in front of his house so that no passersby will slip and fall. On his way to putting the shovel away he is hit in the head by an icicle falling from the garage roof and hospitalized.

Ironic?

A ship sinks in the middle of the Pacific Ocean casting the few survivors into a lifeboat that wanders aimlessly on the high seas. There is a small store of food on board the lifeboat, but there is no water. The shipwreck surviviors die of dehydration.

Ironic?

 

[Guest]

Originally posted by Vincent E
A man shovels all the snow and ice from the pavement in front of his house so that no passersby will slip and fall. On his way to putting the shovel away he is hit in the head by an icicle falling from the garage roof and hospitalized. Ironic?
Only slightly; your example is less than a comedy of errors—not enough dynamics between the snow and ice on the pavement and the icicles from the roof. It would have been more ironic if he'd simply slipped and fallen going to put the shovel away.

A richer example: Buster Keaton has a scene where he is waiting in a parlor for the girl he fancies; she is keeping him waiting, visible in the next room entertaining another suitor. Buster is finishing a banana, perturbed at the other man's presence. He looks at the banana skin, thinks; then places it carefully on the floor where he is certain the other man will step on it. The man comes out for a moment but stops short of the peel and treats Buster dismissively and returns to the girl. Buster is flummoxed righteously and decides to take the matter in hand; without thinking he jumps up, hurries toward the other room and of course slips on the banana peel. Perfect comical visual irony.

A ship sinks in the middle of the Pacific Ocean casting the few survivors into a lifeboat that wanders aimlessly on the high seas. There is a small store of food on board the lifeboat, but there is no water. The shipwreck survivors die of dehydration. Ironic?
Yes, but doesn't matter about the food, simply that one can die of thirst at sea.

One of the most ironic lines in literature:

A horse! a horse! my kingdom for a horse! (RIII, V.iv.10)

Brief explanation: To become king, Richard III has skillfully manipulated all around him; he kills or orders the deaths of brothers, friends, a wife, and two children. Finally at the end he shouts the line above.

Perdita

Shakepeare

 

[Vincent E]

Perdita:

So you are saying that there needs to be a direct link between the primary situation (shovelling snow) and the secondary situation (getting hurt). The icicle is inapropriate because it is not a direct link between the two situations.

The dehydration on the other hand would be? (Water, water everywhere, but none to drink). The only reason I threw the food into the scenario is so that someone wouldn't say, "Yeah, but they could starve too." Sometimes I just cannot win.

 

[Guest]

Vincent: I said it was only slightly ironic because of the icicle coming out of nowhere. In rhetoric there are basic rules, or guidelines (established in antiquity that still hold pretty fast), kind of like mathematical formulas but not so precise; breaking the code simply requires practice. So if you were the guy's neighbor and said, 'Gee, isn't it ironic Dick got hit by an icicle after clearing the snow so no one would slip,' you wouldn't be kicked off the rhetoric team as fast as Alanis Morrisette, but Prof. Hihorse might snub you at the next block party.

Sometimes I just cannot win.
No, no; it's not about winning, or shouldn't be. If you're that interested get a used Rhetoric text or surf the net (search under Rhetoric, vs. Irony, at least for now, or you'll end up w/ all kinds of sophisticated flaming of AM). I recommend sites that have .edu in the url (vs. the ones that sell term papers).

Perdita

Derek Jacobi

 

[MathGirl]

Derek Jacobi

Dear Perdita,
I don't know why you are putting peoples' names in small print at the end of your posts, but the name Derek Jacoby caught my eye. I'm a big fan of the "Brother Cadfael" historical movies, and he's the one who plays Brother C. They're based on novels written by Ellis Peters, a pen name for the writer Edith ...... Parmenter??? Very well done medieval murder mysteries. You can almost smell the smoke from the fires, hoss manure, and unwashed bodies. Thank you for reminding me of them. Time to check the series out again from the library.
MG