Meeting Master for the first time?

[Titelist]

I think it's time everyone stops giving this girl the attention she is trying to get from everyone.
I am about 50/50 on this all being BS.

 

[FurryFury]

lol Rose you took the words right outta my mouth. I thought exactly the same when I read that

Actually when you don't follow the therapist's directions after a while they tell you they can't help you and push you on an associate. Which is pretty much saying, I can't help you because you are being uncooperative (slap wrist) but my group will continue to drain your insurance anyway. It can be quite traumatic to the patient. I totally see the need for it at times though.

Fury

 

[Otherkorean]

I like getting lots of opinions before making a choice I can't make choices on my own! Its a big life changing choice...how am I supposed to make it?

I am responding on the assumption that you are honest and serious. Also, this is my honest opinion. This is what I would tell my sisters to do or my closest friends.

You have a therapist. Use them. Even if they don't tell you what to decide they have the clearest idea of what you are capable of and what you need to progress towards getting better. If they think that its is unsafe to meet your master right now, TAKE THEIR ADVICE. Even if it means that your master had to cancel his flight, hotel room and car rental. Explain to him that your therapist suggests against it, that he deserves a submissive that is prepared for him.

If you don't do this, at least pull your brother to the side and say that you are going on a date with someone on a certain day to a certain place. Offer him the chance to call at different intervals, or call him a different intervals to make sure that you are safe and happy during this time.

Ask your master questions. What kind of training? Does he want you to wear certain clothes, will he order you to stand in a public place? Look up the checklists, see what items cause you to shiver happily and what cause to to shrink away in fear. Tell him about these. Decide, before asking him his opinion, what you WILL NOT DO and what you don't want to do and what you really, really want to happen.

Ok, that's all I got. I'll go back to lurking now. Be Safe!

 

[doll_parts85]

they didnt actually use the words "beyond help" those are my words...but thats what the mental health clinic made me feel like...they said I wasnt getting help there and they said I was better suited for the Day Treatment program...

 

[CutieMouse]

I like getting lots of opinions before making a choice I can't make choices on my own! Its a big life changing choice...how am I supposed to make it?

No one can make choices for you. To say otherwise is avoidance, at best. If you are facing a life changing choice, and are unable to make a decision on your own, then it probably means you are not mature enough to make the decision, and thus, should seek out the assistance of yoru therapist to learn how to make wise decisions.

As for being dropped by therapists- I have known people who have been dropped from treatment; they generally refuse to take responsibility for their actions, refuse to cooperate with the therapist, and often have a particularly difficult set of mental health issues, such as borderline personality disorder. Most therapists limit their BPD client list to one person at a time, who is willing to prove they are worth the time and attention of the therapist. So it does happen...

 

[doll_parts85]

I am responding on the assumption that you are honest and serious. Also, this is my honest opinion. This is what I would tell my sisters to do or my closest friends.

You have a therapist. Use them. Even if they don't tell you what to decide they have the clearest idea of what you are capable of and what you need to progress towards getting better. If they think that its is unsafe to meet your master right now, TAKE THEIR ADVICE. Even if it means that your master had to cancel his flight, hotel room and car rental. Explain to him that your therapist suggests against it, that he deserves a submissive that is prepared for him.

If you don't do this, at least pull your brother to the side and say that you are going on a date with someone on a certain day to a certain place. Offer him the chance to call at different intervals, or call him a different intervals to make sure that you are safe and happy during this time.

Ask your master questions. What kind of training? Does he want you to wear certain clothes, will he order you to stand in a public place? Look up the checklists, see what items cause you to shiver happily and what cause to to shrink away in fear. Tell him about these. Decide, before asking him his opinion, what you WILL NOT DO and what you don't want to do and what you really, really want to happen.

Ok, that's all I got. I'll go back to lurking now. Be Safe!

thanks, I'll check out the checklist later...if I can find it on google...

 

[minx1]

Actually when you don't follow the therapist's directions after a while they tell you they can't help you and push you on an associate. Which is pretty much saying, I can't help you because you are being uncooperative (slap wrist) but my group will continue to drain your insurance anyway. It can be quite traumatic to the patient. I totally see the need for it at times though.

Fury

Yeah sure Fury, I appreciate there are times when a therapist will refer you on....perhaps it was more the words 'you are beyond help' that I find difficult to accept coming from one, let alone four. Maybe I'm just cynical today lol

 

[doll_parts85]

No one can make choices for you. To say otherwise is avoidance, at best. If you are facing a life changing choice, and are unable to make a decision on your own, then it probably means you are not mature enough to make the decision, and thus, should seek out the assistance of yoru therapist to learn how to make wise decisions.

As for being dropped by therapists- I have known people who have been dropped from treatment; they generally refuse to take responsibility for their actions, refuse to cooperate with the therapist, and often have a particularly difficult set of mental health issues, such as borderline personality disorder. Most therapists limit their BPD client list to one person at a time, who is willing to prove they are worth the time and attention of the therapist. So it does happen...

I was just really scared of them I hated being alone in the room with them and I didn't really know what to say...I wasn't very good at expressing my panic/anxiety problems and I wasn't ready to open up about the sexual abuse...so I'd just cry all session b/c they would tell me I had to go back to school or get a job and I couldnt do that b/c I could barely leave the house to go to therapy appointments...and I'd cancel appointments a lot b/c I was throwing up from anxiety...and they'd just get tired of me and pass me on to someone else...

 

[doll_parts85]

Yeah sure Fury, I appreciate there are times when a therapist will refer you on....perhaps it was more the words 'you are beyond help' that I find difficult to accept coming from one, let alone four. Maybe I'm just cynical today lol

those were my words...the impression they gave me...when they said they couldnt help me anymore...

 

[minx1]

they didnt actually use the words "beyond help" those are my words...but thats what the mental health clinic made me feel like...they said I wasnt getting help there and they said I was better suited for the Day Treatment program...

Lol I'm too slow today....I just read this after posting my last one

I think it was the fact you put them in quotations that confused thing dp. In that case it probably wasn't that they saw you as being beyond help but that they think you would benefit more from another form of treatment

 

[doll_parts85]

Lol I'm too slow today....I just read this after posting my last one

I think it was the fact you put them in quotations that confused thing dp. In that case it probably wasn't that they saw you as being beyond help but that they think you would benefit more from another form of treatment

yeah...put me away with the old and mentally retarded people

 

[Titelist]

Guys you are all trying to help Doll Parts and it seems to me she is just trying to get your attention.

 

[doll_parts85]

Guys you are all trying to help Doll Parts and it seems to me she is just trying to get your attention.

I just wanted some advice

 

[HottieMama]

Guys you are all trying to help Doll Parts and it seems to me she is just trying to get your attention.

Yeah..i'm done. i think i'm on ignore anyway.... (Must be saying something right.)

 

[doll_parts85]

BULLSHIT! He would fly to NY to "hurt" you...BECAUSE you're not in his own community...therefore not hanging out at the same munches or play parties..and MUCH less likely to know any of his friends.

Ok..now that i have read all the responses...i will add more thoughts. You need to be in some sort of facilitated living place....NOT in a D/s relationship. Having a "Daddy," will NOT fix your problems, and i really wonder about him if he says it will. He is taking advantage of your weakness, and possibly exploiting you for his own benefit. (By weakness i mean mental and emotional, NOT submissive tendencies.)

Get help, Doll...not a bandaid that has the friggin nerve to call himself a Daddy.

I'm submissive

 

[HottieMama]

I'm submissive

No, you're a mentally ill doormat. Let's call it for what it is.

 

[Otherkorean]

yeah...put me away with the old and mentally retarded people

I think, and I could be wrong here, is that the problem is that you want to be helped but you don't want to be helped in a way that isn't quick, fun or the effort of another person on your behalf.

While the place they're suggesting to you isn't nirvana, maybe the structure of it will help you past your anxiety. Perhaps there are others with simmilar fears as you in there that you can share experiences with, to learn from. Or the place can motivate you to build your own structure in order to choose your own lifestyle, kinky or not.

Either way, you're the only one that can decide and fix this. No one else. Not your therapist, not your master. Just you.

 

[doll_parts85]

No, you're a mentally ill doormat. Let's call it for what it is.

but I like lots of the sex stuff in bdsm...

 

[HottieMama]

but I like lots of the sex stuff in bdsm...

Ummm,,,liking parts of BDSM makes you no more of a submissive, than swimming in the ocean makes you a fish.

 

[doll_parts85]

I think, and I could be wrong here, is that the problem is that you want to be helped but you don't want to be helped in a way that isn't quick, fun or the effort of another person on your behalf.

While the place they're suggesting to you isn't nirvana, maybe the structure of it will help you past your anxiety. Perhaps there are others with simmilar fears as you in there that you can share experiences with, to learn from. Or the place can motivate you to build your own structure in order to choose your own lifestyle, kinky or not.

Either way, you're the only one that can decide and fix this. No one else. Not your therapist, not your master. Just you.

yeah, I need structure. At Day Treatment, the days are planned out and the same week after week...they have groups that last an hour at a time...but a lot of the groups I have no interest in...so I'm there 6 hours and I'm pretty bored most of the time...I did like the community service group though...and the nutrition group...even though I could probably teach the nutrition group LOL and exercise groups are nice....get me sweaty hehe

 

[doll_parts85]

Ummm,,,liking parts of BDSM makes you no more of a submissive, than swimming in the ocean makes you a fish.

but I always do what I'm told?

 

[HottieMama]

but I always do what I'm told?

DOORMAT

ok..NOW i really am done. i need to pack for my move cross-country next week..not waste time on this crap.

 

[doll_parts85]

DOORMAT

ok..NOW i really am done. i need to pack for my move cross-country next week..not waste time on this crap.

you don't have to be mean I'm a person, not a doormat.

 

[Etoile]

Oh wow, this is hilarious! I have SO many things I could say, but I'm going to keep it short.

This will NOT end well. It's just a matter of time. And I suspect the time will be very short.

With that said...
*straps on her LOLlerskates and flies away in her ROFLcopter*

 

[Evil_Geoff]

The REAL training begins in real life. Not online.

Hah... the REAL training, particularly if he's looking at changing how you think about your role in the relationship, and react to his presensce and direction, has already started. The mind and heart do not need a physical presence to be shaped and molded.