Post your naughty limericks here!

[Boxlicker101]

Melissa, whose hair is so red,
Likes both men and women in bed.
She likes to suck cocks,
Or lick someone’s box,
And loves it when I give her head.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

thinking of him made her wet
close enough she could not get
into her panties she put the phone
happy pussy no longer alone
thinking its the best toy yet

 

[Rallynoangels]

I'll try one,

There once was a man named jimmy
who saw a girl was looked very pretty
they started to flirt,
he looked under her skirt.
and found out that she wasn't a lady.

 

[bronzeage]

There once was a girl named Alice
who mistook Dynamite for a phallus
They found her vagina
in South Carolina
and most of her ass in Dallas.

 

[drown]

there's new sexy limericks,
please!

and yet,
you reiterate these?

it's not clever or cute
to nick ill repute

whil'st real fuckers joust with disease.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Some call me a Chauvinist pig
Because of the things that I dig.
I cannot stop gazing
At something amazing
Like tits that are luscious and big.

 

[drown]

the daggers she threw at young nick
whilst preparing herself to hunt dick...

'yes...
i've shared with you knowledge
in high school and college

but for an adonis...

how thick!'

...
just roommates again
...

 

[Boxlicker101]

A Woman who came from Twin Cities
Preferred getting fucked 'tween her titties.
'Cuz when the guys hips
Were rubbing her nips,
It felt just as good as two clitties.

 

[butters]

sugar daddy

a young business gal from Kilbraddie
set her sights on Sir Alan, as 'Daddy'
he scowled none too sweetly
and growled at her, neatly,
"as it 'appens, luv, i am quite faddy"

 

[Boxlicker101]

I woke up and had morning wood.
I squeezed it and it felt so good.
“Too bad,” I said, “this
Goes soft when I piss,
And doesn’t get hard when it should.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

There was a lad into mah-jong
who had an enormous great shlong
leaning over to play
the tiles skittered away
spreading the pattern all wrong.

 

[caringcad]

naughty limericks thinking of marilyn jean

old and new stanzas now posted in a longer limerick saga

check out new thread as of 06-10-2011

 

[drown]

she tore at his clothes in a fever
a hunger that spread from her beaver

but,
when he was bare
and found what was there
she knew it would never relieve her

 

[chaz57]

Melissa, whose hair is so red,
Likes both men and women in bed.
She likes to suck cocks,
Or lick someone’s box,
And loves it when I give her head.

I like it

 

[UnderYourSpell]

do you know of sweet marilyn jean
she's a treat for my old man routine
so ready to kiss, she'll fuck me to bliss
she's so hot that its nearly obscene

we each met one winter at church
but circumstance kept us un-smirched
now moved to new places, we've begun to suck faces
and make love on her upholstered perch

one wonders if it is good, or smart or wise
to boast and tell of her beautiful brown eyes
as she unbuttons her shirt, and takes off her skirt
she'd cause even much younger cocks to arise

i'm quite nearer to sixty then to fifty
she's even a bit older, and that's nifty
she's got gorgeous tits, and such fine naughty bits
i'll want to be orgasmically thrifty

being patient is difficult to bear
marilyn jean is so wantonly rare
a woman of age, who's on a sex rage
if i had a stroke in mid-fuck, who'd care?

that's not a limerick

 

[chaz57]

Karen and Sandy were friends,
they would fuck almost every weekend.
One would be she, and one would be he,
and their cums would seem never to end!

1

 

[UnderYourSpell]

He met her in Trafalgar Square
she smiled said just call me Maire,
but his passion took flight
for hermaphrodite
and a good deal of bodily hair.

 

[Boxlicker101]

There was a young lady named Nicki,
Who never was overly picky
The guys used to say
At least once a day
She’d have someone in for a quickie.

 

[butters]

a front-benching parliament member
culled totty from Jan to December
but when his party got booted
he was no longer rooted
and no-one his number remembered

 

[butters]

someone finish this with a last line, ok thnx

she didn't like cum in her mouth
preferring it spattered down south
some found this a bore
and unique in a whore
.. .. ... .. .. ... .. .. .......

 

[UnderYourSpell]

she didn't like cum in her mouth
preferring it spattered down south
some found this a bore
and unique in a whore
.. .. ... .. .. ... .. .. .......

of which there are many in Louth!

 

[butters]

of which there are many in Louth!

thankyou. thanyouverymuch. *elvis impression*

 

[drown]

online, she claims hair that is red
in texas, she claims, is her bed
there's no issue at lit
that she won't whore a bit


odds are,
she's from cheyenne, instead

 

[Boxlicker101]

A fellow named Oedipus Rex
Was very confused about sex.
He lusted for mother,
And nobody other.
Which rendered his thinking complex.

 

[butters]

on checking my web-browser history
there appeared, at first glance, a small mystery:
foot and shoe fetish sites
accessed morn, noon and night -
"teenage son, my pc, delete history!"