Sexless Marriages

[NorthernCardinal]

I dont profess to be either fit or attractive but I feel your pain. It's been close to 18 monthd since my wife even looked at me in thst tone of voice.

 

[Hopeful1972]

Here to add my name to a list that I wash didn't exist

Fair point, well made.

It's no fine place to be, but it is where we are.

 

[Tweedledude]

I'd settle just for a female friend who doesn't know my other half at the moment - and see what develops. I think it's an issue here where people are seeking a quick answer. I'm not, I'm hoping to get to know someone and take things as it comes. If it turns out to be a friendship that simply gets me socialising properly again, that's a great start and there will be more to it eventually - even if it takes a while and I make several non sexual friends along the way to finding it.

I feel your pain it's the pain of so many of us

 

[Tweedledude]

I'm 66 and have over the last 45 years been to counseling and read more books than i care to count just to make sure my attitude towards this topic was not wrong. My counselor a woman basically said your a typical horny male in our society. Her exact words. Your wife is asexual and marriage counseling will be the most difficult thing you will ever do. Wife walked out on two counselors the min the topic of sex came up. So i poured myself into work. That's where i found my validation. Retirement is a whole new struggle.

Anyways two books that i read amongst the many where written by the same author. What women expect of men and what men expect of women. I remember them because he boiled it down to this. Women's nature is be validated(to feel love) via praise and expressions of gratitude and appreciation. Men's nature is be validated(to feel love) via sex. Unfortunately most women not all women don't understand this nor do they want to understand this. So we pour ourselves into work projects religion you name it looking for validation because the one person we truly want to be validated by is unable to. Sorry for the rambling on. Anyways do love discussing books. I'm seeing more and more women authors trying to help women by telling them it's okay to feel desire and be desired. That they are actually a sexual intimate creation. Maybe the next generation will be better

 

[JadedVue]

I am totally in a sexless marriage and have been pretty much for a few years! We’re out there but we are a bit like unicorns

I am a woman in her 50’s with the sex drive of an 18 yr old boy, that’s not normal I’ve been told by female friends the same age and male friends. I should be settling down for my old age with my hormones dying a slow death, but hell no!

I like the hell no attitude. I hope you are able to find someone to play with. xoxoxo

 

[Becaa57]

My marriage has been totally sexless for over 10 years now, and even before that sex was so very infrequent. Like DDBustyBrit my sex drive has not decreased and in fact increased as I've "matured"

 

[Hopeful1972]

My marriage has been totally sexless for over 10 years now, and even before that sex was so very infrequent. Like DDBustyBrit my sex drive has not decreased and in fact increased as I've "matured"

Sorry to hear that

 

[30bandits]

My marriage has been totally sexless for over 10 years now, and even before that sex was so very infrequent. Like DDBustyBrit my sex drive has not decreased and in fact increased as I've "matured"

let's change that...if you'd like.

 

[Superfungurl]

Any CO guys (719 area) whose cocks are underappreciated REALLY need to contact me! Cum over! I'll make you happy you have a cock!

 

[Johnlasting22]

Wife and I have sex but it always myself initiating and doing. I just wish it could be mutual

 

[overwatcher]

Any CO guys (719 area) whose cocks are underappreciated REALLY need to contact me! Cum over! I'll make you happy you have a cock!

That's a freaking cool thing you're offering for a group of people that deserve some TLC in their lives. Kudos to you.

 

[writerzblok92]

Going on 12 years sexless here soon and not looking forward to it. It's been so long, I've forgotten what it is like to be with a woman. I often wonder if I'll ever have sex again in my life. Not a happy prospect when you're 50 and have some life left.

 

[Hopeful1972]

A huge part of me wonders why others (both male and female) seem to get to have sex so easily, whereas it doesn't happen the same for me.

 

[Tweedledude]

A huge part of me wonders why others (both male and female) seem to get to have sex so easily, whereas it doesn't happen the same for me.

Dont you get the feeling, at least for me that popular culture and reality are two different things? Media, arts, and literature trying to convince us a particular reality whilst life is reality.

 

[Unleashthelegions]

Did you find an outlet

Not for the sexual part, but been playing magic on spelltable with people and that has been a nice social side of things.

 

[Unleashthelegions]

I'd settle just for a female friend who doesn't know my other half at the moment - and see what develops. I think it's an issue here where people are seeking a quick answer. I'm not, I'm hoping to get to know someone and take things as it comes. If it turns out to be a friendship that simply gets me socialising properly again, that's a great start and there will be more to it eventually - even if it takes a while and I make several non sexual friends along the way to finding it.

Agreed, I would happily have a friend first and then see what comes.

 

[Hopeful1972]

Dont you get the feeling, at least for me that popular culture and reality are two different things? Media, arts, and literature trying to convince us a particular reality whilst life is reality.

I was more meaning in terms of real people in my life who seem to be getting laid...

 

[Tweedledude]

Yes that part is particularly hard to deal with. That particularly is painful.

 

[Winchester3030]

My wife and I get along great in every aspect except the most important one to me!!! Sex, I don’t think she has ever even thought about having sex. She says I am her only man but I really feel like something happened to her before we met that made her non sexual! I have lots of trust issues with finding a FWB - I have had one female friend in my life since I have been married that I would trust with my life but she was no go on the sex part

 

[Tweedledude]

Sometimes humor is the only thing that helps

 

[Winchester3030]

Sometimes humor is the only thing that helps

Exactly

 

[Hopeful1972]

Yes that part is particularly hard to deal with. That particularly is painful.

Yes, indeed

 

[Tweedledude]

Ya I'm thinking it's time for another week long walk about. US style in a car

 

[Hopeful1972]

Yay!
Another Saturday night without the slightest hope of sex.

#goingmadbyhormones

 

[Britva415]

A huge part of me wonders why others (both male and female) seem to get to have sex so easily, whereas it doesn't happen the same for me.

Are you married, and talking about sex with just the one person? What's the story with fidelity for you? If the one person isn't going to do it, then you aren't going to get it if that's your only option.