The Dom Lounge

[WriterDom]

Players vs Owners

I can live without major league baseball. And I feel betrayed by both sides. And I really don't care to sit down and analyze the issues surrounding the coming strike between grown men getting paid millions by millionaires to play a kid's game. It was hard enough to go through the shit in 94 and see them sign an agreement that didn't really address the issues at hand, but pushed the problem ahead to 2002. Now here we are again, and another season is about to go up in flames. Maybe the fans will come back. But I wont.

 

[Sandia]

Lance, just a few thoughts on what you said:

"I've never...never...been so poorly treated by so many women anywhere....maybe in sum total...in my life as here.

I've thought and thought about this issue, and here's what I've come up with:

In my experience there are some people, and especially submissive women, who have issues revolving around vulnerability and control. To put it more concretely; some people feel like they have no power, and no control, in real life. They feel like victims.

This "space," then, becomes a kind of "safe place" for them, a place where they can feel like they have the control they lack in real life.

The idea of losing this safe place is terrifying to them.

But they don't have the perspective or consciousness of their own insecurities to understand what's motivating them. Instead, they lash out at perceived threats, which typically take the form of any man who comes here, posts what he thinks, from his background and experience, without understanding the nature or condition of the "community" here.

To put it differently: they perpetually see themselves as victims, regardless of how repeatedly or viciously they attack innocent third parties, or how mean-spirited and hypocritical their actions or words really are.

Example: calling you a "bully" even as the attack en masse, and do all the things that bullies always do whenever they're bullying someone.

And there's a little more to it than that. Some people have had very bad experiences with men; experiences you don't get over easily. There's a connection here between that and what's happening here, IMO.

I feel bad. I think it's wonderful for a group of intelligent thoughtful women to have a special place of their own, where they can discuss their issues in "safety."

This is not that place. This is a public forum, that claims to be for "everyone" who has an interest in BDSM. Claiming this forum is for "everyone," and then attacking every third person who comes here, in good faith, with real issues they'd like to discuss, is stupid, destructive, and, well, mean.

It's marvelous to me that people who are as intelligent and perceptive as some of the people here (usually) are, can't seem to understand this.

And it's marvelous to me they can't seem to understand how much damage they're doing - both to the "victims" of their attacks, and to the forum itself, by claiming to be one thing, while in reality trying (using the worst possible methods) to be something else.

 

[forced]

female sub sneaking in to say...

I agree with Sandia on many points.

I would also like to say that I wish there were more male doms here voicing their thoughts and opinions.

Being a straight, submissive female - and new to the scene at that! - some of the things that I'm most interested in reading about aren't going to come from the women on this board. The best shot I've had at understanding more is from other sub female POV's.

That's all fine and good, but if you're lurkin' around tryin' to get more info, it kinda sucks when all the men are hiding out, afraid of being bashed!!

sneaks back out to the "hen house"...

 

[MissTaken]

Just here to say, that some of the best information concerning the lifestyle and the best insights I have found were from Dom friends.

So, this thread is something that I will read and not interfere with.

I look forward to eavesdropping on the topics as a Dom's views are likely to help me be a better partner for my own Dom, wherever he may be.

Thanks WD for the thread.

Keep on rapping about the Domly stuff. It serves more purposes than one.

*following forced back out to the henhouse*

 

[Quint]

*struts in, garbed in corset, garter belt, and hose*

Heard there was a contest?

*sees Sierra* Aww, dammit....

 

[WriterDom]

So how would a Dom Dominated message board differ from this one? One where a Dom wrote the rules. One where for much of it's life, only a handful of female subs dropped in.

 

[areacode613]

OK so lets talk about something then!

OK! So if you don't like a post IGNORE IT!! That person will drop it if no one responds.
--------------------

Now lets talk about something from a "DOMS" Point of view, I'll just kick this out as a general question.
-------------------

As a DOM do you prefer a submissive

a)-24/7 (live in)
b) Part Time(-Keeping a misstress)
c)One Time Encounter

 

[forced]

So how would a Dom Dominated message board differ from this one? One where a Dom wrote the rules. One where for much of it's life, only a handful of female subs dropped in.

For some reason... I'm picturing a football team. Lots of manly men cheering each other on and slapping each other on the ass.

Oh, wait.

Sorry... I'm just kidding.

I know that's very far from true.

I don't think that a Dom dominated message board would be any better (or worse) than a board overrun with female subs. I think the difference might be that people would be less afraid of speaking their minds and even less worried about stepping on toes.

In short, I think it would give the BDSM forum a more Gen Board kind of feel.

For the record, I love the Gen Board.. but it is a completely different animal. People in the BDSM forum are more here to learn about a specific lifestyle, share their experiences, etc. The Gen Board is like The Playground filled with quasi-intellectuals and smart-mouths.




P.S. You can only have so many alpha-male mentalities before things start to get a lil' ugly. I think we need to find a happy medium. Easier said than done, I know.

 

[artful]

Re: OK so lets talk about something then!

OK! So if you don't like a post IGNORE IT!! That person will drop it if no one responds.
--------------------

Now lets talk about something from a "DOMS" Point of view, I'll just kick this out as a general question.
-------------------

As a DOM do you prefer a submissive

a)-24/7 (live in)
b) Part Time(-Keeping a misstress)
c)One Time Encounter

I like (B),...but as a 24/7 TPE.

 

[BBD]

Re: OK so lets talk about something then!

OK! So if you don't like a post IGNORE IT!! That person will drop it if no one responds.
--------------------

Now lets talk about something from a "DOMS" Point of view, I'll just kick this out as a general question.
-------------------

As a DOM do you prefer a submissive

a)-24/7 (live in)
b) Part Time(-Keeping a misstress)
c)One Time Encounter

Same here, as I sit and think about it. B...as 24/7 TPE.
But if I had to choose, I'd go with A

 

[PhoenixPrime01]

What about A and B?
Why not a 24/7 as well as part time submissives, with all understanding that's a distinct possibility from the outset of course. Orrrr, possibly a poly setting with two or more submissives either 24/7 or changing as circumstances dictate and sometimes all together at one time and I'm not just talking about play or sex but just together regardless of the activity.

 

[artful]

Prime

What about A and B?
Why not a 24/7 as well as part time submissives, with all understanding that's a distinct possibility from the outset of course. Orrrr, possibly a poly setting with two or more submissives either 24/7 or changing as circumstances dictate and sometimes all together at one time and I'm not just talking about play or sex but just together regardless of the activity.

Any variable is possible to have,...I was only stating MY preference. Hope ya don't mind me shortening your ID,...please call me Art,...ALL my friends do.

 

[PhoenixPrime01]

To Art:

Not at all and thank you. *s* It's usually just PP. *LOL*

True but just mentioning possibilities is all, so long as done with the knowledge of all involved and not as vanilla's do sneaking around without the SO, or in our cast submissive involved with, not knowing about the "other woman/women" or for us submissives.

 

[MechaBlade]

[Opens door]

Hey everyone. I brought nachos.

 

[artful]

Blade

[Opens door]

Hey everyone. I brought nachos.

Thanks for the snacks,...just open the bag and mix'em in with the large bowl of Chili Cheese chips on the table.

Uhh,...I think WD has some 'Vanilla' Coke in the reefer,...sit down and make yourself at home. Is this your first visit to our Forum?

If so,... please read the *sticky* at the top of our Forum page by clicking on the link below.

http://www.literotica.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=93088

Also,...you may wish to post a little bit of info on our newcomers thread,...the next link below.

http://www.literotica.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=81549

Hope ya don't mind me shortening your ID to Blade,
please just call me Art.

Make yourself at home,...read the threads,...post comments, ask questions,...start your own thread whenever you feel like it. Enjoy your stay with us.

 

[MechaBlade]

Yes this is one of my first few posts at BDSM. Call me Mecha, call me MechB, call me Blade. Whatever's comfortable.

Can I call you Antidisestablishmentarianism? (I was reading the "nickname" thread)

 

[artful]

Blade

Yes this is one of my first few posts at BDSM. Call me Mecha, call me MechB, call me Blade. Whatever's comfortable.

Can I call you Antidisestablishmentarianism? (I was reading the "nickname" thread)

Of course,...I actually thought of using the

"Pseudoantidisestablishmentarianism" as my ID,...

but then I figured someone would shorten it to "Sue",...and that just wouldn't do! Never gave a thought to...

"Ultrapseudoantidisestablishmentarianism"

...or I probably would have used it. "Ultra",...
not a bad sound,...connects with 'Violet Wand' pretty well.

Oh well,...I guess I'll just STICK with Art,... though Crafts wouldn't be bad either.

 

[MechaBlade]

lol

 

[Gil_T2]

Hi fellow DOMS

I've been a DOM/MASTER for 6 years now and love the gift that my
subs/slaves give me...their trust.
I have 2 subs at the present and both now do as told when told without question.I am still learning and so are they.

WHY haven't I found this end of LIT sooner.

 

[artful]

Re: Hi fellow DOMS

I've been a DOM/MASTER for 6 years now and love the gift that my
subs/slaves give me...their trust.
I have 2 subs at the present and both now do as told when told without question.I am still learning and so are they.

WHY haven't I found this end of LIT sooner.

Hello Gil,...and welcome to the REAL BDSM Forum.
I take it you are not familiar with this Forum at Lit,...though you have been to other Forums and are experienced.

If so,... please read the *sticky* at the top of our Forum page by clicking on the
link below.

http://www.literotica.com/forum/sho...&threadid=93088

Also,...you may wish to post a little bit of info on our newcomers thread,...the
next link below.

http://www.literotica.com/forum/sho...&threadid=81549

Hope ya don't mind me shortening your ID to Gil,
please just call me Art.

Make yourself at home,...read the threads,...post comments, ask
questions,...start your own thread whenever you feel like it. Enjoy your stay with
us.

 

[WriterDom]

Welcome to our new Doms. We'll have to get a few more tables out of the back.



c)One Time Encounter


The only time I'd want an one time encounter would be if there was really bad chemistry. If the first was good, it just opens up more possibilities for future scenes. Nothing wrong with short term playing as long as both parties are on the same page as to where it's going. Sometimes if you can't find the one you want, you have to love the one your with.

 

[WillowPuss]

Please excuse the intrusion - I realise I shouldn't be here ....

but (didn't ya know there was going to be a but?)

would it be possible for me to ask a question?

 

[PhoenixPrime01]

Hello WillowPuss. Of course it would be possible. Please ask away. I know you'll get several replies to consider. *s
PP

 

[WriterDom]

Please excuse the intrusion - I realise I shouldn't be here ....

but (didn't ya know there was going to be a but?)

would it be possible for me to ask a question?

questions are welcome. And by asking if you can ask aren't you asking your second question?

 

[WillowPuss]

questions are welcome. And by asking if you can ask aren't you asking your second question?

well, yes, I suppose it will be a second question!

Ok - here goes.


I have read on this thread that people do not think that the women who claim to be submissives on this forum are submissives. Or rather - they do not act in the way a lifestyle submissive would act.

Now, I am a submissive in a 24/7 TPE relationship with my Master (who is also my husband).
I consider myself a true submissive
Others I have met also consider me a true submissive.

I have behaved here as I behave anywhere.


My question .... how do each of you expect a submissive to behave, to speak, to write?



I am asking - not to rake up an arguement - but to learn.
Thanks