The Real JBJ Fan Club

[NightL]

My friends are sending me complaints about the poor quality of the posts on this thread.

But everyone hates me. Everyone loves pmann, Everyone hates Jim.

So the people who complain about your posts are your friends?

misquoting is so much fun

 

[subdued_passion]

Good point. But I've seen one man who's able to mix his urine and semen, and its amazing. Wear a face mask!

- JBK, sharing beauty tips.

I like the simplicity of this recipe, so unlike other homemade facials.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

- JBK, sharing beauty tips.

I like the simplicity of this recipe, so unlike other homemade facials.

It looks like a garden hose sprayer blasting dust off a car. I wondered where he concealed the pressure tank. Reminded me of comics who bathe each other in seltzer water.

 

[subdued_passion]

I think beating yourself up is always a good idea. Its cathartic. All the QUE SARA, SARA narcissism corrodes your soul. I mean, we never hesitate a New York minute to beat the other guy for his fuck-ups.

I cant fathom why you're married but I know sex is low priority for many, in fact many cant do sex for legitimate reasons.

True confessions rightfully go along with remorse and penance. I like honesty but STFU oughta be at the top of any list for making marriage or a job or anything work.


Try and remember that when you eat out God only knows where the cooks hands have been. I always think of the movie I saw where an old asshole kept returning his burger to the kitchen for fresher mayonnaise. Well, he got it finally. So we collect crap everywhere we go. You prolly have no idea of all the other stuff that clings to your underpants, like barnacles.

- JBJ, on HPV and adultery

 

[subdued_passion]

Guys? Can we talk?

If she wants you she'll come get you. She wont hesitate, she wont be shy.

And if you got your shit together she'll be a dream come true.

I always say to young guys: Don't chase them. Rather, work on being rich, keep fit, smile, date lotsa gals (cuz they always want what the other girls got), and STFU. She already believes that you let your dick do all your heavy thinking, so she's interested in your health and wealth.

Bachelors are guys that no women want.

-JBJ, on finding 'the one'.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

-JBJ, on finding 'the one'.

The best free advice anywhere!

 

[subdued_passion]

McLIT is a troll/moron magnet that automaticially filters lower life forms from the general social intercourse and stores them in one place for disinfection and disposal. Old McLIT posts are pulverized, sanitized, and recycled as Al Gore speeches.

- JBJ, addressing the following complaint against the GB.

I thought this was a forum for politics and radical stuff. I come here, find some threads, and instead of anything relating to politics, government policies, astrology or UFO conspiracies, I find sexy naked threads.

I'm a proud conspiracy nutcase and a member of the ban sexy naked threads community, but this is an embarrassment. Where does this come from?

Also please DON'T link me to all the sexy naked threads, I need to masturbate think.

 

[subdued_passion]

The best free advice anywhere!

But, but, but, what about the antelope and the fish and the lid to the pot?

I am confuzzled.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

But, but, but, what about the antelope and the fish and the lid to the pot?

I am confuzzled.

My Readers make the same complaint. Its kinda scary when the whole world is wrong, and I'm right. The responsibility is a huge burden.

 

[subdued_passion]

Smarter people are mostly faggots, and have fewer babies. But I blame our colleges, they cant crankout queers as fast as tards can fuck. I mean, a quality fairy takes at least 4 years for a perfesser to work around to being a Democrat. Tards can make new tards over nite.

- JBJ, on why ugly and retarded people seem to get laid more than others.

 

[subdued_passion]

My Readers make the same complaint. Its kinda scary when the whole world is wrong, and I'm right. The responsibility is a huge burden.

Yes, I can imagine. Now, tell me honestly did you first make the chicken or the egg?

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Yes, I can imagine. Now, tell me honestly did you first make the chicken or the egg?

The egg came first, of course. Eggs need chickens to make more eggs, so the chicken is an appliance, like a toaster.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

It came to me in a dream this morning.

If you want to finally understand women, down to the center of her soul, read FIRST BLOOD by David Morrell or watch the RAMBO movie. The universal female is John Rambo.

 

[subdued_passion]

It came to me in a dream this morning.

If you want to finally understand women, down to the center of her soul, read FIRST BLOOD by David Morrell or watch the RAMBO movie. The universal female is John Rambo.

You know what, I always identified more with Balboa. Not coz I have a southpaw... just coz I got hit so many times on the head as a kid I talk like I ees stoopeed.

 

[subdued_passion]

I usta live close to a school for wanton girls, and every afternoon what I did was tie a few marijuana joints to fishing line, and cast out to the sidewalk as they walked by. When they kneeled to get the pot I reeled the line in closer.

- JBJ, excerpt from his novel 'Luring Basics'.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

- JBJ, excerpt from his novel 'Luring Basics'.

Its the sequel to my best seller: PIE AINT ALL A BBW WANTS IN HER MOUTH, Sometimes she wants a Whopper.

 

[subdued_passion]

Its the sequel to my best seller: PIE AINT ALL A BBW WANTS IN HER MOUTH, Sometimes she wants a Whopper.

What about the ugly ones?

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

What about the ugly ones?

There are no ugly women.

There are only men with immature-unripe girl appreciator mental organs.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

http://www.amazon.com/gp/cdp/member..._pdp_see_all?ie=UTF8&sort_by=MostRecentReview

Here's a treat for my adoring fans.

 

[subdued_passion]

http://www.amazon.com/gp/cdp/member..._pdp_see_all?ie=UTF8&sort_by=MostRecentReview

Here's a treat for my adoring fans.

And someday it will be a book... and not a book review, that will be linked to this thread.

 

[subdued_passion]

There are no ugly women.

There are only men with immature-unripe girl appreciator mental organs.

Wow JBJ, with lines like these who needs drugs.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

And someday it will be a book... and not a book review, that will be linked to this thread.

You cant handle a Jim Johnson book.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Another treat for my fans is Uncle Jims Gems. An advice thread for guys with girl problems.

 

[subdued_passion]

Another treat for my fans is Uncle Jims Gems. An advice thread for guys with girl problems.

Link please.

 

[subdued_passion]

Sure. I spent lotsa time in the ghetto. Sex is something that's an economic niche in the black community, you don't see black maids these days but black women still work for whites, and the traditional interactions persist. That is, Shanice don't do the laundry but she still do daddy at the office. Her girlfriend, Keita, even gets her the job. Shanice's man don't care. He gets her money. More money for him.

Sex fuels a significant part of the ghetto economy. Welfare is instant income and benefits for the young mom. When childrens protective services gets involved grandmother gets money, too. Plenty of men pimp the girls they know. A street walker needs protection, and that's the pimps job. He's like her business manager. Lawyers feed off the chaos and tumult in the ghetto. Most get money from the government to represent girls pinched for prostitution or charged with child abuse or neglect. I once terminated parental rights to ten children of one mother. We couldn't seat all the lawyers at the defendants table.

In one case the mom was 15, and the daddy possibles were astronomical, and included 4 brothers, dad, uncles, cousins, most of her male neighbors, most of her male friends, and a few teachers and clergy.

So we had criminal arraignments and family court arraignments, and it took a week to process the whole crew thru the door before we started the paternity tests. The winner was one of her brothers.

- JBJ, excerpts from 'Ghettonomics'