The SCURRILOUS reader - for both whack jobs and mommy lovers . . .

[_Lynn_]

I work?

 

[BarbarouSevil]

I work?

I'll be there in half an hour. Less if I can get my promise-fulfilling shaft to go down enough to get it under the steering wheel.

You don't mind if I bring a couple of cousins with me, do you? I'm sitting for one of my aunts today (one of the ones not in jail), and the little vixens are bored with the vibrators they brought with them.

SCURRILOUS

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

I work?

Mmm... you can work on me, Lynn

 

[Selena_Kitt]

Mmm... you can work on me, Lynn

That is one FINE AV Miss Jenny!

 

[Adi87]

That is one FINE AV Miss Jenny!

I second that.I still cant stop drooling over it!!!

 

[BarbarouSevil]

Whoa!! SCURRILOUS saw this page today and realized that he hadn't been surrounded by this many beautiful women since the incident that gave rise to his famous, best-selling epic poem, "The Midnight Bus of Scurrilous" (24 spinzillion views, 32 million votes, 2.32):

One by land and two by sea,
They may be my sisters,
But I still want all three.​

Welcome, Lynn, Jenny, and Selena, to the SCURRILOUS Reader. Please stay as long as you like and come back often.

SCURRILOUS

 

[_Lynn_]

Mmm... you can work on me, Lynn

That wouldn't be exactly what I call 'work', Jenny.....

 

[BarbarouSevil]

Haiku Contest!

One of my many correspondents suggested that what this thread needs is a haiku contest. Apparently, "haiku" is a very ancient Japanese art form, defined by Wikipedia as "Japanese poetry, the late 19th century revision by Masaoka Shiki of the older hokku (発句, hokku?), the opening verse of a linked verse form, haikai no renga. The traditional hokku consisted of a pattern of approximately 5, 7, 5 on. The Japanese word on, meaning "sound", corresponds to a mora, a phonetic unit similar but not identical to the syllable of a language such as English. (The words onji, ("sound symbol") or moji (character symbol) are also sometimes used.) A haiku contains a special season word (the kigo) representative of the season in which the renga is set, or a reference to the natural world."

Is that clear? Can somebody explain it to me?

It sounds just fascinating. <YAWN> But SCURRILOUS spent the whole weekend with his little sister, FURLESS, so he didn't have time to come up with anything else. Therefore, I'm pleased to announce:

[size=+3]The SCURRILOUS Haiku Contest[/size]​

Everyone is eligible to win except SCURRILOUS and cloudy, who won the last contest. As usual on Literotica, however, she is nonetheless encouraged to enter, even if she can't win (whyever for, I have no idea). Anyway, I will start you off:

Sister so lovely,
In prom gown of gray-green silk;
Shall we do it now?​

It meets the requisite form, it has a kigo or seasonal word ("prom"), and it is about making it with a relative. Your turn. Entries must be e-marked no later than Friday at 1800 GMT.

 

[Furless]

The SCURRILOUS Haiku Contest

Big brother of mine
You're a sick twisted bastard
Summer will be cru'l

 

[jomar]

Big brother of mine
You're a sick twisted bastard
Summer will be cru'l

Not bad! But I think your point would have been more forceful and dramatic if you used "fucking" or the more colloquial "fuckin" instead of twisted; the reason being that everyone knows without doubt that someone fucking their sister is, by definition, twisted. On the upside, nice truncation of cruel to the one syllable cru'l to meet the haiku format requirements. Also, nice work using the required seasonal reference, even though it's a bit contrived. Good luck in the contest!

 

[Furless]

Not bad! But I think your point would have been more forceful and dramatic if you used "fucking" or the more colloquial "fuckin" instead of twisted; the reason being that everyone knows without doubt that someone fucking their sister is, by definition, twisted. On the upside, nice truncation of cruel to the one syllable cru'l to meet the haiku format requirements. Also, nice work using the required seasonal reference, even though it's a bit contrived. Good luck in the contest!

Ah, but contrary to what he says, he never had a chance to be a "fuckin" anything. He keeps expecting me to be like our cousins, but I grew up in the same house as he and know his hygiene habits.

 

[BarbarouSevil]

Ah, but contrary to what he says, he never had a chance to be a "fuckin" anything. He keeps expecting me to be like our cousins, but I grew up in the same house as he and know his hygiene habits.

Furless! How delightful! I didn't know Mom let you use the computer! After that unfortunate accident with the toaster last spring, I thought you were limited to appliances that didn't usee electricity, like can openers and cheese graters.

I'm very pleased to tell you that so far, your haiku is all by itself in first place. Try to keep your petty jealousies about our cousins, and their understandable fascination with me, off the public forums, though, huh? We can talk about it later tonight. Much later, if you get my drift. I think you do.

 

[Furless]

Furless! How delightful! I didn't know Mom let you use the computer! After that unfortunate accident with the toaster last spring, I thought you were limited to appliances that didn't usee electricity, like can openers and cheese graters.

I'm very pleased to tell you that so far, your haiku is all by itself in first place. Try to keep your petty jealousies about our cousins, and their understandable fascination with me, off the public forums, though, huh? We can talk about it later tonight. Much later, if you get my drift. I think you do.

I swear by all that is unholy that if you come pounding on my door again tonight, I'm going to have Uncle Lector beat the crap out of you!

Oh, and let's not continue that lie about the toaster. It wasn't ME that blew it up--along with half the kitchen. You can lie to Mama all you want but you and I know the truth, don't we? I would've thought that the third degree burns on that little glob of flesh that dangles between your legs would be enough of a reminder. Just exactly how did you manage to get it stuck in the toaster, anyway?

 

[BarbarouSevil]

I swear by all that is unholy that if you come pounding on my door again tonight, I'm going to have Uncle Lector beat the crap out of you!

Oh, and let's not continue that lie about the toaster. It wasn't ME that blew it up--along with half the kitchen. You can lie to Mama all you want but you and I know the truth, don't we? I would've thought that the third degree burns on that little glob of flesh that dangles between your legs would be enough of a reminder. Just exactly how did you manage to get it stuck in the toaster, anyway?

All right, sweetie, first of all, there's a haiku contest going on, and nobody's entering it because they're all afraid of getting PMs from my little sister Furless, well-known around our house as the queen of PMS. So maybe we could just talk about this tonight. Is that okay? Honey?

Second of all, you know perfectly well his name is Uncle Larry, and he's the nicest guy on the face of the earth. You call him Lector because he always likes to scare you with that hockey mask, but you shouldn't let other people think we're a bunch of weirdos. Other than the whole incest, SCURRILOUS-worship business, we're just like any other family.

And third, as you'll recall, I was still on your side of the door when I was pounding on it, trying to get away from your insatiable demands for more and more sex. I'm sure that sometimes I don't fully appreciate how much you need me, and how all of the demands made by your other sisters and your cousins and your aunts take away from our time together. I should remember that you weren't nicknamed Furless because of your PETA membership.

Now, we'll just talk at home. Okay? No more tantrums, sweetie? I'll bring you home your favorite lollipop!

 

[Furless]

All right, sweetie, first of all, there's a haiku contest going on, and nobody's entering it because they're all afraid of getting PMs from my little sister Furless, well-known around our house as the queen of PMS. So maybe we could just talk about this tonight. Is that okay? Honey?

Second of all, you know perfectly well his name is Uncle Larry, and he's the nicest guy on the face of the earth. You call him Lector because he always likes to scare you with that hockey mask, but you shouldn't let other people think we're a bunch of weirdos. Other than the whole incest, SCURRILOUS-worship business, we're just like any other family.

And third, as you'll recall, I was still on your side of the door when I was pounding on it, trying to get away from your insatiable demands for more and more sex. I'm sure that sometimes I don't fully appreciate how much you need me, and how all of the demands made by your other sisters and your cousins and your aunts take away from our time together. I should remember that you weren't nicknamed Furless because of your PETA membership.

Now, we'll just talk at home. Okay? No more tantrums, sweetie? I'll bring you home your favorite lollipop!

Wow. You can count to three. When'd you learn that trick?

Finish the story, brother dear. When you were pounding on the door, trying to escape, it because I woke up and found you crawling in my bed. When I took after you with my bullwhip, you couldn't run fast enough. Too bad you were arrogant enough to lock the door when you sneaked in. Butthead.

PMS? I think you have that wrong. The only one around here with PMS is you. Yeah, that's what all the cousins are saying--Pre-Mature-Scurrilous.

There ain't no way in hell you're gettin' near me tonight, you mama's boy. And don't call me sweetie--or honey, or baby, or snooky-wooky. I'm gettin' outa this fucked up family! Christttt, where is my plane ticket?

 

[jomar]

The SCURRILOUS Haiku Contest

I pondered the task;
hot haiku contest. Instead,
I fucked my sister.

 

[jomar]

Thank you, thank you. I humbly accept the first place award for the haiku contest. *prayer bow* Much love to all.

 

[jomar]

My check's not here yet. What's the deal?

 

[SweetWitch]

Interesting facts

I found this interesting tidbit:

Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by extreme focus on oneself, and is a maladaptive, rigid, and persistent condition that may cause significant distress and functional impairment.

I came across that little definition while doing some research on Greek Mythology. In one tale, Narcissus died because he could only love his image at the expense of himself. Seems a little familiar.

I also found this:

Otto Kernberg described malignant narcissism as a syndrome characterized by a narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), antisocial features, paranoid traits, and ego-syntonic aggression. Some also may find an absence of conscience, a psychological need for power, and a sense of importance (grandiosity).

Intriguing...

Sound like anyone we know, Scourrilous?

 

[drksideofthemoon]

I found this interesting tidbit:


Sound like anyone we know, Scourrilous?

Snicker, snicker, snicker....

 

[Guest]

I found this interesting tidbit:



I came across that little definition while doing some research on Greek Mythology. In one tale, Narcissus died because he could only love his image at the expense of himself. Seems a little familiar.

I also found this:



Intriguing...

Sound like anyone we know, Scourrilous?

It sounds like half the people I know...

 

[SweetWitch]

It sounds like half the people I know...

Though many people have some tendency toward narcissism as a form of emotional defense from the environment that surrounds us, there is a huge difference in the person with NPD or Malignant NPD. The items that I found went on to talk about certain types of sexual deviancy that go hand in hand with the mental illness. Makes me shudder for any offspring that might be produced.

Now, I have to go smack my narcissisitic husband just for the hell of it.

 

[BarbarouSevil]

Apologies to one and all. Scurrilous has had some family problems to take care of. Thank goodness for that Roe v. Wade thing, huh?

First of all the winner of the Haiku contest is, of course,

[size=+4]JOMAR[/size]​

Even though "hot" doesn't really qualify as a kigo, or special season word, in that context, Jomar's was the only entry not from a member of SCURRILOUS's immediate family, all of whom were necessarily ineligible for the contest (even if they did shock the heck out of SCURRILOUS by being able to actually write a haiku (yeah, you know who we're talkin' about, Furless)).

Anyway, for his prize, Jomar will be featured in the newest edition to the SCURRILOUS best-selling library, "Can't take no more, you and Jomar" (projected 43 poontillion views, 43 million votes, 2.43), the first multi-family story SCURRILOUS has written (although Jomar is living with two of SCURRILOUS's sisters already, so we're really one big happy...).

Finally, as for DanielleKitten and SweetWitch, it is nice to see you babes getting along so well together, trading posts and all. Apparently they're getting along better than the rest of us realize. In Kitten's blog, the "Litter Box," we read: "Sweetwitch and I were discussing on whether or not it would be possible to have sex in a ferris wheel." I say, girls, if it's your first time together, get a room! You'll want to do your initial exploring in private. Later you can branch out to your ferris wheel sex. (Incidentally, it would be impossible for SCURRILOUS to have sex on a ferris wheel; he actually can't ride the ferris wheel anymore because if he sees one of his cousins at the carnival, his rock-hard, hugenormous cock bends the guard bar, rendering that car completely useless for the rest of the carnival.)

As for you dreckside, no snickering on this thread.

 

[Guest]

Apologies to one and all. Scurrilous has had some family problems to take care of. Thank goodness for that Roe v. Wade thing, huh?

First of all the winner of the Haiku contest is, of course,

[size=+4]JOMAR[/size]​

Even though "hot" doesn't really qualify as a kigo, or special season word, in that context, Jomar's was the only entry not from a member of SCURRILOUS's immediate family, all of whom were necessarily ineligible for the contest (even if they did shock the heck out of SCURRILOUS by being able to actually write a haiku (yeah, you know who we're talkin' about, Furless)).

Anyway, for his prize, Jomar will be featured in the newest edition to the SCURRILOUS best-selling library, "Can't take no more, you and Jomar" (projected 43 poontillion views, 43 million votes, 2.43), the first multi-family story SCURRILOUS has written (although Jomar is living with two of SCURRILOUS's sisters already, so we're really one big happy...).

Finally, as for DanielleKitten and SweetWitch, it is nice to see you babes getting along so well together, trading posts and all. Apparently they're getting along better than the rest of us realize. In Kitten's blog, the "Litter Box," we read: "Sweetwitch and I were discussing on whether or not it would be possible to have sex in a ferris wheel." I say, girls, if it's your first time together, get a room! You'll want to do your initial exploring in private. Later you can branch out to your ferris wheel sex. (Incidentally, it would be impossible for SCURRILOUS to have sex on a ferris wheel; he actually can't ride the ferris wheel anymore because if he sees one of his cousins at the carnival, his rock-hard, hugenormous cock bends the guard bar, rendering that car completely useless for the rest of the carnival.)

As for you dreckside, no snickering on this thread.

What about a snerk? "snerk!"

 

[BarbarouSevil]

No, it's the intent that counts, and apparently to snerk is "To emit a brief sound in the intention of snickering, only to have it come out come out sounding more like a snort. 2. To act like a know-it-all." So it's still snickering in one sense, and in another, patently absurd. This particular thread only has room for one know-it-all, and fortunately, his was the very first post in the whole thing. Why, the thread's even named after him. That's right, it's

[size=+3]SCURRILOUS​

[/size]

Doesn't SW object to your leaving her there in bed, getting all cold under the covers, while you run to your computer and flirt with men?