Twenty Somethings

[My Own Way]

Okay, here's something I really, REALLY hate. People telling me to go and tell the girl that I like her. Why? Because everytime I tell a girl I like her, she gets embarrassed and then she tells people and everybody tells everbody and by the end of the day, word hops around that I like this girl and lots of people laugh at me and that girl I told I liked avoids me at all costs even if I'm not looking for her. I'm talking about the girls that I've talked to after awhile, kind of gotten to know a bit and I end up THINKING that there was some kind of connection or something, so I let her know about my feelings.

Alright...those are some valid points...but honestly...no matter what you do...if you tell a girl you like her, or you look at her funny...she's gonna tell her friends...it's pretty inevitable...not to the extent that she tells EVERYONE and then avoids you...but she's gonna tell some people...get used to it. As for hanging out with her for awhile and getting the lay of the land first before you tell her you like her....well first of all...I don't see any reason to just tell someone you like them...this is just a personal thing I guess...but I'd much rather someone showed me they liked me than to come right out and tell me. Actions say more than words. But here's an idea to just try for awhile...let a girl come to you. That's not to say that you should go sit somewhere in a corner and think that some girl is going to come strolling up...we girls like to avoid unknown men and strange corners....but seriously if you make yourself available at places, hang out with friends...be a happy, positive, person...just see what happens. You never know till you try...

 

[Munachi]

hmyes... i was thinking about when was the last time i told someone i liked them, or someone told me they liked me, using those or similar words... and i can't think of any ocasion after my teenage years. after that it was always more something of meeting someone as a friend and there obviously being more of a connection and then one day things just happened and it was just natural to be together then. neither were there really situations of defining whether we are boyfriend and girlfriend now, or just kissing/having sex/going out/whatever... so there were phases of confusion but actually they were great...

but on the other hand i suppose it can be a problem when the girl doesn't know at all whether he is interested, or if he waits too long to show her clearly... for example i can think of several friends of mine of whom i am pretty sure they were or are interested in me, and i was too at some point, but i just got bored with it after a while. now of course, i agree that a girl should make a move too, but in those cases i wasn't quite interested enough for that, or i made a few steps towards them, didn`t get the reaction i wanted, and thus got bored... and i guess i am a bit conservative in these things. while i will take some initiative there is a certain point at which i just like the guy to take initiative...

 

[HybridCrow]

This is a general response to the current topic:

First off, I can say I am about the same when it gomes to honesty. I am usually TOO honest and that tends to get me in trouble, and I think I remember somebody saying that if you're too honest, some people can't trust you. So, yeah, don't worry about it. I mean, I always thought if you showed that you were an honest person, people would want you around more, but nowadays, it takes a great personality more often than not.

Secondly, I guess maybe I am the person that "sits in the corner, expecting girls to come up to me" and I should mellow the fuck out. I am trying that more often now.

Also, for both points above, and of course I doubt I'll ever learn about women, but for God's sake, we're MEN!! We're stupid!! Or maybe I'm stupid, I don't know... I just think it's a general census thing. Anyways, what I mean is... I can't work through the mind games as much anymore. Subtle hints aren't helping me anything. I usually like it straightforward. Yes, actions DO speak louder than words, but sometimes actions are misinterpretted. I don't mean I ALWAYS want things to be simple, I'm just saying if things were to get serious, it'd help for a bit of simplicity so that I don't get the wrong idea and regret it later in life.

Thirdly, I don't think I've mentioned this before, but I will say it now. I don't think of them as g/fs as much because they were only online and we never really met. However, there is this one girl I had talked to for over 3 years. We had stopped talking for a long time and I didn't know why until today when I FINALLY got an email from her that just made me feel better knowing that she still thinks of me. I think in two of those years that I have known her online, I fell in love with her. When I found out why she stopped talking to me, I felt bad. I don't remember what happened, but I do know that it was my male ego/jealousy that drove her away for that time being. We're talking again now. She and I had been making plans to meet each other and it's just that working jobs isn't easy for making that happen. Especially since it took me almost 2 years just to get the jobs I already have right now, but she says, and I quote "I would love to meet you." So that tells me that there is still hope and I really also hope that when we meet that we will be right for each other. We seemed to really connect and I just really think it would be really great to finally meet her and get to know her more personally.

I have sent her an email, or reply actually, that I was going to find out when my step-cuz plans to go back to California to see family and I hope it will be after the HOlidays cause then I would DEFINITELY be able to schedule the time off so that we can both go at the same time and while I get to meet his family and friends, I also get to do what I have always wanted to do in those 3 years I have talked to this girl. She's really sweet, caring, and the most BEAUTIFUL girl I have ever met (online anyways).

I have always been afraid she would reject me in person, but I have also talked to her about that and from what she says, it looks like she will not reject me, seeing as how we've talked for those years and she likes me for me.

So now, it's time for me to start acting up... and if these words seem more correct, to grow up. You guys have been and most likely will always be great to me. I know, I've been such a downer and perhaps it is true that we'll all be that way in some point in our lives, I really want to be a better, much happier person than I have been for the last 5 or so years of my life.


Sorry this reply was long, but hopefully it will be worth the read. Despite not working in about 4 hours, I still have a few things I need to get done to get ready before working. Y'all have a good night.

 

[Munachi]

just saying hello... well good luck crow, but if things don't work out the way you hope don't be too crushed either... enjoy talking to her right now, and there, and openly, and if it is just some talking, enjoy it for that...

 

[BXGemini20]

No replys in awhile. People must be busy with papers and other things. Hope everyone is doing okay.

 

[HybridCrow]

Yeah, kinda realized it's dead a bit... I've been busy working and things like that.

Umm... a little update on the situation with me and the other girl.

We're talking more now... slowly, but surely talking more. It turns out that she thinks about me a lot and that she still wants me. I think I'm sure I want her. She's the most beautiful girl I've ever met (online anyways) that likes me for me and hasn't rejected me. I guess I am a great guy after all.
I'm now making it a priority slightly above getting rid of my debts to save up as much money and as soon as possible as I can to go to California. I'm sure I'll need a hotel room considering I don't know if her parents would allow me to stay over, which is no biggie because I would like them to get to know me first and to know they can trust me.

She's got an ex-b/f in which I don't know the details of the story, but I think she says she wants to tell me about it. I don't really think I need to know about it, but if she feels she should tell me about it, I will listen. I have always told her that if she wanted to talk to me (email of course), that I would be there for her and try my best to comfort her even though we're not really together personally.

I believe that a successful relationship, and this is based on my observations, is based on trust, honesty, love, and everyone is willing to talk to the other and listen as well. To compromise and to be willing to work things out with each other to make things work.

I don't know... Maybe I do know more than I really think I do about relationships even though I've never really had one. True, experience counts, but what about observation? To learn from each other? I have never been more happier when I was talking to her before our contact breakup than I have ever been in life. I WANT to go to California and to meet her because I think we're for each other and if I don't go, we'll never know for sure. I was going to go after the Holidays, but those plans changed because my step-cuz is actually leaving sooner than he thought he'd be leaving and I'm unable to go because I DO have to work. Hopefully something will happen and great things will become of it.

For now, I'll just keep talking to her and enjoy life as it is and hope for the best of things to come.

 

[Munachi]

just a short hello... had to be somewhere to meet a professor fifteen minutes ago and still stuck in the internet cafe because i need to upload some pictures first and they take forever... grrr...

 

[mastagraff]

Hey girl whats goin on havent talked to you in a bit. just saying whats up.

 

[BXGemini20]

Just thought I wish an early Happy Thanksgving to all. I'm a bit down since my laptop screwed up again. I can't catch a break with a laptop.

 

[1stClassNiceGuy]

Just checkin' in, seein' how everyone's doing. Wish I could stop by more often but work is a bitch and a half!

Hope everyone's well.

 

[Munachi]

hm... haven't been here in a while... and only three new posts? ah well... now i am here and posting...

 

[BXGemini20]

Too quiet around here....

 

[Munachi]

true... *MAKES LOT OF NOISE*

 

[jujee]

Hope you all have a Happy Thanksgiving!

I'm 3 hours away from my family... and a poor student working full time, so I'm stuck by myself. Oh well! I'll get some Christmas shopping done!

Enjoy!!!

 

[HybridCrow]

Well, I've been really busy these past few weeks and I usually kept forgetting about this website.

Anyhow, the best thing happened to me Sunday night after work. Well, actually I think the best thing would be getting laid, but this is good enough for me.

The best thing that happened was the girl I'm talking to from California called me after work. It was awesome! Her voice sounded almost the way I had imagined it. She was just great! We talked for like 45 minutes non-stop and then when we were saying our "byes", she said, "I love you." like she was excited about me.

She's like the only girl outside of family who has said she loved me and sounded like she meant it. Of course, I know I shouldn't take it too soon because there are different degrees of love, but this was exciting because no girl has ever said that to me.

Anyhow, I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving. I know I will. I have two families to see and then a bunch of us are supposedly going to a titty bar sometime around 9 or 10 when all is said and done.

Take cares!

 

[BXGemini20]

Hope everyone is having a good turkey day. I know I am. I fixed my laptop. I'm choosing to stay away from family this year. I got too much schoolwork I have procastnated on the past few weeks. Got use this break to my advantage.

 

[Munachi]

no thanksgiving for me. but my austrian great-cousin is coming to berlin tomorrow...

 

[HybridCrow]

So this might not sound exciting to a lot of you, but Thanksgiving night I went to my first strip club! Right away I ended up getting my first lapdance... it was actually.... WoW!

I think my biggest mistake was buying two more lapdances from the same girl. Why? Cause all day at work, I kept smiling because I couldn't get her body all over me out of my head. At least I was in a good mood though so I couldn't get in trouble. lol... but nevertheless, although I'm told it's a great thing because I've never ACTUALLY had a naked chick on me at all, and I should cherish the memory.

Well, that was my greatest Thanksgiving day ever! lol... I hope everyone had a great time though!

Nighters.

 

[KinkyBoyUK]

hi sounds like you had a great time! reminds me of when i visted a strip club on a stag weekend back in april!

just wanted to tell you lot ive been reading through this thread and you all seem such cool people!

ive been browsing around here and some of these threads seem really busy and hard to keep up with!

 

[BXGemini20]

hi sounds like you had a great time! reminds me of when i visted a strip club on a stag weekend back in april!

just wanted to tell you lot ive been reading through this thread and you all seem such cool people!

ive been browsing around here and some of these threads seem really busy and hard to keep up with!

Well post more often.

 

[HybridCrow]

Yeah, I actually did have a good time.

Anyhow, the next idea is my idea and my step-cuz and I already talked about it like practically all night last night. We are planning a road trip to California. So far, not set in stone but planned is:

A day in Colorado snowboarding, a day AND night in Death Valley camping, A Day in Las Vegas, then we shoot straight to SoCal first, visiting Long Beach, San Diego, Los Angeles, The Salton Sea, etc.. then we go North to go snowboarding, hit Sac-Town (Sacramento), San Fransisco, and quite a few other places. We even plan to find haunted buildings and do some checking out.

Right now we're just making the plans. We have a few people to talk to about going with us. We're definitely going to do the road trip to California this summer, but right now it's just plans on how we're getting there and what we're doing.

This is going to be the most fucking, awesomest vacation we'll ever have. I have always wanted to go on a road trip and I've finally found a perfect time for it.

 

[Munachi]

hm i just wrote a long anser but it seems to be gone. so just in one sentence - be careful not to travel with too many people. it can be stressful.

 

[EndCredits]

hm i just wrote a long anser but it seems to be gone. so just in one sentence - be careful not to travel with too many people. it can be stressful.

Only if you're with them for a long amount of time. Two weeks is too many, one is just right. And very awesome.

 

[Munachi]

true, i guess for up to a week a bigger group can be okay, because group dynamics don't build up as much yet... though with the wrong people it might only need to be a group of three, and a journey of four days, and after that you never want to speak to them again, hehe.

anyway, for me, anything longer than a week or two, i guess i'd travel with one other person at the most (and one i know i am close to and get along with well), or else alone... for a long time traveling alone was really what i liked best, though lately i noticed that at times i would like to have someone else there. best i'd have liked to have a bf to travel with (or in that case, as i missed him - have a specific boy traveling with me)... difficult too, i know, some relationships ended this way. but then again, i guess it is also a good test of the relationship...

 

[BXGemini20]

Anybody else gearing up for FInals? I know I am. *sighs* Can't wait for break now. Whew!