What are you looking for?

[James Blandings]

i voted for "someone to play with" because i'm not sure i'm ready for any kind of commitment yet... i'm still new to all this, still learning, and still in awe of the feelings i'm having. i want to spread my wings and fly some more, before getting serious and settling down with 1 person... i don't know what i want yet!
i'd like to thank cym for including me in her post earlier.. what an honor to be mentioned in 1 of her posts!! i am having some difficulties right now, but i will NOT let them get me down,i will survive, and come back from it better and more knowledgeable!!

Sierra, I am sorry you are having difficulties but you never know, maybe somebody reading this likes to play and doesnt live that far from you...

 

[cymbidia]

you never know, maybe somebody reading this likes to play and doesnt live that far from you...

Hmmm...
Gosh...
Gee...
Now let me think...
Where does sierra live?
Where does James live?

Why...why... why...geezus gods - you're both in the same state!!!!!!

Who would have guessed?

 

[WillowPuss]

giggling @ cym ... are you being a naughty girl cym? You know what naughty girls get?



mg5 ...
(((hugs)))

 

[cymbidia]

In truth I am not sure how much further I can realistically go. I have had serious offers, but I am married. My husband has no inclination of persuing this with me so I am at a stand still.

I am so very sorry for your dilemma, redelicious. There are so many like you, too, on all sides of the equation. We marry before we know who we really are, sometimes, before our real selves have unfolded. And then there's kids and houses and cars and in-laws and we feel trapped. We love our lives and our familes and we'd never ever want to lose them or want anything bad to happen to them...

...but we ache for that undefinable more that slips further away every time we look out our dining room window at another fall coming round.

I know how it feel, redelicious.
I am sorry.

 

[redelicious]

I am so very sorry for your dilemma, redelicious. There are so many like you, too, on all sides of the equation. We marry before we know who we really are, sometimes, before our real selves have unfolded. And then there's kids and houses and cars and in-laws and we feel trapped. We love our lives and our familes and we'd never ever want to lose them or want anything bad to happen to them...

...but we ache for that undefinable more that slips further away every time we look out our dining room window at another fall coming round.

I know how it feel, redelicious.
I am sorry.

Sigh


Thank you Cymbidia

 

[SierraMoon]

Hmmm...
Gosh...
Gee...
Now let me think...
Where does sierra live?
Where does James live?

Why...why... why...geezus gods - you're both in the same state!!!!!!

Who would have guessed?

hmmmmm.... not me... lol.. but i'm way out in the boonies!!!

 

[A Desert Rose]

demographics

I am sure, WriterDom, that to a certain degree, you are aware of the board demographics that can be drawn from your poll.

Rose

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: demographics

I am sure, WriterDom, that to a certain degree, you are aware of the board demographics that can be drawn from your poll.

Rose

Demographics....now you're talkin' my language, ADR!

32 responses to date might be what, 30% of the active posting user base here? Whatever....it's likely a meaningful sample.

Nearly half report they have what they want already.

Then there's two other meaningful chunks of data, 21% looking for a D, 14% looking for an s.

So maybe 4 D's in the sample....extrapolates to maybe 8 straight D guys on the Board out of a pool of several hundred users/readers.

Mostly married/attached women here, which, given a median age of likely over 35, accounts for the tone here as well as the response to my "Oprah" digs.

Given that 46% of poll respondents say they have what they want, I'd anticipate fewer pain and pity posts, but that's likely the Coffee Klatch factor at play.

But it's hard to know for sure.

Cheers
Lance

 

[Desdemona]

I'm out of town and using a borrowed computer which, for some reason, won't let me post to the poll. Add me to the looking for a Dom list.

Lance, babe, I'm over 35 and I haven't responded to your Oprah digs.

 

[A Desert Rose]

Re: Re: demographics

Demographics....now you're talkin' my language, ADR!

32 responses to date might be what, 30% of the active posting user base here? Whatever....it's likely a meaningful sample.

Nearly half report they have what they want already.

Then there's two other meaningful chunks of data, 21% looking for a D, 14% looking for an s.

So maybe 4 D's in the sample....extrapolates to maybe 8 straight D guys on the Board out of a pool of several hundred users/readers.

Mostly married/attached women here, which, given a median age of likely over 35, accounts for the tone here as well as the response to my "Oprah" digs.

Given that 46% of poll respondents say they have what they want, I'd anticipate fewer pain and pity posts, but that's likely the Coffee Klatch factor at play.

But it's hard to know for sure.

Cheers
Lance

To begin with, I agree with Des: I've not responded nor been bothered by your Oprah digs. And as you know, I am over 35, too. Could be because those digs do not pertain to me, so I ignore them.

Secondly, I thank you for breaking down those numbers. I chose not to do that, but instead allow the board members to figure it out for themselves if they were curious or interested enough to do so.

Also, it is hard to be exacting in those numbers, although a rough demographic can be drawn from them, as you have demonstrated. I knew that if I tried to illustrate the same type of conclusions that you, Lance have done, I would be drawn and quartered at this forum for attempting to do so.


Rose

 

[TantaLiza]

I can't log in to post either so....I have a playmate, just don't get to play very often...time and distance can wreck havoc! Have to admit that I wouldn't mind something a bit closer to a more permenant solution but I'm living life day to day....no pressure. Besides, at 36, if it ain't happened yet I'm sure it won't kill me...

Liza

 

[Verypowerful]

I was not really looking, but now I am on my journey with s nevertheless *smile*.

VP

 

[spankableBelle]

Well, my original vote was for 'one Dom/me to treasure', however, i am hoping that soon i can change that...

 

[cymbidia]

Well, my original vote was for 'one Dom/me to treasure', however, i am hoping that soon i can change that...

What?
You want two of 'em now?
Three?

I say--go for it, girl!
The rest of us will be looking on with awe.

 

[spankableBelle]

What?
You want two of 'em now?
Three?

I say--go for it, girl!
The rest of us will be looking on with awe.

<giggling> i just wanna amend the original vote from want One to have One...

 

[redelicious]

<giggling> i just wanna amend the original vote from want One to have One...

That is great news Belle.

 

[WillowPuss]

<giggling> i just wanna amend the original vote from want One to have One...

wooohooooooo!!!

wonderful!


(And when you are ready to share (details, that is) we will be right there ... )

 

[spankableBelle]

That is great news Belle.

~smile~ red, you are such a doll...so sweet, with a spirit full of beauty and warmth...

 

[spankableBelle]

wooohooooooo!!!

wonderful!


(And when you are ready to share (details, that is) we will be right there ... )

<giggles> uh huh...

When and if i receive permission...

 

[Persephone36]

Okay, I'll cast my voice into the fray...

I want that one special person where we can commit to sharing our lives together.

In the meantime though, lol, I'm okay with dating.

As far as particularly looking for a Dom...I don't know that I'd really ever do that. Besides, I don't necessarily know I'm a sub or just someone who likes their sex mixed between the 'nilla and the kinky. Leaning a bit more into the kinky side of things. Someone open to exploring the boundaries of their sexuality -- yep, that I could work with.

I don't want to close off to someone because they don't present themselves to me in a package I recognize right off the bat. I think it's a good sign if I start to feel panicky because my tendency to want control, over everything, including the image in my head of who I should be with, is being challenged. Or because we don't match up perfectly. A real person is a 1000 times more exciting then someone I can predict and that feels safe out of familiarity. I've done safe. I've done sooo safe that I've avoided getting involved at all at times. I don't want to do safe anymore. Now the safe that comes from being with someone who can take me to the borders of my sexuality -- that trust, now that's something that's truly exciting.

But you know, sex is just one spoke of the wheel. Although I do think it's important to have that spark and chemistry. But comfortable companionship, similar goals in life, mutual respect and admiration, shared interests, being able to make each other laugh, minds that rev each other up, love -- the enduring kind, not just the infatuation of "I'm in love" -- the love of "I will stand by you and take care of you no matter what life hands us" kind -- they're all a part of the whole picture.

One thing I know I'm not capable of doing is settling. I know I want the whole magilla. I want someone who makes me wildly happy. I think I deserve that. But I think that just doesn't *happen* -- ka-bang! -- necessarily. Relationships take a lot of work. They're not always fun -- but it's the work and the effort that pays off.

Oh, one more thing -- he's got to like cats.

*I'd better bookmark this so I'll know where it is if I need to turn it into an ad, lol. It's pretty much there, isn't it?"*

LOL

P.

 

[morninggirl5]

I think/hope/pray i need to change my vote.

I have a Possibility. I have an Opportunity. I have a Chance.


What more can we really ask for?

I was wrong, my vote remains the same.

I'm still not sure what it was, but i've discovered that it wasn't what i believed.

 

[redelicious]

I was wrong, my vote remains the same.

I'm still not sure what it was, but i've discovered that it wasn't what i believed.

I am so sorry to hear that, even though I don't know you. I hope you find what you are looking for.

 

[morninggirl5]

Thank you redelicious.

The search continues. A little wiser, this time. Probably a little more cautiously, as well.

 

[Desdemona]

MG, good luck as your search continues. You aren't alone, if that's any comfort.

 

[Persephone36]

MG, good luck as your search continues. You aren't alone, if that's any comfort.

mg -- I ditto what Des said. I wish for you that this had turned out to be what you wanted. But, it may be hard to hear this now (or you may already realize it) -- it's what someone wise just told me -- you're one step closer to what you want. In fact, you're one *giant* step closer. All the best.

Perse