What made you smile or laugh today? Part IV

[seela]

View attachment 2169589

Yup.

 

[Acktion]

https://qph.cf2.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-fce49097cedc7ad3d4417dc5c689ecda

 

[muddler35]

Phone pocket dials same friend for the umpteenth time. She is cooking. Her son comes in with her phone.

Son: Muddler is calling you
Friend: It’s just his butt. It does that a lot
Son gives her a funny look for a moment: Idiot

To everyone else my phone has called this week, I apologize. Amber, you’re just gonna have to accept it guess.

 

[Acktion]

Yet another spam email to help me "stop disappointing in bed."

I'll be the first to admit I have a lot of flaws. And a whole lot of things that I'm not that good at. (Granted, most of 'em are because I frankly don't care enough to try to be. But, still...)

But, trying to tell me diddly about diddling?

https://media.tenor.co/images/d679976a958ebeabd874efeec3298aa3/tenor.gif

 

[AngelWithAShotgun]

Walking in on my parents arguing over how to pronounce Example.

Dad: See! *plays google result* Eggsampol
Mom: I don’t care, my teacher said its eXample

Dad: *looks at me by the time I realised it was too late to hide* What do you think?

Me: I think it's Example
Dad: *hears eggs* See! See!

Me:
No, I said EXample
*promptly points at mom*
She taught me
Although it (his pronunciation) would explain why the abbreviation is eg.

At this point, both parents agreed and I took my cue and ran

 

[IrisAlthea]

Funny work mail!

He: I need [crazy long list] for my project.
Iris: …and a partridge in a pear tree?
He: So a prioritized list then?
Iris: unless you have a rich ”uncle” willing to sponsor us or Pippi Longstocking’s bag of gold coins - yes.
He: I’ll put those on the list too then?

 

[Bramblethorn]

Woke up to hear the cat in the process of horking up a great big hairball, managed to save the laptop by catching it with my hands ew ew ew.

Hopefully that's the grossest thing I have to deal with today.

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

Realizing I've forgotten how to flirt

Would you like some help with that? I mean, its a shame when a beautiful woman can't have a little innocent fun.

(How was that?)

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

The Foo Fighters:

Foo Fighters

You've been Rick Rolled, LIVE at a Foo Fighters Concert

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

Really good!

Teach me your ways

(Brace yourself).

I have a better idea: you must have as much to teach as you have to learn. We can teach each other (FTW)

 

[bob53]

Doc Johnson recycling toys:
https://apnews.com/article/fashion-toys-4da11f08d1ad48b773ff8a95655b64b1

 

[seela]

I went to an outdoors cinema yesterday and they showed the movie on film with a break when they had to change the reel. I’ve never experienced that before.

It was such a nice, warm evening and the quaint 35mm film in a courtyard was just the cherry on top.

 

[melimelissa]

sometimes, no words are
needed really to tell the
story that unfolds

Méli


https://i.imgur.com/s6j0nys.png

https://i.imgur.com/K7B8xJq.png

 

[twister947]

One of the cats is holding out for fresh kibbles. If I can eat leftovers, so can she.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Actual footage of a new female Literotica forum poster checking her private messages:

https://twitter.com/x/status/1559904145704124422

 

[Wonderer67]

This made my wife cry, but made me smile.

It rained for the first time in weeks last night. She was so overcome with joy that she started crying. We got up and went out in it. it was about 11pm
And it just felt good to get wet and be in the rain. We’ve had less than an inch of rain since June and we got 3/4 of an inch last night.

We’re new farmers (2nd year owning a farm) and our crops pretty much got detroyed by this drought. All of our pumpkins and gourds are already dead, but the the corn, sunflowers, potatoes and tomatoes and peppers will return about 50% of what we got last year.

We just needed this rain so badly. Ground has been super dry and our plants needed it all.

 

[twister947]

Finland's PM.

You go, lady.

 

[Bramblethorn]

This story:

https://twitter.com/x/status/1561349585397862400

 

[seela]

A friend sending a pic of her wearing the nipple shield thing I crocheted.

It was supposed to become a coaster, but because I suck at crocheting, it ended up being weirdly conical in the middle, so it’s a nipple shield instead. I wish I could make another.

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

A guy in AmPics who replied to a thread from 2008. I wonder if he PM'd the OP as well

ETA: It must be a full moon or Mercury in retrograde. It happened here too. At least the second poster here noticed...

 

[BiBunny]

A friend sending a pic of her wearing the nipple shield thing I crocheted.

It was supposed to become a coaster, but because I suck at crocheting, it ended up being weirdly conical in the middle, so it’s a nipple shield instead. I wish I could make another.

So here's the thing: It's not so much that you suck at crocheting as crochet can make unintended shapes if your tension is a bit tight or if the pattern is not designed exactly correctly (or both). Things that are supposed to be round easily become pointy in the middle if something is a little off. So it's probably not really you, lol.

I struggle with this a lot. I have a tendency to pull everything tight as hell. My circles don't lay flat, either.

 

[seela]

So here's the thing: It's not so much that you suck at crocheting as crochet can make unintended shapes if your tension is a bit tight or if the pattern is not designed exactly correctly (or both). Things that are supposed to be round easily become pointy in the middle if something is a little off. So it's probably not really you, lol.

I struggle with this a lot. I have a tendency to pull everything tight as hell. My circles don't lay flat, either.

Oh thank you, but it most certainly was me. I didn’t know how to count and add the extra loops in correct intervals and places, so eventually I just gave up and tried to wing it and that was definitely not the right thing to do.

It was made of plastic because it was supposed to be ironed to make it a hard, lacey coaster. But mine was and is a holey (but definitely not lacey) nipple shield.

 

[AngelWithAShotgun]

Oh thank you, but it most certainly was me. I didn’t know how to count and add the extra loops in correct intervals and places, so eventually I just gave up and tried to wing it and that was definitely not the right thing to do.

It was made of plastic because it was supposed to be ironed to make it a hard, lacey coaster. But mine was and is a holey (but definitely not lacey) nipple shield.

Hey you're doing better than I did, I only ever made a straight line. And then my cousin had to redo it because it either too tight or too loose and had random knots that weren't meant to be there

 

[seela]

Hey you're doing better than I did, I only ever made a straight line. And then my cousin had to redo it because it either too tight or too loose and had random knots that weren't meant to be there

Yup, I do the loose/tight thing too. I’m really bad at that type of things, always have been. I’m also infinitely jealous of those who can knit and crochet.

All my crocheting attempts so far:

1) In school, I had to crochet a potholder. It got so misshapen that my teacher labeled it as a teddy bear’s hat. I was 7 or 8. I decided that crocheting isn’t my thing and chose to take wood and metal work classes instead of textile work and learned how weld and stuff over the grades 3-9.

2) Around 12 years ago I made another potholder, just to see if my teddy bear trauma could be overcome. The potholder turned out wonky and kind of full of holes, but with a bit of squinting you could tell it was a potholder. I showed it to mom, who laughed and then hung it in a visible place in her kitchen like parents do with kids’ drawings. My aunt visited her and went “aww, so nice that [my nephew’s name] is learning to crochet.” Nephew at the time was 9, and my potholder really did look like it was made by a nine year old.

3) Another attempt at a potholder a few months after attempt #2. This time it turned out amazing (for having been made by me). Square, I improvised sort of a fringe around the edges, and I embroidered a lithium atom on it, because why not. It took so much effort and concentration to get it done but I was determined. I still have it somewhere.

Because #3 was such a success, I decided that I can crochet now, time to do different things with my life and didn’t crochet at all for 11+ years, until I made the nipple shield. Probably should have stuck with a potholder.

 

[twister947]

An opportunity to "pay it forward ".