Why are many Literotica poems so vague?

[Du Lac]

that makes two of us.. thank you Jim
du lac

 

[My Erotic Tale]

Re: Lesser more or less

I once read a poet who stated that the perfect poem is wordless. I was inspired and tried to write about the perfect poem. NOTE: I am writing about the perfect poem, not saying that this is the perfect poem.


A Perfect Poem

Spoken in wordless space, the soul empirical
a product of the times, a voice screamed
at the night, at the dark, at the cold, cold heart

the world, a country in debris, a whimper
of words between the words, imagined -- divined
then etched into the limbs, the steaming skin

a bone deep, searing burn in comfort
the forgotten horror suddenly recalled
memory of love and the knife-twist betrayal.

Yet a verse of water in parched sun, desert days
the flash of life, happy, content before dying eyes
a breathless moan, a lovers eyes -- as one

rhythm of waves, of wings, of naked flesh
the silence of dark, of an instant before death
and life on a string, careless and carefree.

A rhyme not read or written, not remembered
the minutes and hours, the bead of sweat dangling
in a single, vast impossibility -- suddenly possible.

Word, after word, following word and line
the same somehow different, shapeless form
one final breath, inhaled then whispered…



Vag... ah, complex enough?


jim : )

a head scratcher and also a
chin tapper, a vague poem
yet filling~
so less is more?
more or less?

looks at sack and the
disecting scissors <grin>
flock of a feather I swell~
is the badger lesser?
or in search for the perfect poem?

 

[Liar]

Re: Re: Re: Not to interrupt the philosophy but...

The less lesser is the more, more or less.

Hell yeah, now we're talking.

I have no idea what we're saying anymore, but talking we are.

#L

 

[WickedEve]

I'm feeling old and confused and I want sex and coffee. So, what do I write? Do I write complex poetry that's vague or poetry vague enough to be complex and brilliant? Sex and coffee can be complex, but can it be vague enough? What if I write it vague and the damn reader doesn't perceive it as vague? Will it cease to be complex? Can I slap him? Is that action too vague to get the point across? I need sex and coffee.

 

[BooMerengue]

drink the coffee, read the dregs, and write

it'll be mysteriously brilliant

 

[WickedEve]

drink the coffee, read the dregs, and write

it'll be mysteriously brilliant

I'm working on a vague masterpiece right now.

 

[sack]

my new not so vague poem....

Should be appearing in a few days. Inspired by the many thought-provoking responses to this thread, it's called "After The Tsunami". Keep your eyes peeled....


PS- Eve, Happy Birthday, gorgeous!



Sack

 

[seranade]

sexy

I'm feeling old and confused and I want sex and coffee. So, what do I write? Do I write complex poetry that's vague or poetry vague enough to be complex and brilliant? Sex and coffee can be complex, but can it be vague enough? What if I write it vague and the damn reader doesn't perceive it as vague? Will it cease to be complex? Can I slap him? Is that action too vague to get the point across? I need sex and coffee.

oh that was sexy
so complex wrapped in passionate questions
okay,
I'm a tad confussed or perhaps not
a certain famed commenter
doesn't understand vague poetry
and has ascended to a level to
calling others lesser and befriended
by vague perfect poem?

I liked the perfect poem
and mistletoe could use tweeked
but not to the extent to call it vag!
perhaps I need slapped (please)
but the signifigance of using mistletoe
as an example was poorly chosen

thanks for the heads up tail

 

[WickedEve]

Re: sexy

but not to the extent to call it vag!

Vag? lol That's what all the cool people now call it. "We're writing vag, now. "

 

[WickedEve]

I'm a vagger.

 

[My Erotic Tale]

hey L~

seranade me a song piano man~
no frets
creaks in the wood
not a witches brew a bubble
scrabble
concentration
and jingle...<grin>
minced words and cold slaw
in a key of B#
catch ya on the flip~ (L~)

oh that was sexy
so complex wrapped in passionate questions
okay,
I'm a tad confussed or perhaps not
a certain famed commenter
doesn't understand vague poetry
and has ascended to a level to
calling others lesser and befriended
by vague perfect poem?

I liked the perfect poem
and mistletoe could use tweeked
but not to the extent to call it vag!
perhaps I need slapped (please)
but the signifigance of using mistletoe
as an example was poorly chosen

thanks for the heads up tail

 

[sack]

Seranade's new poem.....(Winter Butterflies)

Now, this is a puzzle! I thought for sure the winter butterflies were synonymous with "snow". But toward the end the poet states the butterflies are "snowflake sized" which means they can't be the snow itself. So what are they? Angel dandruff? Hmmmmm..

 

[WickedEve]

Re: Seranade's new poem.....(Winter Butterflies)

Now, this is a puzzle! I thought for sure the winter butterflies were synonymous with "snow". But toward the end the poet states the butterflies are "snowflake sized" which means they can't be the snow itself. So what are they? Angel dandruff? Hmmmmm..

I'm sure I read that poem, and now I have to read it again to see what you're talking about. Angel dandruff is rather cool image. (That's why they wear white.)

 

[WickedEve]

I thought they were snowflakes. I read it again and I think it's snowflakes.

 

[sack]

It's those darn last two words that threw me off...

"The Blending". IF winter butterflies are the snow, what is the snow blending with? If winter butterflies are not the snow, they could blend with the snow, IF they were white, which is why I asked that in the public comment. Seranade, where are you?


Sack

 

[seranade]

Re: Seranade's new poem.....(Winter Butterflies)

Now, this is a puzzle! I thought for sure the winter butterflies were synonymous with "snow". But toward the end the poet states the butterflies are "snowflake sized" which means they can't be the snow itself. So what are they? Angel dandruff? Hmmmmm..

wicked could vag me anytime~

sack well gee. I don't know wicked you lost any dandruff?
it's a downfall of snowflakes, you really shouldn't
comment if your having such a hard time with poetry
perhaps it's not your...farta'

okay sensei
I'll keep it nice

sack I'm curious as to why you chose such
a non vague poem to create a thread on vague
this is so vague it's humorous,
perhaps it's the comment section your opposed to?
go figure a snowflake and can't figure one out?
perhaps my ramblings burr cut your hair?
and if you have a problem with the tail?
you will fail~ for this honorable man
inspires and encourages others
not riddle others poetry
or condescending in anyway
your butter won't slide with me.

bows

 

[WickedEve]

Re: Re: Seranade's new poem.....(Winter Butterflies)

wicked could vag me anytime~

sack well gee. I don't know wicked you lost any dandruff?
it's a downfall of snowflakes, you really shouldn't
comment if your having such a hard time with poetry
perhaps it's not your...farta'

okay sensei
I'll keep it nice

sack I'm curious as to why you chose such
a non vague poem to create a thread on vague
this is so vague it's humorous,
perhaps it's the comment section your opposed to?
go figure a snowflake and can't figure one out?
perhaps my ramblings burr cut your hair?
and if you have a problem with the tail?
you will fail~ for this honorable man
inspires and encourages others
not riddle others poetry
or condescending in anyway
your butter won't slide with me.

bows

So, it's a snowflake? Actually, calling a snowflake a winter butterfly is wonderful. I read it a few more times, and I considered what sack said about blending. And for a moment, I thought that possibly winter butterflies really were butterflies out in the snow, blending with the flakes, which is a lovely image, too. Either way, it works.

 

[seranade]

thanks

I thought they were snowflakes. I read it again and I think it's snowflakes.

thank god for wicked people
thank you wickedeve

the blending
would be snow blending with snow

really sack your not very good at this are you?

 

[seranade]

Re: Re: Re: Seranade's new poem.....(Winter Butterflies)

So, it's a snowflake? Actually, calling a snowflake a winter butterfly is wonderful. I read it a few more times, and I considered what sack said about blending. And for a moment, I thought that possibly winter butterflies really were butterflies out in the snow, blending with the flakes, which is a lovely image, too. Either way, it works.

okay then it's perception in the eye of the
reader?
it's a poem about snowflakes
falling to their destiny
thank you for the review

so how wicked are you?
shall I play
in a transindental lay?

 

[WickedEve]

Re: thanks

thank god for wicked people
thank you wickedeve

the blending
would be snow blending with snow

really sack your not very good at this are you?

Yes, I thought that too. Simply, snow blending with snow.
I really like the poem. But I can understand how a reader may have had a moment of confusion. If you simply read it and move on, you get it. But if a reader takes time to really think about it, then he may have questions. Actually, you're lucky that sack put so much effort into your poem. I love those kind of readers. I love the questions. I like talking about my poetry, and I also like finding out how the reader connected with my words.

 

[sack]

now wait a minute Seranade,

If the winter butterflies are snowflakes, why did you say they were "snowflake sized" . Of course, snow itself would be "snowflake sized", there would be no need to state that...so I'm confused. I can comment on anything I want to without understanding all of it....do you feel people need to obtain Masters degrees to make PC's? As to Tale being honorable, he wrote a poem about me which accuses me of leaving nasty comments. That isn't even true, my comments may be questioning, strong, or what the person doesn't want to hear, but never nasty. That implies malice, which is what I'm not. Tale is dead wrong here! I still feel Mistletoe fits rather nicely the definition of a vague poem. Tale does this on purpose of course, he thinks we are all mind readers and can fill in the details he glosses over or deliberately leaves out. His comments were never encouraging to my stories....as a matter of fact they were so generic, they could apply to any story, so I asked him to stop leaving them. At some point being too general says absolutely nothing, and doesn't help a writer at all. This is what Tale does, bouquets of pleasantries which are easy on the ear and mind. Except for my poem of course, which is the other extreme. But that effort is far better than Mistletoe, so I am pleased to be part of its creation.


Sack

 

[seranade]

Re: Re: thanks

Yes, I thought that too. Simply, snow blending with snow.
I really like the poem. But I can understand how a reader may have had a moment of confusion. If you simply read it and move on, you get it. But if a reader takes time to really think about it, then he may have questions. Actually, you're lucky that sack put so much effort into your poem. I love those kind of readers. I love the questions. I like talking about my poetry, and I also like finding out how the reader connected with my words.

okay,
I can play nice
thanks sack for the comment

gonna swim through this list of poems
by the wickedeve
but not this night, good night
good night ladies good night ladies
good night ladies I hope you sleep so well

 

[WickedEve]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Seranade's new poem.....(Winter Butterflies)

so how wicked are you?
shall I play
in a transindental lay?

Only so-so wicked, but I'm working on becoming immensely wicked.
Did you read the poem or just see the title in my signature line?

 

[seranade]

Re: now wait a minute Seranade,

If the winter butterflies are snowflakes, why did you say they were "snowflake sized" . Of course, snow itself would be "snowflake sized", there would be no need to state that...so I'm confused. I can comment on anything I want to without understanding all of it....do you feel people need to obtain Masters degrees to make PC's? As to Tale being honorable, he wrote a poem about me which accuses me of leaving nasty comments. That isn't even true, my comments may be questioning, strong, or what the person doesn't want to hear, but never nasty. That implies malice, which is what I'm not. Tale is dead wrong here! I still feel Mistletoe fits rather nicely the definition of a vague poem. Tale does this on purpose of course, he thinks we are all mind readers and can fill in the details he glosses over or deliberately leaves out. His comments were never enouraging to my stories....as a matter of fact they were so generic, they could apply to any story, so I asked him to stop leaving them. At some point being too general says absolutely nothing, and doesn't help a writer at all. This is what Tale does, bouquets of pleasantries which are easy on the ear and mind. Except for my poem of course, which is the other extreme. But that effort is far better than Mistletoe, so I am pleased to be part of its creation.


Sack

okay taking notes
feathers ruffle easy
don't wite vague
don't mention snowflakes when
writing about snowflakes
and sack
I assure you Art has no malice
he feels sorry for your confussion in life in general
he's just to nice to say it, he encourages everyone
he's one of the greatest men in this community
so don't taunt the tail

 

[seranade]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Seranade's new poem.....(Winter Butterflies)

Only so-so wicked, but I'm working on becoming immensely wicked.
Did you read the poem or just see the title in my signature line?

I like so-so
I saw the link in your siggy
but will delight in the reads I'm sure
on that note I'll have to read it first
smiling
all the way to slumber