Why so many cuckhold stories?

[Goldeniangel]

Oh! Yes, I was saying that IF it's put into a different category other than LW then I would make sure to put an author's note at the beginning of the story to warn readers. Although, I don't think I've personally ever had a cheating story that wasn't in the LW category, but I've seen other authors who have done that and I've always appreciated that they made a note of it to give me a warning, as it were.

I never look at the tags so even though they'd probably be helpful in that area they completely bypass me.

 

[sr71plt]

I must admit I rarely look at the tags either. As others note, for selection, they are pretty useless where they are now placed--on the last page of the story, rather than the first.

 

[MichaelinChina]

Loving Wives is such a misnomer.
I debated over where I should post my latest story. (see below..lol a blatant plug!)

The woman in my story is cheating on her husband; a Loving Wife? Not!

Or does it mean "Loving someone else's Wife'?
And incidentally, don't men cheat too? So why omit them? I'm sure there are stories that could be written by cheating men.


So, anyway, I put it in Erotic Couplings, because that title is sufficiently ambiguous to allow a story about a cheating wife. Not realising (from the above comments) that some readers are shocked to see such stories there.

Maybe there needs, given the huge number of stories in the cheating wives genre, to have a Cheating Wives (Cheating Partners) section.
Simple.

MiC

 

[MichaelinChina]

cuckhold, chuckhold, cockhold or is it Chuck's hold on cock?

It's 'cuckold' for the record.

 

[sr71plt]

Maybe there needs, given the huge number of stories in the cheating wives genre, to have a Cheating Wives (Cheating Partners) section.
Simple.

It's been suggested only about thirty million times on the forum--which have all been a waste of effort.

 

[AdjectiveNounVerb]

I must admit I rarely look at the tags either. As others note, for selection, they are pretty useless where they are now placed--on the last page of the story, rather than the first.

I actually do try to use tags to find stories, via Search and the Tags Portal. There's actually an even bigger limitation to their usefulness in finding stories if you ask me: only the author can tag a story. Some authors don't tag their stories. Some authors posted their stories before Lit added tags and either can't or won't go back and tag now. And some authors just do a horrible job tagging, picking tags that are uninformative or are random phrases from the story.

 

[estragon]

I have found tags are useless. As has been pointed out, they're in the wrong place, and idiosyncratic, so that they're often misleading.

 

[MichaelinChina]

It's been suggested only about thirty million times on the forum--which have all been a waste of effort.

Then why aren't they taking notice and doing something about it?
30 million lit members can't be wrong.

 

[sr71plt]

Then why aren't they taking notice and doing something about it?
30 million lit members can't be wrong.

Why don't you ask them rather than me? (which is the basic fallacy in your question)

They don't the read forums much if at all and perhaps it's also because they think it's fine the way it is and don't care what others think.

 

[sr71plt]

Some authors posted their stories before Lit added tags

I don't think Lit. did anything about the tags that could be used other than banning a few. I think tags are entirely created by authors and thus are pretty much limitless in words that can be used.

 

[utty]

I am a bit leery of getting involved in this discussion but I do find it interesting and puzzling. I am not judging in any way but why do cuckold stories upset so many people? To me it falls in the category of BDSM or mind control and dominance etc. Unless I am missing something I thought these were commonly accepted themes. Again I am not judging. I am just trying to understand. I have a wickedly dirty mind and I love stories about control and reluctance or even non consent but in real life I am very much so against this sort of behavior unless it is role playing. If that makes any sense. In the realm of fantasy the boundaries are blurry compared to real life applications of acceptable behavior. I don't mean to be Captain Obvious either. I am just trying to figure out why I see editors saying things like they will not edit cuckold stories etc. Is there something more to cuckold stories than I am grasping here? Do they get particularly misogynistic or something? I am new to this term.

 

[sr71plt]

I am a bit leery of getting involved in this discussion but I do find it interesting and puzzling. I am not judging in any way but why do cuckold stories upset so many people?

Sorry to say that most of those who are upset are folks who want the website tailored to their own interests and can't abide others writing and reading what they want as long as they are permitted to do it themselves.

I think the core of the upset here, though, is what is really the misnaming of the category these are posted to. You have to really do contortions (which I do in the stories I've posted to Loving Wives--from the enjoyment of the challenge) to equate cuckold with "loving wife."

 

[utty]

Thank you for your reply sr71.

As a new writer I will have to grow a very thick skin in order to keep on going. I can see where my stories could offend because most if not all are going to be about non consent or reluctance. It gets me off so that's what I focus on. Hopefully I will find others who enjoy the same fantasies I do.

But I agree, it is easy hit the back button on a story I don't like and I often do. I have to work to find that story that gets me in the right mood. = )

I wonder what kind of grief Ann Rice got for her novels?

 

[MichaelinChina]

I, too, had a vague understanding of the term 'cuckold'. I recall one of John Irving's novels - was it Water Method Man or 158 Pound Marriage - that dealt with the term/phenomenon. That was years ago, maybe in the 80s.

So to be sure I went to Google.and found this intro to the term provided by Wikipedia:

"Cuckold historically referred to a man with an adulterous wife. It has largely fallen out of use in modern English with the decline of marital infidelity in pop culture ..."

For now that serves our purpose - a definition, so everyone can be on the same page.
And yes, it coincided with my understanding.
Maybe someone can make the link between the assumed non-handling of cuckold stories by editors at Lit and the socalled 'decline of marital infidelity in pop culture' - something I find hard to believe.
Pop culture suddenly ignores infidelity?
Has infidelity disappeared? Those are rhetorical questions by the way - nothing to do with any ' basic fallacy in my questions' - and as such they are up for discussion, not a direct question to anyone in particular.
Misogyny raises further interesting tangents. Conspiracy theories about editors anybody?

 

[MichaelinChina]

Sorry to say that most of those who are upset are folks who want the website tailored to their own interests and can't abide others writing and reading what they want as long as they are permitted to do it themselves.

I think the core of the upset here, though, is what is really the misnaming of the category these are posted to. You have to really do contortions (which I do in the stories I've posted to Loving Wives--from the enjoyment of the challenge) to equate cuckold with "loving wife."

Thanks for that clear explanation of the chief issue.
But see the definition of cuckold as the term for the man - not the woman.
Or maybe I am not comprehending your sentence well enough. (maybe if I take out the bracketed bit)..yes ok, ...hmmm..over to you..

 

[MichaelinChina]

Rather than go back and edit my last post - I'll make this a PS.

Let me say that if I read 'between the lines' of the last part of your post, I understand your point and agree with you.

 

[sr71plt]

Thanks for that clear explanation of the chief issue.
But see the definition of cuckold as the term for the man - not the woman.
Or maybe I am not comprehending your sentence well enough. (maybe if I take out the bracketed bit)..yes ok, ...hmmm..over to you..

The definition is for the woman being disloyal to the man (the cuckold)--and therefore not much of a loving wife--so I don't understand the problem.

 

[BTTap]

Loving Wives is such a misnomer.
I debated over where I should post my latest story. (see below..lol a blatant plug!)

The woman in my story is cheating on her husband; a Loving Wife? Not!

Or does it mean "Loving someone else's Wife'?
And incidentally, don't men cheat too? So why omit them? I'm sure there are stories that could be written by cheating men.


So, anyway, I put it in Erotic Couplings, because that title is sufficiently ambiguous to allow a story about a cheating wife. Not realising (from the above comments) that some readers are shocked to see such stories there.

Maybe there needs, given the huge number of stories in the cheating wives genre, to have a Cheating Wives (Cheating Partners) section.
Simple.

MiC

Having a "cheating wife" category wouldn't solve the problem of the balkinization of the category-it would merely shift it. LW would (presumably) become the Romance or EC (or other) category, but featuring a non-cheating wife and husband. "Cheating wife" would continue to have 2 major, and very diametrically opposed, subcategories: willing/reluctant cuckold stories (eroticised cheating wife); and unwilling cuckold stories (frequently reading like whodunnits, and sometimes featuring revenge, or at least divorce).

 

[sr71plt]

I agree. Just as the website (within bounds) permits authors to write what they want and readers to read what they want, they permit readers to comment as they like (while giving authors the power to erase the comments). People write what they do to the Loving Wives category because they want to. There's a lot of such stories here because a lot of authors want to write them. Readers read the stories either because they like to read that sort of stuff or because they like to rant on that sort of stuff. That's how the world turns here.

 

[MichaelinChina]

It's been suggested only about thirty million times on the forum--which have all been a waste of effort.

I had a longer post that I lost because I got logged out.
And which I won't bother trying to rewrite.
Because essentially this issue (and the thread) is a waste of time.
As you state, it's a waste of effort trying to change the category.
because noone in charge reads the threads.
So it's the chattering classes letting off steam about their pet whinge.

Isn't there a space on Lit to make suggestions? To improve the site?
Maybe that's the place to go instead of here and have as many people as possible petition for changes.
Not much else one can do is there?

OK I'm unsubscribing and finally getting the chance to go look at some Delicious Derrieres.
Take my advice and do something else with your valuable time.
Peace
MiC

 

[AdjectiveNounVerb]

I am a bit leery of getting involved in this discussion but I do find it interesting and puzzling. I am not judging in any way but why do cuckold stories upset so many people? To me it falls in the category of BDSM or mind control and dominance etc. Unless I am missing something I thought these were commonly accepted themes. Again I am not judging. I am just trying to understand. I have a wickedly dirty mind and I love stories about control and reluctance or even non consent but in real life I am very much so against this sort of behavior unless it is role playing. If that makes any sense. In the realm of fantasy the boundaries are blurry compared to real life applications of acceptable behavior. I don't mean to be Captain Obvious either. I am just trying to figure out why I see editors saying things like they will not edit cuckold stories etc. Is there something more to cuckold stories than I am grasping here? Do they get particularly misogynistic or something? I am new to this term.

Some people aren't fans of BDSM either, you know, or of mind games and domination. Or humiliation. And of course, just as the fiction can be more appealing than reality to those who have the fantasy, it can also be more revolting than reality to those who don't have the fantasy. An example: from the little I've dipped my toes into reading stories in the BDSM category, it didn't seem like consent and aftercare feature much in the stories there. Frankly, it seemed like they were just particularly brutal NonConsent stories with added doses of kidnapping, Stockhholm Syndrome, and physical disfigurement. Now I may not know much about BDSM in real life or understand its appeal to the people who do it, but I do know consent and aftercare both figure prominently in realityBDSM. That's why BDSM stories bother me in a way that BDSM in real life doesn't.

I don't think Lit. did anything about the tags that could be used other than banning a few. I think tags are entirely created by authors and thus are pretty much limitless in words that can be used.

I meant before Lit added the tag feature. If memory serves, there was no tagging back in 02 and 03. Not really sure when it started, but I first noticed it a few years ago

 

[utty]

Some people aren't fans of BDSM either, you know, or of mind games and domination. Or humiliation. And of course, just as the fiction can be more appealing than reality to those who have the fantasy, it can also be more revolting than reality to those who don't have the fantasy. An example: from the little I've dipped my toes into reading stories in the BDSM category, it didn't seem like consent and aftercare feature much in the stories there. Frankly, it seemed like they were just particularly brutal NonConsent stories with added doses of kidnapping, Stockhholm Syndrome, and physical disfigurement. Now I may not know much about BDSM in real life or understand its appeal to the people who do it, but I do know consent and aftercare both figure prominently in realityBDSM. That's why BDSM stories bother me in a way that BDSM in real life doesn't.

Well, I have to say that I have never experienced real BDSM so you're ahead of me that way! I have only fantasized. I think to actually do it would probably scare me. It would depend on the person I was with. I think I am more into BDM because I never like the spanking or any of the pain really. I just like the bondage sort of thing. So, maybe I need to get rid of them M too. But I agree, I like the ritual of withholding and then giving etc. I am not hardcore BDSM in fantasy. I mean I have seen things on the net that cause me to turn away in disgust because it's gone too far for me. For example needles in someone's nipples. But then I guess if both parties are actually role playing and consenting behind the scenes than who am I to judge?

 

[utty]

I wonder do people get upset about cheating husbands? I hope so. What I mean is I hope there isn't a double standard here. lol

 

[AdjectiveNounVerb]

Well, I have to say that I have never experienced real BDSM so you're ahead of me that way! I have only fantasized.

I have never experienced real BDSM either, I just have enough second-hand and third-hand info about it to know that the BDSM-category stories I've read aren't depicting it accurately. Haven't had any fantasies about it, either, beyond the "hold her arms up above her head and pin her with my body weight" sort of light pseudo-bondage fantasy. I'm always curious about it, though, in all the various letter combinations. Why people who aren't like me aren't like me can be fascinating.

 

[mgablea]

This is a porn site, so what's the big deal?

Loving Wives - Tales of adventurous married women & their mates.”

Seems to me the subject in the "Loving Wives" section would be about cuckold/cheating wives. What else would tales of adventerous married women be about?

What is the deal with demanding a warning? Isn't this a porn site where almost anything goes? How can you be offended?

There's alot here I don't care for but I don't demand an outline of the story before I start reading a story. When I get to a part I don't like I just skip that part and move on to another story.