Women of Lit: A Safe Place To Share

[Fullygrownbrat]

Fun side note: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun just popped up on my spotify.

 

[Klovesbooks]

Exactly, wrong on so many levels it is literally laughable!

Just another aside, have any of you seen the absolute shit show on TikTok… the “Alpha Dom” dating coach guy that reeks of incel? He’s getting absolutely dragged for his non consent message bullshit creepy behavior. But I am silently wondering why no one is mentioning how unbelievably dangerous this guy is for an impressionable young woman who might actually entertain D/s play with this garbage human being. This is the kind of person that would yank your hair wrong and break your neck. He angers me

 

[v_indigo]

Fun side note: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun just popped up on my spotify.

I mean, we definitely do.

Also, ‘She bop’

 

[Fullygrownbrat]

Just another aside, have any of you seen the absolute shit show on TikTok… the “Alpha Dom” dating coach guy that reeks of incel? He’s getting absolutely dragged for his non consent message bullshit creepy behavior. But I am silently wondering why no one is mentioning how unbelievably dangerous this guy is for an impressionable young woman who might actually entertain D/s play with this garbage human being. This is the kind of person that would yank your hair wrong and break your neck. He angers me

Yes. There is no getting through to someone like that. He's so gross and would NEVER pass vetting in a normal situation.

 

[Klovesbooks]

Yes. There is no getting through to someone like that. He's so gross and would NEVER pass vetting in a normal situation.

So true, I just worry for less experienced subs who might not know enough to see that.

 

[v_indigo]

 

[Strixaluco]

View attachment 2331249

At least it isn't about women doing it more, as men gossip just as much.

 

[Fullygrownbrat]

So true, I just worry for less experienced subs who might not know enough to see that.

A valid worry. As I have matured, I've been looking back at different relationships, and realizing some people were being a "dom" to me, and I didn't know it or realize it. Luckily, THANK GOODNESS, never in an abusive way, but looking back, I'm like...THAT MOFO!!!!

Some relationships I look back on now and I realize they were so bad because I fell into all kinds of stupid games and basic traps that I didn't understand. Things I had no way to navigate coming from a super conservative area and barely having dial up at the time. We can only hope with better access to information online, even though some of that is shit, will find those who need it.

 

[lil_jenni]

I saw a thread on here over the weekend (but can't find it now) by a guy asking if other people noticed that sexual references/behaviors were everywhere these days. Two of the examples he cited involved women's clothing (a concert pianist showing a lot of cleavage and college age women wearing revealing clothing). I was going to reply that it seemed quite likely that he was sexualizing behavior that may not have been intended to be sexual, but I knew it would be a waste of time.

But I have to confess that I have come to believe my own behavior contributes to the problem. I've been struggling with my exhibitionism, which manifests both physically (e.g., going to the store in probably inappropriate clothing intending to be noticed and sexualized) and verbally (e.g.,talking about my sexual activities here). It gives me a thrill and helps me feel better about my appearance or about my sexual appetites/thoughts. I mean, positing on here can be very therapeutic and validating... except when it isn't. I usually leave for a bit when it gets too bad, but that often leads to more physical exhibition, which has a different set of problems.

Anyway, I'm feeling particularly in need of posting here because my intrusive thoughts have been turning more and more toward sexual violence, specifically asking my husband to hurt me—I mean, really hurt me—during sex. It's not my standard humiliation/pain/non-consent thoughts that come during sex. Those can get me going or help me get over the edge to an orgasm. Or I can voice them and Hubby may or may not indulge me.

Those are not intrusive thoughts, however. The ones I am having now are. They take me out of the pleasure I'm feeling. Saturday night, they kept me from coming. Last night, I had to ask Hubby to stop because thoughts of him cutting me kept forcing everything else out, and I almost asked him to do it just to make the thoughts stop. I didn't, because not only would that have stopped the sex (which I ended up doing anyway), he would have been worried as fuck about me.

These are unusual events for me. I mean, intrusive thoughts about sex aren't—those are a common aspect of my anxiety. But the really violent ones are. I've read it could be the pregnancy hormones messing with my meds, so I put in a call to my psychiatrist today and I'm hoping for an appointment. I also called in sick because I didn't get any real sleep last night.

I'm sorry to unload this in this thread. I needed to at least release some of it, and posts here help with that. But I didn't want to deal with the comforting yet often sexually needy replies such posts engender from some men.

 

[lil_jenni]

Big hugs to you girl! It always feels good to get some of this stuff out in a way like this. Here if you need to unload anymore!

Thank you! I needed that hug. Hubby knows something is wrong, but I don't want to worry him, so I told him I'm just tired.

 

[Fullygrownbrat]

I saw a thread on here over the weekend (but can't find it now) by a guy asking if other people noticed that sexual references/behaviors were everywhere these days. Two of the examples he cited involved women's clothing (a concert pianist showing a lot of cleavage and college age women wearing revealing clothing). I was going to reply that it seemed quite likely that he was sexualizing behavior that may not have been intended to be sexual, but I knew it would be a waste of time.

But I have to confess that I have come to believe my own behavior contributes to the problem. I've been struggling with my exhibitionism, which manifests both physically (e.g., going to the store in probably inappropriate clothing intending to be noticed and sexualized) and verbally (e.g.,talking about my sexual activities here). It gives me a thrill and helps me feel better about my appearance or about my sexual appetites/thoughts. I mean, positing on here can be very therapeutic and validating... except when it isn't. I usually leave for a bit when it gets too bad, but that often leads to more physical exhibition, which has a different set of problems.

Anyway, I'm feeling particularly in need of posting here because my intrusive thoughts have been turning more and more toward sexual violence, specifically asking my husband to hurt me—I mean, really hurt me—during sex. It's not my standard humiliation/pain/non-consent thoughts that come during sex. Those can get me going or help me get over the edge to an orgasm. Or I can voice them and Hubby may or may not indulge me.

Those are not intrusive thoughts, however. The ones I am having now are. They take me out of the pleasure I'm feeling. Saturday night, they kept me from coming. Last night, I had to ask Hubby to stop because thoughts of him cutting me kept forcing everything else out, and I almost asked him to do it just to make the thoughts stop. I didn't, because not only would that have stopped the sex (which I ended up doing anyway), he would have been worried as fuck about me.

These are unusual events for me. I mean, intrusive thoughts about sex aren't—those are a common aspect of my anxiety. But the really violent ones are. I've read it could be the pregnancy hormones messing with my meds, so I put in a call to my psychiatrist today and I'm hoping for an appointment. I also called in sick because I didn't get any real sleep last night.

I'm sorry to unload this in this thread. I needed to at least release some of it, and posts here help with that. But I didn't want to deal with the comforting yet often sexually needy replies such posts engender from some men.

I'm sorry you're struggling with this right now. Being pregnant can really screw with a lot of things. I think you're taking the best step to keep yourself safe and talking to a professional. That alone shows you are capable of making a good decision, and that you have something you need to work through. *big hugs*

 

[v_indigo]

I saw a thread on here over the weekend (but can't find it now) by a guy asking if other people noticed that sexual references/behaviors were everywhere these days. Two of the examples he cited involved women's clothing (a concert pianist showing a lot of cleavage and college age women wearing revealing clothing). I was going to reply that it seemed quite likely that he was sexualizing behavior that may not have been intended to be sexual, but I knew it would be a waste of time.

But I have to confess that I have come to believe my own behavior contributes to the problem. I've been struggling with my exhibitionism, which manifests both physically (e.g., going to the store in probably inappropriate clothing intending to be noticed and sexualized) and verbally (e.g.,talking about my sexual activities here). It gives me a thrill and helps me feel better about my appearance or about my sexual appetites/thoughts. I mean, positing on here can be very therapeutic and validating... except when it isn't. I usually leave for a bit when it gets too bad, but that often leads to more physical exhibition, which has a different set of problems.

Anyway, I'm feeling particularly in need of posting here because my intrusive thoughts have been turning more and more toward sexual violence, specifically asking my husband to hurt me—I mean, really hurt me—during sex. It's not my standard humiliation/pain/non-consent thoughts that come during sex. Those can get me going or help me get over the edge to an orgasm. Or I can voice them and Hubby may or may not indulge me.

Those are not intrusive thoughts, however. The ones I am having now are. They take me out of the pleasure I'm feeling. Saturday night, they kept me from coming. Last night, I had to ask Hubby to stop because thoughts of him cutting me kept forcing everything else out, and I almost asked him to do it just to make the thoughts stop. I didn't, because not only would that have stopped the sex (which I ended up doing anyway), he would have been worried as fuck about me.

These are unusual events for me. I mean, intrusive thoughts about sex aren't—those are a common aspect of my anxiety. But the really violent ones are. I've read it could be the pregnancy hormones messing with my meds, so I put in a call to my psychiatrist today and I'm hoping for an appointment. I also called in sick because I didn't get any real sleep last night.

I'm sorry to unload this in this thread. I needed to at least release some of it, and posts here help with that. But I didn't want to deal with the comforting yet often sexually needy replies such posts engender from some men.

I’m honestly glad you called your psychiatrist. I think it is always good to try and get a professional opinion when our thoughts worry us.
Ugh. That sounded really clinical, but I’ve had my share of mental health issues, so I really do mean it

 

[lil_jenni]

I'm sorry you're struggling with this right now. Being pregnant can really screw with a lot of things. I think you're taking the best step to keep yourself safe and talking to a professional. That alone shows you are capable of making a good decision, and that you have something you need to work through. *big hugs*

Thanks. And the funny thing is I didn't mean to post it. I just keep writing and it came out, so I figured that's what I needed...

 

[stickygirl]

I saw a thread on here over the weekend (but can't find it now) by a guy asking if other people noticed that sexual references/behaviors were everywhere these days. Two of the examples he cited involved women's clothing (a concert pianist showing a lot of cleavage and college age women wearing revealing clothing). I was going to reply that it seemed quite likely that he was sexualizing behavior that may not have been intended to be sexual, but I knew it would be a waste of time.

But I have to confess that I have come to believe my own behavior contributes to the problem. I've been struggling with my exhibitionism, which manifests both physically (e.g., going to the store in probably inappropriate clothing intending to be noticed and sexualized) and verbally (e.g.,talking about my sexual activities here). It gives me a thrill and helps me feel better about my appearance or about my sexual appetites/thoughts. I mean, positing on here can be very therapeutic and validating... except when it isn't. I usually leave for a bit when it gets too bad, but that often leads to more physical exhibition, which has a different set of problems.

Anyway, I'm feeling particularly in need of posting here because my intrusive thoughts have been turning more and more toward sexual violence, specifically asking my husband to hurt me—I mean, really hurt me—during sex. It's not my standard humiliation/pain/non-consent thoughts that come during sex. Those can get me going or help me get over the edge to an orgasm. Or I can voice them and Hubby may or may not indulge me.

Those are not intrusive thoughts, however. The ones I am having now are. They take me out of the pleasure I'm feeling. Saturday night, they kept me from coming. Last night, I had to ask Hubby to stop because thoughts of him cutting me kept forcing everything else out, and I almost asked him to do it just to make the thoughts stop. I didn't, because not only would that have stopped the sex (which I ended up doing anyway), he would have been worried as fuck about me.

These are unusual events for me. I mean, intrusive thoughts about sex aren't—those are a common aspect of my anxiety. But the really violent ones are. I've read it could be the pregnancy hormones messing with my meds, so I put in a call to my psychiatrist today and I'm hoping for an appointment. I also called in sick because I didn't get any real sleep last night.

I'm sorry to unload this in this thread. I needed to at least release some of it, and posts here help with that. But I didn't want to deal with the comforting yet often sexually needy replies such posts engender from some men.

Intrusive thoughts, if I'm reading you right, can be a symptom of a number of psychiatric conditions. Good news is most are treatable through either looking at physical reasons ( diet, hormones, drugs - stuff you put into your body ) or counselling and what your brain makes of the world.

You are I are on different ends of the scale in terms of finding pain a positive (sexual) experience, but neither of us is wrong - it's a question of degree. If your needs start to affect your health then it's a good time to take stock and figure out if the tail is wagging the dog here.
You're doing the right thing to speak to someone who actually does psychiatry for a job, not some cranky woman like me on a sex site. Have a hug - will I need long arms though? x

 

[lil_jenni]

I’m honestly glad you called your psychiatrist. I think it is always good to try and get a professional opinion when our thoughts worry us.
Ugh. That sounded really clinical, but I’ve had my share of mental health issues, so I really do mean it

Thanks, and it didn't sound too clinical at all.

 

[lil_jenni]

Intrusive thoughts, if I'm reading you right, can be a symptom of a number of psychiatric conditions. Good news is most are treatable through either looking at physical reasons ( diet, hormones, drugs - stuff you put into your body ) or counselling and what your brain makes of the world.
You are I are on different ends of the scale in terms of finding pain a positive (sexual) experience, but neither of us is wrong - it's a question of degree. If your needs start to affect your health then it's an appropriate time to take stock and figure out if the tail is wagging the dog here.
You're doing the right thing to speak to someone who actually does psychiatry for a job, not some cranky woman like me on a sex site. Have a hug - will I need long arms though? x

Thanks! My anxiety can both manifest and amplify intrusive thoughts, but usually they are more situationally intrusive. These are fucking dark... which is what's throwing me.

I also called my therapist, who can see me this afternoon after her regular hours. She also said she'd call the psychiatrist and ask about the meds.

 

[Fullygrownbrat]

Thanks. And the funny thing is I didn't mean to post it. I just keep writing and it came out, so I figured that's what I needed...

I'm glad you did! Hopefully, that is exactly why this thread exists!

 

[Yesok1]

I saw a thread on here over the weekend (but can't find it now) by a guy asking if other people noticed that sexual references/behaviors were everywhere these days. Two of the examples he cited involved women's clothing (a concert pianist showing a lot of cleavage and college age women wearing revealing clothing). I was going to reply that it seemed quite likely that he was sexualizing behavior that may not have been intended to be sexual, but I knew it would be a waste of time.

But I have to confess that I have come to believe my own behavior contributes to the problem. I've been struggling with my exhibitionism, which manifests both physically (e.g., going to the store in probably inappropriate clothing intending to be noticed and sexualized) and verbally (e.g.,talking about my sexual activities here). It gives me a thrill and helps me feel better about my appearance or about my sexual appetites/thoughts. I mean, positing on here can be very therapeutic and validating... except when it isn't. I usually leave for a bit when it gets too bad, but that often leads to more physical exhibition, which has a different set of problems.

Anyway, I'm feeling particularly in need of posting here because my intrusive thoughts have been turning more and more toward sexual violence, specifically asking my husband to hurt me—I mean, really hurt me—during sex. It's not my standard humiliation/pain/non-consent thoughts that come during sex. Those can get me going or help me get over the edge to an orgasm. Or I can voice them and Hubby may or may not indulge me.

Those are not intrusive thoughts, however. The ones I am having now are. They take me out of the pleasure I'm feeling. Saturday night, they kept me from coming. Last night, I had to ask Hubby to stop because thoughts of him cutting me kept forcing everything else out, and I almost asked him to do it just to make the thoughts stop. I didn't, because not only would that have stopped the sex (which I ended up doing anyway), he would have been worried as fuck about me.

These are unusual events for me. I mean, intrusive thoughts about sex aren't—those are a common aspect of my anxiety. But the really violent ones are. I've read it could be the pregnancy hormones messing with my meds, so I put in a call to my psychiatrist today and I'm hoping for an appointment. I also called in sick because I didn't get any real sleep last night.

I'm sorry to unload this in this thread. I needed to at least release some of it, and posts here help with that. But I didn't want to deal with the comforting yet often sexually needy replies such posts engender from some men.

Hey, I am sorry to read this.

I suffer from depression and anxiety. I use the threads here to unload as I try and appear sensible and level headed in real life.

I talk about my sex life on here, because in all honesty, my friends would think I am depraved if I spoke to them. My friends are all straight too. And having such conversations wouldn't be wholly appropriate.

My mind is shockingly filthy for a grown woman, and I need to unload.

I don't want to take away from anything you are feeling @lil_jand send you love. X

I have some understanding as to why you may use lit.

 

[lil_jenni]

Hey, I am sorry to read this.

I suffer from depression and anxiety. I use the threads here to unload as I try and appear sensible and level headed in real life.

I talk about my sex life on here, because in all honesty, my friends would think I am depraved if I spoke to them. My friends are all straight too. And having such conversations wouldn't be wholly appropriate.

My mind is shockingly filthy for a grown woman, and I need to unload.

I don't want to take away from anything you are feeling @lil_jand send you love. X

I have some understanding as to why you may use lit.

Thank you. And oh, I am right there with you about most people I know in real life and how little they know about big parts of the real me.

 

[v_indigo]

I have my own share of dark and twisted things in my brain. This feels like a safe place for us to admit that many of us have this sort of thing

 

[Yesok1]

I have my own share of dark and twisted things in my brain. This feels like a safe place for us to admit that many of us have this sort of thing

It's certainly nice to know I'm not on my own. Having a safe place is important where we aren't judged for our thoughts.

 

[lil_jenni]

It's certainly nice to know I'm not on my own. Having a safe place is important where we aren't judged for our thoughts.

Or have them used against us.

 

[Strixaluco]

I also called my therapist, who can see me this afternoon after her regular hours. She also said she'd call the psychiatrist and ask about the meds.

This sounds good and needed.

Hormone levels may mess up a lot of things in us. And anything out of the ordinary may mess up with mental health issues
.

 

[lil_jenni]

Hubby came home for lunch to check on me. I told him what was wrong. Lots of hugs later, I'm... not exactly feeling better, but rather feeling better equipped to go forward today.

Letting myself look at pics of pretty women isn't hurting either... I didn't want to get in the mood where I might think about dark stuff, but it doesn't seem to come into play when I'm thinking about women... at least not yet.

 

[Yesok1]

Hubby came home for lunch to check on me. I told him what was wrong. Lots of hugs later, I'm... not exactly feeling better, but rather feeling better equipped to go forward today.

Letting myself look at pics of pretty women isn't hurting either... I didn't want to get in the mood where I might think about dark stuff, but it doesn't seem to come into play when I'm thinking about women... at least not yet.

Ooh, sweetie, I feel for you.