❓ Inquiring Minds Want To Know - Discussion Thread

[cascadiabound]

Um. Yeah, Tol and I have a review to post about teledildonics. There's one more phase of testing first. *grins* I'll message you when we post it.

Could you please ping me too?

 

[seela]

#52

Pretty basic question

In your opinion and for your needs -

What makes a good Dom/Top/PYL? What makes a good sub/bottom/pyl?

Different things matter if it's "just a play partner" vs "something else", so this is in a way an impossible question for me to answer, but I'll try.

Likes books and beer and humiliation. Lets me in. Isn't too bothered by my rather blurty yet roundabout way of communicating. Doesn't always let me off the hook when I ask for it and pushes my boundaries. Wants us to succeed, realizes it doesn't necessarily equal me succeeding. Likes face slapping and anal. Similar values. Trusts me. Doesn't find doormats offputting or boring. Likes languages or at least tolerates my odd linguistic rambles and crossword jibber jabber. Bonus points for being able to make me feel myself stupid at times.

 

[Blase]

#52

Pretty basic question

In your opinion and for your needs -

What makes a good Dom/Top/PYL? What makes a good sub/bottom/pyl?

Someone who takes the relationship seriously and puts in a genuine effort. Someone who wants to make a real connection, even online.

Someone who enjoys my particular style; heavy on repartee and affection, light on pain, yet demanding in other ways.

Oh, and someone who doesn't want to fight me. I'm fine with nerves and honest reluctance to do certain things, but if you enjoy drama, please don't bother knocking on my virtual door.

 

[AveryElle]

Um. Yeah, Tol and I have a review to post about teledildonics. There's one more phase of testing first. *grins* I'll message you when we post it.

Which did you get?
We have three items but one I looove. Seriously, why would I buy a toy without Bluetooth capability now?!

 

[cookiecat]

I’m not a brat. I’ll be on top as often as he wants me to, or, if I do and I’m not restrained. I love it rough, biting especially.
And I don’t see how pegging can’t be submissive. I’m not being contrary. I’m genuinely curious.

Because my Dominant handed me a strap on with a big dildo in it and said DO IT.

I complied.

There was a little more interaction in between the demand and my compliance because I felt the same as you did, Fara. Like - wait, WTF??? I'm sure these were the emotions on my face ---->

So let's just say he slapped 'em right off my face, pulled my hair, then kissed me intensely as he fingered me just as intensely and said "I asked you to do this for me."

It made me feel submissive. He helped me put on the get up because it was weird and that was kind of hot.

It's not something he wanted all the time but just wanted to experience.

 

[cookiecat]

Different things matter if it's "just a play partner" vs "something else", so this is in a way an impossible question for me to answer, but I'll try.

Likes books and beer and humiliation. Lets me in. Isn't too bothered by my rather blurty yet roundabout way of communicating. Doesn't always let me off the hook when I ask for it and pushes my boundaries. Wants us to succeed, realizes it doesn't necessarily equal me succeeding. Likes face slapping and anal. Similar values. Trusts me. Doesn't find doormats offputting or boring. Likes languages or at least tolerates my odd linguistic rambles and crossword jibber jabber. Bonus points for being able to make me feel myself stupid at times.

this sounds like a pretty great dating profile.

 

[seela]

Because my Dominant handed me a strap on with a big dildo in it and said DO IT.

I complied.

There was a little more interaction in between the demand and my compliance because I felt the same as you did, Fara. Like - wait, WTF??? I'm sure these were the emotions on my face ---->

So let's just say he slapped 'em right off my face, pulled my hair, then kissed me intensely as he fingered me just as intensely and said "I asked you to do this for me."

It made me feel submissive. He helped me put on the get up because it was weird and that was kind of hot.

It's not something he wanted all the time but just wanted to experience.

I've pegged a dominant dude with a dildo that was gigantic. And those times were easily some of the most intensely submissive and humiliating scenes I've ever experienced. I thought I posted about this here already, but I guess not, because I can't find it at least.

 

[AlwaysFara]

Because my Dominant handed me a strap on with a big dildo in it and said DO IT.

I complied.

There was a little more interaction in between the demand and my compliance because I felt the same as you did, Fara. Like - wait, WTF??? I'm sure these were the emotions on my face ---->

So let's just say he slapped 'em right off my face, pulled my hair, then kissed me intensely as he fingered me just as intensely and said "I asked you to do this for me."

It made me feel submissive. He helped me put on the get up because it was weird and that was kind of hot.

It's not something he wanted all the time but just wanted to experience.

I've pegged a dominant dude with a dildo that was gigantic. And those times were easily some of the most intensely submissive and humiliating scenes I've ever experienced. I thought I posted about this here already, but I guess not, because I can't find it at least.

 

[Dreamliner]

Listening, Communication, She is confident in me, she trusts me.

 

[Knoturnal]

Pretty basic question

In your opinion and for your needs -

What makes a good Dom/Top/PYL? What makes a good sub/bottom/pyl?

For me its pretty much like most relationships. A good sub/bottom/pyl is someone who enjoy most of the things and play I enjoy and have a similar temperament. humor etc. Someone I can talk to and who isn't that judgemental in some ways but is in others.
That's not someone you just find at a play space or any way normally but could be I guess. It takes time and since I'm not very poly it could take more time.

 

[AveryElle]

#52

Pretty basic question

In your opinion and for your needs -

What makes a good Dom/Top/PYL? What makes a good sub/bottom/pyl?

I’ve decided to classify myself as a bratty masochist, and for me, a good Top is someone that likes to push my threshold, which ultimately involves trust and communication. I find that partners who want someone submissive - to collar and have them call them daddy or do more physical power dynamic play like CNC - aren’t for me. My hard limits are involved there and it turns out messy, so I’m pretty open early on that those are my limits.

A good Top for me is a thoughtful sadist. Someone that finds my brattiness more playful than bitchy (even though I am bitchy more often than I should be). Someone that draws out tension. And ultimately it’s about comfort. I can be most comfortable around someone I can laugh with. And once that’s there, I can explore anything. He has to be willing to accept that not everything is for everyone but find value in learning. Take a rope class, find ways to make candle wax easier to clean up. The best partners I’ve had/have, honestly, seem to know me better than I know myself sometimes. They know I’m not into service and I’m not a little girl, so the dynamic is not that of care taker or ‘master’. I’m an adult woman that likes to see how much pain I can take within certain limits. And from there, we have fun. Outside of that, the best Tops are the ones I can drink whiskey with for a few hours before they grab me in the elevator on the way to our room for a kiss and make me feel like nothing else exists in that moment. It’s not as easy to find as you’d think.

 

[Mei5ter]

#52

Pretty basic question

In your opinion and for your needs -

What makes a good Dom/Top/PYL? What makes a good sub/bottom/pyl?

What makes a good pyl?

PLP's parents.

 

[AlwaysFara]

What makes a good pyl?

PLP's parents.

OMG.

 

[AveryElle]

What makes a good pyl?

PLP's parents.

Certainly made me chuckle for a few reasons!

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

What makes a good pyl?

PLP's parents.

I'll tell them you said so

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

#53

#53 (submitted)

I've seen a lot lately about sub frenzy. Can you discuss your experience with sub frenzy? Also is Dom frenzy a thing? Does the depth of emotion you have for your partner change the dynamic?

 

[BadAmy]

53a...
What is subfrenzy?

Splain Lucy....

 

[Knoturnal]

#53 (submitted)

I've seen a lot lately about sub frenzy. Can you discuss your experience with sub frenzy? Also is Dom frenzy a thing? Does the depth of emotion you have for your partner change the dynamic?

I believe there is a lot of information (some good some not so good) just by googling sub frenzy on the internet. Some even on Dom frenzy. as always buckle up, take things with a grain or more of salt and, read.

Yep, you might have to actually read and make your own assessments than just open your ears and believe what someone else's opinion might feed you. Life is soooo hard sometimes

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

I believe there is a lot of information (some good some not so good) just by googling sub frenzy on the internet. Some even on Dom frenzy. as always buckle up, take things with a grain or more of salt and, read.

Yep, you might have to actually read and make your own assessments than just open your ears and believe what someone else's opinion might feed you. Life is soooo hard sometimes

Well as this thread is about discussion and sharing experiences, googling is completely pointless and antithetical.

I'll look forward to your actual answer.

 

[LostGirlTink]

Well as this thread is about discussion and sharing experiences, googling is completely pointless and antithetical.

I'll look forward to your actual answer.

By the time I ask a question I've usually googled a dozen times and read two books on the subject. I like first hand discussion

 

[Knoturnal]

Well as this thread is about discussion and sharing experiences, googling is completely pointless and antithetical.

I'll look forward to your actual answer.

your so sweet ... Pointless and antithetical? directly opposed? seeing how there were countless different sites that talked about it you might find a good explanation you agreed with. It would seem to me to be a personal thing that required personal assessments and personal change if deemed necessary but as always your opinions could differ from mine. As i’m just a dummy as one would think.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

#53 (submitted)

I've seen a lot lately about sub frenzy. Can you discuss your experience with sub frenzy? Also is Dom frenzy a thing? Does the depth of emotion you have for your partner change the dynamic?

When someone new to the submissive dynamic is so enthralled with the experience that they can't get enough. Sometimes leading to a lack of good judgement in their efforts to satisfy their craving.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

your so sweet ... Pointless and antithetical? directly opposed? seeing how there were countless different sites that talked about it you might find a good explanation you agreed with. It would seem to me to be a personal thing that required personal assessments and personal change if deemed necessary but as always your opinions could differ from mine. As i’m just a dummy as one would think.

*You're

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

your so sweet ... Pointless and antithetical? directly opposed? seeing how there were countless different sites that talked about it you might find a good explanation you agreed with. It would seem to me to be a personal thing that required personal assessments and personal change if deemed necessary but as always your opinions could differ from mine. As i’m just a dummy as one would think.

<looks around>

I think you're lost, kid.

This is a discussion thread not an "Answer my question thread." But you're new so I'll explain. I ask a question every week, usually something open ended and requiring the sharing of thoughts, feelings or experiences.

If you want to play, awesome! Please answer the question. If not, you aren't compelled to be here.

 

[Knoturnal]

*You're

Thank you