❓ PLP Inquires II ❓

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

04.15.23

Inspired by an epic thread derailment -

Kink Spectrum

Say there is a spectrum from 1 - 10, vanilla to the most kinky, where do you fall on your own spectrum? Are you happily vanilla? Working on climbing the kink ladder of your fantasies? Or are you now on the precipice of kink with nowhere else to go? We should acknowledge that everyone's idea of vanilla and kink is different? What, to you, is the basic level of vanilla #1 on the spectrum? What does a #10 do that makes them so kinky? Do you portray yourself accurately on Lit or do you like to seem more or less kinky than you actually are?

I would give myself a 4, maybe a soft 5. Vanilla to some, less to others. I don't have many places to go though. My definition of spectrum encompasses the spectrum of human sexuality, so like 1 would be never/near never and if so, missionary for procreation, 2 is missionary more often and maybe birthday/anniversary blowjobs. I can't answer 9 and 10 as against Lit rules, and earn serious prison sentences and sometimes a meeting with Old Sparky. We all know fully asexual people exist, as well as the Edmund Kempers of the world, so any spectrum should include those types at the extremes, in my opinion, otherwise it is flaw as a spectrum of human sexuality.. I would think 80% of people would fail between a 3-7, and even the 3s and 7s may have some serious baggage. I think I portray my life accurately, not sure if people really appreciate how vanilla my place in time right now is though.

 

[stressedsubject]

I tend to think I'm vanilla with some sprinkles. I'm also willing to try new flavors. If I had to give it a number, I would say I'm a solid 5. I think this is because a lot of the very kinky things I think I'd like, I've never actually tried in person. I would consider a 1 your typical missionary, once a week, kinda of sex. And a 10 something I'd see in a BDSM dungeon.

Now I’m thinking what flavor 3 would be? What’s a 10? Is it only sweet flavors? Can it be savory?

 

[Deleted member 6568729]

Now I’m thinking what flavor 3 would be? What’s a 10? Is it only sweet flavors? Can it be savory?

Well, a 10 would have all the toppings! Hot fudge, butterscotch, whipped cream, sprinkles, and of course - a cherry on top.

 

[Whiskeyjack]

Well, a 10 would have all the toppings! Hot fudge, butterscotch, whipped cream, sprinkles, and of course - a cherry on top.

Yeah, but for some of us a 10's toppings would also include things like horseradish, hoisin sauce, and vegemite. Not everything makes the ice cream more delicious.

 

[Deleted member 6568729]

Yeah, but for some of us a 10's toppings would also include things like horseradish, hoisin sauce, and vegemite. Not everything makes the ice cream more delicious.

You're going to the wrong ice cream parlor, babe!

I wonder which topping would be accurate for a religious kink? Nuts?

 

[StacyLeigh]

04.15.23

Inspired by an epic thread derailment -

Kink Spectrum

Say there is a spectrum from 1 - 10, vanilla to the most kinky, where do you fall on your own spectrum? Are you happily vanilla? Working on climbing the kink ladder of your fantasies? Or are you now on the precipice of kink with nowhere else to go? We should acknowledge that everyone's idea of vanilla and kink is different? What, to you, is the basic level of vanilla #1 on the spectrum? What does a #10 do that makes them so kinky? Do you portray yourself accurately on Lit or do you like to seem more or less kinky than you actually are?

I wouldn’t say vanilla is 1…vanilla can be delicious. For me, 1 is like a plain snow cone

I’d say I’m a solid 5, who comes off as a 2-3, but is also happy to venture to the 6-7 realm on occasion. Anything higher is a bit intimidating to me.

I’m a premium vanilla gelato, that pairs well with fun toppings (with an affinity for maple syrup )

 

[Whiskeyjack]

I wouldn’t say vanilla is 1…vanilla can be delicious. For me, 1 is like a plain snow cone

I’d say I’m a solid 5, who comes off as a 2-3, but is also happy to venture to the 6-7 realm on occasion. Anything higher is a bit intimidating to me.

I’m a premium vanilla gelato, that pairs well with fun toppings (with an affinity for maple syrup )

You had me at "maple syrup"
(did I ever tell you that I used to carry sap buckets to the sugarhouse when I was a kid?)

 

[Dribble]

I wouldn’t say vanilla is 1…vanilla can be delicious. For me, 1 is like a plain snow cone

I’d say I’m a solid 5, who comes off as a 2-3, but is also happy to venture to the 6-7 realm on occasion. Anything higher is a bit intimidating to me.

I’m a premium vanilla gelato, that pairs well with fun toppings (with an affinity for maple syrup )

Giggles...premium vanilla gelato...I don't know what I am laughing at this...cause it really does seem to be the most excellent descriptor for most here

 

[Orchidea73]

Indie reminded me the BDSM, which I think it's interesting and relevant to the subject.
For example, I do love ropes, choker and handcuffs, but I do not need them to get aroused. In fact, I rarely use them. I like them just as I like a beautiful and sexy lingerie because I see them as objects of beauty. My interest in them is purely aesthetic, and I'm also selective about it.

To take an example, I do not like latex , at all. But I do love a good leather. I do not love heavy chokers, but I do love a simple and elegant leather one, or lace and satin. But if you tell people, simply: I love a chokers and ropes, they might think there are no discrimination and you are into BDSM. Personally, I do not think I am, but there are some (mild) aspects of it which I'm attracted to.

 

[StillRain]

I feel like I’m a 8-9 on the kink scale, but can and do happily flex to a 1 and achieve sexual peace and freedom.

I’m a kink chameleon, I guess. I’m not sure what kink vibe I give off here on Lit, if that is reflective of my true nature or not. There has probably been sprinkles of it here and there.

 

[Deleted member 1306910]

I feel like I’m a 8-9 on the kink scale, but can and do happily flex to a 1 and achieve sexual peace and freedom.

I’m a kink chameleon, I guess. I’m not sure what kink vibe I give off here on Lit, if that is reflective of my true nature or not. There has probably been sprinkles of it here and there.

Mostly you are even keeled and just the right mix of sexy but classy. Every once in a while you get into a mood and the raunchy fuck lust comes out. Its like a scent in the air and all the guys find themselves mysteriously overwhelmed by desire.

Sorry. That was meant to come off as sexy and flirty, not quite so creepy sexual harassment.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

If I have to fall anywhere, I'd prefer somewhere soft. For this reason I'd like to ask you, @ShyNaughtyGirl and @Justadesperatewifeandmom to lie side by side on your backs so I can use your boobs as an ersatz crash mat, please. I have no other reason for this request.

hahaha. Well, you know what they say about chicks who will let you use their boobs as pillows.....Well actually I don't, Do you? Tell me.

However, I am trying to picture the logistics of this, and am wondering if you have thought this out. See, like a man has told me (my husband, at least 100 times over the past 25 years, whenever I ask for a threesome) "I can barely handle you, why the fuck would I want two". As I see it, this gives three chatty gals a lot of time to talk. This could lead to chaos, absolute chaos. For all I know, we could end up deciding to wine and prime, then order new purses, that 55 gallon drum of warming lube, and cat butt tissue dispensers. Are you sure you are prepared for cat butt tissue dispensers? I am not sure I am, but well... I guess they will match my cat butt magnets. OK.

 

[LadyLascivious1]

It’s fantastic to see you back, @Justadesperatewifeandmom! I hope you were off doing deliciously fun things

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

It’s fantastic to see you back, @Justadesperatewifeandmom! I hope you were off doing deliciously fun things

alas, I was not. Mostly just putting out household fires, when it rains it pours. Everything worked out in the end, well mostly, eventually, sort of. All the people are still alive and I did not have to pull $10,000 out of my ass. How have you been?

 

[LadyLascivious1]

alas, I was not. Mostly just putting out household fires, when it rains it pours. Everything worked out in the end, well mostly, eventually, sort of. All the people are still alive and I did not have to pull $10,000 out of my ass. How have you been?

That sounds like a win.

Work and family have been crazy, but it’s getting warmer which puts me in a great mood. I’ve celebrated by buying lots of new sex toys

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I did ask Rubber Rachel about this but she just hissed and looked a little deflated

Duh. So that y'all can entertain each other while he goes out to the workshop midway through to get more work done fixing the truck...

...which he's so kindly fixing for you in order to collect the 55 gallon drum of lube because the delivery charges on those are more brutal than not using lube...

...and I and my cat butt pencil sharpener are ahead of you.

Damn it, if I order a random cat butt pencil sharpener instead of a random adult accessory or lingerie next weekend, I am blaming you. This is why I have zebra combat boots, a black and white cow cowgirl hat, and a fluffy pink beer helmet.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

That sounds like a win.

Work and family have been crazy, but it’s getting warmer which puts me in a great mood. I’ve celebrated by buying lots of new sex toys

oh oh, what did you get? I have one I have been mulling over, but I am also just looking for things I don't have.

 

[AlpineFresco]

"fluffy pink beer helmet" is a hell of a disease.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Look. I have a thing for girls with fluffy pink beer helmets, and you totally consented to wear that for me. But I'm not taking the blame for the boots.

Hell, out of the 3, the zebra boots get the most use. They are my meeting random strangers from the internet boots (not in a pervy way). Yeah, I'll be the chick in the leopard top and zebra combat boots, can't miss me. Even Florida doesn't have 2 people with that combination under one roof.

"fluffy pink beer helmet" is a hell of a disease.

Seriously, the struggle is real. Can't even warn people that shit is about to go down with the call of my people, "hold my beer".

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

04.15.23

Inspired by an epic thread derailment -

And as always this thread is a reminder that I need to be a better communicator. Just bc it makes sense in my brain doesn't mean it will make sense to anyone else.

Kink Spectrum

Say there is a spectrum from 1 - 10, vanilla to the most kinky, where do you fall on your own spectrum? Are you happily vanilla? Working on climbing the kink ladder of your fantasies? Or are you now on the precipice of kink with nowhere else to go? We should acknowledge that everyone's idea of vanilla and kink is different? What, to you, is the basic level of vanilla #1 on the spectrum? What does a #10 do that makes them so kinky? Do you portray yourself accurately on Lit or do you like to seem more or less kinky than you actually are?

So my spectrum looks something like this
1 - Vanilla: basic positions, oral sex, kissing, cuddles (I know people for whom this would be a level 3 or 4 because for them oral sex is kinky)
5 - Medium: roleplay, pretty filthy dirty talk, mess, pain, things that require aftercare
10 - Expert: blood, injury, total sensory deprivation, extreme humiliation, permanent/semi permanent marking (i literally saw clip of a man shaving a woman's head as part of kink - where is my fucking safe word )

So based on my spectrum, I will never be a 10 nor do I want to be a 10. I'm a comfortable 8 with my person and a lower number for a new or occasional partner. Things I like involve trust and I don't trust easily at all. I'm happy with my spot on the spectrum or ladder. I don't think it's a prize to win but desires to explore and as long as you're happy with where you are... then that's all that matters.

I think I probably underplay my kink a little bit and probably should underplay it more. I think there is a certain type of person who wants to experience your kink rather than get to know you. That's a topic for another day. I do love O's line about "Any men who must say 'I am the King' is no true King." I think that's very true and while some people may be really good at one niche thing, they often have blind spots to other things. Being curious and flexible is really important, in my opinion.

ETA: Jesus what an incoherent ramble... I'll edit it later.

 

[RosewoodTulip]

04.15.23

Inspired by an epic thread derailment -

Kink Spectrum

Say there is a spectrum from 1 - 10, vanilla to the most kinky, where do you fall on your own spectrum? Are you happily vanilla? Working on climbing the kink ladder of your fantasies? Or are you now on the precipice of kink with nowhere else to go? We should acknowledge that everyone's idea of vanilla and kink is different? What, to you, is the basic level of vanilla #1 on the spectrum? What does a #10 do that makes them so kinky? Do you portray yourself accurately on Lit or do you like to seem more or less kinky than you actually are?

So on my spectrum 1 would be where I was 2 years ago when I completely shut down from all things sexual and even wondered if I'd become asexual (I've had a lot of therapy since, it's fine) and 10 would be stuff that would probably get your computer seized.
In real life I've been quite vanilla but still happy to try out various positions etc so I'd say maybe 2-3 on the spectrum.
Since joining Lit I'd say I'd probably sit at around 4-5. Learning and exploring but still have a way to go. If I was attached I'd hopefully be doing this irl too but it's all research haha
I try to portray myself honestly here cos I think that's the only way I can really figure myself out. When I first joined I pretended to be much more confident and experienced than I am. My inbox was flooded before I even made a post and it was fun for a little while but pretending to be something I'm not is exhausting so I'd rather be here as me.

 

[Cat]

04.15.23

Inspired by an epic thread derailment -

Kink Spectrum

Say there is a spectrum from 1 - 10, vanilla to the most kinky, where do you fall on your own spectrum?

I do not really know.. it seems that there are no standard value for these things, but.. I do not like things like: gore, permanent markings, illegal things..

But, everything from missionary to more kinky activities.. depending on the partner, the mood.. atmosphere.. well, I like it to be fun, safe and authentic.. It is all about the presence, the trust and connection.

Are you happily vanilla?

I do not think so.

Working on climbing the kink ladder of your fantasies? Or are you now on the precipice of kink with nowhere else to go?

Nah, I am pretty content with my niveau.. but you never know.. the kink ladder.. it is not just up an down.. it is three-dimensional, so the depths.. the width.. There are so much to explore!

We should acknowledge that everyone's idea of vanilla and kink is different? What, to you, is the basic level of vanilla #1 on the spectrum? What does a #10 do that makes them so kinky?

To me... A #1 would be, normal Tuesday sex, a bit oral, fingering, kissing.. maybe anal..
Then a #10 - permanent injury, marking, stuff that might cross the border of being legal..

Do you portray yourself accurately on Lit or do you like to seem more or less kinky than you actually are?

Depends... I am not super duper kinky all the time.. so.. I am just me.. so, yes, I am being myself here.

I might not show my kinks as openly as others, but.. that is okay. We are all different, and we all got layers.

 

[parker77]

for my pleasure i’m probably in the 3-4 range per your scale. my needs and satisfaction just don’t require too much kink. for my partner, i can operate up in maybe the 7 level if that’s what she needs/wants to be happy and satisfied. however, i’m definitely not interested in going to 10 or probably even 9.

 

[Azuldrgon]

04.15.23

Inspired by an epic thread derailment -

Kink Spectrum

Say there is a spectrum from 1 - 10, vanilla to the most kinky, where do you fall on your own spectrum? Are you happily vanilla? Working on climbing the kink ladder of your fantasies? Or are you now on the precipice of kink with nowhere else to go? We should acknowledge that everyone's idea of vanilla and kink is different? What, to you, is the basic level of vanilla #1 on the spectrum? What does a #10 do that makes them so kinky? Do you portray yourself accurately on Lit or do you like to seem more or less kinky than you actually are?

https://voca.ro/14emWfSlI4U0

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

Is there a difference between the spectrum of your fantasies and what you'd like to try (or have tried) in person? I am sure that for most people the whole point of fantasies is that they imagine what is out there in the darkness beyond our reality, so I'd expect fantasies to be darker. But it interests me that at least one of your 10s sits happily in my reality while at least one of your 5s feels harder than that for me. Luckily, taking the mean gives us a 7.5, and as that's under the 8 your comfortable experiencing with your person, I guess we can manage

Interesting question. I honestly don't think I like fantasizing about things I wouldn't want to try in person. Take spanking as a light example. I don't watch spanking porn and then get annoyed when smacked on the bottom. A better example would be threesomes, I don't talk a big game and get squirmy over the idea only to freeze up when the right pussy comes along. Now, there are things I've never been introduced to or things I think might fall outside what I feel comfortable with but when I have someone explain what they like about, why it's hot to them, I often can change my mind. Often, not always. My 5 is relative to my comfort level but it definitely won't be for everyone. Now I'm tempted to make a full spectrum diagram. Don't tempt me with charts and spreadsheets.