ASSHAT AWARDS: Best of the Worst PMs and Emails Received

[satindesire]

We're plenty tolerant.

We just don't like you.

*chuckle*

 

[WriterDom]

We're plenty tolerant.

We just don't like you.

We? So you are a collective now? There are people who don't like you, you know? I'm not one. I just don't care about you.

 

[satindesire]

I didn't say a damn thing about it being illegal, immoral or anything. I clearly stated I said it SPECIFICALLY to hurt that guy's feelings. I clearly stated my ex was older. Get off your high horse.

 

[Kajira Callista]

We're plenty tolerant.

We just don't like you.

did someone send that to you in a PM?

 

[satindesire]

did someone send that to you in a PM?

I don't think it takes a PM to know that.

 

[WriterDom]

I didn't say a damn thing about it being illegal, immoral or anything. I clearly stated I said it SPECIFICALLY to hurt that guy's feelings. I clearly stated my ex was older. Get off your high horse.

.

That part just caught my eye. I didn't read your entire post.

I think it's better just to delete a PM anyway. Most of these guys are spam artists anyway and by the time you write back they've sent 10 more to other women.

 

[BiBunny]

If two people of legal age, whatever those ages may be, want to be together, it doesn't make me any difference. What's creepy is when old guys assume any younger girl wants to be with them. I hope that once I'm older (God forbid, I don't want to think about it) some of that will stop. Why do they just assume you want to fuck them, I wonder? Hope springs eternal, maybe? I dunno.

 

[MisterSir]

We? So you are a collective now?.

Pretty much, yeah. I do represent the opinions of others who are not me.

 

[WriterDom]

If two people of legal age, whatever those ages may be, want to be together, it doesn't make me any difference. What's creepy is when old guys assume any younger girl wants to be with them. I hope that once I'm older (God forbid, I don't want to think about it) some of that will stop. Why do they just assume you want to fuck them, I wonder? Hope springs eternal, maybe? I dunno.

They don't in the real world. This is the internet where no one's wife cares if they fuck around and all the guys have 10 inch cocks.

 

[WriterDom]

Pretty much, yeah. I do represent the opinions of others who are not me.

]Pretty much, yeah. I do represent the opinions of others.

That's better. I would think "others" on its own would exclude you.

 

[BiBunny]

They don't in the real world. This is the internet where no one's wife cares if they fuck around and all the guys have 10 inch cocks.

I know you can expect it on the Internet. It's the weirdos in real life that drive me nuts. If I go anywhere with my friends, it's guaranteed that any man over the age of 50 who isn't already there with a woman is going to come over and hit on me.

Do I have a flashing sign over my head? "Please hit on the fat chick?" It's insane.

 

[WriterDom]

I know you can expect it on the Internet. It's the weirdos in real life that drive me nuts. If I go anywhere with my friends, it's guaranteed that any man over the age of 50 who isn't already there with a woman is going to come over and hit on me.

Do I have a flashing sign over my head? "Please hit on the fat chick?" It's insane.

Do you wear a wedding ring? I guess it's assumed that fat means easy in the culture. Depending on where you are and what time it is. They all get pretty at closing time.

 

[BiBunny]

Do you wear a wedding ring? I guess it's assumed that fat means easy in the culture. Depending on where you are and what time it is. They all get pretty at closing time.

I've got a fake engagement ring around here somewhere. Maybe I should dig it up again.

 

[satindesire]

I've got a fake engagement ring around here somewhere. Maybe I should dig it up again.

Are you sure they're hitting on you because you're fat, or because you're FUCKING BEAUTIFUL!?

*smooch*

 

[BiBunny]

Are you sure they're hitting on you because you're fat, or because you're FUCKING BEAUTIFUL!?

*smooch*

I you! I would imagine there are tons of dirty old men hitting on you for the same reason.

 

[satindesire]

I you! I would imagine there are tons of dirty old men hitting on you for the same reason.

I wub you too sweetie.

I have had a LOT less men hitting on me since I started wearing my wedding bands 24/7. Seriously, that idea about you wearing that fake engagement ring is a brilliant idea.

 

[graceanne]

I've got a fake engagement ring around here somewhere. Maybe I should dig it up again.

I have a single friend who always wears a wedding ring on her ring finger to avoid assholes bugging her. It works wonders.

 

[Tawny_Temptress]

It's the most important part of a woman for me. I don't care about the rest of the body if I don't like the face.

I like mens faces and voices.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

I don't think him being old enough to be your father makes him a sick fuck. A dreamer maybe. Some girls are into older guys.

What I hated when I was on the market was older guys who would message me and then get genuinely offended when I turned them down, despite my stipulating a preferred age range in the first place. I even got accused of ageism. Is it not equally ageist that older guys would prefer to fuck me than their 40+ counterparts?

I'm not directing this at you particularly WD, just your comment reminded me of some of the hassle I got.

 

[Tawny_Temptress]

Just wow. I have no words for this one.


Good morning,

My name is _______. I'm a 42 year old woman spending her summer at a nudist camp with my husband, son, and daughter.

I've taken an interest in your profile and want to know if you'd like to talk? I'm a slave to my husband and online Mother, and act in incest with my son and daughter.

I know that could be the end of our talking right there, but I have to be honest about who we are.

Would you like to know us?

Creepy?

 

[Tawny_Temptress]

On fetlife:

high, my name is (asshat) and I was wondering what it takes to be able to fuck a hot lady like you?

thanx!!

My Reply:

I can't even begin to tell you how sad and disgusting this is.

You know, I'm sure that I'm not the only woman you've sent this message to. You're wanting to get something to jerk off to, and instead of just googling "Tits" or something like that, you thought you'd be lazy and get someone else to do your dirty work for you.

So, you've crafted a copy/paste message to send to as many women as you possibly could, casting your net as wide as you could on the slim chance that SOMEONE...ANYONE will reply to you and give you the wanking fodder you're so desperate for. I'm sure you're sitting in front of your computer either naked or with your pathetic dick out right now, hoping that some random woman who you messaged has sent you something to pull your dick to.

Not only did you not even bother to read my profile, which clearly stated that I was happily married and pregnant with our first baby, but I also made it perfectly clear to anyone with more than one brain cell that I would not be chatting with ANYONE in any way other than purely platonic...and to not even bother messaging me if platonic wasn't the subject at hand.

In case you don't know what the word "Platonic" means, the definition is not "because some random stranger messages me with "tell me what it's like to fuck you" I'll describe in vivid graphic detail down to the last moment of orgasm."

So kindly go suck your own dick, you illiterate fucking moron. And consider yourself blocked. At your age (you're old enough to be my fucking FATHER by the way, you SICK FUCK) I would hope that you'd be far more mature than this, but alas, my hope for the human race has once again been shattered by your blatant display of sheer stupidity and sexual immaturity.

Don't bother messaging me, I won't get it. You won't be able to even SEE my profile either. Try contacting me in any other way and I'll report you for harassment.

Have a nice night, asshole

http://i370.photobucket.com/albums/oo146/Sedna_rlc/Smiley/Bow.gif

 

[WriterDom]

What I hated when I was on the market was older guys who would message me and then get genuinely offended when I turned them down, despite my stipulating a preferred age range in the first place. I even got accused of ageism. Is it not equally ageist that older guys would prefer to fuck me than their 40+ counterparts?

I'm not directing this at you particularly WD, just your comment reminded me of some of the hassle I got.

Why should you care if some stranger you will never met gets genuinely offended over nothing? If I were a woman I wouldn't even bother with men online.

 

[Tawny_Temptress]

Why should you care if some stranger you will never met gets genuinely offended over nothing? If I were a woman I wouldn't even bother with men online.

I am sticking to real life now. The only problem there is, they are never as into sexual experimentation as I am. But, as least I know who they are, or at least have a better idea of who they are.

 

[00Syd]

I know that this might be getting a little too serious for this thread, but its something that I've been thinking about a lot lately.

I've been thinking about how pretty much everything that I find annoying or creepy in the scene comes back to assumptions. People making assumptions about orientation, role, status, relationship-type, whatever. Usually when we label a guy "creepy" its because he either made an assumption about us, approached us with obvious sexual intentions (without making any effort to be friendly first), or both. I'm sure that every woman on this board will agree, this happens a lot, both online and in real life.

I've noticed that because this happens so often, women in the scene (myself included) begin to expect every man who approaches them to be a creepy guy. This has caused the women being approached to start to make assumptions as well. Since I've started thinking more consciously about this, I've started to realize that a lot of guys who I would have previously automatically labeled as creepy (maybe even before they spoke to me) are actually just asking a question, or maybe a little shy, or awkward in some other way. I've really started to think about it, and have stopped writing off every male who approaches me as creepy. I am making a concerted effort to respond to these men politely unless they are truly "creepy guys," and identify themselves as such by making assumptions, having expectations of me (before they know me), and/or approaching me with a sexual offer before trying to get to know me as a friend.

So, yeah. Reading some of the "asshat's" on this thread with this new outlook, I've noticed that a lot of the time the men approaching are not actually doing anything wrong (yet). Many may have a poor hold on the english language, or are possibly a little too blunt, but for the most part many haven't done anything yet that would (now) ring the creep alarm bell in my head. I would advocate taking a second look at any asshat you may receive before responding, so that you cannot be accused of making an equally egregious assumption as the creepy guys we try to ward off.

 

[bholderman]

Great point! From the male side, the prevalence of "creepiness", primarily bcause of men, I hesitate a lot in talking to women. The specific reason is that I figure regardless of what I say, Im simply going to come across as a perv.

I know that this might be getting a little too serious for this thread, but its something that I've been thinking about a lot lately.

I've been thinking about how pretty much everything that I find annoying or creepy in the scene comes back to assumptions. People making assumptions about orientation, role, status, relationship-type, whatever. Usually when we label a guy "creepy" its because he either made an assumption about us, approached us with obvious sexual intentions (without making any effort to be friendly first), or both. I'm sure that every woman on this board will agree, this happens a lot, both online and in real life.

I've noticed that because this happens so often, women in the scene (myself included) begin to expect every man who approaches them to be a creepy guy. This has caused the women being approached to start to make assumptions as well. Since I've started thinking more consciously about this, I've started to realize that a lot of guys who I would have previously automatically labeled as creepy (maybe even before they spoke to me) are actually just asking a question, or maybe a little shy, or awkward in some other way. I've really started to think about it, and have stopped writing off every male who approaches me as creepy. I am making a concerted effort to respond to these men politely unless they are truly "creepy guys," and identify themselves as such by making assumptions, having expectations of me (before they know me), and/or approaching me with a sexual offer before trying to get to know me as a friend.

So, yeah. Reading some of the "asshat's" on this thread with this new outlook, I've noticed that a lot of the time the men approaching are not actually doing anything wrong (yet). Many may have a poor hold on the english language, or are possibly a little too blunt, but for the most part many haven't done anything yet that would (now) ring the creep alarm bell in my head. I would advocate taking a second look at any asshat you may receive before responding, so that you cannot be accused of making an equally egregious assumption as the creepy guys we try to ward off.