ASSHAT AWARDS: Best of the Worst PMs and Emails Received

[DVS]

Nah. I just report stupid people as spam in hopes that it'll get their accounts blocked.

That was you? I just wanted to lick the jam from between your toes, after a hard day at work. Now, is that so weird?

 

[VelvetDarkness]

Asshat: I just had to tell you that you have a really huge ass.

WTF??? Huge? I'm 5 feet tall and weigh 120lb.

The word he was looking for (and would never have thought of or spelled in a million years) was 'spectacular.'

I'd still have deleted it on the spot though.

Huge indeed.

 

[Ladythunder]

Asshat: I just had to tell you that you have a really huge ass.

WTF??? Huge? I'm 5 feet tall and weigh 120lb.

The word he was looking for (and would never have thought of or spelled in a million years) was 'spectacular.'

I'd still have deleted it on the spot though.

Huge indeed.

I dunno, if thats your ass in you AV, it is definitely not huge...bitable and kissable and stuff yes, but not huge

Sorry, just my opinion lol

 

[ShyGuy68]

Asshat: I just had to tell you that you have a really huge ass.

WTF??? Huge? I'm 5 feet tall and weigh 120lb.

The word he was looking for (and would never have thought of or spelled in a million years) was 'spectacular.'

I'd still have deleted it on the spot though.

Huge indeed.

Ok I admit it, I had a bit of a hard time keeping my eyes away from that part of your body as well, and there's nothing huge about it!! You are right, the right term is spectacular, at least af far as I was able to judge!!

 

[marieR19]

spectacular, hot, yummy, kissable.... those come to mind, yes. But huge? WHAT was that Asshat on?! Gosh.


Heather

 

[Etoile]

i love that top your wearing in your pic! dam that was made for sex! you know one of those things you could leave on during sex and it just makes it better!

Buh...what?

 

[00Syd]

Buh...what?

Haha, I guess he likes your top

 

[madetotakeit]

Collarme profile reactivated for just a few hours and this was already waiting in my mailbox...

Kinda funny listening to a sub make her demands about what she'll accept... always makes me wonder where the submission is in all this... plus that deadly Superman/White Knight thing you have going... I'm less than perfect, Dominant to the core, yet I have zero attraction to your profile... should tell you something but you'll only come back nasty and then wonder why you are still alone.

Do they sit and wait for the next opportunity to show what an asshat they are?

Deleted and blocked...

 

[FungiUg]

That attitude always surprises me. If a submissive doesn't post what she (or he, or it, or other) is looking for, how the hell is a dominant supposed to know? I for one am not a mind-reader.

 

[Kajira Callista]

That attitude always surprises me. If a submissive doesn't post what she (or he, or it, or other) is looking for, how the hell is a dominant supposed to know? I for one am not a mind-reader.

you arent *stomps foot* you lied to me

 

[FungiUg]

you arent *stomps foot* you lied to me

No, you only think I lied to you, because I planted that suggestion directly into your mind.

Oh, wait...

Dammit, KC, are you stalking me?

 

[madetotakeit]

That attitude always surprises me. If a submissive doesn't post what she (or he, or it, or other) is looking for, how the hell is a dominant supposed to know? I for one am not a mind-reader.

And that is why you are a Dom and not an asshat!

 

[Kajira Callista]

No, you only think I lied to you, because I planted that suggestion directly into your mind.

Oh, wait...

Dammit, KC, are you stalking me?

yes dear *bats lashes and smiles sweetly*

 

[FungiUg]

And that is why you are a Dom and not an asshat!

Nooo... I think I'm a dominant because I like to control and manipulate and play with willing women's minds and bodies and use them for my perverse sexual pleasure.

Or maybe it's because someone gave me this spiffy little hat that says "Dominant"?

Yeah, one of those.

 

[madetotakeit]

Nooo... I think I'm a dominant because I like to control and manipulate and play with willing women's minds and bodies and use them for my perverse sexual pleasure.

*sigh*

 

[catalina_francisco]

Linking this thread at the wise suggestion of Sir_Winston54.

Catalina

 

[sexycaz22]

Damn, damn.....I forgot about this thread! I have had a very stupid and silly asshat PM from a subbie......damn....wish I didn't delete it on the spot! (checked my inbox on a website, luckily his orgainal message was in my reply to his!)

please take me as your bitch sub - control me own me whip me flog me do as you please

 

[YourCaptor]

I get to post one in here, believe it or not.

Here’s and excerpt.

… I really liked reading some of your posts as you come across as a really honest, open woman with a great sense of passions…

Looks like I should join DB in the feminist club

as an open women, I feel like I just transgressed some kind of limit, or this guy has no clue.

By the way, can you say “open man”? I think that gets back into the, men can’t have feeling bull. Maybe I should become a women, further my options and such.

 

[FungiUg]

By the way, can you say “open man”? I think that gets back into the, men can’t have feeling bull. Maybe I should become a women, further my options and such.

You absolutely can. I don't think being "open" or "open minded" is gender related. It's a state of mind.

 

[madetotakeit]

How is this for an opener...

Unknown asshat:hello meat
me: (hits X button)

And people have wondered why I said some of the people I have encountered online scare me.

I have a feeling I'm going to be contributing to this thread quite a bit.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

From our 14 inch friend.

end of u

id like to choak you till you die

To which I replied:

How sweet.

You can't go your whole life without a sense of humour you know. It'll be very boring to try.

Kisses

 

[DeservingBitch]

Looks like I should join DB in the feminist club

Sorry, we're not taking any new applications at the moment.

 

[cherokee_dove]

Player with 0 postings - Ask in a forum

Hey Cherokee Dove,

Say, I am looking for an experienced woman’s perspective here. This is not meant to offend you as I am seeking the honest insights of a woman.

Perhaps you can help me (a very horny, young man) out with a personal concern of mine. About fellatio… I absolutely love ejaculating very hard inside a girl's mouth at the end of a good, long blow job. But, I am wondering how do girls feel about this? (Honestly, I have not thought to ask them about it at the time. And my past girlfriends seemed to be rather shy in discussing it later.)

Do women enjoy the physical sensations of the ejaculation inside their mouth? Do they prefer a strong climax with forceful spurts and lots of the cum? Do girls like it when they can swallow a really large volume of the hot sperm?

What are your thoughts?

Thanks. Best, Asshat Player

*****, go ***** someone else, as i think your an asshat player for even asking without ever posting anything!

 

[BiBunny]

*****, go ***** someone else, as i think your an asshat player for even asking without ever posting anything!

I think dude sends this one out to as many chicks as he can every week or so. I know I've gotten it two or three times myself.

 

[satindesire]

I think dude sends this one out to as many chicks as he can every week or so. I know I've gotten it two or three times myself.

I've gotten it as well! Wtf does this guy think he's accomplishing?! Honest to God?!