LITEROTICA PODCAST
LIT CAMS (200 Free Tokens)ADULT TOYSVOD MOVIES

ASSHAT AWARDS: Best of the Worst PMs and Emails Received

Status
Not open for further replies.
DVS said:
She does? :eek: If you say so.
But, now that she's explained organisator...she also said she "organisates" escording...if I understood her correctly. :rolleyes:
Does she happen to explain escording too?
Click to expand...

I keep thinking of someone escorting an accordeon :confused:
 
fieryjen said:
I keep thinking of someone escorting an accordeon :confused:
Click to expand...

Now that would be handy! You know, for those moments when you really feel like playing your french accordian somewhere nice, but you're too ashamed to be seen travelling with it. I get those moments all the time.

Oh, wait, I don't play the french accordian.
 
i got one today. if it wasnt so sad and pathetic i think i would have been upset but all i found it was funny
 
FungiUg said:
Now that would be handy! You know, for those moments when you really feel like playing your french accordian somewhere nice, but you're too ashamed to be seen travelling with it. I get those moments all the time.

Oh, wait, I don't play the french accordian.
Click to expand...
Hee :D
myinnerslut said:
i got one today. if it wasnt so sad and pathetic i think i would have been upset but all i found it was funny
Click to expand...

How can you make our mouths water and then not share? :eek:
 
DVS said:
But, now that she's explained organisator...she also said she "organisates" escording...if I understood her correctly. :rolleyes:
Does she happen to explain escording too?
Click to expand...

No, unfortunately her profile doesn't explain escording. So I asked her
Tabea said:
Why would I want to be sold?

And what exactly is escording?
Click to expand...

Her reply:
u will be sold to an owner
for a short term or long term
u will be paid
tell me
what are you seeking
master or mistress
u have any pics?
Click to expand...



Right now I feel a bit tempted to ask a guy what an "Egyption master" is.
 
FungiUg said:
$1.50 then? I could go to $1.25, but it would have to be my final offer.

(Hey, I don't bid on many girls, whatever the price!)
Click to expand...

€800? I would go so far as to say €850, but that would really be it.

(Hey, I don't auction myself off to many guys, whatever the price!)


;)
 
chris9 said:
€800? I would go so far as to say €850, but that would really be it.

(Hey, I don't auction myself off to many guys, whatever the price!)


;)
Click to expand...

Dammit, now I'm actually tempted! See what comes of practicing ass-hattery? It's dangerous!
 
I'm going to post this here, although I think it's almost sad rather than ass-hattery.

hotlgirl_slut said:
RE: seeking a good Master / man
Hello Master

Hello sir, and have browse by yourprofile and i found it very intresting, i am a submissive black gitl from west africa and i seek a Master or man to own me as his property and slave 24/7...i am willing to serve him with my body and soul and ready to santify u with sex day and nite sir and also to relocate anytime he is ready for me to come to him..........i am 25years old slave, 5.7 fit tall with burst 34c and a slave of no limit accept pains and toilet. I will be happy to hear from you once you have agree to train me along and we see where its good from there. i am already a trained slave but still need more from you Master so as to get use to your lifestyle.

i Love to hear from you soon.

Your to be
submissive girl
Click to expand...

It's kind of easy to deal with the stupid and ridiculous. It's harder to deal with someone who sounds genuine (although I suspect she had someone else write the content for her, hence the "RE:" in the subject.) Of course I sent her back a polite refusal (and even failed to point out that my profile says I'm not looking for anyone.)

But I love the intention to sanctify me with sex. Somehow that just works.
 
FungiUg said:
I'm going to post this here, although I think it's almost sad rather than ass-hattery.
Click to expand...

That sounds like a version of the Nigerian scams. You need to send her money if you want her to go be with you... then she'll have complications and need more money, and so on and so on.
 
RawHumor said:
That sounds like a version of the Nigerian scams. You need to send her money if you want her to go be with you... then she'll have complications and need more money, and so on and so on.
Click to expand...

Could be. I've already met that one several times.
 
This isn't the worst message I've received, but I deleted all of those before I saw this thread. :(

I got this one, today.

"Hope you don't mind me writing you, but I saw your profile online and thought you were too cute not to say hi. I'm a 26 year old guy from Nashville and just wanted to meet a few people from the area. If you're interested in talking, I hope to hear back from ya. Or if you want to catch me on Yahoo, my sn is __________."

My response:

"First of all, your profile says you're 28. Not 26. So either you lied to me, or you lied on there. Either way, I don't talk to liars.

Secondly, I'm not interested in anyone who's only interested in me because I'm 'cute'. I have more to offer than that. And I offer it to Master.

Get bent."

It's not really that bad in the grand scheme of things, but I'm in a foul mood and the "too cute" thing bothered me. I'm not just skin and hair and sex, you know? Plus, he lied about his age, and liars REALLY piss me off. And how generic! He probably just changes the location with each new girl he e-mails.
 
c0m4t04st said:
This isn't the worst message I've received, but I deleted all of those before I saw this thread. :(

I got this one, today.

"Hope you don't mind me writing you, but I saw your profile online and thought you were too cute not to say hi. I'm a 26 year old guy from Nashville and just wanted to meet a few people from the area. If you're interested in talking, I hope to hear back from ya. Or if you want to catch me on Yahoo, my sn is __________."
Click to expand...

Cute? Hmmmm... I'd go more with goth. There aren't enough pics on your profile and no link to an AmPics thread so I'll reserve judgement on the cuteness factor. Not bad as trolls go, could definitely use some pointers on style but at least he's typing whole words and somewhat grammatically correct English.

*holds up sign* 8.7
 
Evil_Geoff said:
Cute? Hmmmm... I'd go more with goth. There aren't enough pics on your profile and no link to an AmPics thread so I'll reserve judgement on the cuteness factor. Not bad as trolls go, could definitely use some pointers on style but at least he's typing whole words and somewhat grammatically correct English.

*holds up sign* 8.7
Click to expand...

I said it wasn't that bad, ha. :p

Edit: And there will be more pictures, most definitely. Master just wants to be the one to take them, and approve them first.
 
Last edited:
Ok..so maybe this isnt the worst..and I'm leaving off the name

but this one just made me laugh..then blink.. then laugh again...

Hi Fi,

I don't mean to sound mean or anything, but your AV looks like somebody threw up on your boob.


Otherwise, it's a very nice looking boob.


Best Wishes,

XXX
Click to expand...
 
EmpressFi said:
Ok..so maybe this isnt the worst..and I'm leaving off the name

but this one just made me laugh..then blink.. then laugh again...
Click to expand...

Gotta love the clueless... Me, I LIKE wax dribbles... Especially when I'm taking them off with a straight razor. :devil:
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

TheIntrepidBoyager
It's Not Always Dildos and Roses...
Replies
4
Views
546
dingdongditchding
D
P
Bots.... Lots and Lots of Bots...
Replies
12
Views
621
lil_jenni
lil_jenni
T
Exhibitionism and the extreme pleasure of humiliation
Replies
18
Views
1K
IARainman
IARainman
T
Subs, what do you think about devotion?
Replies
17
Views
2K
Havanawang
H
L
Leahaven
37 38 39
Replies
972
Views
42K
LeaHaven
L
Back
Top