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Can we talk about the perfect breast size?

MillieDynamite said:
I'm thankful for my small breasts. No back ache from carrying around double Ds or bigger, not much sag possible, and no need to wear a bra if I wear something heavy to hide my nips.
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Same with my GF. Doesn’t really need a bra, hers don’t (and probably never will) sag, but they’re still plenty suckable. Once or twice when she realizes she’s stepped out with no bra and a lightweight shirt which might show her nips, she lets her hair down and flips it forward. Problem solved!
 
Kumquatqueen said:
Triple letters don't necessarily mean very big - just that American bras go D, DD, DDD, then E, EE, EEE, F etc, as opposed to D, DD, E, EE, F, FF, G.

The late Lolo Ferrari from Eurotrash TV had the biggest implants in the world at the time, suggest on Wiki as 36T or 36MMM. Shame she was still unhappy.
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They coincide with bust size.
theWollstonecraftWoman said:
Seriously, what is all the fascination with boobies?
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Because boobs.
 
theWollstonecraftWoman said:
Seriously, what is all the fascination with boobies?
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Well, I can't speak for lesbians, but as a heterosexual male here's my list: They are soft and firm all at the same time and feel so damned good in the hand. And kissing them is heaven. If you suck on a nipple (that in itself is a fabulous sensation on my part) then blow on it, it crinkles and stands up, such fun! They are photogenic and the shape and size (no matter what that is) is pleasing to my eye. Maybe it's 'cause I was breast fed as a baby. Maybe it's 'cause I'm a randy, lecherous old man ( I was just as lecherous in my youth though). Maybe, maybe, maybe...all I know is I likes 'em, all of 'em, a lot!

Comshaw
 
Comshaw said:
Well, I can't speak for lesbians, but as a heterosexual male here's my list: They are soft and firm all at the same time and feel so damned good in the hand. And kissing them is heaven. If you suck on a nipple (that in itself is a fabulous sensation on my part) then blow on it, it crinkles and stands up, such fun! They are photogenic and the shape and size (no matter what that is) is pleasing to my eye. Maybe it's 'cause I was breast fed as a baby. Maybe it's 'cause I'm a randy, lecherous old man ( I was just as lecherous in my youth though). Maybe, maybe, maybe...all I know is I likes 'em, all of 'em, a lot!

Comshaw
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I'm not a lesbian! I'm a Jew, married to a black man. :eek: 👄
 
theWollstonecraftWoman said:
I'm not a lesbian! I'm a Jew, married to a black man. :eek: 👄
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Sorry, you misunderstood me, or I wasn't clear in what I said. I wasn't meaning you were a lesbian. I just didn't want my post to read like I thought I knew how a lesbian thinks about or admires the female breast. I was speaking for only this old lecherous male.

Comshaw
 
Comshaw said:
Sorry, you misunderstood me, or I wasn't clear in what I said. I wasn't meaning you were a lesbian. I just didn't want my post to read like I thought I knew how a lesbian thinks about or admires the female breast. I was speaking for only this old lecherous male.

Comshaw
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Just fucking with you, friend.
 
AllenWoody said:
Your comment on cock size made me realize something, though. I write female characters with a variety of body types/breast sizes, but I NEVER write a male main character with anything less than an above average cock. Not that I provide measurements, but I make it clear they aren't small.
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Not just you. I can't recall ever coming across a description of a penis in a story here that was smaller than average, but breasts come in every size from golf balls to watermelons.


Clearly there is no perfect breast size, and sometimes less is more when it comes to description. I get turned on when they are described as being like large grapefruits or canteloupes, big enough to hold with both hands, or somewhere around a 42D if a bra size is mentioned, but not everyone is attracted to bbws like I am. On the flipside, it takes something away when a description of a character resets my mental vision that was drifting towards what I wanted it to be back to the tiny girl the author was envisioning.
 
Comshaw said:
Well, I can't speak for lesbians, but as a heterosexual male here's my list: They are soft and firm all at the same time and feel so damned good in the hand. And kissing them is heaven. If you suck on a nipple (that in itself is a fabulous sensation on my part) then blow on it, it crinkles and stands up, such fun! They are photogenic and the shape and size (no matter what that is) is pleasing to my eye. Maybe it's 'cause I was breast fed as a baby. Maybe it's 'cause I'm a randy, lecherous old man ( I was just as lecherous in my youth though). Maybe, maybe, maybe...all I know is I likes 'em, all of 'em, a lot!

Comshaw
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I find it interesting that a self-proclaimed Vagitarian would have such an affinity for boobs…
 
All right then, so what about perfect breast size?

This thread was started in the author's hangout about ideal breast size in stories. First, ideal breast size is wildly subjective. Then the OP went on to list various celebrities whom he believes to have the most perfect tits. Well, the topic and how it has been presented barely scrapes by as even qualifying for a thread in AH, as the notion of one hard-wired (get it?) ideal breast size in stories generally is ridiculous and the vast majority would agree as many in this thread indeed already have. This topic would be better off in the playground or something.

But all right, respecting this thread at its face value in a writing forum, as I did, I responded from a literary standpoint. The OP's assertion from a literary standpoint is that the women in all of his stories should have a certain ideal sized chest. This is to say that when he sits down to formulate a new story idea, it is paramount from the get-go to ensure a 34C chest for his heroine right along side any other such important elements as plot, motive, character dynamics or development, heck even genre. His plot centers around a specific bra size and yet I'm expected to take this plot seriously? Does it take place in a lingerie store? Is the story about a wet tee contest? It really smacks as nothing more than a fetish, and a dead simple one at that (sheesh, not even a golden shower?). Not that there's anything wrong with that, but it sounds like a cheap stroker to me, and so it likely would to pretty much any serious writer. "So tell me about your story." "Well, it's about this girl and she has a perfect rack." "And then what?" "Well ... what do you mean? It's just perfect, a 34C! What more do you want?" "Gee, put it that way I'm sold! Five stars!" So you see, from a purely literary standpoint my hackdom comments are more than fair.

Think about it from the reader's point of view. People search stories for a multitude of kinks and notions. If one is simply looking for a story where the most important feature is a chest to fill a certain sized bra, would it not be easier to just search a porn gif site? Better yet, wouldn't time be better spent perusing tinder to actually get to flirt with your 'perfect' pair of boobs? There are millions of 34C chests out there after all. Why fantasize?

Now let us not get sidetracked further by the majority of the replies who have also misunderstood the OP. They all offer their expertise on how to actually describe the size of breasts in stories, usually without having to resort to the old bust-and-cup measurements. That's fine. More than fine actually, certainly a worthy topic to discuss on an erotic literary forum. Indeed dozens of threads do exist already on the topic where many writers share their tips on how to be creative with bodily descriptions, all very much worthwhile discussions. But although the OP may have engaged them in that discussion as the thread progressed, that is clearly not what he started this thread for. He even admitted so with a backtrack at some point. He made no mention at all of descriptions, only how big should your heroine's unicorn's tits be, asking all of us what measurements make a character sexy or not. I suppose that his female characters don't actually act sexy? I mean why should they? At 34C they're perfectly sexy as is, right? Anything else would be overkill. Wow, writing smut is so much easier than I thought! All along I've been thinking that I needed strong characters with a dynamic of certain tension that I can weave a steamy imagination throughout. Turns out all I need is the right sized melons - acne crooked teeth and hairy feet be damned!

"Summing up, the plot was non-existent, the characters were cardboard cutouts with no spark nor sizzle between them and even the pizza delivery premise was blandly convenient for inexplicably getting lucky. However, amidst all this eye-rolling rubbish, the chick had 34C breasts, so five stars it is!"

And somehow someone wonders why I might suggest that such methods are hack.

But that's all right. We can write plotless unicorn fapsheets and delude ourselves with Red H responses from readers too dumb to browse gifs (not that all readers are that dumb by any means but the ones who vote this sort of stuff up likely are). If you think that that makes us better writers than anyone else, then not only are we flirting with hackdom, we're also an arrogant fools whose writing will never improve.
 
A pair of Great Tits

kjttmeis-2-foto-shutterstock-ntb-scanpix-kopi.jpg
 
pink_silk_glove said:
All right then, so what about perfect breast size?

This thread was started in the author's hangout about ideal breast size in stories. First, ideal breast size is wildly subjective. Then the OP went on to list various celebrities whom he believes to have the most perfect tits. Well, the topic and how it has been presented barely scrapes by as even qualifying for a thread in AH, as the notion of one hard-wired (get it?) ideal breast size in stories generally is ridiculous and the vast majority would agree as many in this thread indeed already have. This topic would be better off in the playground or something.

But all right, respecting this thread at its face value in a writing forum, as I did, I responded from a literary standpoint. The OP's assertion from a literary standpoint is that the women in all of his stories should have a certain ideal sized chest. This is to say that when he sits down to formulate a new story idea, it is paramount from the get-go to ensure a 34C chest for his heroine right along side any other such important elements as plot, motive, character dynamics or development, heck even genre. His plot centers around a specific bra size and yet I'm expected to take this plot seriously? Does it take place in a lingerie store? Is the story about a wet tee contest? It really smacks as nothing more than a fetish, and a dead simple one at that (sheesh, not even a golden shower?). Not that there's anything wrong with that, but it sounds like a cheap stroker to me, and so it likely would to pretty much any serious writer. "So tell me about your story." "Well, it's about this girl and she has a perfect rack." "And then what?" "Well ... what do you mean? It's just perfect, a 34C! What more do you want?" "Gee, put it that way I'm sold! Five stars!" So you see, from a purely literary standpoint my hackdom comments are more than fair.

Think about it from the reader's point of view. People search stories for a multitude of kinks and notions. If one is simply looking for a story where the most important feature is a chest to fill a certain sized bra, would it not be easier to just search a porn gif site? Better yet, wouldn't time be better spent perusing tinder to actually get to flirt with your 'perfect' pair of boobs? There are millions of 34C chests out there after all. Why fantasize?

Now let us not get sidetracked further by the majority of the replies who have also misunderstood the OP. They all offer their expertise on how to actually describe the size of breasts in stories, usually without having to resort to the old bust-and-cup measurements. That's fine. More than fine actually, certainly a worthy topic to discuss on an erotic literary forum. Indeed dozens of threads do exist already on the topic where many writers share their tips on how to be creative with bodily descriptions, all very much worthwhile discussions. But although the OP may have engaged them in that discussion as the thread progressed, that is clearly not what he started this thread for. He even admitted so with a backtrack at some point. He made no mention at all of descriptions, only how big should your heroine's unicorn's tits be, asking all of us what measurements make a character sexy or not. I suppose that his female characters don't actually act sexy? I mean why should they? At 34C they're perfectly sexy as is, right? Anything else would be overkill. Wow, writing smut is so much easier than I thought! All along I've been thinking that I needed strong characters with a dynamic of certain tension that I can weave a steamy imagination throughout. Turns out all I need is the right sized melons - acne crooked teeth and hairy feet be damned!

"Summing up, the plot was non-existent, the characters were cardboard cutouts with no spark nor sizzle between them and even the pizza delivery premise was blandly convenient for inexplicably getting lucky. However, amidst all this eye-rolling rubbish, the chick had 34C breasts, so five stars it is!"

And somehow someone wonders why I might suggest that such methods are hack.

But that's all right. We can write plotless unicorn fapsheets and delude ourselves with Red H responses from readers too dumb to browse gifs (not that all readers are that dumb by any means but the ones who vote this sort of stuff up likely are). If you think that that makes us better writers than anyone else, then not only are we flirting with hackdom, we're also an arrogant fools whose writing will never improve.
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🥱😴
 
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