Choking

[Pornofan420]

Breath play

Back when we were much more active in the BDSM scene, my future wife and I were at a party in Seattle in the basement of a BDSM-friendly cafe' called "Beyond The Edge" (I hear now sadly defunct).

One couple playing that night were a huge, barrel-chested bear of a guy with a thick but trimmed black beard and his sub, short, curvey in all the right ways, with long straight black hair, wearing nothing but a pair of black silk panties. They were quite a pretty pair.

At one point during the evening they got into a little breath play. He was sitting against the wall in a chair, she sitting on his lap. Slowly, his right hand moved up and covered her mouth and nose as he leaned back and hugged her to him, her last inhale soundling willing, but not eager.

I remember seeing her eyes close slowly in a gesture that to me read as "I will not freak out, I will not freak out..." He was whispering gently in her ear, what I could not hear, but I could tell he was intoning soothing things to her.

Not that they seemed to do a damn bit of good because after a few seconds she began to bounce with a fidgety energy in his lap. Moments later, her eyes shot open. The show had begun.

Unable to keep her hands on her lap, they shot up to her face in an attempt to bat his away from her mouth. He had a firm, practiced grip on her that kept his hand clamped down firmly while allowing a surprising ammount of writhing.

And writhe she did. I remember her eyes wide open with a frantic look, verging on panic as she squirmed in his lap, tried to turn her head to the side only to be denied by her lover's grip. I remember seeing her heavy breasts sway back and forth somewhat violently as she fought, and fought hard. There was what looked like real panic in her eyes. Not the sort of "I don't trust this guy I'm with, he may do me harm" energy, but a plain lizard-brain level animal response of "NO AIR, ENGAGE FRAK OUT MODE". One could hear the faint, pleas that escaped his hand, muffled and desperate. Her tiny hands tried to pry his comparably huge paw away from her mouth but to no avail.

[Just remembering this and typing it, I find myself both hard and holding my breath]

Finally, as she arched her back and madly flailed her arms out like a drowning woman who can see the surface but who's still somehow held just beneath the surface, with much of the room watching, he splayed open his hand and she gasped, urgently, sucking in as much air as her lungs would take, crying out and collapsing into his lap, then just panting there.

They went through this routine several more times and each time I thought it was one of the hottest things I'd seen all night.

Safe? Probably safer than a carotid choke. They were a longtime couple and experienced players, so I wasn't about to tell them what to do.

Hot? I still jerk off to that image. Maybe I should write it up as a story.

Personally, I do a lot of breath play fantasy, but not a whole lot IRL, with the exception that when I'm going down on my darling wife and I'm under the covers, I do like to hold by breath for as long as I can while I'm licking her.

 

[Mr Blonde]

Pornofan420: A very nice description but again not something that interests me in real life.

....but it did remind me of something along the lines of "breath play". I had a lover who enjoyed nitrous/whippets on occasion. She wanted to experience an orgasm while holding a balloon's worth of nitrous in her lungs. I would bring her there manually or with a toy and she would inhale when she began to expect the orgasm. She said it was a very nice experience and we did this a few dozen times during our relationship.

Clearing "whippet-orgasm" is not asphyxiation, but I suppose this is the best thread to mention my witty and fascinating story. LOL

 

[Etoile]

Pornofan420: A very nice description but again not something that interests me in real life.

....but it did remind me of something along the lines of "breath play". I had a lover who enjoyed nitrous/whippets on occasion. She wanted to experience an orgasm while holding a balloon's worth of nitrous in her lungs. I would bring her there manually or with a toy and she would inhale when she began to expect the orgasm. She said it was a very nice experience and we did this a few dozen times during our relationship.

Clearing "whippet-orgasm" is not asphyxiation, but I suppose this is the best thread to mention my witty and fascinating story. LOL

Wow, I've found that to be essentially impossible. I do whippits sometimes myself, and the high is so short that I can't imagine timing it perfectly enough to have an orgasm in the middle. I also find the high satisfying enough itself - it would be a waste of an orgasm, IMHO.

 

[blueyedheartbandit]

re: choking

*shudders...shudders again* Just simply reading the topic had me shivering in my shoes *grins*
My hubby, who also happens to be my Sadist has experience with this. He was in the military for 7 years and was taught the art of take downs, which included how to apply pressure to the throat so that one felt like they have their air cut off. Indeed, I can still breath, but it Feels as though I cannot. Pressure points are wonderful things. I'll have to see if he can properly explain how to do it and post it here for the inquisitive ones.
Doing almost anything we do is dangerous, I had a friend who is very into knife play. During a scene with her Dom, she moved when she shouldn't have and ended up having stitches in her shoulder. RACK.. Risk Aware Consensual Kink...KNOW what you are doing is potentially dangerous, LEARN all you can about it before you ever try it, and ALWAYS keep your mind on what you are doing. We never play if either of us is worried about something else, or upset about something. Distractions are NOT something you need at this time.
I have found breath play to be a wonderous thing, highly erotic and sensual. It takes a great deal of trust, but then again, doesn't everything in this lifestyle?
As for the hoods with no holes...not my cup of tea, I'm claustraphobic But I have seen a mummification where all the girl had to breath out of was a tube from a snorkel set. The ones playing with her did breath play as well, putting their hand over the tube and so forth...she loved it *wicked grins*.
Just be careful with anything you do, and remember you could get hurt doing anything, from something as minor as a rope burn to as drastic as losing your life...but then again...isn't that part of the appeal? The unknown? The thrill of the maybe's? hmmm.

Bandits heart boo

 

[littleg~rl]

I love this feeling of breath play. Not chocking but breath restriction, I want it more and more. in saying this my Dom has been in special forces, martial arts etc so has significant training in holds and pressure etc.

Yes its about trust, I read that when your breath is restricted that it is close to the breathing you have when you cum.

I would never try doing to myself i.e. bag over head, for me much too dangerous. I like it to be done by the one I trust.


Warm Regards

 

[Telafio]

Not that I've tried it. I would think that as this is so close to stealings ones life. This would be the ultimate show of trust in ones Mistress though.

 

[Etoile]

Interesting thread to see bumped considering what happened this weekend.

Daddy and I were fucking with em on top. E knows I like being held down, and lately eir favorite way to do that is by putting eir hand over my face and putting enough weight on it to hold me down. E usually positions eir hand so it's mostly over my nose and mouth, though because of contours I can still breathe - though not easily.

At one point eir hands were on either side of my shoulders, and I touched eir wrist lightly and pressed it toward my throat. E got the picture immediately and put eir hand on my neck, with the fingers all on one side and the thumb on the other. This actually resulted in a rather large mark when we were through. E also put both hands around my neck in a classic strangulation. All of this was magic to me, for the danger aspect (though strangulation and choking are not the same thing as asphyxiation - the latter doesn't stop when the person passes out) and for the rape elements.

During the double-hand strangulation I did start to black out more than I wanted to, and I whapped Daddy lightly on the arm. E eased up a bit and my vision came back.

It was quite a lot of fun.

 

[MastrJ]

My sub's neck is very sensitive. Just the weight of her leash on the collar is enough to make her feel like she is being choked when we lay down next to each other. So choking isn't something I would think about trying. However, I do often put my hand on her neck as it is very sensitive and just feeling my fingertips run across her neck can get her going.

 

[veebee1]

this happened to me too

I had a Dom once grab my throat and squeeze, lightly cutting off air. I panicked - this is a hard limit for me, as I'm terrified of not being able to breathe - and kicked him, hard. He released me and apologized, and said he thought it was something I might like to try.

Not something I'm into, nor do I wish to be "introduced" to it. It terrifies me.

The trachea is very fragile and easily damaged and its hard to say your safe word when you can't breathe.

 

[sigsauerprinces]

everyone who is into the idea of breath play/being choked should read this article by jay wiseman about breath play.

i'll admit to being really turned on by the idea of being choked, but after reading his article, i will never do it, other than a light, hands on throat type of thing.NO pressure and no restriction of air.

mr wiseman used to be an EMT, and he knows what he's talking about. apparently any restriction of air at all causes the heart to act in funny ways because its not getting enough oxygen. the heart starts "throwing pvcs" which can make it go into an abnormal rythym and one can go into a heart attack, yes, from being choked. of course there is the damage of a stroke or that type of accident, but there is also the danger of the person suffering a cardiac arrest and dying. im big on edge play but this one is just way off limits to me and honestly i think it should be with anyone. its equilvalent to putting three bullets in a revlover, spinning the thingie (yes i said thingie), putting it to yr subs head, and pulling the trigger.


article: http://members.aol.com/Oldrope/breath.htm

 

[Netzach]

Here's my thought on Wiseman and breath play.

There's only been one documented death by choking in the entire history of international Judo sports, I have on good authority.

A sport/martial art marked by choking your opponent to blackout.

Obviously there's a way to do it safely. I have no idea what it is, and those who think they know it but don't are playing with fire/bullets/disaster analogy of choice. But there is a way to do this minimizing risk. Wiseman's even a judo player.

What bothers me is that he'd rather sound the alarm bells on the assumption that nobody could *learn* to do this more safely, as he probably did himself, as a judo player!

The cult of liability has really dampened written SM education I think. Find me a source for learning full suspension rope bondage. None. Midori has an excellent written guide to partial suspensions, but if you want to learn full suspensions, go to a demo. Ok, I have no issue with that, and demos are good, assuming your demonstrator knows what they're doing.

Someone at some point learned this stuff without a tutor, and found a way to do it without killing people, though.

 

[veebee1]

True

everyone who is into the idea of breath play/being choked should read this article by jay wiseman about breath play.

i'll admit to being really turned on by the idea of being choked, but after reading his article, i will never do it, other than a light, hands on throat type of thing.NO pressure and no restriction of air.

mr wiseman used to be an EMT, and he knows what he's talking about. apparently any restriction of air at all causes the heart to act in funny ways because its not getting enough oxygen. the heart starts "throwing pvcs" which can make it go into an abnormal rythym and one can go into a heart attack, yes, from being choked. of course there is the damage of a stroke or that type of accident, but there is also the danger of the person suffering a cardiac arrest and dying. im big on edge play but this one is just way off limits to me and honestly i think it should be with anyone. its equilvalent to putting three bullets in a revlover, spinning the thingie (yes i said thingie), putting it to yr subs head, and pulling the trigger.


article: http://members.aol.com/Oldrope/breath.htm

Thanks for providing the link to this article. I also have PVCs (irregular heart rhythm) that I have to take medication for. When my heart throws a PVC, I go into tachycardia (high heart rate). The PVCs are not lethal, but the tachycardia can be. The heart can begin to beat so quickly that it goes into a quiver and cause sudden death. Breath play can be dangerous for me. Just something else to think about for those who have heart conditions.

 

[sigsauerprinces]

Here's my thought on Wiseman and breath play.

There's only been one documented death by choking in the entire history of international Judo sports, I have on good authority.

A sport/martial art marked by choking your opponent to blackout.

Obviously there's a way to do it safely. I have no idea what it is, and those who think they know it but don't are playing with fire/bullets/disaster analogy of choice. But there is a way to do this minimizing risk. Wiseman's even a judo player.

What bothers me is that he'd rather sound the alarm bells on the assumption that nobody could *learn* to do this more safely, as he probably did himself, as a judo player!

The cult of liability has really dampened written SM education I think. Find me a source for learning full suspension rope bondage. None. Midori has an excellent written guide to partial suspensions, but if you want to learn full suspensions, go to a demo. Ok, I have no issue with that, and demos are good, assuming your demonstrator knows what they're doing.

Someone at some point learned this stuff without a tutor, and found a way to do it without killing people, though.

well i guess we disagree then, huh?

i DO find it as dangerous as someone playing russian roulette. you dont-thats great for you. but i do, and so do others, including mer wiseman, who isnt exactly an SM alarmist.. i was trying to inform ppl -give them antoher view point-more information to look over. i dont know why you bring suspension and rope bondage into the mix-those have nothing to do with choking that i can see, other than to muddy the issue.

its nice that theres only been one documented death from judo choking, but we werent exactly talking about judo choking here, were we?-as in ppl who are trained. we're talking about Dom/mes choking ppl with no training at all-or perhaps a little training, which is maybe even worse. two different things, i would think. and one vastly more dangerous than the other.

i dont think its being alarmist to warn ppl of a potential problem. what they do with the information is up to them.

veebee1-you're welcome. i have a similar heart problem, tho the drs have no name for whta happens to me yet..my heart will just start beating fast for no reason at all. im curious-if you dont mind me asking-what happens when yr heart throws a pvc..does it simply speed up out of the blue? does something trigger it? and how were you diagnosed? if this is too personal pm me or dont answer, ill understand..but im genuinely curious as ive had a heart problem that sounds similar to yours for about 5 years now.

 

[veebee1]

PVCs

sigsauerprinces,

I'm happy to provide information on my condition. To begin with, everyone has PVCs, however, most people don't feel them. I am one of those who can feel them. They are just like palpatations, but it felt like someone was thumping me in the chest. Whenever the PVC (premature ventricular contraction) would occur, my heart rate would race to twice the rate of a normal resting heart rate, 163 or more. This was the part that was dangerous. The resting heart rate should only be around 70 - 80 beats per minute for a healthy resting heart. The only way this could be diagnosed was to be put on a halter monitor, which I had to wear for 24 - 48 hours. When the PVC occurred, I had to press a button on the monitor to start recording the event.

PVC's are sort of like an electrical problem. The ventricle beats before it is suppose to so it overfills with blood and then has to pump harder to push out the extra blood, and it is at that point that the palpatation is felt. In addition, the palpatation would occur at any given time, but seemed to be increased during phsycial exertion. So I never really knew when it would happen. Sometimes my heart rate would speed up so fast that I felt faint and dizzy.

Hope this helps and I hope they are able to help you with your problem soon. My problem made me feel tired and sluggish all the time. I have been on Toporal now since 1991 and doing well. If I become too over stressed or miss my medication, my heart has no problem telling me about it. Again, this is not a lethal problem, but if I stopped taking the medication, it could be fatal.

Good luck, dear.

Vee

 

[RadicalFlower]

hello

i am so curious What does choking and haveing a good orgasian Have in common ..I mean what does it do for the Orgasiam??

i have been wanting to try ..But was afraid my partner would forget and start going crazy of something.and end up choking me to death..

 

[Netzach]

well i guess we disagree then, huh?

i DO find it as dangerous as someone playing russian roulette. you dont-thats great for you. but i do, and so do others, including mer wiseman, who isnt exactly an SM alarmist.. i was trying to inform ppl -give them antoher view point-more information to look over. i dont know why you bring suspension and rope bondage into the mix-those have nothing to do with choking that i can see, other than to muddy the issue.

its nice that theres only been one documented death from judo choking, but we werent exactly talking about judo choking here, were we?-as in ppl who are trained. we're talking about Dom/mes choking ppl with no training at all-or perhaps a little training, which is maybe even worse. two different things, i would think. and one vastly more dangerous than the other.

i dont think its being alarmist to warn ppl of a potential problem. what they do with the information is up to them.

Ok, for the record, I don't engage in breathplay because of the liability and because I don't feel skilled in a way to manage outcomes, precisely for the reasons outlined in this article.

I've also followed the trail of this article, a bit. It's probably one of the most divisive, argued over, fought over things to materialize in the contemporary SM "canon" for lack of a better word.

I think it's irresponsible to write about a high-risk erotic behavior with "don't do it" as the only message. Fact is, people are going to do it anyway. Maybe there's not a good way to minimize the risk, but it's like telling people not to fuck because they might get AIDS. There may be no "condom" equivalent for breath play, but the fact remains -- people are going to continue to do it.
If it gets people off, they will risk death, it's just a given.

So if there is ANY way to minmize the risk, as evidenced by judo players, who I see as fairly relevant for this reason, maybe that should be put on the table, not hidden because someone, somewhere, is not capable of putting on their "condom" correctly.

 

[Etoile]

hello

i am so curious What does choking and haveing a good orgasian Have in common ..I mean what does it do for the Orgasiam??

i have been wanting to try ..But was afraid my partner would forget and start going crazy of something.and end up choking me to death..

I've never been able to time it that well; then again my sex with Daddy is more about eir pleasure than mine. Choking is something we both like (the only reason I nudged eir hand to my throat last Sunday is because e hadn't thought of it yet), and I don't get to have many orgasms with em at all, so it hasn't been like that for me.

Unless your partner already has a tendency toward insanity or schizophrenia, it's virtually impossible for him or her to forget and choke you to death. If your partner does have mental issues - including dissociation - you probably shouldn't try this just because he or she might not be able to control his or her actions if a psychotic episode occurs.

 

[RadicalFlower]

Well i meant so excited that he would Squeeze Tighter..Ok i was just wondering thanks..*S*


i didnt mean it in that aspect of crazy sorry *S*..I meant Excited crazy ....*blush*

 

[Etoile]

I don't think you have anything to worry about. Have you asked him if it's something he would like to try?

 

[RadicalFlower]

No i havent really..i am afraid he will look at me like i am nuts LOL
Does it make the Orgasiam More intense or something?

 

[Justina123]

At one point during the evening they got into a little breath play. He was sitting against the wall in a chair, she sitting on his lap. Slowly, his right hand moved up and covered her mouth and nose as he leaned back and hugged her to him, her last inhale soundling willing, but not eager.

I remember seeing her eyes close slowly in a gesture that to me read as "I will not freak out, I will not freak out..." He was whispering gently in her ear, what I could not hear, but I could tell he was intoning soothing things to her.

Not that they seemed to do a damn bit of good because after a few seconds she began to bounce with a fidgety energy in his lap. Moments later, her eyes shot open. The show had begun.

Unable to keep her hands on her lap, they shot up to her face in an attempt to bat his away from her mouth. He had a firm, practiced grip on her that kept his hand clamped down firmly while allowing a surprising ammount of writhing.

And writhe she did. I remember her eyes wide open with a frantic look, verging on panic as she squirmed in his lap, tried to turn her head to the side only to be denied by her lover's grip. I remember seeing her heavy breasts sway back and forth somewhat violently as she fought, and fought hard. There was what looked like real panic in her eyes. Not the sort of "I don't trust this guy I'm with, he may do me harm" energy, but a plain lizard-brain level animal response of "NO AIR, ENGAGE FRAK OUT MODE". One could hear the faint, pleas that escaped his hand, muffled and desperate. Her tiny hands tried to pry his comparably huge paw away from her mouth but to no avail.

[Just remembering this and typing it, I find myself both hard and holding my breath]

Finally, as she arched her back and madly flailed her arms out like a drowning woman who can see the surface but who's still somehow held just beneath the surface, with much of the room watching, he splayed open his hand and she gasped, urgently, sucking in as much air as her lungs would take, crying out and collapsing into his lap, then just panting there.

I LOVE this description, this is exactly the kind of breath play Sir and I enjoy. (He has never done any kind of choke hold or neck grip.) Yup, when he first covers my hand and nose I keep telling myself, "I will stay calm..." etc. but after a bit it just always seems to become this natural reaction to squirm. But any time he does this, I still tell myself "THIS time I'll stay calm..." We find it extremely erotic and it's no more dangerous than many other s/m activities, or than driving a car, for that matter!

-justina

 

[Toshbia]

Choking/ Breathplay

I Dont know if like to do the breath/play or not. I have read about
it and see some poeple enjoy it alot while makeing love.

I Dont know how or what it feels likes. But would like to learn if
only i had someone that knows what they are doing. I think it might be high pleasureable to feel what kind of a oragmas I
could get on breath /play. But I need someone that can teach
me it too. I dont want someone that will go so far know when not
to stop But i like to try and see what would happen.

I have done some kinds of bondage ...but breath/play i have not or have He would cover my mouth and hold my noes but he told me to get a big deep breath and then he would hold my mouth
and pinch my nose closed.... not for long i would say about 55 sec
for the few times we did that.

Then he would ask me to rest then start brearth /play i said yes
i will try it onces more So he gave me time to get read for the
breath/play he took his hands and touch my throat and gave a little squeeze not to hurt me he told you will feel your air way slowy being cut off with each breath.

I did have a collar on at the time he told just relax dont fight the
collar as we do the breath/play.... but i could feel my body
tighten when he did this . I was not scared of him.

He slowy moved his hand to my face and said now you will feel
your air way slowy tighten i did...... with each breath of air i took

And he told ok you last breath is comeing for breath/play he ask me if was ready i said yes so he took his other hand and covered my mouth an nose .

He said will watch you an make sure your ok. He did that as he
promied.
He said will let you squarm a little if it was to much he would stop and let me chatch my breath .
By getting three of four breath he would do it more untill i had my
hard's oragmas that was on the third time around

So yes breath/play dose work on hard hard orgams. When i was done i felt so good .....

But like you all say dont do this with someone that never done it..

this was long ago when i did breath/play ....... but i know its change with new things so if any one wants to teach me new
breath/play let me know e-mail or leave something on the boards

 

[Guest]

Actually I really enjoy it. I never believed that I did until a Dom that I was with told me that when I orgasm that I actually hold my breath, I thought it was odd until I actually paid attention to it one day and was alittle shocked. Since then I have had a few try with me and as long as they are extremely and I mean extremely careful I like it.

 

[Toshbia]

breath/play

I know what you mean alway becareful... But have read it .. I am still trying to learn if thing have change on the breath /play I dont know if i am out of training or not its been a long time i just cant trust and one. i need to know the person for a while ........ more i read of it the more it's truning me on.

 

[Toshbia]

breath/play

I think that breath/play is really neat .I have tryed it with my frined boyfriend he would tell me to just relax and not fight it so i did and he would work with me on it. At frist i was a little scared who would not be? He would slow touch my neck an talk to me saying ever thing will be ok. But it was ok but i wanted to have my own man teaching me or good friend that will help more . Do you think its right to have someone boyfriend or girfriend help teach on the breath/play ?