Corrupt Wish

[smoochypig]

I wish that sleep was routine, rather than something that visists when it wishes

Granted; You now fall asleep everytime you get even remotely aroused.

I wish back pain was a more pleasurable sensation.

 

[doormouse]

Granted; You now fall asleep everytime you get even remotely aroused.

I wish back pain was a more pleasurable sensation.

Granted, but now everytime you get a back spasm you also have an orgasm and pee your pants.

I wish this storm was over.

 

[fifty5]

I wish this storm was over.

Granted, but before it was, the lightening got you!

I wish my cuddly puppies were cuddly girls

 

[doormouse]

I wish my cuddly puppies were cuddly girls

Granted, but they're lesbians and hate men.

I wish this wind would stop it's scary.

 

[fifty5]

I wish this wind would stop it's scary.

Granted, but instead of meteorolgical wind, you get physiological wind - and fart yourself silly!

I wish the puppies were finally, properly house-trained already

 

[doormouse]

Granted, but instead of meteorolgical wind, you get physiological wind - and fart yourself silly!

I wish the puppies were finally, properly house-trained already

LOL

Granted, but now the puppies have taken over the house. They've stolen the TV remote, drank all your beer, eaten all the food and taken over the sofa. You are forced to sleep in the dog house (literally).

I wish my CD player would stop jumping*sigh*

 

[fifty5]

LOL

Granted, but now the puppies have taken over the house. They've stolen the TV remote, drank all your beer, eaten all the food and taken over the sofa. You are forced to sleep in the dog house (literally).

I wish my CD player would stop jumping*sigh*

Granted - it won't play anything at all...

I wish I had 3 wishes

 

[doormouse]

Granted - it won't play anything at all...

I wish I had 3 wishes

Granted, but now instead of being corrupt wishes, you relive your three worst sexual experiences over and over until your cock falls off. (sorry couldn't think of anything else lol)

I wish my boss would get off my back and leave my friends alone if they don't want to sign up to sing (venting lol)

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted, but now instead of being corrupt wishes, you relive your three worst sexual experiences over and over until your cock falls off. (sorry couldn't think of anything else lol)

I wish my boss would get off my back and leave my friends alone if they don't want to sign up to sing (venting lol)

Granted, he does, but only because he's fired you.

I wish I had the most perfect chocolate truffle in the world.

 

[fifty5]

I wish I had the most perfect chocolate truffle in the world.

Granted, but it's sealed in cold-cast plastic.

I wish my car had a new handle on the driver's door and the original key still fitted.

 

[doormouse]

Granted, but it's sealed in cold-cast plastic.

I wish my car had a new handle on the driver's door and the original key still fitted.

Granted, but now it needs new brakes, a new engine, and the interior has deteriorated.

I wish it wasn't morning already.

 

[Liar]

Granted, but now it needs new brakes, a new engine, and the interior has deteriorated.

I wish it wasn't morning already.

Granted, it's evening. Over here.

I wish I didn't have to write a fucking school paper just about now.

 

[fifty5]

I wish I didn't have to write a fucking school paper just about now.

Granted - you've flunked and been thrown out, so of course you don't have to write it!

I wish it was as easy to think of new wishes as it is to corrupt the ones that are poseted...

 

[doormouse]

I wish it was as easy to think of new wishes as it is to corrupt the ones that are poseted...

Granted, but you grow up to be a lonely old wanna be with all these dreams in your head and no motivation.

I wish I had a maid.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted, but you grow up to be a lonely old wanna be with all these dreams in your head and no motivation.

I wish I had a maid.

Granted. It's Maid Marion and she really gets on your nerves babbling about Robin's "quarterstaff" all day long while she does no housework.

I wish someone would cook me a delicious, sumptuous dinner that I got to enjoy peacefully and with no interuptions.

Shanglan

 

[OhMissScarlett]

Granted. It's Maid Marion and she really gets on your nerves babbling about Robin's "quarterstaff" all day long while she does no housework.

I wish someone would cook me a delicious, sumptuous dinner that I got to enjoy peacefully and with no interuptions.

Shanglan

Granted, but it's me cooking for you and I don't like to do dishes, so your kitchen is a total disaster when I'm through.

I wish I had a free and quality babysitter for about a week.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Granted, but it's me cooking for you and I don't like to do dishes, so your kitchen is a total disaster when I'm through.

I wish I had a free and quality babysitter for about a week.

Granted. Unfortunately, that was the last you saw of your husband...

I wish my dinner would cook itself, so I didn't have to get off this chair to go and cook it.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

Granted. Unfortunately, that was the last you saw of your husband...

I wish my dinner would cook itself, so I didn't have to get off this chair to go and cook it.

Now that would be a great vacation.

Granted. Your dinner cooks itself, but your dinner, as it turns out is not such a great cook and you wind up having to eat something gross.

I wish my yard didn't turn into a swamp every time it rained.

 

[doormouse]

Now that would be a great vacation.



I wish my yard didn't turn into a swamp every time it rained.

Granted, now everytime it rains, it rains cats and dogs and you end up with a yard full of animals who use your garden as a toilet.

I wish I could sleep in.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Granted, now everytime it rains, it rains cats and dogs and you end up with a yard full of animals who use your garden as a toilet.

I wish I could sleep in.

Granted. You sleep in, are late for work, and get fired. Now you can sleep in every morning.

I wish there was something better on TV besides "Charlie's Angels".

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted. You sleep in, are late for work, and get fired. Now you can sleep in every morning.

I wish there was something better on TV besides "Charlie's Angels".

Granted. In fact, you find a program so fascinating that you drop out of society and devote your life to watching it, attending conventions, talking with other fans, and writing fanfic.

I wish I had a good pair of fencing gloves.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

Granted. In fact, you find a program so fascinating that you drop out of society and devote your life to watching it, attending conventions, talking with other fans, and writing fanfic.

I wish I had a good pair of fencing gloves.

Granted, but your knickers and vest turn to jello. Can you say foiled again?

I wish I could read German.

 

[Lucifer_Carroll]

Granted, but your knickers and vest turn to jello. Can you say foiled again?

I wish I could read German.

Granted but America repeatedly nukes Germany for "shits and giggles" thus negating most of the point of reading German.

I wish I didn't feel so much ennui about my upcoming novel.

 

[fifty5]

I wish I didn't feel so much ennui about my upcoming novel.

Granted. Instead you're wound up so tight you need medication to cope...

I wish that a certain young lady would give me a real life date and let me pleasure her.

 

[doormouse]

Granted. Instead you're wound up so tight you need medication to cope...

I wish that a certain young lady would give me a real life date and let me pleasure her.

Granted, but you discover that she's really a he and hates men.

I wish my ex would leave me alone.