Corrupt Wish

[BlackShanglan]

Sorry, go TO my boy.

 

[fifty5]

Sorry, go TO my boy.

Granted. But there's a legal chalenge and ... aw shit - no-one wants to read all that!

I wish my wishes came true

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted. But there's a legal chalenge and ... aw shit - no-one wants to read all that!

I wish my wishes came true

Lord knows we'll see it all soon enough.

Granted, but all of your wishes are even more evilly corrupted than the ones on this thread.

I wish I could have four or five really good pints in a nice, dingy, music-filled Irish pub.

 

[fifty5]

I wish I could have four or five really good pints in a nice, dingy, music-filled Irish pub.

Granted - but then you're too pissed to notice that the next one is off - and gives you food-poisoning.

I wish that I could migrate to the summer hemisphere each equinox

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted - but then you're too pissed to notice that the next one is off - and gives you food-poisoning.

I wish that I could migrate to the summer hemisphere each equinox

Ah, it'd be worth it entirely.

Your wish is granted, but you migrate very slowly - just fast enough to get there on the last day of summer and start traveling all of the way back.

I wish I could see the afterlife and know what it's going to be like.

 

[fifty5]

I wish I could see the afterlife and know what it's going to be like.

Granted. Think of dreamless sleep - nothing!

I wish religion - and all superstition - hadn't been invented

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted. Think of dreamless sleep - nothing!

I wish religion - and all superstition - hadn't been invented

Granted. Then you find out that you're actually wrong, and boy, is God pissed.

[Dreamless sleep, mind you, sounds no so bad ... although right now what I crave is my only experience of what I think was morphine ...]

I wish I could have that experience again without the risk of addiction.

 

[fifty5]

I wish I could have that experience again without the risk of addiction.

Granted, but although not adictive, it turns out to be habit forming.

I wish this thread wasn't so habit forming...

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted, but although not adictive, it turns out to be habit forming.

I wish this thread wasn't so habit forming...

*laugh*

Granted. You never post again and miss all of our gems of wit.

I wish I could type better when drunk.

 

[fifty5]

*laugh*

Granted. You never post again and miss all of our gems of wit.

Oh shit!

I wish I could type better when drunk.

Granted, but your sober typing goes completely to pot

(Hmm! That's ... no, down boy. Stick to the subject!)

I wish I alcohol didn't feature so prominently in sex - it's even better when you're sober!

 

[BlackShanglan]

Oh shit!
Granted, but your sober typing goes completely to pot

(Hmm! That's ... no, down boy. Stick to the subject!)

I wish I alcohol didn't feature so prominently in sex - it's even better when you're sober!

I would wquite like that parentehical comment eplxained.

Your wish is granted, but you discover sober that oytu don't really like it.

I wish I had another Guinness.

 

[fifty5]

I would wquite like that parentehical comment eplxained.

pot... Ya know, like hash, man...

Your wish is granted, but you discover sober that oytu don't really like it.

Oh yeah? Pull the other one, or tell it to the marines!

I wish I had another Guinness.

Granted. You are standing - like I did - next to the Amanda Guinness. She's a tanker (ship type tanker) that holds gazillions of gallons of Guinness - and there's no way you can pull a pint!

I wish I had the moral strength to go to bed when it was sensible to do so (but I'm working on those thousand posts!)

 

[BlackShanglan]

pot... Ya know, like hash, man...
Oh yeah? Pull the other one, or tell it to the marines!
Granted. You are standing - like I did - next to the Amanda Guinness. She's a tanker (ship type tanker) that holds gazillions of gallons of Guinness - and there's no way you can pull a pint!

I wish I had the moral strength to go to bed when it was sensible to do so (but I'm working on those thousand posts!)

That's quite possibly the cruelest corruption yet. Fifty, you sod.

GRanted, you go to bed. I pip you to the post onthe 1000 posts and you die of terminal chargrin.

I wish I had the ability to make erotic ddreams reality.

 

[fifty5]

I wish I had the ability to make erotic dreams reality.

Granted, but the lodger steals that ability from you. (It turns out he's a tenth dan wizard...)

I wish that some Lit offers come true

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted, but the lodger steals that ability from you. (It turns out he's a tenth dan wizard...)

I wish that some Lit offers come true

Damned Lodgers.

Granted, but only the really unattractive offers come true.

I wish I had a pummelo. They taste quite nice.

 

[fifty5]

Damned Lodgers.

Granted, but only the really unattractive offers come true.

There ain't any such - hee hee!

I wish I had a pummelo. They taste quite nice.

Uh? WTF is a pummelo?

Can't progress this without that info...

I wish I knew what a pummelo is

 

[BlackShanglan]

A delicious citrus fruit bigger and sweeter than a grapefruit.

 

[doormouse]

I wish I knew what a pummelo is

Granted, but now every time it rains you get pelted with them and wish you'd never asked.

I wish my PC doesn't take long to get fixed

 

[OhMissScarlett]

Granted, but now every time it rains you get pelted with them and wish you'd never asked.

I wish my PC doesn't take long to get fixed

Granted, but getting it fixed in a flash costs you big time.

I wish I had enough funding to relocate and change my identity without being involved in the witness protection program.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted, but getting it fixed in a flash costs you big time.

I wish I had enough funding to relocate and change my identity without being involved in the witness protection program.

Granted, but you relocate to Guantanamo Bay and your identity is "cage 5 on the left hand side."

I wish I had some genuinely excellent chocolate.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

I wish I had some genuinely excellent chocolate.

Granted! But all your factory workers go out on strike carrying signs which say, "Willy Wonka is Wack-Job!"

 

[BlackShanglan]

I wish someone would resurrect this thread.

 

[Guest]

I wish someone would resurrect this thread.

granted but all the wishes re-start from the beginning and cycle through over and over leaving us all in an odd fibbonaci sequence which exponentially replicates and creates a new black hole...we are all sucked in and the world as we know it, ceases to exist.


i wish today were sunday

 

[Honey123]

granted but all the wishes re-start from the beginning and cycle through over and over leaving us all in an odd fibbonaci sequence which exponentially replicates and creates a new black hole...we are all sucked in and the world as we know it, ceases to exist.


i wish today were sunday

Granted and it's the Sunday after the Saturday after the Friday of a HUGE exam and you passed and you are now dealing with a light hangover from partying your ass off all weekend long...


I wish I had the body of a goddess, the face of a supermodel, the money of a millionaire and the brain of a rocket scientist....

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted and it's the Sunday after the Saturday after the Friday of a HUGE exam and you passed and you are now dealing with a light hangover from partying your ass off all weekend long...


I wish I had the body of a goddess, the face of a supermodel, the money of a millionaire and the brain of a rocket scientist....

(Congrats, Vella, on making my wish destroy the universe as we know it. Now that is one *corrupted* wish!)

Honey - granted. You have all of the above. You have also got, thanks to a terrible and incurable disease, the life expectancy of a mayfly.

(Or, alternatively, you have all of these things. In a bag on the floor of your bedroom. And the police are knocking rather urgently on your front door.)

I wish I had a fabulous, sumptuous, seven-course meal with wine for each course.