Dear X

[respeito]

Dear TF

I am sorry that I wasn't able to hold your interest or be the woman you wanted. But even more so, I am sorry that you felt the need to lead me on, tell me what you thought I wanted to hear and then simply disappear. A 'good bye' from you would have hurt, but I could have respected that.

Instead, the wondering and not knowing what exactly I did so wrong, that you found so unworthy - that will eat away at me for a very long time.

K

*hugs kaitlynl* i'm sorry that you've had to experience this. i've been down the very same road and no one deserves to be cast aside like that. i hope the days ahead are full of ladybugs for you

 

[kaitlynl]

Dear Wife,

I love you, I really do. And I love that you are baking something special for me.

But...I would also really like it if you thought the fact that I find you as sexy and desirable as I did 25 years ago wasn't something you rolled your eyes at.

I know, I'm not really that sexy. I'm sorry. But...well...whatever.

Signed

Still here, still wanting you...

Your wife is a lucky woman. I hope she realizes it - some women would give anything for that a loving man in their lives. Best wishes to you both.

Don't know you...but I've been there before. I know it's hard to accept, but it's true that time heals the pain. I think some guys "disappear" b/c they don't want to hurt a woman, and while it sucks...it's usually the easiest non-confrontational way they know how to handle a situation

Thank you, I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I know that he probably feels it was the best way to handle the situation, but I'm a 'need to know' kind of person, so it's hard on the self-esteem, especially with his loving and passionate words etched in my memory.

 

[Size13]

I so do not miss you and all of your issues.....

The TV and its problems of itself...

You know, It is a fucking issue in of itself.

Fuck it. Bite me Bitch. Kiss my fucking ass.

 

[kendra1980]

Dear Helga, Lucy and Doctor B,

If one has to hear such things, I'm just glad it was delivered by people such as yourselves. I think they must've hired you for your gentle spirits and good hearts. I know I benefited from them mightily today.



Dear Body Part That is doing something it should NOT.

Shame on you!

 

[Wings27]

Dear X,

I am done picking up after your ass, I'm done fixing the things you fuck up, I'm done keeping my mouth shut and I'm done letting you think that it's cute when you flounder around.

From now on I'm in charge and you will just have to deal. No more letting you control your area, I'm taking over. I don't think that you will be keeping your job either. I can't count on you for a single thing and I'm way too busy to have to patch it all together.

Either pick up the slack or you're gone.

Sincerely,
The Bitch In Charge

 

[HesterPrynne]

Dear X,

FYI ... the left lane on the highway is the "fast" lane. The speed limit is 70 mph. Both of these facts together should make you realize that doing 50 in that lane should entitle me to run into you and push you the hell out of the way with no remorse whatsoever. And you should be responsible for any and all damages.

Signed,
Little Miss Defensive

***********************************************************

Dear X,

You just made me throw up in my mouth a little.

Signed,

I'm not the only one who thinks so

************************************************************

Dear X-es,

Stay away from me with that cookie cutter. Got it?

Trying to stay original

 

[arnoldlane84]

Dear X,

FYI ... the left lane on the highway is the "fast" lane. The speed limit is 70 mph. Both of these facts together should make you realize that doing 50 in that lane should entitle me to run into you and push you the hell out of the way with no remorse whatsoever. And you should be responsible for any and all damages.

Signed,
Little Miss Defensive

Dear Little Miss Defensive,

I know what you mean... people with poor lane discipline annoys me more than anything else on the roads. Over here they like to sit in the middle lane because there's a lorry three miles down the road that they want to overtake.

It's always nice though to cruise past on their left (the fast lane's on the right over here) to make them realise how stupid they are being.

Keeping Left Unless Overtaking Litster

 

[HesterPrynne]

Dear Little Miss Defensive,

I know what you mean... people with poor lane discipline annoys me more than anything else on the roads. Over here they like to sit in the middle lane because there's a lorry three miles down the road that they want to overtake.

It's always nice though to cruise past on their left (the fast lane's on the right over here) to make them realise how stupid they are being.

Keeping Left Unless Overtaking Litster

Dear Overtaking,

Cheers, man! Drive safe ....

Can't understand how some folks passed the driver's test

 

[CallMeMistress]

Dear person who undertakes

That's bloody dangerous!

Me with hair standing on end

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear Sly Farter,

Stop already. Just because I don't hear it doesn't mean my eyes don't tear up as soon as that toxic gas wafts across my face. Just because I cannot point a finger right at you because I didn't hear it, doesn't mean I can't figure out that if there are two of us in the office and I didn't produce that foul stench then I am pretty damn sure who did.

How about getting up and walking outside and letting it rip? I get that the padded office chair acts as a sound buffer but it doesn't absorb the smell as well. I am pretty sure that if we were sitting on hardwood chairs you would hold your gaseous discharge till you were away from everyone. Otherwise if you let it rip it would sound like a thunderous applause.

Don't get me wrong I fart from time to time. I just choose to not do it in front of co_workers. If I have to do it in front of strangers then I do the fly by. I will walk briskly behind them and let it go then keep on walking. I have no desire to sit around and smell my own ass breath. I don't get why we as a human race have to wait and smell it first before running away. If your asshole burps then that air is gonna stink. You don't need to confirm it.

Just do me a favor. Quit it. I can only imagine the look on your wife's face every time she has to do your laundry.

Thanks,

Nose pinched like I am about to jump in a pool.

 

[kaitlynl]

*hugs kaitlynl* i'm sorry that you've had to experience this. i've been down the very same road and no one deserves to be cast aside like that. i hope the days ahead are full of ladybugs for you

Didn't see this the other night - thank you so much. I have found some very supportive voices here and it's nice to know there are caring people around. The man who chose to treat me so harshly doesn't know that it is his loss - I may not be perfect, but I am smart, funny, cute and one damn passionate woman with a great imagination... Too bad he forgot that before he left me hanging.

Dear Helga, Lucy and Doctor B,

If one has to hear such things, I'm just glad it was delivered by people such as yourselves. I think they must've hired you for your gentle spirits and good hearts. I know I benefited from them mightily today.



Dear Body Part That is doing something it should NOT.

Shame on you!

::hugs::

 

[arnoldlane84]

Dear Overtaking,

Cheers, man! Drive safe ....

Can't understand how some folks passed the driver's test

Will do, you too...

Dear person who undertakes

That's bloody dangerous!

Me with hair standing on end

No it's not, not if you're sensible and watch what numpty is doing. After all, he shouldn't have been there in the first place. You really think he's going to move over if he's got tunnel vision for the lorry three miles away?

 

[arnoldlane84]

*hugs kaitlynl* i'm sorry that you've had to experience this. i've been down the very same road and no one deserves to be cast aside like that. i hope the days ahead are full of ladybugs for you

Wait a minute... ladybugs?

 

[kaitlynl]

Wait a minute... ladybugs?

Ladybugs are better than spiders and snakes.

 

[arnoldlane84]

Ladybugs are better than spiders and snakes.

They certainly are

 

[respeito]

Wait a minute... ladybugs?

yes, ladybugs.. there is a reason that i said that to her. *smiles*

 

[respeito]

dear obscure person,

i know.

it's funny how things that we try so hard to prevent others from finding out have a way of bringing themselves to light.

truth is a cruel mistress that way....

*flutters fingers as i return to my usual place*

 

[highlandlassie224]

Dear Wife,

I love you, I really do. And I love that you are baking something special for me.

But...I would also really like it if you thought the fact that I find you as sexy and desirable as I did 25 years ago wasn't something you rolled your eyes at.

I know, I'm not really that sexy. I'm sorry. But...well...whatever.

Signed

Still here, still wanting you...

I'm sorry your wife apparently doesn't appreciate you. ::hugs:: You should never have to apologize to the person you love for who you are or how you look. Period. She may be rolling her eyes at your expressions of desire now, but I'm sure if she found herself alone, she'd miss having a lovely man tell her how sexy she is. Some women are just so stupid.

Dear TF

I am sorry that I wasn't able to hold your interest or be the woman you wanted. But even more so, I am sorry that you felt the need to lead me on, tell me what you thought I wanted to hear and then simply disappear. A 'good bye' from you would have hurt, but I could have respected that.

Instead, the wondering and not knowing what exactly I did so wrong, that you found so unworthy - that will eat away at me for a very long time.

K

I've been there, girl, and I'm sorry you're going through this. You're not the unworthy one, HE is. Remember that. If he can't realize what a fantastic woman he has right in front of him, screw him! He doesn't deserve you and he's freed you up to seek out a guy who does!! I know it doesn't feel like it now, but TF did you a favor. He saved you from his douchedom. (Maybe it's not a real word, but I like it anyway.) Chin up and if you want me to bust his kneecaps, send me a discreet PM with his possible locations for the next 3 days. I'm Sicilian....it's what we do. lol

Dear X,

I am done picking up after your ass, I'm done fixing the things you fuck up, I'm done keeping my mouth shut and I'm done letting you think that it's cute when you flounder around.

From now on I'm in charge and you will just have to deal. No more letting you control your area, I'm taking over. I don't think that you will be keeping your job either. I can't count on you for a single thing and I'm way too busy to have to patch it all together.

Either pick up the slack or you're gone.

Sincerely,
The Bitch In Charge

Wow. I'm borrowing this if that's cool with you. Modifying slightly, but I think it'll make for fine reading when the Ass gets home in the morning. Beautifully done!

 

[ch3rub]

Dear X-Wife,

Its been a year since we parted, its been a year since we are better off not being together, but i hate to admit, I missed you! Hate to admit, I still think of you...everyday. Hate to admit, my loins are still longing for you...

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear God,

Do you exist? If so why is it you are never there for me when I need you most? I cry out your name every time yet I get no response from you. Am I asking wrongly? I feel I am sincere when I ask. Sure some may call it begging, but isn't dropping to your knees to ask someone for something pretty much begging?

So when I was just 1 number away from winning $500 on that scratch off the other day, I was very sincere when I said oh God can you make that last number a match so I can win the $500. I felt my purity corsing through my veins as I begged you over and over for it to match. Did it? Of course it didn't and that is why I screamed out your name in anger.

Was it the coin I was using? It does say in God was trust on it. How could it be the wrong coin? It couldn't be. Hmmmm was it the way I was asking? When my wife screams out "Oh God" "Oh God" over and over you answer her by arching her back and letting her cum. Do I need to be jerking off while scratching off the lottery ticket? If that is the case I will need some tape to hold it down.

So do I have to synchronize the orgasm with the scratching of the ticket? That is going to take some effort as it takes me forever to find the perfect porn to jerk off to. Oh wait! Can I watch porn while scratching a lottery ticket and screaming your name or do I have to be fucking my wife instead? If that is the case I will have to tape the ticket to her forehead and do my best not to scratch her eyes out while we are both screaming your name as the last ticket is being scratched.

Now that I am starting to figure you out. I can understand why there has been so much conflict surrounding you. There are mixed signals being sent. Be pure but drop to your knees and beg. Allow women to orgasm yet don't let me win the lottery. It is kind of sexist to be honest. Why do women get to orgasm yet I don't get to win the lottery? I think I am a good person. I think I have a good heart.


Maybe I just need to scream it louder and thrash my head from side to side before you hear me.

Thank you for listening, I think.

 

[jeff_is_smiling]

Dear God,

Do you exist? If so why is it you are never there for me when I need you most? I cry out your name every time yet I get no response from you. Am I asking wrongly? I feel I am sincere when I ask. Sure some may call it begging, but isn't dropping to your knees to ask someone for something pretty much begging?

So when I was just 1 number away from winning $500 on that scratch off the other day, I was very sincere when I said oh God can you make that last number a match so I can win the $500. I felt my purity corsing through my veins as I begged you over and over for it to match. Did it? Of course it didn't and that is why I screamed out your name in anger.

Was it the coin I was using? It does say in God was trust on it. How could it be the wrong coin? It couldn't be. Hmmmm was it the way I was asking? When my wife screams out "Oh God" "Oh God" over and over you answer her by arching her back and letting her cum. Do I need to be jerking off while scratching off the lottery ticket? If that is the case I will need some tape to hold it down.

So do I have to synchronize the orgasm with the scratching of the ticket? That is going to take some effort as it takes me forever to find the perfect porn to jerk off to. Oh wait! Can I watch porn while scratching a lottery ticket and screaming your name or do I have to be fucking my wife instead? If that is the case I will have to tape the ticket to her forehead and do my best not to scratch her eyes out while we are both screaming your name as the last ticket is being scratched.

Now that I am starting to figure you out. I can understand why there has been so much conflict surrounding you. There are mixed signals being sent. Be pure but drop to your knees and beg. Allow women to orgasm yet don't let me win the lottery. It is kind of sexist to be honest. Why do women get to orgasm yet I don't get to win the lottery? I think I am a good person. I think I have a good heart.


Maybe I just need to scream it louder and thrash my head from side to side before you hear me.

Thank you for listening, I think.

Not to be a "but-in-ski" with your conversation with God, but I think you have the timing wrong. You are focusing too much on fucking when getting the lottery tickets...perhaps it should occur as the numbers are being drawn instead? Your wife's, "Oh God...oh God" comments might make the difference as the tumbler spins, you know?

Just a thought....

 

[IhateClowns]

Not to be a "but-in-ski" with your conversation with God, but I think you have the timing wrong. You are focusing too much on fucking when getting the lottery tickets...perhaps it should occur as the numbers are being drawn instead? Your wife's, "Oh God...oh God" comments might make the difference as the tumbler spins, you know?

Just a thought....

Hmmmm good point. Since women can have multiples maybe she screams out during the first 5 picks and icum when the powerball is drawn? I have been practicing my oh God in the mirror and I think I have it down. I assume that I have to be fucking her doggie style since we have to be on our knees when begging I mean praying.

Will let you know how it goes.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

Hmmmm good point. Since women can have multiples maybe she screams out during the first 5 picks and icum when the powerball is drawn? I have been practicing my oh God in the mirror and I think I have it down. I assume that I have to be fucking her doggie style since we have to be on our knees when begging I mean praying.

Will let you know how it goes.

I want pictures of this.

 

[respeito]

dear precipitation,

thank you for gracing us with your presence. we so desperately need you and i've always loved your sweet, earthy scent, and the delicate breeze you leave behind.

please feel free to stay a little while longer, i'm sure you won't wear out your welcome with mother earth.

sincerely,

the one born under water

 

[IhateClowns]

I want pictures of this.

Of what? The scratch off taped to her forehead as we have sex and I am gauging her eyes out with my lucky quarter or her on all four with me behind her clenching my lottery ticket praying I don't cum too early?