Dear X

[Spicy Southern Belle]

Dear man who stole the innocence of a child.
Calling you a man is being far too generous but I can't think of a word to describe what you are. I hate you. I hate that your actions have dictated so much of my life. I hate that, because of you, I get nauseous when my husband touches me certain ways and I can't even figure out why. I hate that you have once again become a focus of my mind and cause such pain and disruption.
Here is your warning though. This won't go on much longer. I will beat you! It may be the hardest thing I have ever done but one day you will not haunt me. You will not own any part of me. When I think of you it will be with nothing but the disdain that you have so earned. I won't even care enough about you to hate you anymore. I am looking forward to that day with great anticipation.

Signed,
The incredibly fed up SSB.

 

[sereneone4u]

Dear man who stole the innocence of a child.
Calling you a man is being far too generous but I can't think of a word to describe what you are. I hate you. I hate that your actions have dictated so much of my life. I hate that, because of you, I get nauseous when my husband touches me certain ways and I can't even figure out why. I hate that you have once again become a focus of my mind and cause such pain and disruption.
Here is your warning though. This won't go on much longer. I will beat you! It may be the hardest thing I have ever done but one day you will not haunt me. You will not own any part of me. When I think of you it will be with nothing but the disdain that you have so earned. I won't even care enough about you to hate you anymore. I am looking forward to that day with great anticipation.

Signed,
The incredibly fed up SSB.

You...are my motherfucking hero!

you GO girl!

 

[PeteHulbert37]

Dear Nearly Killed Me When You Lost Your Grip,

I am glad that the good folks down there fixed you up and got you ship, shape good as new. However, don't you ever be doing that again. You gave us both a scare, not to mention the poor young lady in her nice SUV. From the point forward you will always maintain your grip of the road even when it is wet, snowy or slushy out. No excuses. Got it! Good. Now, let's kick up some tunes and enjoy zooming about town again.

Signed,

Really Glad To Have My Own Wheels Back

 

[kendra1980]

Dear Twit,

You crack me the heck up. Keep up the good work. You are, after all, a pro.




Dear guy in the Explorer in front of me on the way to work yesterday,

bwahahahahahahaha, I don't think I've ever laughed so hard while driving. If your intent was humor. KUDOS.

If it was to try to intimidate me with your mouthing "FORTY FIVE" and pointing over the top of your car to the 45 mph speed limit sign, it was an abysmal FAIL.

Actually, it only made me inch a few inches closer to your bumper.

~Here's hoping you get in front of me again...I need a good giggle on the way to work.

 

[Sensualdreamer]

Dear coworker that keeps my candy jar completely depleted....

You're right...I don't eat it much, but it is there for EVERYONE...not for you to strap the feedbag on and have at it.

Would it hurt you to buy me a bag since you seem to go through 3 bags a week? No...so you are a pig, thoughtless, and cheap.

Ugh.

No wonder you are in the shape you are in.

I'm reminded of the story where an older lady bought some peanut m&m's and sucked the chocolate coating off the m&m's and put the peanuts in the candy dish...

Somehow I doubt you're that type but it would be funny

Dear man who stole the innocence of a child.
Calling you a man is being far too generous but I can't think of a word to describe what you are. I hate you. I hate that your actions have dictated so much of my life. I hate that, because of you, I get nauseous when my husband touches me certain ways and I can't even figure out why. I hate that you have once again become a focus of my mind and cause such pain and disruption.
Here is your warning though. This won't go on much longer. I will beat you! It may be the hardest thing I have ever done but one day you will not haunt me. You will not own any part of me. When I think of you it will be with nothing but the disdain that you have so earned. I won't even care enough about you to hate you anymore. I am looking forward to that day with great anticipation.

Signed,
The incredibly fed up SSB.

(((Hugs)))

I'm sorry he's still alive People that harm children should be given a "come to Jesus" meeting Just remember people that act like the devil will eventually be buried that much closer to him

 

[kendra1980]

I'm reminded of the story where an older lady bought some peanut m&m's and sucked the chocolate coating off the m&m's and put the peanuts in the candy dish...

Somehow I doubt you're that type but it would be funny





(((Hugs)))

I'm sorry he's still alive People that harm children should be given a "come to Jesus" meeting Just remember people that act like the devil will eventually be buried that much closer to him

I had to hide it SD. I put a little out each day in a candy dish. Students love it. He found the drawer I keep it in and cleaned out 4 bags of candy in 4 days. I kid you not. Then he got to where he'd send other coworkers to get it for him. Finally I moved it to a locked drawer. This man if 45. WTH????


Dear Beware,

All's fair in love and war. What goes around, comes around. And you have just put yourself in a very bad position for both of those little ditties.

Like a Hawk.




Dear Used to Be,

I'm a little confused and am wondering if your shrink hasn't told you that confession is good for the soul. What I find interesting is how those told took the news.

I'll never understand people...I do love trying to though

 

[sunshinegirl05]

Dear UPS guy,

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE bring all of my boxes with you tomorrow.

If you don't you will see a grown woman cry..........and I hate to cry.

Signed a slightly worried........okay a lot worried..........Book Fair Coordinator.


P.S. If you are cute, don't think that will help............I'm immuned to cute. That is your warning.

 

[fungatorgurl101]

Dear Cell Phone Provider -

I understand that we have to play this game and dance this little dance so I will play and dance. BUT I pay pretty damn good money for 2 phones and an internet card. AND I am starting to get over the inconsistency of receiving my text messages. You keep sending me new phones which is fantastic and all but its the same model phone and its NOT FIXING the problem. But I am patient so send me a new one YAY! And I will put the new one to how I like it which will take forever! And when it doesn't work I will do it all over again!
BUT I did talk to a nice person today who said we if this doesn't work maybe we will go unorthodox and get you a new model phone.... let's see what they offer then

Sincerely,
Playing your game and seeing what happens Litster

 

[BBW Fan]

Dear Moon,
If I have not told you lately, you are beautiful. I love to just look into your light. It is sensual. It is comforting. It is majestic. It is magical. It is wonderful. There is no wonder why you have so many admirers. Some even border on worship. You could say that I worship you.
I don't know where I'd be without you. My nights would be so dark that I could not see my way. And even during the times when I cannot see you, or you are so far away, I know that you are there.
Thank you for being my Moon, now and always.

 

[respeito]

*slides into a pew while holding my Bible*

Dear Lord,

You have given us a beautiful day today. I'm sorry that I've tainted it with thoughts of "unnamed". Instead of delighting in the warmth of the sun and gentle breeze, all I could think of was how nice it would be to have lunch on the lake with him. I should be thankful that for another day, I was able to rise from my bed and be a productive member of society, not dwelling on my daydreams. I realize that it may take some time, but I know that I will find peace of mind and I will be able to function throughout my day and not have my mind violated with thoughts of him. Even though I don't feel I deserve it at times, I am more than appreciative of your patience.

I ask that those who need it are given strength, health, and wisdom so that they may enjoy Mother Earth and the gifts you've blessed us with. Help us all to have a positive energy around us, embracing us always and forever.

In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti.

Amen.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Dear Spouse

Time and time I've asked you to take care of it, and time and time again the responsibility is thrust back at me because you "don't have the time". So if you are not satisfied with the decisions I make than take over and keep control of the situation, don't ho hum and tell me how it should have been done, or how it should be done - you weren't there, I was. I had to make the decision again and I'm tired of feeling like I'm the failure if things don't turn out right. I work with what I'm given and I can't continue to allow things to continue the way they have, so we're doing this my way and you'll either accept it, or you'll man up and do your part.

Signed,

You're very exhausted wife who wonders what life will be like with you after the last child leaves the nest.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Dear Niece's new boyfriend,

Our puppy Milo, who is a few months from being a year old, has NEVER growled at anyone since the day we picked him up and brought him home. Your new boyfriend however caused his whole demeanor to change into something that surprised your Uncle - Dogs sense bad things and they sense good things - you may want to reconsider that fella you're allowing to rule over you.

Love,

Your Aunt

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear hopefully getting that new job if you havent already,

I have lost my phone. Luckily the cock pics have been erased. Which means I have lost all my contacts as well. After much bitching moaning and whining I got Sprint to send me a new one free o charge. So now that I have it I need you to text me so I have your number again.

Thanks you

 

[Wings27]

DUUUUUUUUDE,

I've been going through withdrawls!

Signed,
Relieved that I saved the dick pics a long time ago

 

[Sensualdreamer]

Dear E***

OMG you drive me nuts!!! Yeah I get it you're a cute 19 year old Marine who for whatever reason has an infatuation w/ women who are older, and you seem to like me. Let me just kindly say that while you may be enamoured w/ women who are older, women who are older know what we want. The last thing that we want is a guy who doesn't have a clue what he wants Yeah I enjoy when you talk w/ me and text me...but really you need to either man up and know what you want, or keep taking your Flintstone's vitamins

Audio matches my script Me...

 

[littlelovedove]

Dear Headache,

Go away please. I've taken the meds, sure wish they would kick in soon. You are making it very difficult to see out of my left eye and the pain in my head is killing me!

Your's truly,
Headache sufferer.

 

[Spicy Southern Belle]

Dear Headache,

Go away please. I've taken the meds, sure wish they would kick in soon. You are making it very difficult to see out of my left eye and the pain in my head is killing me!

Your's truly,
Headache sufferer.

Dear Headache,
Please leave the sweet dovey one alone. You can come bother me if you need someone to bug, just let her be.

Sincerely,
The spicy one.

 

[sunshinegirl05]

Dear Person who is supposed to be my friend,

I guess you will be one less person I talk to outside of the general stuff.


Signed,

someone who is realizing more and more people can not be trust.

 

[o_so_wet]

Dear would be boss:

I don't get it. You interview me and say everything looks great. You ask me to prepare a 4 course meal for 8 persons as a part of my follow up interview. From scratch, in 3 hours, I produce and execute a menu that you and your guests say rival the best restaurants on the beach. You tell me out of a 10 everything was a 15. Your assistant tells me the job is mine "100%". That was on Tuesday. Today is Saturday and I still haven't gotten any response from you - not even to my email. Either something drastic has happened to you or you're just rude. I'm leaning to rude.

Trying not to have a rejection complex,

OSW

 

[Aquagal]

Dear Party Guest,

You need to take the massive hints that were being sent out that it was now time to go home. If you didn't get that you were the last guest here for a reason, maybe you would realize that now you were also the only one still drinking. How about that the kitchen was spotless because I just couldn't sit and listen to you blather on, that I had to keep my hands busy? Or that the kids were in bed and yours was sitting there all alone? How about the hint that maybe I should either call you a cab or you could stay the night? I thought dumping half your drink down the drain and filling with water would also be helpful while you went to the bathroom. When I literally had to tell you I was going to lay down with my kid for a few minutes, because all he could hear was your drunken yammering, was a low point for me. This is the second time this has happened, there will not be a third. Know when it's time to go home.

Your Fed Up Friend

 

[flirtygirly]

Dear EX -- stop with your half caring comments. I don't care if u still love me or miss me. I absolutely do not have those feelings for you. Anything I feel for u now are negative thoughts. You make zero effort to help. Your random phone calls have turned you into a deadbeat donor. If u truly cared for her u would make an effort, but you're a lazy ass mo-fo with all sorts of medical and mental issues. I hope there is a day I no longer have to be in contact with u.

Signed, leave me the fuck alone and go jump off a bridge.


Dearest Sweety -- all I ask is that we give it a try. What we have is so amazing and I know u agree. Don't be scared, u won't be alone, I want to wake up with u every morning.

Signed, your babydoll


Dear weekend -- I feel like we don't get that much time together anymore. Can you get rid of Monday for me?

Signed, needing a day to myself (yawn)

 

[fungatorgurl101]

Dear Cell Phone Provider -

I understand that we have to play this game and dance this little dance so I will play and dance. BUT I pay pretty damn good money for 2 phones and an internet card. AND I am starting to get over the inconsistency of receiving my text messages. You keep sending me new phones which is fantastic and all but its the same model phone and its NOT FIXING the problem. But I am patient so send me a new one YAY! And I will put the new one to how I like it which will take forever! And when it doesn't work I will do it all over again!
BUT I did talk to a nice person today who said we if this doesn't work maybe we will go unorthodox and get you a new model phone.... let's see what they offer then

Sincerely,
Playing your game and seeing what happens Litster

Dear Cell phone provider -

OKAY so the replacement phone you sent me that was worse than the first one yeah that was annoying... the NEW phone you sent me to REPLACE THAT ONE with no Battery or Battery back that was just funny. I get it NOW you're just playing tricks on me to see how long I can take it. JOKES on you customer service reps... I do your job and I have all your names, operator ID's and plenty of notes and apparently NO life cause yes OH YES I Will be writing a very long pointed letter to the complaint department cause well I can. And it may not go anywhere but fuck I will feel better

Sincerely,
STILL PLAYING Litster

 

[Sensualdreamer]

Dear Cell phone provider -

OKAY so the replacement phone you sent me that was worse than the first one yeah that was annoying... the NEW phone you sent me to REPLACE THAT ONE with no Battery or Battery back that was just funny. I get it NOW you're just playing tricks on me to see how long I can take it. JOKES on you customer service reps... I do your job and I have all your names, operator ID's and plenty of notes and apparently NO life cause yes OH YES I Will be writing a very long pointed letter to the complaint department cause well I can. And it may not go anywhere but fuck I will feel better

Sincerely,
STILL PLAYING Litster

Dear Litster in Cell phone angst...

I think as a precursor, you should also contact the Better Business Bureau and register a complaint that's just me giving a suggestion tho

 

[cf23430]

Dear X

Good bye...you know who you are.

CF

 

[Aurantica]

Dear S:
You're in your thirties. Grow up and start acting like it. Its a pain in the ass to have to put up with your insecureness day in, day out. You should know how to do this shit. IN YOUR SLEEP.