How do I know if she is bi...????

[dizzylia]

How about asking her round to watch a dvd, get some wine in and make sure the dvd has a bit of girl on girl action, probably best not to be a porn film but have one in reserve , just in case.

That's a good one. I've tried that, myself.

You could also casually bring other women into conversations, such as... actresses/models/etc. you might find attractive, with the intention of finding out if the other woman agrees or has her own favorites. It might not mean she leans that way sexually, but it can open a few windows and unlock a door or two.

 

[DarkAurora]

I wonder if this cute guy at my work is bi but it may just be my wanting him that makes me think he is bi. He asked me once, "How did you know you were gay?" but it was kind of the way he asked me. I don't know. It was after a lot of people at my work found out, so that may be why he asked me. I know for sure though he likes girls, so maybe it's just wishful thinking? Unlike some of the other guys at my work who make a lot of jokes about me and another gay boy at my work, this guy actually has been nicer to me and talks to me more since he found out I was gay.

 

[dizzylia]

I wonder if this cute guy at my work is bi but it may just be my wanting him that makes me think he is bi. He asked me once, "How did you know you were gay?" but it was kind of the way he asked me. I don't know. It was after a lot of people at my work found out, so that may be why he asked me. I know for sure though he likes girls, so maybe it's just wishful thinking? Unlike some of the other guys at my work who make a lot of jokes about me and another gay boy at my work, this guy actually has been nicer to me and talks to me more since he found out I was gay.

I've found the more I dwell on such questions, the more they drive me crazy. If he's actually curious, he'll approach you again. In the meantime, don't worry about it.

 

[killallhippies]

I wonder if this cute guy at my work is bi but it may just be my wanting him that makes me think he is bi. He asked me once, "How did you know you were gay?" but it was kind of the way he asked me. I don't know. It was after a lot of people at my work found out, so that may be why he asked me. I know for sure though he likes girls, so maybe it's just wishful thinking? Unlike some of the other guys at my work who make a lot of jokes about me and another gay boy at my work, this guy actually has been nicer to me and talks to me more since he found out I was gay.

this is pretty much why i have to wonder if all the people telling this woman to just go for it are really thinking clearly. i've seen no evidence to suggest that it makes sense for her to just go all in right now, because unless i missed something her only clue is a short conversation about a dream that could mean nothing.

of course i'm not saying she should just let it go and not even try, but caution is in order. i once try to pursue something with a straight friend i thought was curious. it turned out that he may have been, but he had no interest in satisfying that curiousity at the time and our friendship fizzle out slowly from there.

eventually he turned into quite the prick, so i'm actually quite glad that nothing happened, but at the time i was really quite disappointed, but oh well...

anyway, i still think she should step lightly if she doesn't want to risk a friendship.

 

[I Literoticus]

I wonder if this cute guy at my work is bi but it may just be my wanting him that makes me think he is bi. He asked me once, "How did you know you were gay?" but it was kind of the way he asked me. I don't know. It was after a lot of people at my work found out, so that may be why he asked me. I know for sure though he likes girls, so maybe it's just wishful thinking? Unlike some of the other guys at my work who make a lot of jokes about me and another gay boy at my work, this guy actually has been nicer to me and talks to me more since he found out I was gay.

The bigger question would be whether its worth getting involved with work mates.

could be more hassle than its worth.

 

[CuriousNiceGuy]

I really think that the type of actions that guy does around DarkAurora could possibly mean something.So maybe you too could find actions like these that she does.
Don't know if you got me, as my syntax SUCKZ.

Anyway, Darkie how's it going with that work buddy?
Did you flirt with him at all?

 

[MWMBi]

this is pretty much why i have to wonder if all the people telling this woman to just go for it are really thinking clearly. i've seen no evidence to suggest that it makes sense for her to just go all in right now, because unless i missed something her only clue is a short conversation about a dream that could mean nothing.

of course i'm not saying she should just let it go and not even try, but caution is in order. i once try to pursue something with a straight friend i thought was curious. it turned out that he may have been, but he had no interest in satisfying that curiousity at the time and our friendship fizzle out slowly from there.

eventually he turned into quite the prick, so i'm actually quite glad that nothing happened, but at the time i was really quite disappointed, but oh well...

anyway, i still think she should step lightly if she doesn't want to risk a friendship.

Absolutely agree 100%.

 

[Etoile]

How about asking her round to watch a dvd, get some wine in and make sure the dvd has a bit of girl on girl action, probably best not to be a porn film but have one in reserve , just in case.

If you're going to go for this idea, Bound would be an excellent choice. Dykey, but not too dykey, with a good sex scene.

 

[dizzylia]

If you're going to go for this idea, Bound would be an excellent choice. Dykey, but not too dykey, with a good sex scene.

Totally. Awesome movie. I like Gia for that as well. Angelina Jolie and Elizabeth Mitchell. Or there's Kissing Jessica Stein, which I once watched on accident because I was told it was a good "date movie". Imagine my date's surprise. And mine! rawr.

 

[CuriousNiceGuy]

Ok...For some reason I remember STRONGLY the last two posts(by etoile and dyzilia) being posted in the past too...
It is probably a dejavu, but omg it's so realistic...

Anyway, I have nothing useful to say, I was just totally taken by surprise..
..it IS the first time you posted those isn't it?...

Am I going nuts? I need sex

 

[dizzylia]

Ok...For some reason I remember STRONGLY the last two posts(by etoile and dyzilia) being posted in the past too...
It is probably a dejavu, but omg it's so realistic...

Anyway, I have nothing useful to say, I was just totally taken by surprise..
..it IS the first time you posted those isn't it?...

Am I going nuts? I need sex

*grins* Yes, that's the first time I posted that. I'm fairly certain. Maybe you read the thread already, really liked it, then read it again...

 

[Etoile]

Beats me!

 

[Lady_Prowless]

good question..if i knew that i would have cheated long time ago.lol

 

[neonflux]

another with bad gaydar...

if only flirting worked... have someone with whom I work occasionally (on collaborative projects, not in my office or organization) and with whom i've flirted often (she is quite fetching). not that this is an indication of ANYthing but recently found out she was married... sigh!

would second what everyone else here is suggesting - find some way to talk about it. of couse, here in the Bay Area, I think no one would have a problem with that but I imagine it could be awkward in some parts of the country. i did like the suggestion to check out reading material (and perhaps show some of your own) as an entre

I've only met females in Gay Bars or Clubs.......

If I was interested in someone and didn't know her sexual orientation...I guess I would flirt with her a bit.....and see if I could pick up any vibes....

 

[blondi84]

That's a good one. I've tried that, myself.

You could also casually bring other women into conversations, such as... actresses/models/etc. you might find attractive, with the intention of finding out if the other woman agrees or has her own favorites. It might not mean she leans that way sexually, but it can open a few windows and unlock a door or two.

Any suggestions for movies? Monster comes to mind, but for some reason that is just not the sexy image I would be going for...

 

[killallhippies]

d.e.b.s. would be nice and subtle and some people actually seem to think it's funny. i don't, but some people do. it has its moments, but that's about it.

 

[playwithlezli]

Lost in Rainbow Land

For all the good it has done me, I throw double entendres into the conversation, such as "well, I AM a Vancouver girl after all" or "I like everyone" or even "my favourite colour is rainbow" but alas, most remain clueless.

And when I have a friend go all touchy feely on me, she backs off when I respond. Seems like there are a lot of bi-curious ladies who aren't ready for the plunge.

Maybe me being middle aged with a live in boyfriend 12 years younger and having 3 almost grown kids has something to do with folks being confused about my sexual identity!

Good luck with the fact finding mission. And enjoy the fantasy fodder in the meantime!

 

[Etoile]

Any suggestions for movies? Monster comes to mind, but for some reason that is just not the sexy image I would be going for...

Oh hell no. Not Monster. Totally not the right type.

Now, High Art, with Ally Sheedy...I think that would be a good one!

 

[Lady_Prowless]

Oh hell no. Not Monster. Totally not the right type.

Now, High Art, with Ally Sheedy...I think that would be a good one!

hahaha classic comes to mind....Poison Ivy....ummmmmmmmm

 

[dizzylia]

Any suggestions for movies? Monster comes to mind, but for some reason that is just not the sexy image I would be going for...

Movies? Angelina Jolie anything. Or maybe that's just me. She's made some good ones for that, though. Gia and Foxfire come to mind.

There's also Better than Chocolate, which I haven't seen yet, alas, but I've heard it's excellent. There are some really good ones out there. Try Googling something like 'lesbian date movie'.

 

[revolution724]

There's always Mulholland Drive.

Y'know, I may get kicked out of the club for saying this, but Angelina Jolie doesn't do a thing for me. Huh.

 

[Etoile]

Angelina doesn't do a lot for me physically, but the bad girl persona is fun.

 

[dizzylia]

That just leaves more for me.

 

[blondi84]

"i haven't had a date in almost three months since I broke up with my girlfriend,"

Another good subtle line to drop in a conversation to see how a woman replies. I appreciate your help M-Y Erotica. It is informative. Also agree with the no seducing....only offering comment you made. I feel as though women who have no experience in bisexuality might be inclined to think they are being seduced. While they may have interest in the seducing woman and in exploring her bisxuality, she likely does not want it to be seductive. So playing it out casual may allow an interested virgin bisexual to feel comfortable. Rambling on.......I know!

I am curious, but don't have the balls to activley flirt with another girl. (Yes I know that I am a girl, and I shouldn't have balls anyway!) If one of my bi or lesbian friends were to come up, and just rub my shoulders or something, I would be so appreciative! I know that I have friends that are into girls, but am afraid to do anything about it because I am unsure if they are attracted to me! A shoulder rub, could be suggestive enough for me to feel comfortable responding in a sexual way, like reaching up and holding her hand, but could also be platonic.

 

[LotusFlower24]

I don't have a problem flirting with girls, I love to flirt with everyone. My problem is more judging if they are open or not to going past that stage. Part of my hesitency is that I'm not sure I wanted to risk a friendship on a miss understanding/reading of signals.