Laughter is Contagious
- Thread starter techsan
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done_got_old
Literotica Guru
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I thought this photo of a Bride and Groom releasing a dove at their wedding was especially touching.
http://www.literacyrules.com/lit/dove.jpg
http://www.literacyrules.com/lit/dove.jpg
MsBug
curiously astray
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Delicacy
An Arizona cowboy stopped at a local restaurant following a day of
drinking and roaming around in Mexico. While sipping his tequila, he
noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the
next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful.
He asked the waiter, "What is that you just served?"
The waiter replied, "Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are
bull's testicles from the bullfight this morning. A delicacy!"
The cowboy, though momentarily daunted, said, "What the heck, I'm
on vacation down here! Bring me an order!"
The waiter said, "I am sorry senor. There is only one serving per
day, because there is only one bullfight each morning. If you come
early tomorrow and place your order, we will be sure to save you
this delicacy!"
The next morning, the cowboy returned, placed his order, and
then that evening he was served the one and only special delicacy
of the day.
After a few bites, and inspecting the contents of his platter, he
called to the waiter and said, "These are delicious, but they are
much, much smaller Than the ones I saw you serve yesterday!"
The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Si, Senor.
Sometimes the bull wins."
An Arizona cowboy stopped at a local restaurant following a day of
drinking and roaming around in Mexico. While sipping his tequila, he
noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the
next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful.
He asked the waiter, "What is that you just served?"
The waiter replied, "Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are
bull's testicles from the bullfight this morning. A delicacy!"
The cowboy, though momentarily daunted, said, "What the heck, I'm
on vacation down here! Bring me an order!"
The waiter said, "I am sorry senor. There is only one serving per
day, because there is only one bullfight each morning. If you come
early tomorrow and place your order, we will be sure to save you
this delicacy!"
The next morning, the cowboy returned, placed his order, and
then that evening he was served the one and only special delicacy
of the day.
After a few bites, and inspecting the contents of his platter, he
called to the waiter and said, "These are delicious, but they are
much, much smaller Than the ones I saw you serve yesterday!"
The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Si, Senor.
Sometimes the bull wins."
techsan
...just chugging along
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- 6,165
Two Brothers
Once upon a time there were two brothers. One brother was always getting into trouble. The other brother was very good. He was always kind to animals, helped elderly neighbors, and led an exemplary life. As time went on, the brothers stayed in touch but were never very close. The evil brother became a heavy drinker and a womanizer. The good brother was a devoted husband and father and supported many charities. Finally, the evil brother died. Then, after a few years passed, the good brother passed away.
The good brother went to heaven and was rewarded with a happy afterlife. One day the good brother went to God and asked, "Where is my brother? He died before me, but I haven't seen him here in heaven."
God replied, "As you know, your brother led an evil life, so he is not spending eternity here in heaven. He has been sent elsewhere."
"I'm sorry to hear that," the good brother replied. "But I do miss him and wish I could see him again."
"You can see him if you wish," God said. "I will give you the power to gaze into hell."
So the power was granted and the good brother gazed into hell. Before long he saw his brother sitting on a bench. In one arm he held a keg of beer, and in the other he cradled a gorgeous young blonde.
The good brother turned to God and said, "I can't believe what I'm seeing. I have found my brother, and he has a keg of beer in one arm and a beautiful woman in the other. Surely, hell can't be that bad."
God explained. "Things aren't always as they seem. The keg has a hole in it. The blonde doesn't."
Once upon a time there were two brothers. One brother was always getting into trouble. The other brother was very good. He was always kind to animals, helped elderly neighbors, and led an exemplary life. As time went on, the brothers stayed in touch but were never very close. The evil brother became a heavy drinker and a womanizer. The good brother was a devoted husband and father and supported many charities. Finally, the evil brother died. Then, after a few years passed, the good brother passed away.
The good brother went to heaven and was rewarded with a happy afterlife. One day the good brother went to God and asked, "Where is my brother? He died before me, but I haven't seen him here in heaven."
God replied, "As you know, your brother led an evil life, so he is not spending eternity here in heaven. He has been sent elsewhere."
"I'm sorry to hear that," the good brother replied. "But I do miss him and wish I could see him again."
"You can see him if you wish," God said. "I will give you the power to gaze into hell."
So the power was granted and the good brother gazed into hell. Before long he saw his brother sitting on a bench. In one arm he held a keg of beer, and in the other he cradled a gorgeous young blonde.
The good brother turned to God and said, "I can't believe what I'm seeing. I have found my brother, and he has a keg of beer in one arm and a beautiful woman in the other. Surely, hell can't be that bad."
God explained. "Things aren't always as they seem. The keg has a hole in it. The blonde doesn't."
Last edited:
Sloppykitten
Literotica Guru
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techsan said:
LOL I did, Darlin', I did...I just wanted to give you a "hard" time
pleaz_me
Icing Queen
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- Dec 2, 2005
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- 47,698
ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!MsBug said:An Arizona cowboy stopped at a local restaurant following a day of
drinking and roaming around in Mexico. While sipping his tequila, he
noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the
next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Si, Senor.
Sometimes the bull wins."
pleaz_me
Icing Queen
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- Dec 2, 2005
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master_dom
Experienced
- Joined
- Jan 1, 1970
- Posts
- 73
Which one do you want?
wally2450
Inquisitive
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- Dec 12, 2005
- Posts
- 12,353
Blonde parents
Morris and Becky were delighted when finally
their long wait to adopt a baby came to an end.
The adoption center called and told them they
had a wonderful Russian baby boy and the couple
took him without hesitation.
On the way home from the adoption center, they
stopped by the local college so they each could
enroll in night courses.
After they filled out the form, the registration
clerk inquired, "What ever possessed you to study
Russian?"
The couple said proudly, "We just adopted a
Russian baby and in a year or so he'll start
to talk. We just want to be able to understand
him."
Morris and Becky were delighted when finally
their long wait to adopt a baby came to an end.
The adoption center called and told them they
had a wonderful Russian baby boy and the couple
took him without hesitation.
On the way home from the adoption center, they
stopped by the local college so they each could
enroll in night courses.
After they filled out the form, the registration
clerk inquired, "What ever possessed you to study
Russian?"
The couple said proudly, "We just adopted a
Russian baby and in a year or so he'll start
to talk. We just want to be able to understand
him."
kayte
This Was My Favorite Toy
- Joined
- Jan 7, 2002
- Posts
- 135,693
wally2450 said:
Oh my! Are they both blonde? http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/DannyJane/Smilies/Emotions%20Multi/LaughterFunny/4.gif
Two ninety year old men, Moe and Sam, have been friends all their lives.
Sam is dying, and Moe comes to visit him every day.
"Sam," says Moe, "We have both loved baseball all our lives, and
played minor league ball together for so many years. You have to do
me one favor.
When you get to Heaven, somehow you've got to let me know if there's
baseball in Heaven."
Sam looks up at Moe from his death bed, and says, "Moe, if it is at
all possible, I'll do it for you."
Shortly after that, Sam passes on. At midnight a couple of nights
later, Moe is awakened by a blinding flash of white light and a voice
calling "Moe....Moe...."
"Who is it?" says Moe sitting up suddenly. "Who is it?"
"Moe, it's me, Sam."
"Come on. You're not Sam. Sam just died."
"I'm telling you," insists the voice. "It's me, Sam!"
"Sam? Where are you?"
"I'm in heaven," says Sam, "and I've got really good news and a little bad news."
"So, tell me the good news first," says Moe.
"The good news," says Sam "is that there is baseball in heaven.
Better yet, all our old buddies who've gone before us are there, and
we're all young men again. It's always spring time and it never rains or snows.
And best of all, we can play baseball all we want, and we never get
tired!"
"Really?" says Moe, "That is fantastic, wonderful beyond my wildest
dreams!
But, what's the bad news?"
"You're pitching next Tuesday!"
Sam is dying, and Moe comes to visit him every day.
"Sam," says Moe, "We have both loved baseball all our lives, and
played minor league ball together for so many years. You have to do
me one favor.
When you get to Heaven, somehow you've got to let me know if there's
baseball in Heaven."
Sam looks up at Moe from his death bed, and says, "Moe, if it is at
all possible, I'll do it for you."
Shortly after that, Sam passes on. At midnight a couple of nights
later, Moe is awakened by a blinding flash of white light and a voice
calling "Moe....Moe...."
"Who is it?" says Moe sitting up suddenly. "Who is it?"
"Moe, it's me, Sam."
"Come on. You're not Sam. Sam just died."
"I'm telling you," insists the voice. "It's me, Sam!"
"Sam? Where are you?"
"I'm in heaven," says Sam, "and I've got really good news and a little bad news."
"So, tell me the good news first," says Moe.
"The good news," says Sam "is that there is baseball in heaven.
Better yet, all our old buddies who've gone before us are there, and
we're all young men again. It's always spring time and it never rains or snows.
And best of all, we can play baseball all we want, and we never get
tired!"
"Really?" says Moe, "That is fantastic, wonderful beyond my wildest
dreams!
But, what's the bad news?"
"You're pitching next Tuesday!"
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