Let's talk about sex baby...

[tnman03]

#79. How open are you about your sexuality in real life compared to what you share on Lit?

I'll discuss sex if its the conversation topic but and pretty private on my own experiences and preferences.

Not 100% I'm a fairly private person in RL, but they know snippets, but not all my proclivities

And as usual the intrigue... Good for you!!

 

[lexieredefined]

#79. How open are you about your sexuality in real life compared to what you share on Lit?

Depends on who it is. Some people I censor myself around because I know they don't see sex and sexuality the same way I do. It's just best to agree to disagree and not cause any awkward situations. Other people I'll talk all day about it with. It's kinda the same on Lit.

 

[Lunation]

#79. How open are you about your sexuality in real life compared to what you share on Lit?

It's not something I initiate conversation about, but I'll discuss it.

As with any intimate topic I am completely open. But not open in a way that gets people closer to me, more like an open window, so people can see right through me without noticing the substance.

Plus, public conversations including any type of innuendo with a vulgar edge makes me highly uncomfortable.

 

[suckonsimon]

#79
I didn't know how to be open about my sexuality, to any significant extent, until I happened on Literotica. My wife used to long for me to open up more about where I was at with our sex life! I could walk the walk but I was all shut in as to talking the talk. So it's only in the last few years that our conversations about sex, both the deep ones and the arousing ones, have been freed up! Thank you Lit!

Never had a difficulty talking sex as a parent with my young ones. I think that was because I knew that the core reason for my own reticence was the total mess of my parents' marriage and therefore the total block on any discussion about sex at home through my formative years. I was not gonna pass on that handicap to my kids.

I love dropping in the occasional bombshell of sexual explicitness when socialising with friends these days! The shock for some of them is double because I never used to! Again, thank you Lit!

I'm reminded:

Lot of years ago, bunch of us in the pub having a great chin wag. Guy not much into music who knew I adore Paul Simon. He says, "Hey Simon I heard that song, 'Cecilia' yesterday. Bit explicit for main stream isn't it?" I say to him, "Ah, but there's an important moral in it." Look of puzzlement. "Don't get up and wash your face."

... Well, it was a lot of years ago ...

 

[Kat73]

#79. How open are you about your sexuality in real life compared to what you share on Lit?

I am generally the TMI friend... my close friends know most everything. I allude to more with others and anyone else just thinks I'm the funny pervy one...

 

[Trekka]

#79. How open are you about your sexuality in real life compared to what you share on Lit?

With my BF? Completely open.

With my closest friends? They know I'm kinky. I don't get too detailed unless they ask. I have one best GF that knows pretty much everything though.

The older I get the more I *just don't care* and I've realized that as I've become more open, friends come to me with sexual confessions, issues, quandaries... which is nice! I dig being the Dan Savage of my peer group.

But am I marching in a parade at the end of a leash? Not... yet.

 

[IhateClowns]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

 

[ForestFlame]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

birthday suit, I hate being constricted when trying to sleep.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

Undies and a t-shirt.

 

[Suz_anne]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

During warm weather months, a camisole tank top or a t-shirt and undies.

During cold weather months, a cashmere sweater and undies. It's an indulgence, yes - but it keeps me out of flannel nightgowns.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

During warm weather months, a camisole tank top or a t-shirt and undies.

During cold weather months, a cashmere sweater and undies. It's an indulgence, yes - but it keeps me out of flannel nightgowns.

That made me smile...

 

[aussiegeekygal]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

Undies, sometimes a camisole.
In winter I upgrade to a T-shirt.

 

[lexieredefined]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

Usually nothing. If it gets really cold in the winter, I'll put on long sleeved shirt.

 

[newbiebabe]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

always a strappy nightie, summer or winter

 

[annabel_lee]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

Nothing when I'm home, no matter the season. At a hotel I'll have something nearby to put on in case of a fire or something (gotta be prepared!). If I'm staying with family/friends I'll wear a t-shirt and pj shorts or pants.

 

[just4friends]

pj's and t shirt

or

nada

 

[Lunation]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

Check out the time stamps on my posts. I don't sleep.




That's when they get you...

 

[ViciousTease]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

A tank top and panties

 

[Adder4321]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

In Summer, either underwear or nothing. In winter, enough clothing to give a camel heatstroke.

 

[lacandy]

#79. How open are you about your sexuality in real life compared to what you share on Lit?

I live in a VERY VERY conservative state...so even my writing is done under a penname so my kids' friends' parents don't shun us. Soooo not at all open in RL about my sexual wants and needs.

Husband has some issues about sex and how a "wife" should act so when I tried to talk about things was shut down pretty quickly.

That being said, I have an amazing BFF who knows me well and doesn't judge.

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

My biggest fear has always been my kids deciding to crawl in bed with us so I am always in something - pj bottoms and a tshirt usually.

 

[DennisB]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

Usually hubby's cum.

 

[Endless_Night]

#80. What do you typically wear when you go to bed?

Shortie stuff in summer. Short tee and either panties or girly boxers. Occasionally a baby doll or some other mid-thigh nighty.

Winter. Long sleeves and either panties or possibly pajama bottoms.

Note: *theft alert* So stealing Suz's cashmere sweater idea. Not so indulgent here as there will rarely be nights cold enough to put it to use.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

Husband has some issues about sex and how a "wife" should act so when I tried to talk about things was shut down pretty quickly.

I seriously do not understand this at all.
I mean what part of "Lady in the Streets, Slut between the sheets" don't these men get? (e.g. you're not the first person to say this).

That said, in a broader context, it's been observation that many people here fall into this type of category: significant difference in libido and/or kink level between them and spouse.

I've often wondered though, if two people with really really high kink/libedo level were to be married would they end up spending so much time having sex that they did nothing else and literally starved to death? Also, suppose you had two people who had no interest in sex at all, they would never have sex.

Maybe there is something else, somehow, that makes it so high libido match up with low libido so that on average they have the "right" amount of sex?

(Hmmmm...this sounds like a good research topic...IRB approval will be...fascinating! )

 

[Trekka]

I've often wondered though, if two people with really really high kink/libedo level were to be married would they end up spending so much time having sex that they did nothing else and literally starved to death?

Short answer? No

Medium answer: I'm about to run off and get dinner started. I'm off work today so I'll probably make something complex-ish. Meanwhile, he's on the job working his tail off. When he comes home? I'll feed him good and once the kiddos are in bed? Music on, bedroom door locked, clothes off.

Long answer: We tease each other all day long. Sexy texts and pics. Loving phone calls. He solicitously folds my laundry. I rub his neck and tell him I appreciate it. I carefully plan the weekly menu. He rubs my feet and tells me he appreciates it. Laundry and cooking can be sexy too. And we get our chores done, we are grown ups after all. Kids mortgage etc.

We're both divorced and came from sexless marriages and will not compromise on that slice of the Life Pie. So we make it a priority. I'm too tired and he's amorous? I get nekked! At minimum I will burn calories and he does the same for me. Rarely, one of us turns the other down and it's gotten to the point where he will hand me my vibe, say "babe I gotta sleep!" and send me on my merry way.

But no, we don't have so much sex that we get nothing done. If anything, we get more done because we spend zip time arguing about sex. And we've got lotsa good endorphin rich energy in the tank.

We are a pretty energetic couple in general ...we get shit done. We also had unequal division of labor in our previous marriages so that's another area we both tend to, carefully.

Maybe the moral of the story is that we both needed a mulligan. And so far so good. Here's to living and learning

 

[lakesailer_mi]

Short answer? No

Medium answer: I'm about to run off and get dinner started. I'm off work today so I'll probably make something complex-ish. Meanwhile, he's on the job working his tail off. When he comes home? I'll feed him good and once the kiddos are in bed? Music on, bedroom door locked, clothes off.

Long answer: We tease each other all day long. Sexy texts and pics. Loving phone calls. He solicitously folds my laundry. I rub his neck and tell him I appreciate it. I carefully plan the weekly menu. He rubs my feet and tells me he appreciates it. Laundry and cooking can be sexy too. And we get our chores done, we are grown ups after all. Kids mortgage etc.

We're both divorced and came from sexless marriages and will not compromise on that slice of the Life Pie. So we make it a priority. I'm too tired and he's amorous? I get nekked! At minimum I will burn calories and he does the same for me. Rarely, one of us turns the other down and it's gotten to the point where he will hand me my vibe, say "babe I gotta sleep!" and send me on my merry way.

But no, we don't have so much sex that we get nothing done. If anything, we get more done because we spend zip time arguing about sex. And we've got lotsa good endorphin rich energy in the tank.

We are a pretty energetic couple in general ...we get shit done. We also had unequal division of labor in our previous marriages so that's another area we both tend to, carefully.

Maybe the moral of the story is that we both needed a mulligan. And so far so good. Here's to living and learning

I have three responses to this...
(1) For God's sake don't tell this to NIH, I have the proposal half written already...
(2) I'm happy for you. Really....
(3) Well....fuck....sigh...so much for *that* "why I should just be content" argument...