Pmann's Advice by Pmann Thread- Ask Me Shit

[BlackCaramelCreme]

What other artists besides Mateus Asato would you recommend keeping an eye on?

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear slutty friend,

If your “friend’s” friend makes your friend’s panties wet, throw caution to the prudes and tell her to be a cock gobbling gutter whore. You only live once, might as well as fun. I mean your “friend” might as well as fun. You’re obviously a lady who just makes questionable choices in friends.

Timing differs for everyone. Maybe your “friend’s” friend is a well adjusted cock slinger who knows that a woman can be both a lady of the highest repute and a total slut for the right cock.

A

Apisto gives good advice. He and I collaborated on some work with my Titty Committee about a year ago. He did well.

Preach

I'll be happy to answer the many questions you'll inevitably need to ask.

If I may be so bold, I think Pmann's advice would be:

Dear cum-drunk whore,

To swallow, or not to swallow, that is the question, so the answer to that query is yes, swallow. Insofar as speed of swallowing is concerned, don't be hasty. Savor it. Roll it around your mouth to experience every nuance of that thick, rich treat.

I don't think I would've described cum in such a loving, affectionate way.

 

[Lord Pmann]

I go to pmann for everything.

Literally.

I do.

I do give the best advice. Now people can read it for their own eyes.

Oh dear.

You are a fan, no?

Wait. I can never tell who is truly a pmann fan or not? Is this sarcastic?!

She's a fan. A huge fan. And yes it was sarcastic. She's worried anyone would take advice from me.

Clearly, this thread has a theme, and is deserving of a...well; theme song.

Prove me wrong; this is it.

https://youtu.be/NraGiYOGHlk

No proving you wrong, mate. Nothing but whores.

Well to be honest when I think of Lord Pmann, I think of...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4dAy9u0_9nM

and I think that's him in the video...

 

[Lord Pmann]

I used to look forward to watermelon every summer, now I can’t look at one at all..

Damn pmann’s overzealous cock

You are welcome.

No.

Are you a fan?!?

Slutty friend fanning herself over the hotness that just arrived in her inbox.

This thread... Already helping people hook up.

My CUNTY friend thanks you for this solid advice.

Of course. My advice is the best.

 

[Lord Pmann]

What other artists besides Mateus Asato would you recommend keeping an eye on?

Oooh... Cool question. First non-slutty one too!

As far as pure talent, Manuel Gardner Fernandes is just insane with what he can play.

https://youtu.be/BoLxnOvT5FY

Tina S is a girl from France who does some amazing covers for her age. They are amazing anyway, but played as a 16 year old... damn. For The Love Of God is played spot on a d it's one of the most technically difficult pieces I've ever heard.

https://youtu.be/nJi8iSpzq9I

Doyle Dykes is probably one of the most fascinating acoustic players I've ever seen. I'd argue he is the best in the world. I once had to play somewhere and he opened, then I had to play, then he played after me. Fuck.

https://youtu.be/Fo3guPhG89E

Luca Stricagnoli is probably the most technically proficient acoustic player I've ever seen. He's amazing and his covers are so difficult and innovative. His cover of Last of the Mohicans is as beautiful as it would be difficult to play.

https://youtu.be/6Kbv1OpIpaA

His cover of Feel Good Inc by Gorillaz is class too.

https://youtu.be/Z6_HlOqy2C0

I also love Davie504, but he's a bass player who just makes some hilariously funny videos. I love watching him a d he's the only YouTuber musician I follow.

 

[Suz_anne]

Dear Great and Powerful Lord Pmann,

Fairly recently, I discovered that my husband has 1 lone white hair on his ballsack.

I like to refer to it as Burgess Meredith (because that guy was really old and funny in the movie Grumpy Old Men) and I don't want it to be plucked/shorn. My husband thinks that I'm being mean and should call it something more suave and debonair like George Clooney.

Who's right here?

Fondly,
Intelligent Musings Rarely Incorrect Gorgeous Hilarious Taunts

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Great and Powerful Lord Pmann,

Fairly recently, I discovered that my husband has 1 lone white hair on his ballsack.

I like to refer to it as Burgess Meredith (because that guy was really old and funny in the movie Grumpy Old Men) and I don't want it to be plucked/shorn. My husband thinks that I'm being mean and should call it something more suave and debonair like George Clooney.

Who's right here?

Fondly,
Intelligent Musings Rarely Incorrect Gorgeous Hilarious Taunts

Dear IMRIGHT,

I would rather any grey hair on my body be referred to as something regal. Something distinguished. Thus, my first grey hair was known as Gandalf.

So I'm going to side with your husband on this. Give him the dignity he deserves for his aging grey pubes. I mean, one day, you'll be old and wrinkly and you'll want that same treatment, right?

I'm totally kidding with all this. You should give his pubes the ridicule they deserve. I'd put them on Instagram.

 

[Lord Pmann]

I got my first anonymous question

Well, it's anonymous to you fuckers because you can't be trusted.

My boyfriend got me all worked up today, initiates playtime, then tells me he’s gotta go. Am I not interesting enough? Is there someone else? Should I take this as a sign of a downhill turn?

Sincerely,

Libido Escaped? Fuck That

Dear LEFT,

Damn. That's a shitty situation to have. I'm not quite sure if this boyfriend is in person or online. They're two vastly different scenarios. Let's go with the least likely and most drastic first.

Scenario 1: In Person

If this happened in person, I might recommend telling him to fuck right off. I mean, if he's feeling you up and you're getting all grabby and he just says he has to go, that's pretty shitty. Was his boner flaccid? Did he cum in his pants too early? These are all possibilities, but I think this isn't the right situation.

Scenario 2: Online

This is a different story. There are a lot of possibilities. I'll go with the most likely to the least likely.

- He got interrupted. Just that simple. Sometimes it happens. You're getting down and dirty, stroking or rubbing and then your stupid students start asking questions or your cell mates are making noise. Rude. This is really common. Online fun can be really hot. But a lot of pervs do this stuff at work or in inconvenient locations. Sometimes you have to drop your dick and move on.

- He was finished. He came and didn't want to help out.

- He has other girls on the side and he got a better offer.

- He has dick problems and he's embarrassed.

- You take too long.

- He's losing interest.

All those are possibilities. I'm going to suggest something pretty cutting edge and bizarre. Ready? Ask him. Have open communications about it. Talk with him. Don't be needy. But just be cool about it.

Report back with the findings and I'll let these listers know the outcome!

 

[Apisto42]

Advising communication and honesty?

 

[Apisto42]

Dearest pmann,

So I work with this chick who is way closer in age to my son than to me. She’s almost as tall as I am, huge tits, long haired brunette and a fucking stunning ass. She’s got the face of a horse though.

I find her personality to be grating and highly annoying with a laugh that echoes down the hallway and makes me want to bitch slap her till she shuts the fuck up.

And yet, I found myself today during a meeting wondering what she’d look like with my cock down her throat. Is this normal? What should I do about this?

Signed,

Desiring understanding dick emotions

 

[85Ironman]

Well, it's anonymous to you fuckers because you can't be trusted.

Dear LEFT,

Damn. That's a shitty situation to have. I'm not quite sure if this boyfriend is in person or online. They're two vastly different scenarios. Let's go with the least likely and most drastic first.

Scenario 1: In Person

If this happened in person, I might recommend telling him to fuck right off. I mean, if he's feeling you up and you're getting all grabby and he just says he has to go, that's pretty shitty. Was his boner flaccid? Did he cum in his pants too early? These are all possibilities, but I think this isn't the right situation.

Scenario 2: Online

This is a different story. There are a lot of possibilities. I'll go with the most likely to the least likely.

- He got interrupted. Just that simple. Sometimes it happens. You're getting down and dirty, stroking or rubbing and then your stupid students start asking questions or your cell mates are making noise. Rude. This is really common. Online fun can be really hot. But a lot of pervs do this stuff at work or in inconvenient locations. Sometimes you have to drop your dick and move on.

- He was finished. He came and didn't want to help out.

- He has other girls on the side and he got a better offer.

- He has dick problems and he's embarrassed.

- You take too long.

- He's losing interest.

All those are possibilities. I'm going to suggest something pretty cutting edge and bizarre. Ready? Ask him. Have open communications about it. Talk with him. Don't be needy. But just be cool about it.

Report back with the findings and I'll let these listers know the outcome!

Geez. I almost hate to admit it, but this actually makes sense.

Are you a fan?!?

More of a follower. Fans blow.

I like the thread, though.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Scenario 2: Online

This is a different story. There are a lot of possibilities. I'll go with the most likely to the least likely.

- He got interrupted. Just that simple. Sometimes it happens. You're getting down and dirty, stroking or rubbing and then your stupid students start asking questions or your cell mates are making noise. Rude. This is really common. Online fun can be really hot. But a lot of pervs do this stuff at work or in inconvenient locations. Sometimes you have to drop your dick and move on.

- He was finished. He came and didn't want to help out.

- He has other girls on the side and he got a better offer.

- He has dick problems and he's embarrassed.

- You take too long.

- He's losing interest.

'You take too long.'

Quality answers, P. I think there's a poll in there, but if you don't want to do it, I will.

 

[ydahecnot]

Dear Pee-man,

What conic section should one shape his concrete platform like in order to most likely attract extraterrestrials?

AFAF

PS: or Dennis Rodman, whatevs

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dearest pmann,

So I work with this chick who is way closer in age to my son than to me. She’s almost as tall as I am, huge tits, long haired brunette and a fucking stunning ass. She’s got the face of a horse though.

I find her personality to be grating and highly annoying with a laugh that echoes down the hallway and makes me want to bitch slap her till she shuts the fuck up.

And yet, I found myself today during a meeting wondering what she’d look like with my cock down her throat. Is this normal? What should I do about this?

Signed,

Desiring understanding dick emotions

Hey DUDE,

This girl sounds really cool. Mostly, anyway. She's what we say in Italian "lei ha la faccia di un cavallo". But the brunette and huge tits things outweighs the old horse face any day.

Now some would say your comments are misogynistic. But they don't know you like I do. I know you're soft and sensitive on the inside. (ewwww)

Is that normal to imagine your cock down her throat? Yes. I mean, I'm much more refined than that. But the average male imagines his dick on or between some girl's boobs, ass cheeks, lips, vagina or a piece of fruit 356 times a day.

I think the most appropriate thing would be to talk to her. Tell her you want to give her a facial. See how she reacts.

 

[Lonelywife1205]

Hey DUDE,

This girl sounds really cool. Mostly, anyway. She's what we say in Italian "lei ha la faccia di un cavallo". But the brunette and huge tits things outweighs the old horse face any day.

Now some would say your comments are misogynistic. But they don't know you like I do. I know you're soft and sensitive on the inside. (ewwww)

Is that normal to imagine your cock down her throat? Yes. I mean, I'm much more refined than that. But the average male imagines his dick on or between some girl's boobs, ass cheeks, lips, vagina or a piece of fruit 356 times a day.

I think the most appropriate thing would be to talk to her. Tell her you want to give her a facial. See how she reacts.

I think this is the difference between men women...horse faces matter.

 

[blade_rocknut]

I think this is the difference between men women...horse faces matter.

Hey, a woman can have a horse face and still be beautiful on the inside...and from select camera angles.
And doggystyle.

 

[Lonelywife1205]

Hey, a woman can have a horse face and still be beautiful on the inside...and from select camera angles.
And doggystyle.

Point well taken.

I just meant from an initial attraction point of view. It is possible to get past a horse face over time.

 

[Apisto42]

Point well taken.

I just meant from an initial attraction point of view. It is possible to get past a horse face over time.

I find the best way to get over a horse face is to straddle it...

 

[Lonelywife1205]

I find the best way to get over a horse face is to straddle it...

Of course you do...

 

[alwaysaway]

I find the best way to get over a horse face is to straddle it...

Straddle or saddle?

 

[Apisto42]

Straddle or saddle?

Personally, I prefer bareback. This ain’t my first rodeo after all.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Geez. I almost hate to admit it, but this actually makes sense.

More of a follower. Fans blow.

I like the thread, though.

Fans blow... Like blowjobs?

I like the idea of having followers. Sounds very cultish. I've always wanted to start a cult.

'You take too long.'

Quality answers, P. I think there's a poll in there, but if you don't want to do it, I will.

Maybe she did take too long. Sometimes ya gotta get back to work.

Dear Pee-man,

What conic section should one shape his concrete platform like in order to most likely attract extraterrestrials?

AFAF

PS: or Dennis Rodman, whatevs

I'm not sure I understand the question. If you're asking me about contacting ET, I must admit, I have no experience there.

I guess I really want to know... Are you trying to fuck an alien?

 

[Lord Pmann]

I think this is the difference between men women...horse faces matter.

Horse faces matter... That line didn't take off quite like Black Lives Matter did. It made them very sad. Thus the long face. *hi five*

Hey, a woman can have a horse face and still be beautiful on the inside...and from select camera angles.
And doggystyle.

For those moments when I wish lit has a LIKE button.

Straddle or saddle?

You are a clever one.

Personally, I prefer bareback. This ain’t my first rodeo after all.

Ah. Bareback. Can't catch herpes twice!!!

 

[ydahecnot]

As I said, asking for a friend. Have to ask, um, him. “Conic section” seems to blow people’s brains here

 

[Lord Pmann]

Another question

Okay, so here’s another question.

Dear pmann,


I have a question about a guy I met on here.

He is bisexual. I'm definitely hetero and we have a shared interest in cock. He is also actively poly. I'm definitely not and really only want one man. When I talk to him about his poly lifestyle, he mentioned that he could see himself just being with me. He isn’t really required to have multiple people. He and I have met in person a couple of times and it has always been wonderful.

What’s the issue? I feel like I have to be ok with his lack of commitment or risk pushing too hard. Or I ask for more commitment, he gives in, and I risk limiting his true wants and desires.

Sincerely,

Sensitive and Doubtful

Dear SAD,

Well, this is a prickly pickle of a situation you’ve got here. I think the thing that’s going to be most difficult is you’re always going to be competing with other interests. He may say he’s okay with it, but I think it’s going to be an issue.

You may be okay with his desires. But if you want him to just be with you, you’re expecting him to give up what he’s been (mostly) truthful about wanting.

I’ll say this about relationships. Guys want their girls to remain exactly as they are from the moment they meet them. Same weight. Same looks. Same enthusiasm for sucking their sad, old cocks. Girls have a longer term plan. They want to fix them up and shape them into “better” or different people. They think they can work out those kinks. What happens is the guy gets disappointed because she’s no longer the same slut he met. The girl is disappointed because he literally acts the exact same way he did and doesn’t change any behaviours.

So what I’m getting at... you are going to have a struggle here. I don’t think this is going to work in the long haul. Enjoy your meetups. Take them for what they are. But he likes cock and needs multiple partners... you’ll likely never change that.

Sincerely,

Doesn’t like cock but knows a lot about it