Pmann's Advice by Pmann Thread- Ask Me Shit

[kurrginatorX]

If I may be so bold, I think Pmann's advice would be:

Dear cum-drunk whore,

To swallow, or not to swallow, that is the question, so the answer to that query is yes, swallow. Insofar as speed of swallowing is concerned, don't be hasty. Savor it. Roll it around your mouth to experience every nuance of that thick, rich treat.

Apparently I was wrong, as Pmann's response was:

Dear MONTY,

I would never use the European swallow. They use the metric system and we all know the metric system is the devil's measurement system. Metric comes from the Latin Mestrophic which comes from the word Mephistopheles.

Your friend,

Lord P

Therefore, I offer my apologies and regret any hurt or confusion this may have caused.

 

[Trekka]

I’ll say this about relationships. Guys want their girls to remain exactly as they are from the moment they meet them. Same weight. Same looks. Same enthusiasm for sucking their sad, old cocks. Girls have a longer term plan. They want to fix them up and shape them into “better” or different people. They think they can work out those kinks. What happens is the guy gets disappointed because she’s no longer the same slut he met. The girl is disappointed because he literally acts the exact same way he did and doesn’t change any behaviours.

*groans*
You don’t really believe this, do you?

 

[BlackCaramelCreme]

What type of questions would you prefer or would like to be asked about?

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Dear LP,

If I'm posting on a thread in which my post depends on the post above me, but i have that cunt on ignore, is it okay if i skip their sorry ass and use the post above them? (Say yes, because that's what I'm going to do anyway, i just want to see what your answer will be. )

Signed,
Skip, Skip, Skip Over My lance

 

[Lonelywife1205]

Dear LP,

If I'm posting on a thread in which my post depends on the post above me, but i have that cunt on ignore, is it okay if i skip their sorry ass and use the post above them? (Say yes, because that's what I'm going to do anyway, i just want to see what your answer will be. )

Signed,
Skip, Skip, Skip Over My lance

Lance is a woman? or can a man be a cunt? I’m so confused as to why everyone seems to dislike him.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Lance is a woman? or can a man be a cunt? I’m so confused as to why everyone seems to dislike him.

Anyone can be a cunt, if they're cuntish enough.

'lance' is just the latest in a long list of alts (Five? Six?) that he's used to harass women.

 

[Lonelywife1205]

Anyone can be a cunt, if they're cuntish enough.

'lance' is just the latest in a long list of alts (Five? Six?) that he's used to harass women.

Gotcha.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Apparently I was wrong, as Pmann's response was:



Therefore, I offer my apologies and regret any hurt or confusion this may have caused.

No apology necessary. You tried.

*groans*
You don’t really believe this, do you?

Does it apply to 100% of circumstances? No. But the overall theme is pretty accurate. Guys don’t ever want anything to change. Girls see a project. You can’t really be so shocked by that, right? How many times are girls disappointed when their guy doesn’t change their behaviour down the road? He’s still playing video games at 3am like a child and she’s pissed off because she thought that behaviour would change down the road. Or the guy is disappointed she doesn’t want to give him an enthusiastic blowjob after she’s cooked dinner, bathed the kids and put them to bed after the kids were crying about this or that. He just can’t understand why she’s not wet and ready.

 

[Trekka]

Does it apply to 100% of circumstances? No. But the overall theme is pretty accurate. Guys don’t ever want anything to change. Girls see a project. You can’t really be so shocked by that, right? How many times are girls disappointed when their guy doesn’t change their behaviour down the road? He’s still playing video games at 3am like a child and she’s pissed off because she thought that behaviour would change down the road. Or the guy is disappointed she doesn’t want to give him an enthusiastic blowjob after she’s cooked dinner, bathed the kids and put them to bed after the kids were crying about this or that. He just can’t understand why she’s not wet and ready.

Hmm. I think this is a pretty sweeping generalization and ignores those in happy, long term relationships that have learned that life is a journey, and people can and do change over time, sometimes for better, sometimes for worse, but it’s all about adapting to those changes... loving each other through them, and because of them. Learning to accept the static and the dynamic.

What you’ve described is a common dilemma.

But what I’ve described is a common solution.

Feel free to ask *me* for advice, if you need, Lord P.

 

[LegendaryALT]

That's because women mature much faster, than a man. A woman is expected to be responsible for their bodies at a young age and prepared for her future ( like having children, marriage, don't give yourself to the wrong one ). As soon as a woman accepts our invitation, she's evaluating you. Are you good for her ? Could she have a future with you ? Can he provide, protect and show her the affection she craves ?

Men think, am I going to fuck tonight ? How can I get her to give me that sweetness ? We're told to fuck around as much as you can, before you settle down. We weren't prepared for fatherhood at 12 or expected to be.

When you're in a relationship, it's always about how the man needs to evolve, why not the woman ? Because she evolved long ago and is waiting for you to join her.

The more mature we get, quality of company matters more

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Dear Pmann,

I have a complex and somewhat pressing need for wisdom and guidance on a situation. I was driving to work last week when my truck started sputtering, had issues accelerating, and the check engine light came on. There is the small mechanics shop on my way to work and it was only a few blocks ahead. I stopped, and while small the place was clean and the mechanic was very nice, friendly, and knowledgeable. He got me in and up right away. Unfortunately, he found quite a few things wrong with my truck and the estimate was quite high. Something about timing, a shaft, a lube job, blow off, power stroke, but the head was good. Then, much to my astonishment, he said he would be willing to perform the repairs on the house, but um well, let’s just say the offer was rather perverse given the situation I was in. I was rather shocked, but I needed the truck running, so I am embarrassed to say that we were able to come to an agreement. Well now my truck has been running amazingly, better than it has for years. I was hoping you may be able to advise me on how I might be able to turn the check engine light on again?

Thanks,
Can’t understand much shit located under the truck

 

[Lord Pmann]

What type of questions would you prefer or would like to be asked about?

Any kind of questions will do. Doesn’t matter what.

Relationship? Check.
Sex? Check.
Music? Check.
Life advice? Check.
Career advice? Check.
Carpentry advice? Check.
Medical advice? Muthafuckin check. (I’m not a doctor nor do I even watch medical shows so this advice should NOT be taken)

The good news is, if I don’t know the answer, I’ll just make one up. Because that’s just the kind of guy I am.

Dear LP,

If I'm posting on a thread in which my post depends on the post above me, but i have that cunt on ignore, is it okay if i skip their sorry ass and use the post above them? (Say yes, because that's what I'm going to do anyway, i just want to see what your answer will be. )

Signed,
Skip, Skip, Skip Over My lance

Dear SSSOML,

Thanks for the question. Normally I’m anti skipping over people, even if they’re on ignore. Mainly because a lot of people hate me and have me on ignore. And I need the attention. But Lance is a real twat. And I would support anyone giving him shit and just ignoring him. There are several other people I think would do well with being ignored.

Sincerely,

Lord Pmann

 

[Lord Pmann]

Lord P-Mann,

I absolutely in no way NEED it but should I get a new guitar? I ask because i trust your judgement on this.

Sincerely,

Always Xploring

Dear AX,

This is a serious situation. Normally I would redirect you to a mental health therapist for these kinds of negative questions. But instead, I’m going to suggest you log on to Reverb.com and search for whatever item you may want. You mentioned a Fender Custom Shop Strat. Might I recommend a Suhr, Anderson or, if you really want to spend some cash, a DeTemple. Buy it immediately. If you have to sell a vital organ or prostitute yourself to do afford it, go for it.

You have a serious case of GAS (guitar acquisition syndrome) and the only cure is more guitars.

Sincerely,

Former Gas Sufferer

 

[Lord Pmann]

Hmm. I think this is a pretty sweeping generalization and ignores those in happy, long term relationships that have learned that life is a journey, and people can and do change over time, sometimes for better, sometimes for worse, but it’s all about adapting to those changes... loving each other through them, and because of them. Learning to accept the static and the dynamic.

What you’ve described is a common dilemma.

But what I’ve described is a common solution.

Feel free to ask *me* for advice, if you need, Lord P.

I didn’t say it doesn’t get better or it can’t be overcome. I only said it’s a problem in almost every situation. Of course it can be fixed. It wasn’t meant to be a cynical view. It’s just a realistic one. I think it’s one that nearly every relationship goes through. People should adapt and change over time. The guy shouldn’t be up until 3am playing video games every night. The girl should suck his dick sometimes like it’s the first time. But those who don’t grow and mature from that are doomed to be stuck in those thought processes.

However, asking someone’s fundamental desires and needs to change... that’s the prickly pickle.

And, for what it’s worth, years back I asked Trekka for some legitimate advice and she was a hell of an advice giver. She gets my seal of approval for advice giving.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Sorry... I’ve been sick and I’ve not been on here long enough to give proper responses. I have questions and answers to post. Plus several posts in this thread.

I will be back. Get your questions ready!

 

[Trekka]

Sorry... I’ve been sick and I’ve not been on here long enough to give proper responses. I have questions and answers to post. Plus several posts in this thread.

I will be back. Get your questions ready!

Am standing by ready to verify your advice.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Am standing by ready to verify your advice.

I advise you to kindly fuck off.

 

[Suz_anne]

Am standing by ready to verify your advice.

I advise you to kindly fuck off.

Is it weird that I kind of want this to devolve into a fight/wresting match? With chocolate pudding involved.

Also, fwiw, my money is on Trekka. She's feisty.

 

[Trekka]

Is it weird that I kind of want this to devolve into a fight/wresting match? With chocolate pudding involved.

Also, fwiw, my money is on Trekka. She's feisty.

What was that, Pmann? I couldn’t hear you over the sound of Suz favoring me.

 

[Lord Pmann]

What was that, Pmann? I couldn’t hear you over the sound of Suz favoring me.

While you two were kissing each other’s asses I took your Midol and cookie dough.

Check mate.

 

[Trekka]

While you two were kissing each other’s asses I took your Midol and cookie dough.

Check mate.

You sound sensitive tonight. You probably need it more than me.

 

[Suz_anne]

While you two were kissing each other’s asses I took your Midol and cookie dough.

Check mate.

You sound sensitive tonight. You probably need it more than me.

I think he feels crampy and his fingers are probably swollen. I get it.

 

[DDBustyBrit]

Lord Pmann,

I have a number of questions this evening for your consideration...

1. What exactly is it about the question “what are you thinking” that causes a free for all virtual bun fight on such a regular basis?!

2. I’m thinking about starting a new Am Pics thread, not sure whether to even go there again... and if I do whether it should be just Pics, or combined with some erotica... opinion?

3. I’m no longer in the ‘Stable’ business for a number of reasons, including but not limited too - I finally met a man who can more than keep me satisfied alone, he gives me my freedom but reverse psychology appears to be at play here (he’s smart & sneaky), a few men got in trouble and it was just no longer the fun it once was, ‘been there done that and wrote the book’ so I’m over it! But I do still play away occasionally... do I need a new ‘label’ for this misbehavior?

4. Are you the self proclaimed ‘darling of Lit’? Or were you voted in?

5. What’s your take on Brexit?

Cheers mate

 

[Trekka]

I think he feels crampy and his fingers are probably swollen. I get it.

My breasts get incredibly tender. Sometimes it hurts just to put on a shirt! Wonder if his do also?

 

[Suz_anne]

My breasts get incredibly tender. Sometimes it hurts just to put on a shirt! Wonder if his do also?

I'm sure he can't even bear the thought of having his nipples touched right now. And nothing fits right. Everything makes him feel fat.

Chew down those Midol and have a good cry, Pmann. You'll feel right as rain in a couple of days.