~Post baseless lies about the person above you - V.6~

Would rather Mrs Claus use a strap on instead of Santa banging her from behind
Merry Xxxmas
 
Is going to start a TikTok about dildos. “Heyyyyy. It’s your girl, Chloe. Take a look at this little buzzer!”
Has requested to be a special, recurring guest on the show. He plans on wearing a black turtle neck, Ray bands, and a serious expression. Anything I ask will be one word answers, occasionally with a playful slap across my face...but with the dildo, not his hand
 
Likes didldo slaps.
Created a machine that looks like a fan but the blades are all dildos. He made different speed settings depending on how hard you wanted to be "dildo slapped" he tested the strongest setting and now, he can only speak in short, almost sentences... the ghost of paragraphs still haunts him
 
Wanyts to ride the dildo fan.
Refuses to allow anyone but himself ride his greatest, but most dangerous, invention. He still is chasing those extra words and deeper meanings. Elaborations and flowery detail. All he can think instead is "dick...dick... she probably wants dick..."
 
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