~Post baseless lies about the person above you - V.6~

Is determined to one day prove to the world that mushrooms are actually sentient and planning world domination.
 
He has smoked three packs of cigarettes daily since he was six but is convinced he doesn't have a habit.
 
I've heard stories that the person above me secretly turns into a werewolf on Sunday and robs their local convenience store of their batteries. What they're for, I don't know, but I think it's to power a secret robot project they do in their free time.
 
He once was a part of a gang whose sole purpose was to kick the asses of Santa's reindeer, but never Santa himself.
 
Their favorite color is amber brown because it reminds them of the pancake syrup they use as a steak sauce.
 
Is convinced that the original Patterson-Gimlin bigfoot footage from 1967 was actually performed by Ronald Reagan in a costume.
 
Is actually the man on the moon. His home is near the border between the light side and dark side of the moon.
 
He owns a used car lot with a cute dog that isn't much of a guard dog. I bought a car from him once, 10/10 highly recommend.
 
Once tried to actually make a man in his house out of clay, but failed to imbue it with life via a curly straw.
 
Has the entire works of William Shakespeare in old English. And it wasn’t even written in old English.
 
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