Sex toy reviews šŸ„’

Do you like orgasms? Multiple orgasms? Then Iā€™ve got the toy for you.
I donā€™t think Iā€™ll ever use another one after using this. Iā€™ve dubbed it ā€œThe Hall of Famerā€, ā€œOlā€™ Reliableā€ and one other name dedicated to a certain Litster šŸ˜‰

The Amour Vibe by Secret Affaire
(Iā€™d link it but their website is down)

View attachment 2397428

It vibrates and sucks. Omfg, does it ever. The first time I used it, I came so hard that my back arched and my soul left my body. It also has a telescopic ring that moves up and down the shaft but I broke that mechanism from cumming so hard šŸ’¦šŸ’¦. The Secret Affaire replaced it without issue but sadly, I broke the telescopic ring on that one too. My pussy works out, I guess. The vibrating and sucking are more than enough for multiple (Iā€™m talking in the double digits) orgasms. Orgasms that have me screaming, tearing the sheets off the bed (and/or soaking them), punching pillows, clenching my toes (and pussy. RIP telescopic ring) and seeing stars.

Iā€™d say the only slight negative is the clit sucker is a bit noisy (easily muffled by my thicc thighs)

giphy.gif


Also, after over a year of lurking and judging you freaky perverts, Iā€™ve reached my 1000th post!
Letā€™s celebrate!
Oh dear you canā€™t have another orgasm until your soul has returned, otherwise during the next one it will becum detached and forever lost, these souls then go around jacking males off while they sleep in revenge.
 
Oh dear you canā€™t have another orgasm until your soul has returned, otherwise during the next one it will becum detached and forever lost, these souls then go around jacking males off while they sleep in revenge.
Ummmm no. My lost soul would forever be following dudes up the stairs so I could poke their buttholes.
 
Do you like orgasms? Multiple orgasms? Then Iā€™ve got the toy for you.
I donā€™t think Iā€™ll ever use another one after using this. Iā€™ve dubbed it ā€œThe Hall of Famerā€, ā€œOlā€™ Reliableā€ and one other name dedicated to a certain Litster šŸ˜‰

The Amour Vibe by Secret Affaire
(Iā€™d link it but their website is down)

View attachment 2397428

It vibrates and sucks. Omfg, does it ever. The first time I used it, I came so hard that my back arched and my soul left my body. It also has a telescopic ring that moves up and down the shaft but I broke that mechanism from cumming so hard šŸ’¦šŸ’¦. The Secret Affaire replaced it without issue but sadly, I broke the telescopic ring on that one too. My pussy works out, I guess. The vibrating and sucking are more than enough for multiple (Iā€™m talking in the double digits) orgasms. Orgasms that have me screaming, tearing the sheets off the bed (and/or soaking them), punching pillows, clenching my toes (and pussy. RIP telescopic ring) and seeing stars.

Iā€™d say the only slight negative is the clit sucker is a bit noisy (easily muffled by my thicc thighs)

giphy.gif


Also, after over a year of lurking and judging you freaky perverts, Iā€™ve reached my 1000th post!
Letā€™s celebrate!
So... If I buy this toy... Can I get what's in the gif?
 
The Lovense Solace intrigued me in every aspect except the price tag. And while the concept of pairing it remotely with another toy is mind blowing, itā€™s not necessary for me. Just was looking for hands free stroking/vibration.

I chose this route:
https://hungformen.com/pages/hung-ufo-this-male-masturbator-is-truly-out-of-this-world

Short review: glad I bought it, but itā€™s never going to provide an earth shattering experience. It will, however give you nearly two hours of pleasurable edging with moderate vibration and constant stroking between charges. Kind of like an extremely attentive partner who doesnā€™t give the greatest handjob or blowjob, but doesnā€™t tire of trying.

Speaking of fucking a robot, I got a new sex toy. And no, itā€™s not a robot fuckdoll.

Itā€™s this.

Funny thing, apparently based on some pervy history of purchases, I was contacted by one of the sellers who wanted me to do a review of the sex toy. He asked if I would be willing to review it if I got it for free. So, having a willing dick, I decided to oblige.

The toy arrived and I was certain it couldnā€™t be right. The box was massive. Like I ordered an umbrella. And Iā€™m sure youā€™re all thinking, ā€œBut pmann, youā€™re hung like a Clydesdale, isnā€™t that appropriate?ā€

Thank you for the consideration. But this looked too big and too heavy. Anyway, I unboxed it and it was, indeed, huge and heavy.

Below is a pic for reference. The total length is about the length from my elbow to the base of my wrist. It is WAY bigger in person than it appears in the pics on Amazon.



My first impression was that it was too big and heavy and it looked like I was fucking R2-D2ā€™s bottom. I didnā€™t have high hopes. However, no sooner had my dick been lubed up and placed within its robot asshole, I realized I was wrong.

There are four buttons- a power button and three different modes/functions.

The toy has three basic functions- licking, sucking and twisting. The licking and twisting one have multiple different versions (I believe seven different settings per function). Here is a little detail about each of them.

1. Licking- there is a tongue shaped object in there. Does it feel like a tongue? Not really. Does it behave like one? Also not really. However, it does feel amazing and its lack of tongue legitimacy does not deter from its style. The different settings offer different intensities. Most (if not all) of the settings also have some sucking action paired along with it. That works nicely.

2. Sucking- this function used on its own is not super useful. It literally just suctions and then you wonder for a minute how youā€™ll get your dick out. I think that function is for people who are using it as a dick pump. That is not my reason for buying this. It can be paired with the twirling motion, but not the tongue (as sucking is pre-programmed into that one). I thought I would like the sucking function best, but it does nothing really. There arenā€™t multiple settings. You just press and hold and it creates suction until you release or until you get to the maximum level. It doesnā€™t have the easiest pressure release that I can find. When itā€™s at max setting, you arenā€™t just pulling your dick out. You will stretch it like Gumby if you do. Pressing the tongue button releases it.

3. The twirling/twisting motion is really good. I always have a problem with the resolution on sex toys. They usually donā€™t ramp up in small enough increments. They go from too slow to twist my dick off in one click. Again, I believe this has seven different settings and they were honestly all good. Pair these with the suction on the tongue/licking setting and youā€™re in for a good time. The first few settings are a consistent spinning that just increase in power. The next few are a bit different, some pulsing, some going back and forth. They are all great and I normally hate things that change up.

Here are the pros:

- Itā€™s quite easy to use. I donā€™t like reading manuals and I sure as hell donā€™t want to read one for a sex toy. When it arrives, I want to start fucking it. This one was easy enough to figure out.

- The settings are all pretty good. Aside from the sucking by itself, I would use every one. They really are all good enough to make me cum.

- It didnā€™t take much getting used to. The settings immediately worked. It was comfortable for me to use. My dick and I were pleased.

- Itā€™s easy to clean.

- Itā€™s sturdy.

- It feels like it will last.

- It was cheap. I own some decently expensive toys from nicer brands like Lelo and, while it doesnā€™t have the refinement of something like a Lelo, it feels like it will last. It was around $50.

Here are the cons:

- Iā€™d say the overall bulk and weight would be the biggest con for most people. I say most people because it didnā€™t really bother me at all like I thought it would. The size and weight actually made it easier to use. Some might not find that to be the case.

- I wouldnā€™t say this is one that you use for a quick orgasm. This takes some time.

- You have to use lube or your dick may catch on fire. šŸ”„

- It has a proprietary charger. Also not a big deal, nor is it uncommon. But I wish they all had USB chargers.

Overall:

This is, by far my favourite toy Iā€™ve used. Itā€™s the most intense orgasm Iā€™ve had from a toy. Itā€™s definitely a bargain at the price-point.

Buy if you like spending time with a toy and you are looking for an intense orgasm.

Skip if you are looking for something that is smaller and is good for a quickie.

Note: Be prepared to shut it off as soon as you cum if youā€™ve got a really sensitive dick after you cum. My dick is bi-polar and goes from wanting to be touched to hating to be looked at after it cums. If your dick and mine are kindred spirits, just be ready to hold the off button immediately after orgasm.

Alright... research complete. My splatter plot proved conclusive. This sex toy is great.

Here it is.

Male Sex Toys for Men - Male Masturbator Penis Training Vibrator with APP Control, Vibrating Sex Toy Strokers Glans Trainer Stimulator, Mens Sex Machine Masturbators Adult Sex Toys & Games https://a.co/d/67bBDEc

This is my favourite sex toy ever. It doesn't provide the most intense orgasm, like my R2D2 robot looking one. But it's so simple. It's hands free.

Now, a little about my wanking regime... I find whatever porn I'm in the mood for at the time. I search it. Find the right video. Then set the iPad up and enjoy the show whilst I wank or use a sex toy.

Now, I rarely stay on one video. This particular toy is hands free. I can leave it running while I search and fastforward or rewind or whatever. It's amazing. Truly.

Now for the functionality. It's easy to use. You wrap it around your dick, press the button and it vibrates. You need to move it up and down to find the sweet spot. But it's pretty easy.

There are numerous intensities and rhythms. I usually stick with the steady ones, but a couple of the pulses are good. I rarely like that. There's an app, but I have never needed it. I believe you can make your own pulses and share with others.

If I had one request it would be to make it more intense. But that's minor and I realize there are constraints with a toy of this size. Also, my dick probably doesn't need to get used to vibration too much. The female vagina doesn't normally vibrate too much, unless it's a Meth Mouth Molly and she's tweaking.

I give this 5 dicks up. šŸ† šŸ† šŸ† šŸ† šŸ†

Looking for more of a stroker
Iā€™ve quoted a few reviews above that you might want to take a look at. There are probably others in the thread but I canā€™t remember who posted
 
Hereā€™s another review of Pmannā€™s robot:

Okay, with a bit of urging, I bought this. At less the $50, it seemed a safe bet.

My impressions:

Mine had a two-tone plastic casing on the top, sort of blending black and white, and the buttons were the same, but set up in a closer configuration. The body looked the same.

You weren't kidding about the size. It looks like a small thermos, and weighs in at a kiss over a pound and a half.

It is set so you can fill it with either warm or cold water if you like temperature play. I did not try that this time, as I think I wouldn't try that outside of a bath.

Apparently I had some water left from cleaning it, and when it started, it sprayed water out of the blowhole on the top. Be warned. It also does that when you fill it with water, per the reviews on Amazon.

On mine the three buttons were automatic sucking mode, twisting mode, and a manual sucking mode that just works while you press the button. Each of the two automatic modes had seven different settings that you could set for each. You can use either mode on its own, or both. The settings for the sucking mode went from a long, sustained suck to smaller sucks, one after the other, and variations between the two. On its own, not great, but works well with the other mode.

The twisting section has a hard plastic sleeve around the molded silicon, which is nice. Both the nubs and the "tongue" thing at the end are soft but firm. With a lot of lube, it was fine -- not to fast to start with, and going faster, or switching directions after an interval, some quite short. I appreciate the speed of this mode. I have another twisting toy that I am pretty sure they use for attaching bolts to battleships. It seriously feels like it is trying to King Missile you. Not a problem here. The tickler on the end is nice as well. Not a tongue, but nice.

My main complaint is the noise. This is one loud toy. Distracting loud, especially when the pump and the spinner are going at once.

Maybe I was in the wrong mindset, or didn't give it enough time (though I gave it plenty) it just didn't really work for me. Also, the porn issue -- I don't really like a lot of visual porn these days, and have moved more to auralism, which really works for me. So the noise was a big distraction, and probably the main issue for me. I didn't hate it, but I didn't really like it, much less love it.

But I didn't throw it away either. I will try again.

[Edited to add porn issue.]
 
I need your help, oh litsters of the toy review thread. My beloved Evolved G-spot Vibe has died...šŸ„ŗ Do not mourn, for it had a long, loud life. Any suggestions for a similar toy but under $30? I know I can search the webs myself but having suggestions from knowledgeable folks makes me feel better.
 
Anyone have anything new to add? I have a hard time believing no one has a new you or found a new way to use an old one
 
Recently I had a mishap with one of the glass plugs in my set and it shattered on the floor :( , so I bought a new set of plugs that are silicone... I also bought anal beads to try. I've used both the beads and the plugs. I love how the silicone plugs move with me, it's easy to move around and they aren't heavy. I loved my glass ones, but they were so heavy that I felt like my ability to move around was inhibited. The beads were a different sensation and went much deeper than my plugs. It feels kind of like having Ben Wa balls in my ass lol ... and I love playing with Ben Wa balls. :D
 
Recently I had a mishap with one of the glass plugs in my set and it shattered on the floor :( , so I bought a new set of plugs that are silicone... I also bought anal beads to try. I've used both the beads and the plugs. I love how the silicone plugs move with me, it's easy to move around and they aren't heavy. I loved my glass ones, but they were so heavy that I felt like my ability to move around was inhibited. The beads were a different sensation and went much deeper than my plugs. It feels kind of like having Ben Wa balls in my ass lol ... and I love playing with Ben Wa balls. :D
Silicone is where it's at! I'm a fan. šŸ˜
 
looking for vibrator recommendations and advice, need it to be widely available in the USA. Looking for the following characteristics that might be difficult.

  • cordless, chargeable
  • Strong vibration
  • Quiet, as little noise as possible, I realize thatā€™s possibly contradictory to the above.
  • Compact but shaped so it can be inserted
  • Easy to clean
  • Can be used with lube
not bothered about cost, not looking for suckers.
 
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