Tell Blatant Lies About....Yourself

[ncm55]

Jennifer Aniston and I are nipple twins.

That would be impressive

 

[awired50]

I hate that it is Friday.

 

[ncm55]

Jennifer Aniston and I are nipple twins.

If true I would not look ha ha

 

[EctoJohn]

I shit gold.

 

[LeSabreur]

I'm embarrassed to be seen naked.

 

[Breaking_Dawn_Fantasy]

I'm embarrassed to see you naked.

 

[ncm55]

I would never let you see me naked

 

[LeSabreur]

I have never walked completely naked down the middle of the street.

 

[pinkparkhorse]

I’ve never been naked

 

[GraiceeGirl]

I didn't take the last cookie.

 

[snexxer]

I have so much getup and go, it got up and went.

 

[EctoJohn]

I live on a family farm that specifically grows Christmas trees.

 

[LeSabreur]

I hate Christmas.

 

[Cwtchseeker]

I detest Chinese Buffets and refuse to take anyone there for dinner

 

[kreemi_pi]

I think I'll call it an early night and try to get laid or anything

 

[Taegul]

I taught Superman how to fly.

No, wait a sec...

Sorry, I taught The Greatest American Hero how to fly. I get my costumed super-heroes mixed up sometimes.

 

[Breaking_Dawn_Fantasy]

I once made Peter North cry.

 

[EctoJohn]

Total success.

 

[pinkparkhorse]

I am not high right now

 

[Breaking_Dawn_Fantasy]

I once ate just one Lays potato chip.

 

[LeSabreur]

I wear a greasy trench coat and hang around outside retirement homes.

 

[Wand3rlust]

I'm sober.

 

[EctoJohn]

I accidentally had sex once with a total stranger because I bumped into them on the sidewalk.

 

[Lord_Libido]

I am not high right now

Neither am I.

 

[EctoJohn]

I'm writing this from the bottom of my pool.