The beauty of submissive men

[Badger78]

Caring dominance

Great thread. Couldn't agree more. I love it when I'm in a submissive mood and the wife falls in to character and very tenderly dominates me. I guess it's a mothering thing.

When I'm really stressed and anxious about work etc it's such a release to give myself over to her. Sometimes I play the young reluctant and other times I let her push my head in to the pillow, push the small of my back down and drag her fingers over my exposed hole.

There's sometimes a little spanking but it's not cruel, just forceful.

Uh oh. Pants getting tight...

 

[Veroe]

Thanks Badger. That gives me a great idea for a topic to discuss.

What gentle or caring dominance mean in contrast to uncaring and hard dominance?

Is there such a thing as being too cruel or too kind for a dominant lady?

 

[ShyMaleSub]

Great thread. Couldn't agree more. I love it when I'm in a submissive mood and the wife falls in to character and very tenderly dominates me. I guess it's a mothering thing.

When I'm really stressed and anxious about work etc it's such a release to give myself over to her. Sometimes I play the young reluctant and other times I let her push my head in to the pillow, push the small of my back down and drag her fingers over my exposed hole.

There's sometimes a little spanking but it's not cruel, just forceful.

Uh oh. Pants getting tight...

Yep, getting my pants tight too.

 

[Erochic]

Welcome back Erochic! It has been a while. It is always great to read your comments and thoughts. Yes I have imagined many times what those two do in the bedroom, I bet there is some D/s. CASTLE is a fun series.

ES

Welcome back Erochic.

I don't watch Castle. Though I do love Nathan Fillion, and have enjoyed several episodes I've seen in reruns. Its just I get really upset with ALL the procedurals that get a little cookie cutter and really predictable on network television.

I haven't seen enough of the dynamic between the characters to speculate whether either of them needs a safeword behind closed doors.

I really have the hots for Nathan Fillion (and Ewan McGregor too... After Moulin Rouge).
- and he comes across to me as a pleaser in the best possible way
And whether or not that is really true in real life, he nails in the way his character comes across. I'd happily have him pleasing me

There have been hints as to her liking to be dominant (and that wonderful scene when she showed that she was unexpectedly knowledgable about things at the dominatrix's which got a wonderful hot-under-the-collar reaction from Castle), but who knows how full on things are. But whatever is happening in the bedroom I'm sure that it's exactly the way she wants it and he loves that.

Hehe... I don't actually watch the procedural stuff much - though do like it when it involves the two yummy detectives - Ryan and Esposito... Who I could also see enjoying wearing the handcuffs sometimes.
And they work so well as a team under a woman's direction ....

Whew.... Ummm.... Yes... What was I saying?

Thankyou, thank you for that sweet welcome back!!! It feels really good to be welcomed back so nicely. I was really touched and flattered to see that you've been referring to things I said - I'm hardly an expert at all... But I'm very happy if I helped to contribute to the conversation about what it means to be a submissive man or a dominant woman.

I was very happy to see another great poster PDatura - I loved a number of things she had to say - very insightful.

 

[Erochic]

Welcome back Erochic! It has been a while. It is always great to read your comments and thoughts. Yes I have imagined many times what those two do in the bedroom, I bet there is some D/s. CASTLE is a fun series.

ES

Welcome back Erochic.

I don't watch Castle. Though I do love Nathan Fillion, and have enjoyed several episodes I've seen in reruns. Its just I get really upset with ALL the procedurals that get a little cookie cutter and really predictable on network television.

I haven't seen enough of the dynamic between the characters to speculate whether either of them needs a safeword behind closed doors.

I really have the hots for Nathan Fillion (and Ewan McGregor too... After Moulin Rouge).
- and he comes across to me as a pleaser in the best possible way
And whether or not that is really true in real life, he nails in the way his character comes across. I'd happily have him pleasing me

There have been hints as to her liking to be dominant (and that wonderful scene when she showed that she was unexpectedly knowledgable about things at the dominatrix's which got a wonderful hot-under-the-collar reaction from Castle), but who knows how full on things are. But whatever is happening in the bedroom I'm sure that it's exactly the way she wants it and he loves that.

Hehe... I don't actually watch the procedural stuff much - though do like it when it involves the two yummy detectives - Ryan and Esposito... Who I could also see enjoying wearing the handcuffs sometimes.
And they work so well as a team under a woman's direction ....

Whew.... Ummm.... Yes... What was I saying?

Thankyou, thank you for that sweet welcome back!!! It feels really good to be welcomed back so nicely. I was really touched and flattered to see that you've been referring to things I said - I'm hardly an expert at all... But I'm very happy if I helped to contribute to the conversation about what it means to be a submissive man or a dominant woman.

I was very happy to see another great poster PDatura - I loved a number of things she had to say - very insightful.

 

[Erochic]

I just read back through the whole thread... And I'm amazed how confident I was sounding.
I'm feeling rather uncertain and tired - lots of things have happened .. And I finally let go of someone I really loved - he left a year ago but we maintained a mostly online relationship... but I couldn't deal with the long distance and I was starting to feel controlled.

I'm looking to move forward with meeting some new men... And yes enjoying my dominance... But on the other hand it all feels too hard.

I just want to be me... And still be able to find the guy that can submit to me the way I want... And I don't know if it's possible.
I think the more I care about someone the more difficult it is to dom them.... And I find myself doubting if I am really dominant.
But... If I didn't find it a real turn on I wouldn't want to keep trying.

 

[eroticspank]

I just read back through the whole thread... And I'm amazed how confident I was sounding.
I'm feeling rather uncertain and tired - lots of things have happened .. And I finally let go of someone I really loved - he left a year ago but we maintained a mostly online relationship... but I couldn't deal with the long distance and I was starting to feel controlled.

I'm looking to move forward with meeting some new men... And yes enjoying my dominance... But on the other hand it all feels too hard.

I just want to be me... And still be able to find the guy that can submit to me the way I want... And I don't know if it's possible.
I think the more I care about someone the more difficult it is to dom them.... And I find myself doubting if I am really dominant.
But... If I didn't find it a real turn on I wouldn't want to keep trying.

It is nice to read your thoughts, even your uncertain and doubtful ones. We all have those emotions, it is just few of us willing to express them. So thank you.

In your case, I feel you need to hear there are men out there that truly crave your dominance and assertion. For us, it is about pleasing our partner and knowing our submission is pleasing. The other part of it to me is your way with words. It may be easier to say things online to us, never have met you. But the turn on for me IS the desire in your words and voice. Describing what you enjoy, what turns you on is an aphrodisiac in itself and compels us to follow your lead, submit to your storm of lust. Let your inner cravings come out, get on top and ride to your hearts content.

PS I do remember a scene in CASTLE where Detective Beckett talks about using her Handcuffs in the bedroom and Castle gets very red in the face/turned on.

ES

 

[ShyMaleSub]

PS I do remember a scene in CASTLE where Detective Beckett talks about using her Handcuffs in the bedroom and Castle gets very red in the face/turned on.

ES

Hmmmm....remind me to check the On Demand menu for CASTLE episodes.

 

[Veroe]

A little status report for those who may be interested in something I posted here a while back. As some of you may know I primarily gravitate to the Sexual Roleplaying Forum and have several underway over there.

One of them was one of my first forays into writing a female character and a domme too based off of the Vampire Queen books I basically spammed this thread with. It had been going well and I was amazed at how well the character was coming to me (basically my dream domme), and then my cowriter vanished for a month.

It was too bad too, because I was really missing writing Lorellei, but fortunately he's returned and we've kicked off the story where we left off, and have started our first sex scene.

It's really going well and I haven't felt any weirdness in writing a sexscene from the other gender's perspective which is why most RPers tend to stick with characters from their own proverbial teams gender-wise.

Just finished a post that was really hot and one I'm really proud of.

Sorry if this is a little too off topic or spamming. I just needed to vent some of my excitement over this.

 

[Erochic]

A little status report for those who may be interested in something I posted here a while back. As some of you may know I primarily gravitate to the Sexual Roleplaying Forum and have several underway over there.

One of them was one of my first forays into writing a female character and a domme too based off of the Vampire Queen books I basically spammed this thread with. It had been going well and I was amazed at how well the character was coming to me (basically my dream domme), and then my cowriter vanished for a month.

It was too bad too, because I was really missing writing Lorellei, but fortunately he's returned and we've kicked off the story where we left off, and have started our first sex scene.

It's really going well and I haven't felt any weirdness in writing a sexscene from the other gender's perspective which is why most RPers tend to stick with characters from their own proverbial teams gender-wise.

Just finished a post that was really hot and one I'm really proud of.

Sorry if this is a little too off topic or spamming. I just needed to vent some of my excitement over this.

Well done!
That's fabulous news!!

 

[Erochic]

Again off topic ... But it was interesting as I was thinking about whether I am really dominant or not... and of course no test can capture the subtleties of anyone's desires, but I thought my kink test was interesting

== Results from http://bdsmtest.org/ ==
94% Dominant
92% Primal (Hunter)
91% Voyeur
90% Non-monogamist
89% Rigger
87% Exhibitionist
79% Experimentalist
74% Master/Mistress
55% Rope Bunny
54% Switch
46% Vanilla
45% Brat Tamer
45% Primal (Prey)
38% Owner
33% Daddy/Mommy
24% Sadist
21% Masochist
20% Submissive
17% Brat
14% Ageplayer
7% Degrader
6% Girl/Boy
3% Slave
3% Pet
1% Degradee

Food for thought....

 

[Erochic]

Again off topic ... But it was interesting as I was thinking about whether I am really dominant or not... and of course no test can capture the subtleties of anyone's desires, but I thought my kink test was interesting

== Results from http://bdsmtest.org/ ==
94% Dominant
92% Primal (Hunter)
91% Voyeur
90% Non-monogamist
89% Rigger
87% Exhibitionist
79% Experimentalist
74% Master/Mistress
55% Rope Bunny
54% Switch
46% Vanilla
45% Brat Tamer
45% Primal (Prey)
38% Owner
33% Daddy/Mommy
24% Sadist
21% Masochist
20% Submissive
17% Brat
14% Ageplayer
7% Degrader
6% Girl/Boy
3% Slave
3% Pet
1% Degradee

Food for thought....

I think rigger is actually a bit higher than that, and non-monogamous is lower,,, because ultimately I just want one special person, and perhaps I'm a little bit Mommy than that... But otherwise it was pretty spot on.

 

[pete]

I think rigger is actually a bit higher than that, and non-monogamous is lower,,, because ultimately I just want one special person, and perhaps I'm a little bit Mommy than that... But otherwise it was pretty spot on.

i'll have to look up some of these terms.
"rope bunny" is my favorite.

 

[Erochic]

i'll have to look up some of these terms.
"rope bunny" is my favorite.

I actually don't really know what most of them mean myself.

Rigger means someone who likes tying someone else up - but that list doesn't really differentiate between someone is is into all the fancy rope stuff, and someone like me who just wants a pair of handcuffs and a scarf or 2 and a bit of desire, domination and fun.

A rope bunny is the tie-ee

 

[Erochic]

Ahh... I'm feeling depressed tonight. I've met 4 guys in the last few days... And no leads at all.

2 ghosted on me after a first innocent meeting which I actually thought well (one just today), one ended up being a dick... And not really submissive although pretty fetishy (at least his lust for me was flattering albeit rather creepy), and the last one wasn't my type at all and again didn't really understand submission... I haven't emailed him and he hasn't emailed me either.

PDatura nailed it earlier about it not really being a Domme shortage, but rather it being a shortage of decent subs.

I don't want that much... I want a decent guy that I can spend time with, have fun and good conversation... And then tie to a bed and fuck his face.

 

[NoJo]

That test was a bit obvious -- basically it asked 'Do you like to be tied up?' If you said agree, it scored you higher for that -- duh.

Needless to say, it got me right (pretty much Erochic's results reflected in a lake)

 

[pete]

I don't want that much... I want a decent guy that I can spend time with, have fun and good conversation... And then tie to a bed and fuck his face.

what more could a girl need?

sorry you've had some bad luck lately.
hope it turns around for ya

 

[Erochic]

what more could a girl need?

An ability to breathe through his ears?
I've often (only half jokingly) thought that a snorkel arrangement would be a good idea.

sorry you've had some bad luck lately.
hope it turns around for ya

Thank you.
It was all rather easy the last time I tried this, so I guess I forgot that it's hard to find someone really.
And maybe I'm putting the wrong kind of energy out there... So perhaps it's time to regroup a little.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Ahh... I'm feeling depressed tonight. I've met 4 guys in the last few days... And no leads at all.

2 ghosted on me after a first innocent meeting which I actually thought well (one just today), one ended up being a dick... And not really submissive although pretty fetishy (at least his lust for me was flattering albeit rather creepy), and the last one wasn't my type at all and again didn't really understand submission... I haven't emailed him and he hasn't emailed me either.

PDatura nailed it earlier about it not really being a Domme shortage, but rather it being a shortage of decent subs.

I don't want that much... I want a decent guy that I can spend time with, have fun and good conversation... And then tie to a bed and fuck his face.

It was all rather easy the last time I tried this, so I guess I forgot that it's hard to find someone really.
And maybe I'm putting the wrong kind of energy out there... So perhaps it's time to regroup a little.

 

[ARoseSoSweet]

Ahh... I'm feeling depressed tonight. I've met 4 guys in the last few days... And no leads at all.

2 ghosted on me after a first innocent meeting which I actually thought well (one just today), one ended up being a dick... And not really submissive although pretty fetishy (at least his lust for me was flattering albeit rather creepy), and the last one wasn't my type at all and again didn't really understand submission... I haven't emailed him and he hasn't emailed me either.

PDatura nailed it earlier about it not really being a Domme shortage, but rather it being a shortage of decent subs.

I don't want that much... I want a decent guy that I can spend time with, have fun and good conversation... And then tie to a bed and fuck his face.

That sounds about right based on my experience. Many males are curious but when you get right down to it, they realize they don't really want to sub. As you said, many don't seem to get what being a sub truly is.

I have had many that I met and never heard from again. Very frustrating.

I like the snorkel arrangement but then he wouldn't be able to use his mouth... lol. So breathing through the ears is likely the best option

 

[coati]

Ahh... I'm feeling depressed tonight. I've met 4 guys in the last few days... And no leads at all.

2 ghosted on me after a first innocent meeting which I actually thought well (one just today), one ended up being a dick... And not really submissive although pretty fetishy (at least his lust for me was flattering albeit rather creepy), and the last one wasn't my type at all and again didn't really understand submission... I haven't emailed him and he hasn't emailed me either.

PDatura nailed it earlier about it not really being a Domme shortage, but rather it being a shortage of decent subs.

I don't want that much... I want a decent guy that I can spend time with, have fun and good conversation... And then tie to a bed and fuck his face.

I've had much better luck finding great lovers by doing real life activities, not through the internet. Don't know why, exactly, but that has been my experience.

I had one three-year experience with a Domme who I met walking her dogs in a park. From the moment I met her I wanted to serve. I found her absolutely mesmerizing.

She was very well-read, and continually surprised me with her comments. Early in our relationship I was day-dreaming about burying my face in her muff, while she was reading a book and eating breakfast, when she suddenly looked up from the page she was reading and said, "If you are really good, someday I will sit on your face."

 

[Veroe]

Ahh... I'm feeling depressed tonight. I've met 4 guys in the last few days... And no leads at all.

2 ghosted on me after a first innocent meeting which I actually thought well (one just today), one ended up being a dick... And not really submissive although pretty fetishy (at least his lust for me was flattering albeit rather creepy), and the last one wasn't my type at all and again didn't really understand submission... I haven't emailed him and he hasn't emailed me either.

PDatura nailed it earlier about it not really being a Domme shortage, but rather it being a shortage of decent subs.

I don't want that much... I want a decent guy that I can spend time with, have fun and good conversation... And then tie to a bed and fuck his face.

The lack of decent guys: that's pretty much what vanilla girls complain about too minus the wanting to tie the man to a bed and fuck his face.

All my RL relationships have been vanilla, but all of them have much the same rotten luck so sympathies erochic.

 

[talmet]

I could fall for you

I don't want that much... I want a decent guy that I can spend time with, have fun and good conversation... And then tie to a bed and fuck his face.

FM Porn videos don't do anything for me too much spanking, spitting, shouting.... for me the turn-on is the control and pleasure giving. Erochic thanks for starting a great thread and all the brilliant contributions.

 

[Ksbipantyluvr]

Am enjoying this thread

Sub, bi male in Indiana here. Would love to find a loving Domme.

 

[ShyMaleSub]

The lack of decent guys: that's pretty much what vanilla girls complain about too minus the wanting to tie the man to a bed and fuck his face.

All my RL relationships have been vanilla, but all of them have much the same rotten luck so sympathies erochic.

I suspect a lot of the vanilla girls really want to "tie the man to a bed and fuck his face" but, like a lot of us, are too inhibited to act on it.

A Domme like Erochic is a rare and refreshing find. She really cares about those who submit to her and can have a real relationship with them but can also find the mutual excitement in being able to "tie the man to a bed and fuck his face" as well as administering a "refreshing" punishment. Unfortunately for her, there are many, myself included, who want to experience the "thrill" of submission without the commitment either because we're too comfortable in the vanilla life or too committed to a vanilla person (not that the latter is a bad thing).

I do hope, Erochic, that your search is fruitful.