The Isolated Blurt BDSM Thread

[Chiara_searches]

Wow. Just wow.

Poverty isn't just a game...

You’ve lost your job. You’ve lost your house. You’re down to your last $1,000. Can you make it through the month?

Jenny Nicholson is tired of hearing how the poor are poor because they make poor choices. Let’s see what kind of choices you make when it’s your turn to be flattened by the economy.

That’s the idea behind Spent, an online game Nicholson created to challenge popular misconceptions about poverty. Play it at playspent.org. ​

There's a lot more background in the story (first link).

I ended up with a bit over $500 at the end of the month... but $700 rent due the next day.

I didn't play 'cause I basically live it right now. But I'm hopeful people are learning from it.

 

[bhndblueyes88]

I had enough for my rent until the last day of the month when my damn mother decided she couldn't pay for her own $100 medication.

Even in hypothetical situations, I'm easily guilted into doing what other people want me to do. It may pathological....

I found that in order to get even as close as I got, I had to be a bit cold hearted. Of course, the whole scenario would get easier without, say, kids. Or with a working spouse. Or a mom with 100 dollar medication. Or with some smarter decisions I wasn't able to decide (like a phone plan that's not 100/month, or the kind of vehicle I had or something like). But that would all be needlessly complicated and doesn't help their point as much. Which is fine, I'm not criticizing. Just commenting.



Blurt: The family I chose to adopt my horse is going to be in the area on Friday and wants to pick him up then. I'M NOT READY *blubber*

 

[Lilac_Sky]

Where the fuck did September go? Need to get grades ready for first term interim reports for next week .. well, if the rest of the school year goes this fast it will be summer again before i know it.

 

[CutieMouse]

Wow. Just wow.

Poverty isn't just a game...

You’ve lost your job. You’ve lost your house. You’re down to your last $1,000. Can you make it through the month?

Jenny Nicholson is tired of hearing how the poor are poor because they make poor choices. Let’s see what kind of choices you make when it’s your turn to be flattened by the economy.

That’s the idea behind Spent, an online game Nicholson created to challenge popular misconceptions about poverty. Play it at playspent.org. ​

There's a lot more background in the story (first link).

I ended up with a bit over $500 at the end of the month... but $700 rent due the next day.

The theory behind the game is good; however, [IMO, as a single mom who has lived on the edge more often than I'd like] it doesn't offer many common sense options, and is too black/white.

I was given two options when my child was bullied over the "free lunch kids" - suck up and pay the $ for school lunches (which are nutritional disasters to begin with, IMO) or have them starve. It reminded me of a coworker who saw a yahoo article on a family that had been unemployed for over a year - she was horrified that "the poor babies are going hungry!" (her specifics were that they didn't have juice boxes or gogurts or potato chips in their lunches); whereas I read the article and saw their brown bag lunch was a peanut butter sandwich on whole wheat, carrots, an apple, and $ for milk at the cafeteria. In my head I was going "Grain, protein, fruit, vegetable, dairy... nothing overly processed, or fried, or full of food dyes or cartoon characters. Sounds like a passable lunch to me." In my house if that happened, we'd discuss nutrition, bullying, tools to deal with both, and call it a day. (The principal's office would be getting a call that afternoon re: lunch monitors and bullying.)

Same child is invited to a birthday party, and the options are spend $$, go without a gift, or skip the party. I've been in that situation before, and we made a gift/picked a toy from their own collection as a gift.

The groceries section was a joke. I'm in a commissioned sales position, and recently sales have been down; I've been eating out of my pantry WAY more than ideal (because eventually the pantry will start looking pretty bare), but I did 2 weeks of grocery shopping today for $30. I won't be eating as many fresh fruits/veggies as I normally do, but I already don't use paper towels, or buy drink mixes, or purchase convenience foods because they aren't as healthy/practical to me as scratch. Yes it's more work; yes it means making time to do it - but when your budget is that tight, time = money; if someone else isn't going to pay me, I'll pay myself (in money saved and put towards a higher priority).

There weren't options to make partial payments on bills, or to ask the utility company about charitable alternatives or payment plans - just pay the bill or have a utility cut off. Most cities have non-profit organizations that can help with overdue bills (at least once), and I know in states like Texas, the utility companies advertise programs for reduced payments because it looks bad to have the elderly dying from heat stroke, just because they couldn't pay the $500 electric bill in August.

A kid broke my window - if I knew which kid, I'd be asking their parents to pay the $100. If I didn't, I'd be at Home Depot asking advice on how to fix it myself (for less than $100).

BTW I ran out of $$ on day 27.

I have been juggling this kind of shit for YEARS now. I thank god that even in a struggling economy, and even with the occasional insecurity of commissioned sales I have a good job with health benefits (I went 5 years without medical insurance as an option). If I'd chosen options that went against my personal code of ethics (taking a kids $10 birthday money, or giving in and feeding them school lunches) I'd have fared either better or worse.

Bah.

I get that most people don't have ANY idea what it's like to struggle, and understand the lesson behind the game... but I hope to god most people aren't as clueless as that game makes them out to be.

 

[BiBunny]

I agree with everything the Mouse has said. I've been poor as shit, and I'm just now crawling out of the hole. But some of those choices weren't the most sensible. If you can't pay bills, you don't need a $100 cell phone plan, for example. Also? I know I don't have kids, but if I did and they came home blubbering to me about people making fun of them for getting free lunch, I'd tell them to suck it up. Jesus Christ.

 

[bhndblueyes88]

The theory behind the game is good; however, [IMO, as a single mom who has lived on the edge more often than I'd like] it doesn't offer many common sense options, and is too black/white.

I get that most people don't have ANY idea what it's like to struggle, and understand the lesson behind the game... but I hope to god most people aren't as clueless as that game makes them out to be.

A lot of the food options were nonsense, really. I felt like they didn't really think about what you can buy cheap at the store. Dried beans would be vastly better than canned beans, they didn't even mentioned canned fruits or vegetables. And while I've never seen an edible pack of hotdogs for a dollar, I've seen plenty of edible tuna for that price, and it's a lot healthier.

I imagine they didn't want to make the game more complicated than necessary to keep people from walking away from it (similar to tl;dr), and to make their point that people frequently are poor despite their decisions, not because of them. But they did leave out a LOT of sensible options that may end up working against their point..Why didn't they at least offer better decisions? Why do I have a 100 dollar phone bill, 200+ car insurance bill, etc...etc...? My phone plan now is only 40/month and my scooter insurance is 30...and I COULD have gotten it for only 15/month. The hypothetical game-me seems to have made some poor initial decisions and/or is too stupid to think of ways to decrease one's bills.

And wtf was I doing living off my ccard for ages in the first place? Why did I wait so long to get a job? What was I doing between losing my job and losing my house and then being down to 1000 dollars, twiddling my thumbs?

 

[BiBunny]

And wtf was I doing living off my ccard for ages in the first place? Why did I wait so long to get a job? What was I doing between losing my job and losing my house and then being down to 1000 dollars, twiddling my thumbs?

I've been there and done that with the card. Sometimes, you really *don't* have a choice.

 

[bhndblueyes88]

I've been there and done that with the card. Sometimes, you really *don't* have a choice.

No I understand to an extent. I had to do so between coming home from Australia this last summer and the start of the new semester. It wouldn't have been so bad since I'm capable of living pretty cheap when I choose to, but I had (And still have) all those flights on the card...

But like...unless there's some unmentioned background, it looks like the series of events was:

lose job
live on ccard (Despite, apparently, having over 1000 dollars in savings?) lose house (I presume this happened for a reasonable amount of time to lead to losing one's house entirely. This sort of thing does not happen quickly, correct?)
Get down to 1000 dollars savings
OH! Maybe I should get a new job!! D'OH! (I'm assuming that with the ease I acquired a job in the game, I was previously able to in this hypothetical scenario)


I mean...maybe I got the wrong impression, but if this was the series of events....

 

[BiBunny]

No I understand to an extent. I had to do so between coming home from Australia this last summer and the start of the new semester. It wouldn't have been so bad since I'm capable of living pretty cheap when I choose to, but I had (And still have) all those flights on the card...

But like...unless there's some unmentioned background, it looks like the series of events was:

lose job
live on ccard (Despite, apparently, having over 1000 dollars in savings?) lose house (I presume this happened for a reasonable amount of time to lead to losing one's house entirely. This sort of thing does not happen quickly, correct?)
Get down to 1000 dollars savings
OH! Maybe I should get a new job!! D'OH! (I'm assuming that with the ease I acquired a job in the game, I was previously able to in this hypothetical scenario)


I mean...maybe I got the wrong impression, but if this was the series of events....

Yeah, that IS pretty stupid. But I actually would expect it from someone who'd never had to do without everything they ever wanted, which is sad.

 

[Keroin]

I've been poor by Western standards. Not destitute but definitely living well below the poverty line.

I've also seen real poverty in places where there are no food banks, no potable water, etc.

I have nothing but sympathy for those who struggle financially. What boggles me though is the number of people who complain about money problems and then waste money on things they don't really need. If you're barely making rent, you don't need cable TV. I lived for years without television, it can be done. Trust me. And that's just one example. I knew a woman who was 20K in debt, making minimum wage, always whining about it, but was still shelling out money for Beanie Babies. Beanie Babies? WTF?

 

[bhndblueyes88]

I've been poor by Western standards. Not destitute but definitely living well below the poverty line.

I've also seen real poverty in places where there are no food banks, no potable water, etc.

I have nothing but sympathy for those who struggle financially. What boggles me though is the number of people who complain about money problems and then waste money on things they don't really need. If you're barely making rent, you don't need cable TV. I lived for years without television, it can be done. Trust me. And that's just one example. I knew a woman who was 20K in debt, making minimum wage, always whining about it, but was still shelling out money for Beanie Babies. Beanie Babies? WTF?

Beanie Babies are an INVESTMENT! DUH!!!

But yah. I mean, I sometimes whine too because I'm human, but if I ever get really morose, I just count my lucky stars I'm not living in the rural south african neighborhoods we'd drive through between game reserves.

 

[Lilac_Sky]

Watching a cake challenge on Food Network and am crying when the one cake artist's husband smashes her cake .... you could see his love and care and protectiveness when he did it (the wife was collapsing under stress of life in general and the cake challenge was just too much on her) ... I spent most of my life wanting someone to love me like that ... giddy and happy that I have it now.

 

[CutieMouse]

I've been poor by Western standards. Not destitute but definitely living well below the poverty line.

I've also seen real poverty in places where there are no food banks, no potable water, etc.

I have nothing but sympathy for those who struggle financially. What boggles me though is the number of people who complain about money problems and then waste money on things they don't really need. If you're barely making rent, you don't need cable TV. I lived for years without television, it can be done. Trust me. And that's just one example. I knew a woman who was 20K in debt, making minimum wage, always whining about it, but was still shelling out money for Beanie Babies. Beanie Babies? WTF?

Yep. A local talk radio guy likes to remind people that we are the only nation on the planet, where poor people have cell phones, cable TV, their own car, and [often] $$ for cigarettes.

A [perpetually negative] coworker was making a big stink that her cell phone was turned off... but spent the entire summer complaining about her $500+ electric bills because she left the house set to 72 while at work, so the dog would be comfortable enough. When I was like wow - I keep my house at 90 when I'm at work, 80 when I get home, and 75 to sleep... she accused me of animal cruelty because my cat was forced to live in 90 degree heat. (Yeah. Hi. My highest electric bill all summer was $150, and I'm not the one who's cell was turned off. )

 

[bhndblueyes88]

Watching a cake challenge on Food Network and am crying when the one cake artist's husband smashes her cake .... you could see his love and care and protectiveness when he did it (the wife was collapsing under stress of life in general and the cake challenge was just too much on her) ... I spent most of my life wanting someone to love me like that ... giddy and happy that I have it now.

...see I've spent most of my life making sure I don't have someone like that.

Make a stand if you need to...but don't you dare, DARE, ruin my work for me or interfere with what I'm working towards, I don't care how stressed it is making me. In my opinion, it's a gesture of total disrespect towards me, my dreams, and my effort. Get in a yelling match with me, drag me into counselling, try to convince me to change my mind about what I'm doing...but don't you TOUCH what I'm doing. God can you imagine working so hard on something like a cake and then having someone destroy it? It'd drive me to murder.

It's a good thing Michelangelo didn't have a man like that. We'd ever have the Sistine Chapel.

btw, I'm TOTALLY not ragging on what you want in life If you want someone who will force you to keep from driving yourself bonkers, there is absolutely nothing bad about that. It'd just piss me off to hell and high water I'm just sharing. Sharing is caring

 

[Keroin]

Make a stand if you need to...but don't you dare, DARE, ruin my work for me or interfere with what I'm working towards, I don't care how stressed it is making me.

Word.

 

[Keroin]

Yep. A local talk radio guy likes to remind people that we are the only nation on the planet, where poor people have cell phones, cable TV, their own car, and [often] $$ for cigarettes.

A [perpetually negative] coworker was making a big stink that her cell phone was turned off... but spent the entire summer complaining about her $500+ electric bills because she left the house set to 72 while at work, so the dog would be comfortable enough. When I was like wow - I keep my house at 90 when I'm at work, 80 when I get home, and 75 to sleep... she accused me of animal cruelty because my cat was forced to live in 90 degree heat. (Yeah. Hi. My highest electric bill all summer was $150, and I'm not the one who's cell was turned off. )

Oh yeah. Baffling. I mean, I'm no financial wizard but even I can figure out money saving basics...like thermostat regulation.

Animal cruelty? Ha ha ha ha ha!!!!

 

[bhndblueyes88]

A [perpetually negative] coworker was making a big stink that her cell phone was turned off... but spent the entire summer complaining about her $500+ electric bills because she left the house set to 72 while at work, so the dog would be comfortable enough. When I was like wow - I keep my house at 90 when I'm at work, 80 when I get home, and 75 to sleep... she accused me of animal cruelty because my cat was forced to live in 90 degree heat. (Yeah. Hi. My highest electric bill all summer was $150, and I'm not the one who's cell was turned off. )

Right now I'm gearing up to have to argue with my roommate to grow some balls and deal with tough temperatures. Our power bill is strangely high (140 for a 2br with low use of AC), and I want us to cut down to using as little AC/heat as possible. Which is rough in the midwest but, whatever, space heater. She looked at me like I had grown horns.

 

[BiBunny]

...see I've spent most of my life making sure I don't have someone like that.

Make a stand if you need to...but don't you dare, DARE, ruin my work for me or interfere with what I'm working towards, I don't care how stressed it is making me. In my opinion, it's a gesture of total disrespect towards me, my dreams, and my effort. Get in a yelling match with me, drag me into counselling, try to convince me to change my mind about what I'm doing...but don't you TOUCH what I'm doing. God can you imagine working so hard on something like a cake and then having someone destroy it? It'd drive me to murder.

It's a good thing Michelangelo didn't have a man like that. We'd ever have the Sistine Chapel.

btw, I'm TOTALLY not ragging on what you want in life If you want someone who will force you to keep from driving yourself bonkers, there is absolutely nothing bad about that. It'd just piss me off to hell and high water I'm just sharing. Sharing is caring

Yep. I would end him and all that he loved. You do NOT know what's best for me. I know what's best for me, and you'd best keep your paws off it if you'd like to keep them attached to your body. Kthanxbi.

BTW, I'm totally not stalking you, however much it might look like it today, LOL.

 

[CutieMouse]

Right now I'm gearing up to have to argue with my roommate to grow some balls and deal with tough temperatures. Our power bill is strangely high (140 for a 2br with low use of AC), and I want us to cut down to using as little AC/heat as possible. Which is rough in the midwest but, whatever, space heater. She looked at me like I had grown horns.

I'm the alien/freak at work. I think we had something like 64 days this summer that were over 100; 42 of them were in a row; we even broke a record for the most consecutive days above 105.

I refused to turn the AC on until June 1, kept it at the aforementioned temperatures all summer, and turned the AC off/opened the windows as soon as the first cool front moved through a few weeks ago. I also live in "the barrio", line dry my laundry, don't have a dishwasher, bring my lunch every day... LOL

 

[bhndblueyes88]

I'm the alien/freak at work. I think we had something like 64 days this summer that were over 100; 42 of them were in a row; we even broke a record for the most consecutive days above 105.

I refused to turn the AC on until June 1, kept it at the aforementioned temperatures all summer, and turned the AC off/opened the windows as soon as the first cool front moved through a few weeks ago. I also live in "the barrio", line dry my laundry, don't have a dishwasher, bring my lunch every day... LOL

I'm not that much of a freak, but I see no reason to keep the A/C high or low if I spend most of my time in my room and can manage the temperature with a space heater or a fan.

 

[Mz_Cunningham]

Where the fuck did September go? Need to get grades ready for first term interim reports for next week .. well, if the rest of the school year goes this fast it will be summer again before i know it.

You're just trying to rush through to January

Watching a cake challenge on Food Network and am crying when the one cake artist's husband smashes her cake .... you could see his love and care and protectiveness when he did it (the wife was collapsing under stress of life in general and the cake challenge was just too much on her) ... I spent most of my life wanting someone to love me like that ... giddy and happy that I have it now.

I'd smash your cake, if you know what I mean

 

[Lilac_Sky]

...see I've spent most of my life making sure I don't have someone like that.

Make a stand if you need to...but don't you dare, DARE, ruin my work for me or interfere with what I'm working towards, I don't care how stressed it is making me. In my opinion, it's a gesture of total disrespect towards me, my dreams, and my effort. Get in a yelling match with me, drag me into counselling, try to convince me to change my mind about what I'm doing...but don't you TOUCH what I'm doing. God can you imagine working so hard on something like a cake and then having someone destroy it? It'd drive me to murder.

It's a good thing Michelangelo didn't have a man like that. We'd ever have the Sistine Chapel.

btw, I'm TOTALLY not ragging on what you want in life If you want someone who will force you to keep from driving yourself bonkers, there is absolutely nothing bad about that. It'd just piss me off to hell and high water I'm just sharing. Sharing is caring

And I agree with this entirely. But that isn't at all the vibe of what happened. The cake artist began the cake. She commented about how overwhelmed she was with life (just had a baby, opened a huge new business). But she wanted to do the challenge because her daughter liked Lion King. Her husband was her assistant.

The cake artist "disappeared" and he went to look for her and found her outside crying and saying she just wanted to go home. He said he'd go in and continue working (so they wouldn't lose time on the cake) while she took a few minutes to think over what she wanted to do.

Eventually she came inside to continue working on the cake. Finally, the cake artist curled up into a ball on the floor, sobbing about how she didn't want to continue and she just wanted to go home. He tried to console her, get her to continue working, ask her what she wanted to do. She kept saying she wanted to go home but wouldn't move from the spot where she was curled up.

Finally, he said, "Ok, if that is what you want to do." And he picked up the cake in progress and threw it to the floor and said something along the lines of "take that cake. Don't you make my wife cry."

His complete support of her is what makes me cry. He didn't decide "This is too much for her, I'm pulling the plug." He supported her in her decisions, even when everyone else was thinking "You've come all this way to do this challenge, are you crazy to quit?" In my mind, he was very much respecting her, not "disrespecting her or her wishes."

I certainly understand that you could see it differently, but after leaving a 15 year marriage with an emotionally abusive, domineering husband who controlled every move I made, the relationship between the cake artist and her husband was very much the type of loving, respectful, caring relationship I want.

 

[bhndblueyes88]

BTW, I'm totally not stalking you, however much it might look like it today, LOL.

It's alright if you stalk me just a little 0:}

And I agree with this entirely. But that isn't at all the vibe of what happened. The cake artist began the cake. .....
Finally, he said, "Ok, if that is what you want to do." And he picked up the cake in progress and threw it to the floor and said something along the lines of "take that cake. Don't you make my wife cry."

Ahhhh. Mk that sounds like a much better situation. I can see what you mean.

 

[Daddy2mylilgirl]

Right now I'm gearing up to have to argue with my roommate to grow some balls and deal with tough temperatures. Our power bill is strangely high (140 for a 2br with low use of AC), and I want us to cut down to using as little AC/heat as possible. Which is rough in the midwest but, whatever, space heater. She looked at me like I had grown horns.

If you split the rent or bills 50/50 then you don't have anymore a say in how much AC/heat she uses as she would in how little you want it used.

Instead of arguing come to a compromise where she pays more into the electric bill if she wants to use more AC/heat. She has every right to use the AC/heat as much as she wants, but needs to pay accordingly if you are splitting the bil.

Now if you're paying more into the rent than her or are paying the whole electric bill then you have the final say.

 

[the captians wench]

I'm going to like this doctor.

She really didn't do much for me other than perscribe some tests and tell me that she will refure me to any specialist I'd like to see, but she seemed to really listen to me. And I felt comfortable telling her what I felt was wrong and what I wanted done about it.

Now to find a good day for blood work, a place to do it, and call back with the info so I can see the specialist I want.