UK Personals Chat

[big salami]

you perv!!

Poetic, is your bi-curiosity (admit it, come to terms with it, post it!) connected in any way with your interest in toys? A virtual nation needs to know. And I still can't access fuckmachines, can you post us a pic, just to give us all a general idea of course?

but just for scientific research, poetic, go on then!! lol


The Big Salami has spoken! and is waiting to see a fuck machine!
===================

 

[Southsider]

"perv"!? Aw, BS, thanks mate. I feel accepted now, a legit member now I've this seal of approval.

 

[big salami]

well, we do like newbies to feel at home!

"perv"!? Aw, BS, thanks mate. I feel accepted now, a legit member now I've this seal of approval.

haw, haw, haw, ok Ssider no probs, welcome to our little fantasy world! no good trying to break out now though, there is no reality anymore, just Lit!!


The Big Salami has spoken! and is trying to get a cyber job!
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[UKPoeticDreamer]

Curious....

Southsider, Salami et all

Erm okay shoot me I got the URL wrong:


Here it is

Sorry...

I don't know if it is curious... just kinda ponderous. I have never really been excited by women. Nakedness as a whole is a cool thing. *laugh* And all that happens as a bi-product of that state. I would imagine being involved in a few mmf threesomes I have always wondered how adept other women are at pleasuring men. *smile* Kinda like to watch that... maybe compare recipies, hints and tips. Now there is a new take on the bake sale if I ever heard one. But I have also thought of renting a prostitute for a few hours for style tips as well. Strange but true.

I put the K in Kinky most of the time and the rest of the time I am just obsessed.


D

 

[big salami]

Re: Curious....

Southsider, Salami et all

Erm okay shoot me I got the URL wrong:


Here it is

Sorry...

I don't know if it is curious... just kinda ponderous. I have never really been excited by women. Nakedness as a whole is a cool thing. *laugh* And all that happens as a bi-product of that state. I would imagine being involved in a few mmf threesomes I have always wondered how adept other women are at pleasuring men. *smile* Kinda like to watch that... maybe compare recipies, hints and tips. Now there is a new take on the bake sale if I ever heard one. But I have also thought of renting a prostitute for a few hours for style tips as well. Strange but true.



now then PD, no need for that, just get yourself up here and spruce down here and, we can all explore and experiment together!! in the name of science of course!! lmffao!


and that link!! where?? you are a putz baby!! lol



The Big Salami has spoken! and is looking forward to a scientific
=================== experiment!!




I put the K in Kinky most of the time and the rest of the time I am just obsessed.


D

 

[sprucett_78]

the heat !

Well, it has livened up in here, i can feel the heat already from possible friction burns ! lol

Hi salami, still pondering yr offer babe, lots to weigh up before i bend over and accept my fate....

Poetic....toys ! jesus I bust my fave one last night will have to go into research for a new model, think they let u test drive them?

Southsider...welcome u perv I havent really taslked with you yet hun but i'm sure it will b an experience.....

For now though, back to bed.......cough, sniffle, shiver.....

C ya xxxx

 

[UKPoeticDreamer]

Toys...

Spruce....

I can recommend a few...

*GRIN* Take an easyjet flight to Amsterdamn and the choices are HUGE. Or let the fingers do the walking on the internet.

*smile* And down to those recommendations:

Vibrators -

Pocket Rocket - Tiny Vibe made in California... great for popping in the purse and you can use it anywhere... God those lunch breaks go faster when you are flushed with a good orgasm.

Omax- English Vibe pretty good a bit big and ungainly but it is a fully rechargeable model *smile* The attachements are crap though.

Eroscillator - German one supposed to be the best in the world after the famous Hitachi Magic Wand which we cannot get over here. Recommended by Dr Ruth... (american Sexologist) supposed to help with orgasmic dysfunction. (Does that mean I can't have more than 10 in a row?)

There are so many more out there.... dildos depends on the woman really... Size shape colour texture.... If you are into g spot orgasms there are cool bendy vibes that pulse. (One of these days I am gonna have to get a road map)

Anyway I am always up for discussion on sex toys... *smile* and the more men that realise that sex toys are not a threat but an addition to sex the happier I will be. *smile* I like a good dick and a good vibe these things are not mutually exclusive.


D

 

[sprucett_78]

Expert ! do u do this for a living? u should....I'll have a look and then we can discuss, i do like my g spot orgasms, in fact i like the whole orgasm thing.

nice grinding till u cum......

 

[Southsider]

PD - yer knows yer shit indeed. And here's a nod of acknowledgement to the 'it's an addition' tip cos you is so right there my girl. Here's a funny tale - my last girlfriend bought two while I was going out with her, one was a biggish fella and one was smaller but I'm damned if I can remember what they were called (Ben & Jerry, Smith & Western, Posh n Becks). The bigger one was purple!!? Anyhew, they were a lot of fun, in an additional kinda way. I guess there's dildos for single fun and dildos for when there's more than one.

I don't know whether it's a London thing but what with Soho being a bit cleaner round the edges and all that big city annonimity it ain't such a big deal heading down the ol' sex shop after a couple of bevvies on a Friday night with yer fav girl and saucy thoughts to share. We still paid in cash mind.

Thanks indeed for the correct link, I can breathe easier now (or will that be slightly faster in a minute). I didn't get further than the home page and the 350rpm reference - classic!.

Don't worry PD, no-one's accusing you of anything too hardcore, we all let the mouse do the wandering around the worldwide superhighway and ~ahem~ stumble on some seductive depravity. Ain't the internet great like that?

Spruce - Thanks for the welcome. Nice indeed to see there's another girlie to keep PD company out there who's up for chats. I'm bastard bored at the moment as well. And you're simglle; simble; shmingle; investing in battery-powered, how interesting!

 

[sprucett_78]

Only problem wioth battery powered toys though is the cost ! i am an addicted girl what can I say.....mains I would probably make myself numb !

So how are u then southsider, nice to c yr name on the threads lately, welcome and have fun......

We are hoping for a meet from this threwad let us know what u think

 

[Southsider]

"mains"!? What are you like!?...............well, knackered I guess. And smiling. And sweating. OK, I'm calm, I'm calm. So what is your recommendation for PD?

Meet - dunno, sell it to me babe.

 

[big blue eyes]

Hi there folks,
another male.Any gals out there from the highlands
would love to here from you.
p.s. into anything apart from golden showers.

 

[big salami]

you'll have to give more than that jock!

Hi there folks,
another male.Any gals out there from the highlands
would love to here from you.
p.s. into anything apart from golden showers.

hahaha, welcome bbe, but the girls on here aredefinitely spoilt for choice so, you'll need to sell yoiurself a bit, nothing to heavy mind, age, build,occupation and annual salary figures will help 'em decide! lol have fun mate!


The Big Salami has spoken! and done his good deed early today
===================

 

[sprucett_78]

Varied menu

You are all wonderful, and all very tasty

You will all have to tell us a lot more though about yrselves.....as for toys south, anything with a buzz is nice lol although a good dildo with suction cup works its magic when u need it too aswell........oh i could just do with a good.........

God i love it here on lit..i can say just what I want....its like the perfect partner, except better hehehehe


We need mmore women for u guys though, you should all go out recruiting. Then we can organise a meeting for everyone, then again i diont mind, sure PD wont either if its just me her and ALL of u guys...what a varied night that would b !

At least the conversation would never b boring....

 

[big salami]

Re: Varied menu

You are all wonderful, and all very tasty

You will all have to tell us a lot more though about yrselves.....as for toys south, anything with a buzz is nice lol although a good dildo with suction cup works its magic when u need it too aswell........oh i could just do with a good.........

God i love it here on lit..i can say just what I want....its like the perfect partner, except better hehehehe


We need mmore women for u guys though, you should all go out recruiting. Then we can organise a meeting for everyone, then again i diont mind, sure PD wont either if its just me her and ALL of u guys...what a varied night that would b !

At least the conversation would never b boring....

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
don't know so much about that spruce, the way things are at the moment probably the only conversation you'd hear would go something like this:"come on, move over, it's my turn!" "shut up!" *puff, puff* "i'm cummin' in a minnit!" "well bloody hurry up, it's my turn! i've done nothin' but wank up to now!"

well, if all it takes spruce is to let you say anything you want i will reiterate my earlier invitation! cum on down baby, say whatever you like here and get shagged rigid in the meantime!


The Big Salami has spoken! and remains hopeful!!
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[Brolli]

Yes i'm bavk, well i'm back, YEAH i'M BACK IN BLAAACK

Well, back form my holidays, and what do I find?
The threrad that I posted on with only 4 posts as exoploded into THIS?!
And what's better is... WOMEN!!
Sorry, i'm just a little geordie pervert with a big... **ahem** anyway.
So... any of you ladies like geordies? Awww, c'mon. You GOTTA like us, because were so funny, and cute, and well hung. Did I say well hung? I meant we're good drinkers.
No, honsestly i did!
Wanna get in touch? email: Quionvarreck@aol.com

 

[Southsider]

Looks to me like Spruce and Poetic are out-competing all us fellas in terms of 'proficiency at onanism'. "suction cup dildo" - hehe, you need a hybrid version for the office chair, surely.

 

[sprucett_78]

Boo !

 

[UKPoeticDreamer]

*perk* Well hung....

OOOOO how well hung? But from experience it is better to have a man gifted with a silver toungue.... MMMMMM.


Though if anyone wants to see my favourite site on the web.... Full of very "big" boys indeed have a look at gunners world. I will not paste the url as you can look it up. *giggle* Let's just put it this way... not being able to walk after would be the only reason I would not pursue these boys.

As my gifted Spruce stated... we are not spolit for choice tis just spoilt for time.

On the sex toys subject I can strongly recommend the pocket rocket tis a constant companion. Even at 27 orgasms 2wice or 3 times a day would not go awry. Now if I could only figure out how to cum without screaming....


Ponders a leather gag... now I am getting kinky.

*smile* We should all be naked more often....

D

 

[Southsider]

Poetic! So rude, so naughty, so bad, so how come you're not biting into that leather gag now? I am lovin the fact that you don't forget to bring in a regular dose of eroticism to this thread. But how to make us boys catch up on the orgasm stakes? How many a day? I think seven's pushing it a bit, even for a healthy slip of a chap like me. Then again I do like a challenge. Sounds to me like yoou've quite a healthy arsenal of weaponry at your disposal, what you could you apply/a-fix to the discerning yet sordidly-minded man-about-town to keep him rigidly interested for a 12 hour stretch? Tease me. No please, tease me. Don't make me beg.....oh all right then.

 

[sprucett_78]

Sounds like a challenge to me PD ! , what do u have in yr collection that would do the trick.....12 hours ? Can we be sued for soemthinglike that in the UK? One hell of a way to find out though isnt it....

As for yr suggestions PD, cheers hun, am gonna do some hunting tomorrow when I get chance....I can feel myself leaning towards a couple of new toys I think for the variety loving section of my life

As for orgasms, I've been thinking, how can you improve a mans orgasm? Always open to advice and tips...any hints guys? let us know yr thoughts....when does it feel best?

Seems we are both a little noisy PD when it comes to our vocals in the throws of enjoying ourselves, although I am managing the art of a silent thrill !

 

[UKPoeticDreamer]

Take the Blue Pill....

Hmmm Spruce and Southsider....

12 hours, God I will never forget that Paris, 2000. I literally could not function for a week afterwards. Talk about bruises all over. I think my clitoris went into hiding for months after that. *smile*

Sued for sex in the Uk? Erm I heard the english had a stiff upper lip but I am pretty sure there is no law against "extended foreplay". ;-)

Hmmm how to improve a man's orgasm... that depends on the man. If a man is comfortable with *blush* ass-play or arse-play depending on your nationality. The prostate is a lovely thing to discover in the midst of a wonderful oral session. I also recommend anal beads for the same reason. *smile* But honestly.... hours and hours of teasing makes it great for anyone well at least in my experience.

But would love to know what our boys think?

Cum on guys tell us how to pleasure you better. Spruce and I are always willing pupils.

<--- gets out pen paper and diagrams for assistance.

D

 

[Guest]

Hmmmmmm, Poetic, not only do you know your prose you do know your men. Sounds like you've had the sort of learning experiences everyone should reach eventually. I'll validate your anal assertion. Tis true. Beads I've never experienced but other toys have produced, ahem, how do I put this, eyebrow-raisingly energetic gladular activity. Maybe we should get together with Spruce and you could conduct experiments on me!

"Stiff upper lip" - I like to think that this is more a matter of being coy and suggestive. Intelligent English men prefer to slowly build the mood with some searching exchanges rather than blustering in there with a loud statement that tells you everything in the first 5 seconds. Sweet (and dark) seduction is our preference.

 

[Southsider]

That last post was me. I've technical issues that de-register me if I take too long to write my post. That'll learn me.

 

[UKPoeticDreamer]

My men?

Southsider-
My men, now there is a concept. *laugh* They are not normally mine. I borrow them from wives and girlfriends and left hands normally. Just enough to taste and tease and desire... then let them back into the arms of the ones they love... saited and at peace. Have a look at my poem She Walks that explains it all.

And you and Salami are incorrigible always out for a threesome. *smile* I am not sure Spruce and I would be happy with only one you... there would have to be three or four or five. *wink* But again I am speaking about Spruce in the 1st party again. I am sure she has her own opinons.

And on seduction that is my speciality.... *grin* Scorpios are good at passion and seduction. I am fueled by desire...

<--- BP to your passion needs

D