Way to a man's heart is...

[LadyJeanne]

The quickest way to a man's heart is through his breastplate.

Failing that: amazing bj's and amazing sex. Usually works.

Lou

P.S. Spank me, hon?

With you all bent over like that, how can I resist?

 

[Guest]

With you all bent over like that, how can I resist?

Hahaha! Feel free to take me up on it.

 

[LadyJeanne]

I need to vote for options 2, 3 and 4.

Lime. the greedy bastard

Greedy bastards make the best bastards. As long as they're greedy for me. Otherwise, I'll have to resort to the sharp object between the ribs thing.

 

[LadyJeanne]

Hahaha! Feel free to take me up on it.

Will I have to get in line?

 

[Guest]

Will I have to get in line?

Focus Jeanne, focus. You were asking how to get a man.

And in the worse case scenario, I don't recommend the pistol. Too hard to aim with one hand, short range, no stopping power.

A shotgun is better. Hard to miss with one, and hard to get good forensics off a thousand pellets then one large bullet.

Not sure how I know that.

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

Will I have to get in line?

Well, put it this way: the queue consists of one man, and one man only.

But, open to suggestions.

Lou

 

[LadyJeanne]

Focus Jeanne, focus. You were asking how to get a man.

And in the worse case scenario, I don't recommend the pistol. Too hard to aim with one hand, short range, no stopping power.

A shotgun is better. Hard to miss with one, and hard to get good forensics off a thousand pellets then one large bullet.

Not sure how I know that.

And here I thought this would turn into another food thread, but no, I've stumbled upon the latest issue of Guns & Ammo instead.

(it's HARD to focus with Lou's AV around)

 

[LadyJeanne]

Nothing personal Jeanne, but I'm greedy for my mrs.

awww, that's so sweet - she must feed you well!

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

Well, failing Guns and Neuroses. . . .


I'm not certain about his heart,

But let me wear my lucky g-string,

And I can get under most men's skin

 

[goro goro]

A small point here. Unless you can wield a very heavy blade, it isn't recommended you go through the ribs. Too likely to bounce off or be deflected.

Go under the ribs just above the stomach. Then give the blade a little twitch so you get the lungs as well.

This whole ribcage business reminds me of the classic adrenaline syringe scene in Pulp Fiction.

And not being able to cook should be no problem with modern men who usually can't even eat right.

I can do both, by the way.

 

[doormouse]

Sweets, the way to a man's heart is through his ribcage.

Perferably with something strong and sharp or the bones and muscles get in the way.

A butcher's knife is good

 

[doormouse]

This is what I recomend for a MANHUNT.

http://www.simpsonltd.com/Showroom/DanWesson/C3873/Dan%20Wesson%20set%201.jpg

Looks similar to my divorce kit

 

[LadyJeanne]

And not being able to cook should be no problem with modern men who usually can't even eat right.

Never met a man who had any trouble eating right. Just lucky that way, I guess.




Ooops, wait. You meant nutrition? My bad.

 

[Guest]

Through the sternum.

 

[LadyJeanne]

I have a man's heart. Not quite sure how I got it, but I really don't want it. Any takers?

Are you re-gifting already?

 

[cantdog]

Mine cooks nearly as well as I do, but it was not always that way. It was her personality. And her pussy and stuff, you know, but mostly like, yeah, her personality. I mean, nearly all of 'em have a pussy, but the brains and heart make all the difference. I can cook rings around most of them, anyway.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Sweets, the way to a man's heart is through his ribcage.

Perferably with something strong and sharp or the bones and muscles get in the way.

That's why I love you.

 

[shereads]

Heart? We're supposed to go for the heart?

It's not fair to keep changing the rules like this.

 

[LadyJeanne]

Heart? We're supposed to go for the heart?

It's not fair to keep changing the rules like this.

But you get your choice of weapons.

 

[dreampilot79]

Heart? We're supposed to go for the heart?

It's not fair to keep changing the rules like this.

What the well dressed man wears around here... a kelvar jacket and keeps his... errrrummmm tucked firmly between his legs!!!!

Damn you girls are skeerin me!!!

 

[LadyJeanne]

What the well dressed man wears around here... a kelvar jacket and keeps his... errrrummmm tucked firmly between his legs!!!!

Damn you girls are skeerin me!!!

Sugar and spice and everything nice...not so much, no!

But we might melt in your mouth anyway.

 

[dreampilot79]

Sugar and spice and everything nice...not so much, no!

But we might melt in your mouth anyway.

hmmmm... you melt in my mouth and I'll just melt period... how could a feller get that lucky?

 

[lucky-E-leven]

In my experience, the stomach couldn't care less. (And I'm a damn fine cook!)

*le sigh*

Early years spent in the military taught him how to inhale food rather than simply chew, taste and enjoy. No, what got this man excited and willing to bend over backwards for me was my ability to organize, alphabetize, categorize, align, clean microscopic areas of the home, read his mind, deal with his family and be ready to drop everything and come pick him up when he flattened both of his bicycle tires on a 4 plus hour ride.

Food I could have done, no problem.

~lucky

 

[dreampilot79]

In my experience, the stomach couldn't care less. (And I'm a damn fine cook!)

*le sigh*

Early years spent in the military taught him how to inhale food rather than simply chew, taste and enjoy. No, what got this man excited and willing to bend over backwards for me was my ability to organize, alphabetize, categorize, align, clean microscopic areas of the home, read his mind, deal with his family and be ready to drop everything and come pick him up when he flattened both of his bicycle tires on a 4 plus hour ride.

Food I could have done, no problem.

~lucky

Lucky...

Isn't that all in a wife's job description??? ducks and runs like hell!!!