Weirdest erotica you've read?

[TheExperimentalist]

Yeah, that opening is outstanding.

That's what HE said...

 

[Ian_Snow]

I don't necessarily mean the thing that includes the most out there or unrealistic sex acts, though it can include that, I mean stories where the writing is truly bizarre. It also doesn't have to have been on Lit (probably better if not, to be honest.)

For me, it's a story I read probably twenty years ago on some random site about a woman who was getting off on tearing pages out of books and shoving them up herself. There were (not verbatim, but just what I recall) bizarre lines such as "serious works in my pussy, comedy in my ass, that was the rule" and "I carefully opened the page and saw I'd rewritten Joyce with my pussy! It was then I knew I wanted to be a writer."

I still wonder about it sometimes.

ETA: I found it, and it's even weirder than I remembered. She recommends using a pocket dictionary as a tampon (well worn and rolled up, of course), claims to have shoved an entire filing cabinet up there (on a dare), and also starts shoplifting by casually rubbing up against stuff and getting it stuck to her apparently gluelike vaginal fluid (including a sofa, somehow?) I'm not going to link it because I think parts of it violate Lit rules, but if anyone is curious, the search terms pussy ass "rewritten joyce" (with the quotes) is how I found it again. It's actually rather short, but be warned, it's odd.

So, what's the weirdest erotic story you've read?

Holy. Shit. I came in here to say I picked up a Chuck Tingle book for a laugh (I forget which one but they're all crazy), but this... this is next level bananas.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Probably some of the stuff I read back in the Usenet days, pre-lit. Shit was *wild*, and often deeply disturbing. I remember Eli the Bearded had some particularly bizarre stuff.

This isn't actually erotica, but it's not far off the kind of stuff people were posting to a.s.s. and a.s.s.m. back in the day: https://michaelkelly.artofeurope.com/orb2.htm

I do not recall the name of the story, but it was a story from a few years back, published here, about a couple who turn into banana slugs and then are eaten.

I think that was by Hypoxia, something like that?

 

[anthrodisiac]

Some of the stuff on Doc's Lab (TF smut) was downright bonkers. Not "haha fun" bonkers, just deeply strange and unsettling at times. Truly bizarre. Young Anthy contributed a few stories there in the late aughts, but nothing too nuts. Dragon, werewolf, aliens. But the unbirthing, living furniture (no stepladders as far as I'm aware), body fusion (quite a few stories about someone being turned into someone else's penis or clitoris), body splitting, vore fusion, lotta very strange things there.

 

[SimonDoom]

I think that was by Hypoxia, something like that?

Yes! That's the one, thank you. Big Banana, by Hypoxia.

To date, it is the only Literotica story that uses "banana slugs" as a story tag.

 

[anthrodisiac]

Yes! That's the one, thank you. Big Banana, by Hypoxia.

To date, it is the only Literotica story that uses "banana slugs" as a story tag.

I clearly need to get to work, then.

 

[KittyOfSteele]

Holy. Shit. I came in here to say I picked up a Chuck Tingle book for a laugh (I forget which one but they're all crazy), but this... this is next level bananas.

I'm always wondering when is Chuck Tingle going to pound Literotica authors with T-rexes and the physical manifestation of his book covers.

 

[SimonDoom]

I clearly need to get to work, then.

You've got many gastopod names to work with.

 

[anthrodisiac]

You've got many gastopod names to work with.

Plus, hermaphroditic, love darts, face penises. Yeah, I foresee this being, uh, a bit out there.

 

[MK_Whimsy]

living furniture

"No, I spelled it wrong. I didn't mean to type 'futonari'!"

 

[anthrodisiac]

"No, I spelled it wrong. I didn't mean to type 'futonari'!"

"So annoying, I keep trying to text my boyfriend about the new furniture, but my autocorrect keeps changing it to futonari."

Oh no... Futonari is a female futon with a dick... I just found @TheExperimentalist's sequel.

 

[anthrodisiac]

I'm always wondering when is Chuck Tingle going to pound Literotica authors with T-rexes and the physical manifestation of his book covers.

I might be writing some dino smut in the near future. My tell-all memoir Diary of a Clutch Slut is pretty high on my list of backburners at the moment.

 

[MK_Whimsy]

Scold's Bridle is one I happened across by chance, that is both weird and apparently highly-rated. Dark content though!

 

[AStrangeDesire]

"So annoying, I keep trying to text my boyfriend about the new furniture, but my autocorrect keeps changing it to futonari."

Oh no... Futonari is a female futon with a dick... I just found @TheExperimentalist's sequel.

Wait, do you think the stepladder will run away with the futonari?!?

Wonder how the LW masses will receive it...

 

[anthrodisiac]

Wait, do you think the stepladder will run away with the futonari?!?

Wonder how the LW masses will receive it...

And the futonari leaves her cuckcase husband? Or does the stepladder have to compete with a tabull?

All part of the FCU (Furniture Cinematic Universe).

 

[AStrangeDesire]

And the futonari leaves her cuckcase husband? Or does the stepladder have to compete with a tabull?

All part of the FCU (Furniture Cinematic Universe).

The FCU is all fun and games, until someone pulls the rug out from under you!

 

[TheExperimentalist]

living furniture (no stepladders as far as I'm aware)

A shame, really.

 

[TheExperimentalist]

"So annoying, I keep trying to text my boyfriend about the new furniture, but my autocorrect keeps changing it to futonari."

Oh no... Futonari is a female futon with a dick... I just found @TheExperimentalist's sequel.

Not me. I'm OUT.

 

[nice90sguy]

"Weird" fetishes don't necessarilly make weird stories.

It takes a lot to weird me out, I've spent most of my life reading and writing "weird" -- and it's only happened to me once with a story on this site, and I posted about that story before. It was a balloon fetish story (which to me is a slightly weird thing), but was also stylistically and narratively extremely odd.

I don't find Ms Bonkers weird, or even very original -- but it's a brilliant story, a must-read, sexy, funny and immersive.

And "Teddy Bear" is another great story, one of my favourite of SimonDoom's, but again -- not weird for me. (The movie "Ted" kind of covered the idea).

Truly "weird" stories need to have an element of dream-logic for me, and very few stories here have that element.

I wrote a stream of consciousness story here which I would rate as the weirdest story I've written. I wrote it during the night shortly after waking from a long, detailed dream. I pulled it from this site (along with a number of other more-or-less self-indulgent fantasies). It was called "Inner Theatre" and can be found on the wayback machine.

My financial domination stories are all niche (findom is WTF for a lot of people), but not really "weird" -- they're "normal" stories pandering to an "odd" kink.

Paradoxically, you have to be a very good writer to pull off weirdness.

If I had to pick my all-time favourite weird story, it would be Salinger's "The Laughing Man" - Any aspiring author needs to read it. It wraps its weirdness as reported narrative - a story about a story. This is what Lewis Carrol did in "Through The Looking Glass": It was a story about a dream (and what I did in "Inner Theatre").

 

[anthrodisiac]

Not me. I'm OUT.

I wish I could be The FCU is now multiplying like nuts inside my braincase. I might as well change my name to Furniturdisiac at this point. I'm something like 6 characters deep in the span of a few hours.

 

[TheExperimentalist]

Wait, do you think the stepladder will run away with the futonari?!?

Wonder how the LW masses will receive it...

And the futonari leaves her cuckcase husband? Or does the stepladder have to compete with a tabull?

All part of the FCU (Furniture Cinematic Universe).

The FCU is all fun and games, until someone pulls the rug out from under you!

Holy fuck, what is even happening here?

This reminds me of a site an old roommate showed me, called 'furniture porn'. It was back in my 'sexuality is sinful and wrong' days, so I was reluctant, but they said "no, trust me," and it was literally just pictures of stuff like easy chairs stacked upside down on each other, phone receivers on each other's bases, tables with two legs up on another table, etc. Just hilarious, not erotic at all (though I suppose some very particular fetishists might have found it so, hey, I don't judge!)

 

[anthrodisiac]

Holy fuck, what is even happening here?

It gets much worse in Plot Bunny Pens... It's just me spiral staircasing into madness.

 

[TheExperimentalist]

It gets much worse in Plot Bunny Pens... It's just me spiral staircasing into madness.

Yeah, just caught up there. I'm... horrified.

 

[anthrodisiac]

Yeah, just caught up there. I'm... horrified.

Which is really the only healthy response to what I hath wrought.

 

[TheExperimentalist]

Which is really the only healthy response to what I hath wrought.

The problem is knowing that I was the catalyst for this. Were it not for me, this would not have happened. I'm responsible.