You're a burglar...

[MisterAlice]

Maybe, but I’m stealing the coffee and replacing it all with decaf

Death penalty for you!

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Replace all your surreality with bland normality! Hah! Take that!

 

[EctoJohn]

Your ice cubes are are all mine!

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Specks of fresh ground garlic mysteeeeriously find their way into every open beverage.

You’re welcome!

 

[Hypnobitch01]

Their favourite fork

 

[ImpishSeraph]

The coffee filters

 

[Qky75]

I'm taking all but the last 2 sheets of toilet paper.

 

[Trubbycat]

The favorite burner off the stove.

 

[UsuallyPresent]

The roller outta the toilet paper holder’s missing. First time someone touches it, the remaining roll will fall and roll away…

 

[Kitty_so_frisky]

All but 1 teaspoonb and the light bulb in the fridge

Stealing your heart, and inadvertently stealing your half of the blankets in my sleep

The left sleeve from every shirt

*Manipulates Spring 2025 trend forecasts to make left-sleeveless tops a thing*

 

[EctoJohn]

I have stolen a handful of rocks from your goldfish tank. Their beauty is mine!

 

[summer_reine]

The handle from all your coffee mugs

 

[Apisto42]

All your cheese.

 

[EctoJohn]

I have stolen your most recent idea straight from my mind!

 

[Kitty_so_frisky]

I have stolen your most recent idea straight from my mind!

True villain material

 

[Kitty_so_frisky]

All the dish soap and dishwasher detergent tablets

 

[IelleDan]

The phone charger

 

[summer_reine]

All the dish soap and dishwasher detergent tablets

I have to use a bar of soap now

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Every even item, but no odd ones

 

[EctoJohn]

I have stolen all the frames of your family photographs (without the photographs).

 

[UsuallyPresent]

I’ve put deepfake porn ai remakes of your family photos on top of your real family photos… it’ll be fun to see how long it takes you to notice

 

[bobb_sledd]

The knob for the largest burner on their stove.

 

[thetiesthatbindme]

Your Sim card

 

[EctoJohn]

I took your extension cords!

 

[Masters_slutpussy]

Has anyone ever left anything? I'm leaving a cat.
Every so often I'll break into the same house and leave another cat.