a companion to 30 in 30

[Sara Crewe]

You can sit at the head of the table.

And choose the main course... did Pico say he had a beak?

bijou

I hate to be a fussy dinner guest but I am not eating Pico's beak. I mean, I'm sure it's a nice beak but it's kinda a rule with me.

 

[Sara Crewe]

Hey Rain Man — what's happened to you? I've been looking forward to your recent installments and suddenly you aren't there anymore. You had a great run there!

Rainman has run into computer issues. He'll be back soon.

 

[wildsweetone]

WSO wrote:


pull the plug
slip the drug
into a pocket
finger in socket
zap of 'lectricity

zing! bad hair day
but it's not May
once in a while
a ridiculous smile
Mona would grimace

Bart would belch
feet all squelch
in mud up to knees
watch out for those nasty killer bees
once in a while

slip in the drugs
stick it in a socket
but not in a pocket
pull the plug.
and promise you won't sing

like Borat in Texas.


Ummmmmmm ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… ::lost for words::

and

And wanted to say: Brilliantly sizzling! The entire poem pops through my mouth as I read it aloud (there are just some plays of words that beg to be read aloud, this was one).

lose some, win some.

thanks manipulatrix but it really is just rubbish. for me it is anyway. but it's fun just to let rip and see what falls off the end of the fingertips from time to time.

 

[manipulatrix]

.....

 

[wildsweetone]

I liked it. Poppy and jazzy and silly. And I dug it... sorry.

never be sorry for liking something.

it's a fun thing to try. just letting those cogs and screws loose that hold the brain in place and letting them fly all over the place.

i said it was rubbish basically because it isn't where i want to go with my poetry writing - it was just a sidetrack for me. free and easy and poppy and jazzy

give it a go, if you like reading it, you'll LOVE writing it.

 

[Tathagata]

manipulatrix

Post-coital figures clash against
each other, mortal stone again,

fall apart to keep from shattering
against the others' harsh edges.

That's a nice little bit of writing.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

I hate to be a fussy dinner guest but I am not eating Pico's beak. I mean, I'm sure it's a nice beak but it's kinda a rule with me.

No no darling, you mistake me. I was merely concerned about whether we needed to have a seeds-and-suet course, or whether Pico was the type for whom we need to procure dead mice. It's all in the beak, you know.

Really. We WON'T eat him. I know I said I would, but I was just kidding. Honest.

And back on topic, there's been some damn fine writing in here the past few days. I kept drafting a note that tried to mention some of the lines and I kept having entirely too many references. Everybody in here has done something really wonderful somewhere in the past couple of pages. Manipulatrix, you really catch some bang-on phrases quite regularly. RainMan's not here, but I hope he catches up, cause he's been solid too.

Vampiredust, #13 is darn fine. Eluard's bein' all yummy and abstract, Tzara's like watching Minnesota Fats play in an amateur bar league, (Nigirizushi just tripped my trigger) and I liked wildsweetone's “to jam my tongue/ between the rocks” I dunno, I just really like that. And I liked 4degree's “the diabolical urge to/ touch something beautiful." And the turtles. The turtles are great. They're kickin' my ass, the turtles.

It's late. And I don't have my entry for tomorrow yet.

woof,
bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

No no darling, you mistake me. I was merely concerned about whether we needed to have a seeds-and-suet course, or whether Pico was the type for whom we need to procure dead mice. It's all in the beak, you know.

Really. We WON'T eat him. I know I said I would, but I was just kidding. Honest.

And back on topic, there's been some damn fine writing in here the past few days. I kept drafting a note that tried to mention some of the lines and I kept having entirely too many references. Everybody in here has done something really wonderful somewhere in the past couple of pages. Manipulatrix, you really catch some bang-on phrases quite regularly. RainMan's not here, but I hope he catches up, cause he's been solid too.

Vampiredust, #13 is darn fine. Eluard's bein' all yummy and abstract, Tzara's like watching Minnesota Fats play in an amateur bar league, (Nigirizushi just tripped my trigger) and I liked wildsweetone's “to jam my tongue/ between the rocks” I dunno, I just really like that. And I liked 4degree's “the diabolical urge to/ touch something beautiful." And the turtles. The turtles are great. They're kickin' my ass, the turtles.

It's late. And I don't have my entry for tomorrow yet.

woof,
bijou

I think his mice will have to be alive, unless he is a turkey vulture in disguise. Perhaps there should be two tables at this party. One table where the food is dead and one where it runs free (for the time being).

I really didn't think you would eat him, although I was fairly certain there might be some biting.


I'm sorry about the turtles. Was it Leonardo or Raphael?


I agree—this pool of talented company is a great place to write. Although, I just know that if we were all writing in the same room, I would be the one getting shushed the most or getting smacked for trying to read your screens.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

I think his mice will have to be alive, unless he is a turkey vulture in disguise. Perhaps there should be two tables at this party. One table where the food is dead and one where it runs free (for the time being).

I really didn't think you would eat him, although I was fairly certain there might be some biting.


I'm sorry about the turtles. Was it Leonardo or Raphael?


I agree—this pool of talented company is a great place to write. Although, I just know that if we were all writing in the same room, I would be the one getting shushed the most or getting smacked for trying to read your screens.

So he IS a raptor, then. Well good. I get along better with those anyway. Seed-eaters are so... flighty. I'll check with the concierge about live mice. I'm sure we can get some.

My ass was being kicked in a very GOOD way by your turtles. So no apologies necessary.

I'm having all sorts of ideas about the possibility of us all writing in the same room together. Suffice it to say that they are seriously inappropriate ideas. I really, really don't know how to act properly. People tell me that all the time.

Somehow in this group I suspect I may be more readily forgiven, though.

bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

So he IS a raptor, then. Well good. I get along better with those anyway. Seed-eaters are so... flighty. I'll check with the concierge about live mice. I'm sure we can get some.

My ass was being kicked in a very GOOD way by your turtles. So no apologies necessary.

I'm having all sorts of ideas about the possibility of us all writing in the same room together. Suffice it to say that they are seriously inappropriate ideas. I really, really don't know how to act properly. People tell me that all the time.

Somehow in this group I suspect I may be more readily forgiven, though.

bijou

I think I may have imposed raptor-ness on him but well, he seemed rather raptor like what with the claws and diving and swooping.


I honestly will stop writing about the turtles. I'm in 12 step 'n everything.

I bet ya twenty bucks I would get booted out first or locked in a closet.
Well-behaved, proper people give me the shivers. The bad kind.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

I think I may have imposed raptor-ness on him but well, he seemed rather raptor like what with the claws and diving and swooping.


I honestly will stop writing about the turtles. I'm in 12 step 'n everything.

I bet ya twenty bucks I would get booted out first or locked in a closet.
Well-behaved, proper people give me the shivers. The bad kind.

Let's get locked in the closet together. First, though, they'll have to drag me out from under Tzara's desk.

We love the turtles. The turtles are totally workin' for us. That's the royal we, by the way.

Kingfishers dive and swoop too. Think we need to serve live fish?

Oy, this cultural diversity stuff. It's worse than when I was in academics.

bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

Let's get locked in the closet together. First, though, they'll have to drag me out from under Tzara's desk.

We love the turtles. The turtles are totally workin' for us. That's the royal we, by the way.

Kingfishers dive and swoop too. Think we need to serve live fish?

Oy, this cultural diversity stuff. It's worse than when I was in academics.

bijou

Sounds like a plan. I'll be nearby sittin' on his desk askin' him every five seconds what he's gonna write about today. Says he can't see if I sit on his knee. I think secretly he's trying to tell me I need to lose five pounds. The whole thing is tragic and has seriously damaged my self-esteem.


I think Pico seemed larger than a Kingfisher. But maybe it's a case of little bird casting big shadow.

 

[Sara Crewe]

Tzara,

When I read your poem today my soul felt like it was cradled in the arms of truth. Better luck next time.


Sara

PS Nice hat.

 

[Tathagata]

Bijou 1-12

-untitled-

Wonderful poem
Nice work

 

[unpredictablebijou]

aw shucks.

thanks.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Eluard:

nicely done!

bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

Nice work on 18, Tzara. Clear imagery. Interesting theme/idea.

 

[Tzara]

Nice work on 18, Tzara. Clear imagery. Interesting theme/idea.

Thank you, Ms. Crewe. Your check is in the mail.

Sorry about the exchange rate.

 

[Eluard]

WSO wrote:

The Weight of Winter

The edge of the sky
carries the weight of rain,
great black bruises
that welt the heavens
weighing down the words
I wait for,
words that will tumble
and pelt the sidewalk,
play on the mind
and guide the body
along paths
most often walked.


Very nice, this one — a very suitable 23. Only seven more to go!

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Sara - today's piece was rockin'. It made me say hell yeah right out loud in the shop. Suggestion, if I may: mess with your line division. Try them every which way. Some of your strong phrases could be emphasized even better that way.

And manipulatrix, you're makin' me wave my fist in the air all the way through. But you might hammer on the last two lines - I think they could be even more, let's say, "final". I'd say the beret is excellent but only use it once.

Just my two scents,

you go,
bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

Sara - today's piece was rockin'. It made me say hell yeah right out loud in the shop. Suggestion, if I may: mess with your line division. Try them every which way. Some of your strong phrases could be emphasized even better that way.

And manipulatrix, you're makin' me wave my fist in the air all the way through. But you might hammer on the last two lines - I think they could be even more, let's say, "final". I'd say the beret is excellent but only use it once.

Just my two scents,

you go,
bijou

Thanks, Bijou. I'll cut your comment and paste it under the poem so it's there for editing time. I don't mess around with breaking too much with these (30/30 poems) because fixing breaks requires re-reading pieces again and again. If I read most of these over like that they would be more likely to get deleted than posted.

Suggestions are always welcome and encouraged. Anyone should feel free to say whatever they want about my stuff whenever they want. I always figure comments or suggestions mean that there is something at the core that the reader feels is worth working on and improving. That's a good thing.

 

[Tzara]

Hey, El! I really liked this one. Really liked it. I've read it several times. I want to steal your line "and the dreams that scratch at you." Killer line. It don't happen to be fer sale, do it?

What's happenin' with that picture, though? It's like an abstract Johnny Depp in one of those Pirates movies. Either that or my glasses are covered with Vaseline.

In all straightiness—what is that a picture of?

 

[manipulatrix]

..........

 

[unpredictablebijou]

bijou,

LOL @ late-night-no-edit logic.

baby, that's the only logic there is. Besides drunken logic.

bijou

 

[Eluard]

Hey, El! I really liked this one. Really liked it. I've read it several times. I want to steal your line "and the dreams that scratch at you." Killer line. It don't happen to be fer sale, do it?

Thanks, good to see that someone likes something I've written! And yup, everything can be got for a price! (Hey, Vampire Dust made an entire poem out of my origami image, so theft also works apparently! )

What's happenin' with that picture, though? It's like an abstract Johnny Depp in one of those Pirates movies. Either that or my glasses are covered with Vaseline.

In all straightiness—what is that a picture of?

The picture is a photo of a a rusty piece of metal on a patched up wall, lit by the last rays of the sun (+ a lot of eye of newt and tongue of bat). I'll post the undoctored picture with tomorrow's poem.

Thanks again!