Dating Sucks!

[Loverskitten]

I have deleted my online dating profiles. That didn't go as planned. It really was hard to put myself out there, but oh well, I tried.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

Hugs to you, LK.

Maybe this will bring a smile. Read on a dating profile...

"Please know hookers and don't forget to send a couple pictures if you want a reply."

I bet the responses he must be getting to this are entertaining.

 

[Polecat74]

Sounds great... but as a first message (on a vanilla site)? What the hell kind of vibe am I sending out lately? I have changed nothing in my profile :/

"I am upfront, I am looking for long term. If in long term I want a partner open to mfm threesome though. I am straight and want great 1 on 1 daily but I like now and then to see my parter with another guy and then with her after. No I don’t want other women. Sorry I just want to be honest..."

Haha, he sounds like my dream guy.

(No, seriously ... )

 

[Loverskitten]

Haha, he sounds like my dream guy.

(No, seriously ... )

See, it sounds good to me too. But as a first message? Maybe a third date thing, for crying out loud.

 

[Polecat74]

See, it sounds good to me too. But as a first message? Maybe a third date thing, for crying out loud.

Yeah, I don't know. I never really did the dating thing. I fucked my now-husband THEN learned his last name. Moved in together. THEN started dating.

I'm all about mixing it up.

But if he was a troll, probably the first-message thing would be totally off-putting.

 

[Loverskitten]

Well, after a bit of a break, I've been back on the vanilla sites.

I met a guy I really like but his situation is drama so I'm forcing myself to keep my options open for now.

But with options like these.... (I'm the blue text)

Well I am a weirdo, and I love fucking, but how'd he know?

 

[Loverskitten]

Then there's these anti-cat messages I get. I make it pretty clear that I love kitties in my profile, even wear my ears in one picture.

Guy: "Hello. I grew up with cats. Love them, but I am not going to be a single guy with a cat. haha.
Regards,
(Name removed)"

Me: "Why not?"

Guy: "Ha. Rule #6 in the manly mans playbook. Don't be a single guy with a cat."

Me: "It's a good thing I date guys who don't need a "play book" to tell them how to be a man then."

 

[jewelz_diamondz]

After a day of texting back and forth he called and the first thing he said "Tell, me, no promise me, you are not fucking anyone else." No hello or anything...Just hung up the phone.

 

[Loverskitten]

Attention ladies!!!! 16-20
Too bad I'm too old. Damnit
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...luffy-pink-dressing-gown-bid-young-bride.html


Also, 39 my ass

 

[jewelz_diamondz]

All I can say to that is wow!! 39? Better look again!

 

[Loverskitten]

Don't cha love the guilded EMPTY cabinets in one pic, and also there's a sheet cake in another. WTF?

 

[MeekMe]

Hm... first impressions can sometimes be really bad. Also, I think sometimes the internet gives people the mindset that they can say anything that comes to mind and it's ok. Like the internet makes tact scarce.

I actually have no idea how to date so I really don't know what it's like out there at all. I do know, however, that sometimes people do or say awkward things. Perhaps a second look might help.

 

[QuantumJumping]

Funnier than the humour thread!

OMG!
Laughing with tears rolling dwn my face.
Guffawing!

Yep. Subscribed!

Okay.
This guy chats me up for two weeks. Wants me to commit to being his online slave. I said I don't do that, try the BDSM girls. Then he wants to be my Alpha Male. I agreed to role play that scenario. Next he makes an appt for sexting. I have to get up at 4 a.m. to be online for him. He doesn't show. He appologizes, makes another appt, doesn't show.
I wrote him off, and NO MORE APPOINTMENTS, ever. Don't even ask.

 

[Sebastian_Plz]

I am loving this thread...def need more folks to share their experiences. I am always keen to see how women experience the Lit world versus the men who frequent the site. Great postings, great comments, and engaging reads! Thanks all for sharing!

 

[CutieMouse]

I put a profile on a non-kinky dating site a few weeks ago. I've talked to and had coffee with a couple of interesting people, in the "I could be okay with arm candy duties" sort of way, but... ugh.

And what the hell is up with sending someone an email that said "Hi." and nothing else? Really? I wrote a whole profile thingie. There are plenty of things to use as openers.

But right now my favorite is the "so and so wants to meet you!" bit.

The profile of the last guy who "wanted to meet me" said he loved his pets more than women, and put the following demands on his profile -

Single, with at least one pet or not worth his time
No pot
No alcohol
No smokers
No tattoos
No piercings
No BBW
No more than 2 children
No "religious nuts" like Baptists or Catholics

and MUST NOT BE LOOKING FOR -

Long Term
Other Relationships
Dating
Intimate Encounters
An Activity Partner
Married

Wow.

 

[Loverskitten]

I put a profile on a non-kinky dating site a few weeks ago. I've talked to and had coffee with a couple of interesting people, in the "I could be okay with arm candy duties" sort of way, but... ugh.

And what the hell is up with sending someone an email that said "Hi." and nothing else? Really? I wrote a whole profile thingie. There are plenty of things to use as openers.

But right now my favorite is the "so and so wants to meet you!" bit.

I hate the "meet me" thing too, I just delete those emails and don't even look at those profiles.

However, I don't mind the "hi" messages. I'll take "hi" over a long first message addressing every part if my profile. I feel bad deleting those without a reply sometimes.

 

[Loverskitten]

OH LOOK! a picture of you skydiving!!!! OMG you must be the most interesting guy alive!

....next profile.....
OH LOOK! a picture of you skydiving!!!! OMG you must be the most interesting guy alive!


....next profile.....
OH LOOK! a picture of you skydiving....

 

[Sebastian_Plz]

I hate the "meet me" thing too, I just delete those emails and don't even look at those profiles.

However, I don't mind the "hi" messages. I'll take "hi" over a long first message addressing every part if my profile. I feel bad deleting those without a reply sometimes.

Out of curiosity, why do you not read the longer emails? Granted an overly long email can be off putting, I am curious why a woman (and I speaking in general terms here, not 'you' in particular) would skip over the individual who is generating an email with actual substance. Esp if they take the time to check out points on your profile....what would generate the dismissal?

I am not saying this is the case, but is it fair to assume, that both women and men, are just as superficial in the 'selection' process? That is to say, if a guy/gal has an average pic but a long email, its easy to ignore. Versus an attractive guy/gal, with an engaging read which may not be as long, where you are more compelled to itemize a response. Or is it something else and I am making up my own conspiracy theory? lol

No wrong answer here, I am just curious about online dating and vary approaches women practice while seeking out partners/friends/lovers/etc.

 

[Loverskitten]

Out of curiosity, why do you not read the longer emails? Granted an overly long email can be off putting, I am curious why a woman (and I speaking in general terms here, not 'you' in particular) would skip over the individual who is generating an email with actual substance. Esp if they take the time to check out points on your profile....what would generate the dismissal?

I am not saying this is the case, but is it fair to assume, that both women and men, are just as superficial in the 'selection' process? That is to say, if a guy/gal has an average pic but a long email, its easy to ignore. Versus an attractive guy/gal, with an engaging read which may not be as long, where you are more compelled to itemize a response. Or is it something else and I am making up my own conspiracy theory? lol

No wrong answer here, I am just curious about online dating and vary approaches women practice while seeking out partners/friends/lovers/etc.

I DO read them. I read every message I get, just in case. But if I am not remotely attracted to the guy (and I have a type) I don't respond.

That is when I feel bad. Clearly, they took the time to read my profile and craft a personal first message but if I'm not interested, I just delete.

The absolute worst are the obvious "cut and paste" messages. I have had the same guy send me the same exact message a few times. That is annoying.

I think the best approach is a short but personal message.

 

[Sebastian_Plz]

I DO read them. I read every message I get, just in case. But if I am not remotely attracted to the guy (and I have a type) I don't respond.

That is when I feel bad. Clearly, they took the time to read my profile and craft a personal first message but if I'm not interested, I just delete.

The absolute worst are the obvious "cut and paste" messages. I have had the same guy send me the same exact message a few times. That is annoying.

I think the best approach is a short but personal message.

Thank you for the response, I appreciate it.

Always interesting to see how the other gender experiences things and handles situations. Thanks for the share.

 

[midwestyankee]

Thank you for the response, I appreciate it.

Always interesting to see how the other gender experiences things and handles situations. Thanks for the share.

May I offer a tiny bit of unsolicited advice: do not, under any circumstances, ever use "the other gender" again unless you really do mean to make a broad generalization about all women everywhere under all conditions. Because here, you did not learn how all women experience messages on dating websites. You learned about one woman, who happens to be kind and articulate enough to be describe her own manner of responding to such messages. Likely, if every other woman who posts to this forum moderately often were to answer the same question, every one would have a slightly different answer.

They're individuals, fella. Get used to it.

 

[CarnivalBarker]

I DO read them. I read every message I get, just in case. But if I am not remotely attracted to the guy (and I have a type) I don't respond.

That is when I feel bad. Clearly, they took the time to read my profile and craft a personal first message but if I'm not interested, I just delete.

The absolute worst are the obvious "cut and paste" messages. I have had the same guy send me the same exact message a few times. That is annoying.

I think the best approach is a short but personal message.

This is disappointing, as someone who recently set up an online photo. A simple hi, thanks for the message, and hope you meet someone might be nice. I believe women and men don't get together because women are really horrible about letting themselves be picked up. Be yourself, they say. Do this or that to get my attention, they say. Reality is they will ignore you in person or online, and if they are interested, because of your looks or your car, they will let you know. And they are as picky as guys are. Dating is ridiculous.

 

[BiBunny]

This is disappointing, as someone who recently set up an online photo. A simple hi, thanks for the message, and hope you meet someone might be nice. I believe women and men don't get together because women are really horrible about letting themselves be picked up. Be yourself, they say. Do this or that to get my attention, they say. Reality is they will ignore you in person or online, and if they are interested, because of your looks or your car, they will let you know. And they are as picky as guys are. Dating is ridiculous.

Oh, please.

If you reply to 99% of these asshats--even if it's a polite "No, thank you" or whatever--they either a.) get offended and send you this long, misspelled rant about what a stupid bitch you are, or b.) take the fact that you replied at all as an invitation to keep annoying you.

Ignoring is the simply the best of several shitty options.

 

[Loverskitten]

Oh, please.

If you reply to 99% of these asshats--even if it's a polite "No, thank you" or whatever--they either a.) get offended and send you this long, misspelled rant about what a stupid bitch you are, or b.) take the fact that you replied at all as an invitation to keep annoying you.

Ignoring is the simply the best of several shitty options.

YES YES YES!!!!
I've gotten hate mail after I said "thanks but no thanks" hate mail seriously.
I also have gotten "I know where you work" and etc. it's not easy.

 

[Loverskitten]

Also, let me add the "your car" bit is crap. I ignore any profile that has a car, motorcycle, boat, or money photo. I am not dating those things. Post pictures of yourself