Freakin' good titles!
- Thread starter karmadog
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karmadog
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This morning I was recognized again. Maybe I should 'splain. For the past twenty years, people have remarked that I have an amazing resemblance to a famous actor. Which one? Let's just say that he's somewhere between Tom Cruise and Tom Arnold. Anyhow, I got it again this morning.
This apparent resemblance (which I don't really see, but must be there) has both advantages and drawbacks. The drawbacks are obvious: constant autograph signing, a certain loss of personal identity, teeny bobbers camping in front of my house. But there are also advantages. I almost always look familiar to people even if they can't place why, so it's usually easy to strike up conversations with strangers. Sometimes they even think that I'm related to them until they realize that I look like this actor. People like the actor so I kind of ride his good will coattails.
Anyhow, this morning, a woman slipped me her phone number at the gas station. I'd never seen her before in my life! A couple of days ago, a sixteen or seventeen year old girl slipped her number into my Micky D's bag (she was an employee, I threw hers away. I don't need no kids). Are women getting more brazen? Or were these isolated incidents, I wonder.
gentle fangs, chrome by smithpeter
Ah, the last time I chased a car. I'm still recovering from that.
Gameroom Rhythm Method by beths-virtue
This poem and title reminded me of a story. Years ago, I used to hang out at this bar (shocking, I know) with a pool room. To get into the pool room, you had to walk down four or five steps. One of the waitresses there was a girl that I fooled around with occasionally. She was pretty hot with absolutely magnificent, large breasts. Well anyhow, I was standing at the top of the stairs talking to this girl when a guy came up behind her and grabbed her breasts. To be truthful, I thought she knew him, so I didn't do anything, but she turned around and punched him full on the chin. It was the best punch I ever saw. He actually lifted off his feet and flew down the stairs, out cold before he hit the ground. Man, I loved that girl.
Hopeful Blow By Blow by smithpeter
An old friend of mine used to use this pick up line: "Bet you can't make me come." And it often worked! Of course, when he came he'd say, "You win!" The joke was on him though. He got into a car accident while getting a blow job and, when he came to, he thought that it had been bitten off. The terror of that moment stayed with him, and he never got another blow job again.
Sorry about being so long-winded this morning. I don't know what got into me.
Toodles for now.
This apparent resemblance (which I don't really see, but must be there) has both advantages and drawbacks. The drawbacks are obvious: constant autograph signing, a certain loss of personal identity, teeny bobbers camping in front of my house. But there are also advantages. I almost always look familiar to people even if they can't place why, so it's usually easy to strike up conversations with strangers. Sometimes they even think that I'm related to them until they realize that I look like this actor. People like the actor so I kind of ride his good will coattails.
Anyhow, this morning, a woman slipped me her phone number at the gas station. I'd never seen her before in my life! A couple of days ago, a sixteen or seventeen year old girl slipped her number into my Micky D's bag (she was an employee, I threw hers away. I don't need no kids). Are women getting more brazen? Or were these isolated incidents, I wonder.
gentle fangs, chrome by smithpeter
Ah, the last time I chased a car. I'm still recovering from that.
Gameroom Rhythm Method by beths-virtue
This poem and title reminded me of a story. Years ago, I used to hang out at this bar (shocking, I know) with a pool room. To get into the pool room, you had to walk down four or five steps. One of the waitresses there was a girl that I fooled around with occasionally. She was pretty hot with absolutely magnificent, large breasts. Well anyhow, I was standing at the top of the stairs talking to this girl when a guy came up behind her and grabbed her breasts. To be truthful, I thought she knew him, so I didn't do anything, but she turned around and punched him full on the chin. It was the best punch I ever saw. He actually lifted off his feet and flew down the stairs, out cold before he hit the ground. Man, I loved that girl.
Hopeful Blow By Blow by smithpeter
An old friend of mine used to use this pick up line: "Bet you can't make me come." And it often worked! Of course, when he came he'd say, "You win!" The joke was on him though. He got into a car accident while getting a blow job and, when he came to, he thought that it had been bitten off. The terror of that moment stayed with him, and he never got another blow job again.
Sorry about being so long-winded this morning. I don't know what got into me.
Toodles for now.
_Land
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Re: I almost forgot!
I must be on the shit list because the poems i submiited last night are still pending............. I wanna play pool with you beth.............ok well maybee thats a stretch of the truth........... I just want to have you and the pool table all in the same fantasy.................should i comment about the balls and stick............. I think I will stop before the image and this post get out of hand......... erm or is that in hand <WEG>
karmadog said:
I must be on the shit list because the poems i submiited last night are still pending............. I wanna play pool with you beth.............ok well maybee thats a stretch of the truth........... I just want to have you and the pool table all in the same fantasy.................should i comment about the balls and stick............. I think I will stop before the image and this post get out of hand......... erm or is that in hand <WEG>
beths-virtue
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k dog.. i wonder....
if i thought of truly spectacular titles for my poems ... would i still make the title thread?.. my guess is not, they would end up contrived sounding...
once again , my thanks for mentions to you k dog.
if i thought of truly spectacular titles for my poems ... would i still make the title thread?.. my guess is not, they would end up contrived sounding...
once again , my thanks for mentions to you k dog.
karmadog
Now I'm a drink behind.
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beth, if you mean by 'thought up fantastic titles', making titles with the thought of making the thread, you're right. They probably would sound contrived. The original intent of this thread was to remind poets that the title is really the first line of the poem. If the poem is good, it deserves better than some sappy hallmark title like 'The love of my life' or 'You broke my heart'. I for one usually won't even read poems with those titles. I expect something sophomoric and trite.
If I were you, I wouldn't change a thing about the way I title my poems. Your titles are already excellent.
E-Nymph: nope.
If I were you, I wouldn't change a thing about the way I title my poems. Your titles are already excellent.
E-Nymph: nope.
beths-virtue
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i really didnt think so either k dog... it was just , well idle speculation...
i used to be disparaged for the way i write and talk, and occassionally i act on that
but ,now , since i hang around with foks who know what a dust jacket is to a book... well its declined
i used to be disparaged for the way i write and talk, and occassionally i act on that
but ,now , since i hang around with foks who know what a dust jacket is to a book... well its declined
smithpeter
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dog
thank you very much for mention, again, today.
a question-
have you ever listed a poem title in your thread and not read the poem?
your wit and savvy make your thread the most humorous and very insightful.
thank you very much for mention, again, today.
a question-
have you ever listed a poem title in your thread and not read the poem?
your wit and savvy make your thread the most humorous and very insightful.
G
Guest
Guest
No. But there have been a couple of occasions when I wished I hadn't read the poem.
karmadog
karmadog
karmadog
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I realized something today. My dog hates big band and swing music. I usually play Sinatra or Big Bad Voodoo Daddy or something along those lines before I go out. That kind of music puts me in the mood to be around people, upbeat and ready to laugh. Apparently, my dog now associates it with being left. How sad. Maybe I should teach her to dance.
feeling another tongue by smithpeter
Cows have hair on their tongues. Does that mean they always feel hungover?
Observing Pink Fruit by beths-virtue
This would be a great name for a post-modern porn magazine.
How Could It Have Gone So Right by Harley_Quinn_1999
Said the man after his car hit a telephone pole. Said the voters in Florida. Said Buster Douglas.
Suplimental (sic) Sex Insurance by _Land
Is this what you need if you cheat on your wife? Or is this what you need if you can't find anyone to cheat on your wife with? BTW, I dare you to look at this poem without chuckling.
feeling another tongue by smithpeter
Cows have hair on their tongues. Does that mean they always feel hungover?
Observing Pink Fruit by beths-virtue
This would be a great name for a post-modern porn magazine.
How Could It Have Gone So Right by Harley_Quinn_1999
Said the man after his car hit a telephone pole. Said the voters in Florida. Said Buster Douglas.
Suplimental (sic) Sex Insurance by _Land
Is this what you need if you cheat on your wife? Or is this what you need if you can't find anyone to cheat on your wife with? BTW, I dare you to look at this poem without chuckling.
_Land
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karmadog said:I realized something today. My dog hates big band and swing music. I usually play Sinatra or Big Bad Voodoo Daddy or something along those lines before I go out. That kind of music puts me in the mood to be around people, upbeat and ready to laugh. Apparently, my dog now associates it with being left. How sad. Maybe I should teach her to dance.
I think it would be great for you to teach her to dance, but isnt she a little short for you?
I think ya should just take her with you, she will get you more dates
Thanks for the mention K-dog
hey beth can i do the Watermellon Crawl pleeeeeeeeaaaaase
Great poem harley
peter witha cock like that i dont know how you have so much time on your hands...................
Angeline
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No Dog Dancing!
I used to dance with my dog Shakespeare (he was a great dog, but never did live up to the name). We could dance cheek to cheek (well whatever dogs have on the face that's sorta like a cheek) cause he was tall when I stood him on his hind legs. But he hated it. You know the look your dog gets when he's doing something that he's putting up with cause he loves you, but he really hates what you're making him do? That look.
Or maybe he didn't like Ella Fitzgerald.
I used to dance with my dog Shakespeare (he was a great dog, but never did live up to the name). We could dance cheek to cheek (well whatever dogs have on the face that's sorta like a cheek) cause he was tall when I stood him on his hind legs. But he hated it. You know the look your dog gets when he's doing something that he's putting up with cause he loves you, but he really hates what you're making him do? That look.
Or maybe he didn't like Ella Fitzgerald.
beths-virtue
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Re: No Dog Dancing!
k dig , and angeline, this is too funny, my dog runs whenever i turn the radio on, mainly cause it means i am in a mood to sing offkey , and clean house, and that of course means..... the evil dreaded vacuum..
. my dog is an all blackmutt dog, dubbed with the extremely creative name of "Coal", and yes.. i named him....
i used to own his dad , years ago, his dad was "midnight", which my son thought was a great name for a white dog, he was 6 so, is of course forgiven...
observing pink fruit... hmm. would have to be an all photo mag, nothing sicening and annoying like articles....
on the other hand , i have made some good $$ submitting stories to adult mag publishers, of course its annoying to then see someone elses name on "you" story... but they always insisted on fixing up my then name of "Beth Brown"... that right there was enough reason to divorce him, dont you think ...
so, now here i sit with one ex husband, one future ex- husband, and one possible future husband...
i guess i should think about going by liz for a while .. a la liz taylor
never mind ....
Angeline said:
k dig , and angeline, this is too funny, my dog runs whenever i turn the radio on, mainly cause it means i am in a mood to sing offkey , and clean house, and that of course means..... the evil dreaded vacuum..
. my dog is an all blackmutt dog, dubbed with the extremely creative name of "Coal", and yes.. i named him....
i used to own his dad , years ago, his dad was "midnight", which my son thought was a great name for a white dog, he was 6 so, is of course forgiven...
observing pink fruit... hmm. would have to be an all photo mag, nothing sicening and annoying like articles....
on the other hand , i have made some good $$ submitting stories to adult mag publishers, of course its annoying to then see someone elses name on "you" story... but they always insisted on fixing up my then name of "Beth Brown"... that right there was enough reason to divorce him, dont you think ...
so, now here i sit with one ex husband, one future ex- husband, and one possible future husband...
i guess i should think about going by liz for a while .. a la liz taylor
never mind ....
_Land
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Re: Re: No Dog Dancing!
I imagine you might have a few new stories to tell when you meet your possible future husband...... cant wait to tell them........ermmmmmm read them
beths-virtue said:
k dig , and angeline, this is too funny, my dog runs whenever i turn the radio on, mainly cause it means i am in a mood to sing offkey , and clean house, and that of course means..... the evil dreaded vacuum..
. my dog is an all blackmutt dog, dubbed with the extremely creative name of "Coal", and yes.. i named him....
i used to own his dad , years ago, his dad was "midnight", which my son thought was a great name for a white dog, he was 6 so, is of course forgiven...
observing pink fruit... hmm. would have to be an all photo mag, nothing sicening and annoying like articles....
on the other hand , i have made some good $$ submitting stories to adult mag publishers, of course its annoying to then see someone elses name on "you" story... but they always insisted on fixing up my then name of "Beth Brown"... that right there was enough reason to divorce him, dont you think ...
so, now here i sit with one ex husband, one future ex- husband, and one possible future husband...
i guess i should think about going by liz for a while .. a la liz taylor
never mind ....
I imagine you might have a few new stories to tell when you meet your possible future husband...... cant wait to tell them........ermmmmmm read them
karmadog
Now I'm a drink behind.
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A farewell to titles
At least on a daily basis. I can't take the pressure anymore and I'm getting ready for a trip to Detroit for research. I have to get as much done as possible before I go, so I can narrow down my focus.
Anyhow, I went to the bar last night and I met a girl. I know, I know, you're shocked, shocked that such a thing could happen. Well, believe it or not, I got so shy that my foot got lodged in my mouth. I couldn't even speak. All that came out was stutter... stutter... mumble, mumble... slapstick stumble... er... stutter...
I was so humiliated that I went to the gent's just to collect myself. When I came out, she mentioned that I looked just like xxxxxxxxxx, the actor. I was finally able to speak and we chatted awhile and I got her phone number and came home. But I'll never call her. Why? When I got outside, I discovered that not only had I failed to zip up, I had washbasin blowback all over the front of my khakis. Really, it was just water, but Jesus how humiliating. And what kind of girl gives her phone number to a guy with a wet, open barn door?
Take With Lots Of Alcohol by Unwanted
Could there have been a more appropriate title? Not that I was drunk, I was flustered. She wasn't even that gorgeous. Very cute, but not gorgeous enough to fluster me.
moonglasses by Senna Jawa
When I was young I had Flinstones glasses (actually, they were jelly jars), but these sound much better. I wonder whose moon is on them? Jennifer Love Hewitt's would be a shot glass and Jennifer Lopez's would be a great big pitcher.
a realistic poem by Senna Jawa
Hmm, what a scary thought. Dogme poetry is not a bad idea though. What would the rules be?
1. No reversing of nouns and their modifiers. eg, the grass green.
2. No rhyming.
3. No hyperbole.
4. No words that aren't used in everyday language.
On second thought, it sounds a little dull.
super tire by smithpeter
I'll be seeing the super tire next month. It's like 80 feet tall, by the highway on the way into Detroit. I've never seen the car that it goes to, but I'm sure that someone is designing an SUV that can use it.
At least on a daily basis. I can't take the pressure anymore and I'm getting ready for a trip to Detroit for research. I have to get as much done as possible before I go, so I can narrow down my focus.
Anyhow, I went to the bar last night and I met a girl. I know, I know, you're shocked, shocked that such a thing could happen. Well, believe it or not, I got so shy that my foot got lodged in my mouth. I couldn't even speak. All that came out was stutter... stutter... mumble, mumble... slapstick stumble... er... stutter...
I was so humiliated that I went to the gent's just to collect myself. When I came out, she mentioned that I looked just like xxxxxxxxxx, the actor. I was finally able to speak and we chatted awhile and I got her phone number and came home. But I'll never call her. Why? When I got outside, I discovered that not only had I failed to zip up, I had washbasin blowback all over the front of my khakis. Really, it was just water, but Jesus how humiliating. And what kind of girl gives her phone number to a guy with a wet, open barn door?
Take With Lots Of Alcohol by Unwanted
Could there have been a more appropriate title? Not that I was drunk, I was flustered. She wasn't even that gorgeous. Very cute, but not gorgeous enough to fluster me.
moonglasses by Senna Jawa
When I was young I had Flinstones glasses (actually, they were jelly jars), but these sound much better. I wonder whose moon is on them? Jennifer Love Hewitt's would be a shot glass and Jennifer Lopez's would be a great big pitcher.
a realistic poem by Senna Jawa
Hmm, what a scary thought. Dogme poetry is not a bad idea though. What would the rules be?
1. No reversing of nouns and their modifiers. eg, the grass green.
2. No rhyming.
3. No hyperbole.
4. No words that aren't used in everyday language.
On second thought, it sounds a little dull.
super tire by smithpeter
I'll be seeing the super tire next month. It's like 80 feet tall, by the highway on the way into Detroit. I've never seen the car that it goes to, but I'm sure that someone is designing an SUV that can use it.
Angeline
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Karmadognoy's Complaint
Karmadog said:
When I got outside, I discovered that not only had I failed to zip up, I had washbasin blowback all over the front of my khakis. Really, it was just water, but Jesus how humiliating. And what kind of girl gives her phone number to a guy with a wet, open barn door?
I finally figured out why I feel so simpatico with you. Like me, you're incredibly neurotic.
P.S. Re those realistic poem rules:
If you put an article after the modifier and the verb at the end, you will sound like Yoda (e.g., green the grass is).
Karmadog said:
When I got outside, I discovered that not only had I failed to zip up, I had washbasin blowback all over the front of my khakis. Really, it was just water, but Jesus how humiliating. And what kind of girl gives her phone number to a guy with a wet, open barn door?
I finally figured out why I feel so simpatico with you. Like me, you're incredibly neurotic.
P.S. Re those realistic poem rules:
If you put an article after the modifier and the verb at the end, you will sound like Yoda (e.g., green the grass is).
Last edited:
G
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hehehe
hey k dog... maybe she got a peek at the equipment?
hey k dog... maybe she got a peek at the equipment?
beths-virtue
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hehehe, hey you know, if its too wet to plow, its time to check the equipment...
nevermind, angeline, youre terrible, me , offering me farm entendre..... who on earth , well, never mind, i know who on earth ....
nevermind, angeline, youre terrible, me , offering me farm entendre..... who on earth , well, never mind, i know who on earth ....
beths-virtue
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wow, look at that rooster,i guess it is the size of the comb....
Senna Jawa
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Re: A farewell to titles
These days many have asked you many q-s, so let me ask one too: were you often tempted to select titles because you were able to comment on them in an attractive way (while the attractiveness of the title itself would be something of a secondary consideration)?
Is title the first line of the poem? Title is an important component, when it is there at all. I provide a title less than half of the time. When I do, it may be on occasions a very plain title, if that's what serves the poem the best as I see it at the time. The best known to me poet (one of the best ever) almost never supplies any title. We are talking however about only 20-30 poems max.
Thank you for mentioning.
I hope that you will still do titles once in while. You will have quality time this way.
Best regards, Karma,
It's been for me only three and a half months but I already feel nostalgic about your thread. Bunches of poems were read by others thanks to you, Karmadog.karmadog said:
These days many have asked you many q-s, so let me ask one too: were you often tempted to select titles because you were able to comment on them in an attractive way (while the attractiveness of the title itself would be something of a secondary consideration)?
Is title the first line of the poem? Title is an important component, when it is there at all. I provide a title less than half of the time. When I do, it may be on occasions a very plain title, if that's what serves the poem the best as I see it at the time. The best known to me poet (one of the best ever) almost never supplies any title. We are talking however about only 20-30 poems max.
"Moonglasses" is my metaphor for poetry, for poetic seeing of the world. My grasp of English is poor, as witnessed by Literoticians' outcries: what the fuck are you talking about?! and similar. On the other hand I did introduce a few words to English. I remember just three at this time: ver, streetful and moonglasses. I could add "green butterflies" too, even if it's not one word.
Thank you for mentioning.I hope that you will still do titles once in while. You will have quality time this way.
Best regards, Karma,
