How did you discover your kink?

[Tedfkats]

I read 'Story of O' in my early 20's.

 

[sweettalk4u]

How did you discover your kink?

Not sure if this counts as a kink or not but for me I started to notice that I found girls wearing chokers more attractive than when they weren't, it took me a while to narrow it down to that being the reason.

I also found my taste in porn gravitated more and more towards girls getting dominated, to girls getting fucked with machines (they were always bound somehow), and then I began to realize my tastes revolved around submissive girls (or girls that become willingly overpowered) that lose themselves to submission and pleasure.

My preferences eventually started to merge into my sex life with binding, toys, choking and use of mj (all consensual).

So I guess for me it's someone giving me complete trust to play with, to choke and to control for the pursuit of pleasure.

So how did you discover your kink?

Began 40 years ago and still discovering it

 

[Jseven82B]

Reading Penthouse Letters when I was young. The idea of people openly sharing their sexuality with others was such a contrast to the all sex is evil I was taught in catholic school. I still want to experience it IRL, yet the idea and stories still get my blood pumping like nothing else

 

[colorfulnayyy]

Reading erotica and play dates.

 

[Dreaming22]

I had a very controlling boyfriend at one point in my life that semi introduced me to it, but it wasn’t until a really good friend of mine showed me a different aspect of it that I found I actually enjoyed it. Then years later after him I met someone I naturally submitted to and it was amazing

 

[SluttyLindsey]

I got caught talking to someone about it and he saw my phone. We used the trust we had already built to try it as I said the only reason not mentioned was I ashamed and didn’t know his reaction. Now I’m his gaping cum slut.

 

[slavemelanie]

Kinks and fetishes normally find you, not the other way around. Usually it happens when you keep an open mind and are willing to explore new things. Most of mine revolve around the power exchange. Though not strictly based to D/s....my kinks can be as subtle as a hand gesture, then all the way to some darker emotionally conflicting acts. Find a partner that is creative and inspires you and your kinks will multiply tenfold. You might even be shocked as to what you find you love.

 

[sinfulchaoticdesires]

It all started with a book... at least I'd like to say that

I should clarify.. I have no interest in the sexual life. I don't get anything from it..
But my kink involves feeling pleasure from giving other people their desires and seeing how they respond to it..
I'm asexually sexual..
Weird combination if im being honest

 

[InterestingOne]

Have a foot fetish/kink, and I remember it vividly. A long time ago, a really hot blonde ex of mine and I were going at it with her on her back and her legs folded back by her head, and I could smell her feet

 

[Bad_Bob42]

When I was a kid, anytime a woman got tied up,(Batgirl, Emma Peel, Lois Lane) I would feel a tingle that I couldn't explain. The fascination was not only seeing a woman bound, but being bound myself. Then around 76-77, as I was entering puberty, I opened up one of my older brother's Penthouse mags and came across a pictorial called "My Funny Valentine" and 2 women engaging in BDSM. That was when I made the connection of bondage and arousal.

 

[DeepAchingNeed]

How did you discover your kink?

Not sure if this counts as a kink or not but for me I started to notice that I found girls wearing chokers more attractive than when they weren't, it took me a while to narrow it down to that being the reason.

I also found my taste in porn gravitated more and more towards girls getting dominated, to girls getting fucked with machines (they were always bound somehow), and then I began to realize my tastes revolved around submissive girls (or girls that become willingly overpowered) that lose themselves to submission and pleasure.

My preferences eventually started to merge into my sex life with binding, toys, choking and use of mj (all consensual).

So I guess for me it's someone giving me complete trust to play with, to choke and to control for the pursuit of pleasure.

So how did you discover your kink?

In my way of living and my approach to ALL things, the most important and revealing truth that you have discovered already is that TRUST. The physicality of things is easy enough to tap into and explore... We may notice ourselves drawn or moved (stirred up) deeply within us, which can easily indicate we ought to try or consider it... from the perspective of that physical awareness, we can rather quickly and easily compile a list of likes and preferences... Though I think that leaves out what is (for me) the most magnificent and profound aspect of all things, especially those that are sensual in nature. OUR CONNECTIONS.
I can "get off" in a million and a half ways (and offer the same to you, for you)... the deep satisfaction and utterly transcendent magic of sensual exploration relies entirely on the relationship and the levels of trust and depth within those connections. It is often what I refer to as the "tether"... that connecting thread that is the entirety of the constructed relationship which shows investment and appreciation and value in and for one another... and in my world, this translates into ALL facets of life. The reality that being of service can hold an unlimited potential for what one would be doing and offering their partner (and the fact that it is, as a matter of fact and truth, a genuine partnership) means that whether it is a kinky moment or the seemingly mundane parts of life, that person that I have selected as MY person knows without any hesitation or doubt how deeply regarded and valued they are by me, and the same is true of them for me. We WORK at the relationship. We recognize that something amazing is being built, and trust our partner completely.
This is the space from which all kinds of exploration and deliverance can arise, and it is fucking golden. As a woman, if/when I have a physical need, and am insistent that another being helps me reach that pinnacle of my physical needs in that moment, it is, practically speaking, a tool which has been engaged for my pleasure and enjoyment. The depth and power of everything that is the integrated existence of my life incorporates mind, AND body, AND spiritual aspects of me. The deepest, most lasting, and genuinely open and engaged things that deliciously linger in me are about the actual connection and relationship that is the priority. The freedom and flexibility that is the unabashed engagement and exploration of any and all things (at least once!) ONLY comes from that foundational commitment and establishment of trust and connection...
I cannot say if it is wisdom, age, a bomb ass bullshit detector, or genuinely having no fucks to give and being who and what I am, in every way, and believing that the innate and profound passions within me would not exist, so I have no fucks to give about being "normal" or "right" or "appropriate" by anyone's standards. As long as me and mine are where we want and need to be for one another, and remain committed and determined to that prioritization and trust- I sincerely have no fucks to give. If it is not founded in a deep and consistent connection and trust, why bother?
Most of us, when/if fully awakened and engaged, recognize that we have so many facets!! I have always believed and operated under the banner which indicates that if you have a desire or passion to try something or even have already done it and know you love it- I want you to have that!! If it is not in my wheelhouse, we'll go to someone whose it is. It is not about ME, it is about US. And my promise and dedication to that US that we have constructed and maintain, is that your full presence and joy is important, and I want the fullness and richness of you as mine. There is nothing we cannot do... or try.
The additional consideration which might prove interesting is the acknowledgement that once you have entered this other dimension in the relationship, the list of things that we may want or think that we need, dramatically and drastically may begin to change. We can see that in the safety, confidence, security, and depth of all that is this supreme relationship, we might actually come to dislike things that we once loved, or may love something we had never considered or tried. The incorporated and integrated experiences which profoundly exceed the physical, open our minds, our hearts, and the doors to all kinds of previous beliefs and/or considerations. When we have that someone, it is a brand new experience and adventure. Once we set aside what we think we know, and are entirely open to the experience and one another - that's magic. (Does this make me a unicorn?! Perhaps. If so, I have learned we are not as illusive as has been told.)
Just as every day is a new day, so is every experience. I am a greedy bitch. Give me ALL of them.

 

[xdresssissytoes]

pornhub opened ny eyes to the pleasures of tribbing, pegging, subbing etc

My lover opened my eyes and fuckhole,,,very wide..with her huge strap-on and fist!!!!

 

[Hardkoch2]

Making my first girlfriend pregnant when I was young.

 

[Mtnmike]

This!! The one time last year, it might have been my last attempt at saving anything, I asked him if he would help me realize a fantasy I've had forever. He heard the word "fantasy," assumed from the start it was something super perverted, and he shut down the conversation right away. And that's when he killed the last bit of love I might have had for him.

Now, if I asked the same thing of my sweetheart, he'd have had me tied down to the bed before I finished getting the question out of my mouth. I like that in a guy. Doesn't argue, he just does it because it would make his partner happy.

I wish partners were always this adventurous. How is it we end up so horribly mismatched? Well, I know how I did. That's a story for a different thread.

Understand, was always called a pervert by her so I shut down year's ago. If they don't want to know don't ask.

 

[eroticspank]

Me too
ES

 

[PaxNurgle]

Understand, was always called a pervert by her so I shut down year's ago. If they don't want to know don't ask.

This is the problem; most of my romantic partners would run away screaming and probably never call me again if I ever broached the topic of them tying me up, spanking me, or bringing even more extreme fetish/BDSM type stuff into our intimate play.

So how DO you bring it up? That is the problem; I don't know. Maybe you don't? Or try to find a partner you already know is kinky? There are some adult dating "Fetish friendly" websites out there, but I've basically given up on the idea of finding a kinky play partner online, as most of those sites have a huge imbalance (like 20-1) of guys to fetish-friendly women, and it's even worse if the guys identify as submissive/bottom.

 

[Crankbait88]

By meeting the right person at the right time in my life. Allowed me to express and explore previously forbidden things. Same goes for her.

 

[wallstreetguy]

I learned a lot from women. when they tell me their kinks, it excites me. I love to please a woman. Hearing her share a fantasy or taboo or kink makes me insta-hard.

 

[PaxNurgle]

Have you gone to a munch in your area?

I did try to find one once. At one time there was a rather close-knit BDSM group here in town; I'm not sure if they are still active or not. I did reach out to them, but they were basically oriented towards male dominants/female submissives, and seemed to be pretty exclusive and tight; not really open to new members. I was also told that as submissive who was male, I wouldn't have really fit in anyway. I've also tried kink dating sites but without much success there either.

 

[Mgwb11]

A cute, flirty online friend of mine would sometimes tell me about how she had several threesomes with some of her guy friends, none of whom were her boyfriend, and how she was really into the thought of getting double penetrated (but had never done it yet). That instantly became one of mine. Just the thought of giving that kind of pleasure, of allowing a girl to be that dirty and slutty, is amazing. And most of my fantasies about it use her as a surrogate, funny that.

 

[emme8]

This is the problem; most of my romantic partners would run away screaming and probably never call me again if I ever broached the topic of them tying me up, spanking me, or bringing even more extreme fetish/BDSM type stuff into our intimate play.

So how DO you bring it up? That is the problem; I don't know. Maybe you don't? Or try to find a partner you already know is kinky? There are some adult dating "Fetish friendly" websites out there, but I've basically given up on the idea of finding a kinky play partner online, as most of those sites have a huge imbalance (like 20-1) of guys to fetish-friendly women, and it's even worse if the guys identify as submissive/bottom.

Start small and mild.
And early in the relationship.

 

[eroticspank]

I started reading Penthouse Forum when I was young. I didn't have any girlfriends so my sex was just fantasies at first. Next, I read a bunch of books, like Lonnie Barbach
ES

 

[emme8]

I recently rewatched the "Return of the Jedi".
Yep, Princess Leia as the slave. I would have been a toddler the first time I saw the movie, but that's where it might have started.

 

[tirp123]

Reading through these posts it is oddly reassuring to hear about so many diverse people (possibly from different cultures) seem to have discovered their kinks in somewhat similar ways. I realized the tingle that it created simply from seeing some types of non-sexual scenes (to others) on magazine covers, or best sellers or movies or even news articles. It did take me some time through my life to realize that not all people perceive the same content the same way. The dots finally connected only when reading the penthouse letters, and realizing that such a tingle is caused by a kink and that there are others out there who feel the same way ! Of course it developed from there and what was the start of the learning is still ongoing.

 

[Wonderer67]

When I was young, seeing movies or tv shows where people were tied up and struggling against their restraints. I didn’t know why then (or now) why this have me erections.

Fast forward to today and I love being restrained and restraining others. It makes me really hard.