my cock is so big...

[MajorMalcontent]

I regularly seekout veteran 40ish porn stars for playmates, because most of them are able, with effort, to accomidate at least the tip.

 

[ohnudeone]

Honest Mom. I was cleaning it and it just went off!!!!

 

[silverwhisper]

apologies for any recent solar flares: i forgot to take my medication yesterday.

ed

 

[midwestyankee]

The Food Network has offered to give it its own show: Creamy Desserts, Yankee Style!

 

[silverwhisper]

that would run right after the special iron cock challenge in which part of me makes a big appearance, incidentally.

ed

 

[midwestyankee]

The Chairman has spoken: today's secret ingredient is........PINEAPPLE JUICE!

 

[silverwhisper]

[sounds the gong of fate]

"fukui-san?"

"yes, ohta, go ahead."

"it appears the challenger's cock is so big..."

"yes, ohta, how big is it?"

"well, i don't know how to say this, fukui-san, but it's so big that we'll have to pull the camera crews out of the studio to get any footage of the challenger's sword!"

ed

 

[midwestyankee]

[sounds the gong of fate]

"fukui-san?"

"yes, ohta, go ahead."

"it appears the challenger's cock is so big..."

"yes, ohta, how big is it?"

"well, i don't know how to say this, fukui-san, but it's so big that we'll have to pull the camera crews out of the studio to get any footage of the challenger's sword!"

ed

Now I am laughing my ass off thinking back to an episode of Iron Chef shown in the last few weeks that featured humongous lobsters. It was hysterical to hear the panelists say that they had never seen one that was so big.

 

[EJFan]

direct from the home office in sioux city, iowa... top ten ways to tell your cock is enormous:

10. john holmes met you when you were 8 and ran away crying.

9. your condoms are formed using a mold taken from the holland tunnel.

8. the governor declared a state of emergency that day your jock strap broke.

7. upon your start in the adult flim business, ron jeremy changes screen name to "wee willy winky"

6. on a trip to california it was mistaken for a sequoia and some dipshit carved a hole in it for cars to drive through.

5. senate proposes bill to convert the space under your foreskin to public housing.

4. you can't shave your pubes because they're protected by rainforest conservation legislation.

3. it was once lampooned by quequeg.

2. ejaculate thought to be at least partly responsible for global warming.

and the number one way to tell if your cock is enormous... eilan NEVER gets pissed off at it when it uses nanas!

 

[TBKahuna123]

One I actually heard in the locker room before a hockey game the other day...

Shit bitch, my cock is so big I don't need a stick. Can jsut skate around out there and smack the puck with the head.

Which prompted my speedy reply: Last time I did that they made the ref measure it to make sure the curve was legal.


I know, I know, what's said in the room stays in the room, but this was too appropriate to pass up!

 

[Eilan]

and the number one way to tell if your cock is enormous... eilan NEVER gets pissed off at it when it uses nanas! nana nana nana

How come those nanas weren't dancing?

 

[bobsgirl]

The Food Network has offered to give it its own show: Creamy Desserts, Yankee Style!

Or as it's commonly known, Good Eats...

 

[TBKahuna123]

The Chairman has spoken: today's secret ingredient is........PINEAPPLE JUICE!

and here I thought you were gonna say cream of sum yung gi.

 

[silverwhisper]

eilan: maybe the nanas were too small to dance? :>

BG:

my cock is so big, the local firehouse has me on retainer to help 'em with particularly tough jobs.

ed

 

[EJFan]

How come those nanas weren't dancing?

you took their colons out... if you took my colon out i'd stop dancing too.

 

[TBKahuna123]

you took their colons out... if you took my colon out i'd stop dancing too.

Eilan's cock is so big it tore the colon out of the dancing nanas?

Which begs the question, why was Eilan ass fucking the dancing nanas?

 

[EJFan]

Eilan's cock is so big it tore the colon out of the dancing nanas?

Which begs the question, why was Eilan ass fucking the dancing nanas?

do i hear a new thread in the offing?

 

[Biosthis]

big dick

its only seen my balls in pictures!

 

[silverwhisper]

...it steadfastly refuses to fall off the front page!
...it would take a beowulf cluster of crays to convert its size into AOL inches!
...i'm still a virgin: nobody will let me near 'em!

ed

 

[TBKahuna123]

...it's featured on next month's cover of Playgirl, Hustler and Better Homes and Gardens.

 

[silverwhisper]

o yeah, well...

...my cock is so big that when it does print adds, it requires its own special fold out section--just for the head!

ed

 

[webbo1]

That the jolly green giant weeps when it enters the room 10 hours before me, with an entourage

 

[Guest]

 

[webbo1]

my cock is so big, all the chicks are in awe.

BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAAAAA HA HA HA HA HA ROTFLMAO


Ok Scalywag I admit defeat...that one is too good

 

[silverwhisper]

...when i sit around the house...so does he!

ed