new poems

[JCSTREET]

wet, blackened frame

don't put two adjectifves befiore a noun Anna

there are times when that can work and our inner eye tells us when

but not this time

I tell you this because your poetry is so delightful--it makes me want to edit you and keep you from your occasional small frailties in the dark of night

keep it spare--you largely do

yo can edit me right back

you can take my shit and rip it apart if you think it has meaning and I'll bend to that

you said something about your apron being full of falling poems and it made me cry

 

[JCSTREET]

\nother 19 posts and i get an avatar

I have instructed my Court photographer to take a beautiful shot of my nose.

 

[jthserra]

thank you Liar...

for your kind comments on my poem Liars in your review....

and thank you JCSTREET for your kind words here also.


jim : )

 

[RazzRajen]

Thank you, min.

I don't know that it deserved an "E"... especially on a day with so many amazing poems. But as I've never had an "E" before, I'll sit quietly and admire it.

Thanks for the mention.

Cordelia

Your words have always held magic and if it's your first E then its long been overdue....

It was a most enjoyable read

Razz



edited for spelling sic!

 

[RazzRajen]

Re poems....Liar

Thanks much for the mention Liar

and I don't melt screens

Just scorch them sometimes when the Hunger strikes.


Razz

 

[tarablackwood22]

@

......come back here , you !!

There's a posse out!

 

[annaswirls]

Hulloh poets. Here be reviews.



Today we start off with annaswirls who just won't shut up. Her Conversation series has now reached #8: river rock, #9: steel desk speak, and #10 : Sauna are all marvels of observation and contemplation.
[color=44aa44]...
I want my mercury rising
through capillary tube, existing
expanding, present,
not liquid crystal representation of
reality plugged in,
disposable
...[/color]
From: Conversation #9: steel desk speak


read, vote, comment and flirt outrageously,
#L

Thank you, um I think.... just won't shut up?

I apologize for posting so many poems, I thought I might be annoying at least one or two people especially now they are in double digits, but it seems all I can do is write right now, there is time for showering and sleep when I am in a block.


T- I have never seen the desk or the wall to be able to take a picture. Real life is sometimes overrated. Stories and pictures were all I had of the wall, the mill, and the desk.

the sauna, yeah, I did sweat my ass off in the ridiculously hot sauna, but no flash photography allowed.


JC- thanks for caring enough to critique my poem. I often put two adjectives before my scattered swirling poems.

grammatical rules purposeful breaking,
believing twist of backwards and too many
catch a view over used, from distorted angle
through warped yellowing glass unusual, new

but if you think it takes away from the message or the flow, then dang, let me go see for myself! I do appreciate your taking the time--

the new poems I posted last night went right from my live journal to here, I fogot to spell check, I am so sorry, some bad ones

AS

 

[Cordelia]

new poems 5/22/04 - part one

Hi folks,

I am back to help the lovely Lauren Hynde with the poetry reviews. She knows I can't say "no" to her.

So, of the first half of today's poems, here are my recommendations.
~~~~~~~

Of the ones I read by JCSTREET today, I really lingered over Sail Sighted. I enjoy reading his poems for the imagery and careful word choice. Bravo.

~~~~~~~

The prolific annaswirls paints three remarkable pictures for us. Read them and just try not to close your eyes and imagine...

leak discovered YMCA 5-20-04

watermelon sundress

necessary still

~~~~~~~

And, speaking of word pictures... don't miss one from one of my favorite poets,WickedEve. Ladybug Egg will move you. I promise.

~~~~~~~

I loved reading the first two stanzas of Voices by RazzRajen. The alliteration of "coruscating... cacaphony... clamoring..." made me read it aloud. Nicely done... (Though I think you should have used alliteration throughout... just an idea).

~~~~~~~

And, finally, my favorite of the day...

Crocuses by jthserra

Tender and wonderful without a drop of cliche in sight. This is how I wish I could write.

~~~~~~~

Have a marvelous weekend.

Read, comment, and vote... but most of all... read.



Cordelia

 

[dreamsweet]

Thanks for the mention, Liar.
dreamsweet

 

[RazzRajen]

Re: new poems 5/22/04 - part one

Hi folks,

I am back to help the lovely Lauren Hynde with the poetry reviews. She knows I can't say "no" to her.

~~~~~~~

I loved reading the first two stanzas of Voices by RazzRajen. The alliteration of "coruscating... cacaphony... clamoring..." made me read it aloud. Nicely done... (Though I think you should have used alliteration throughout... just an idea).

~~~~~~~

Have a marvelous weekend.

Read, comment, and vote... but most of all... read.



Cordelia

Thanks Cordelia for the time taken to review ( and welcome it is to see you back at it)

Razz

 

[WickedEve]

Re: new poems 5/22/04 - part one

And, speaking of word pictures... don't miss one from one of my favorite poets,WickedEve. Ladybug Egg will move you. I promise.

It was the strangest pebble. I actually thought it was a ladybug, at first. Then my youngest handed it to me, and I realized it wasn't. So, I told them it was a ladybug egg, which turned out to be much more fascinating to them.
Thanks Cord for the mention. Care for a ladybug omelet?

 

[jthserra]

Thank you Cordelia...

for the very kind words about my Crocuses. Inspired a bit by Annaswirls' recent Conversations and a bit by reading Franz Wright's "To John Wieners: Elegy & Response" I spent Friday morning in my back yard looking at the spent Easter lillies and thinking of crocuses.

thanks again,

jim : )

 

[Angeline]

Re: Thank you Cordelia...

for the very kind words about my Crocuses. Inspired a bit by Annaswirls' recent Conversations and a bit by reading Franz Wright's "To John Wieners: Elegy & Response" I spent Friday morning in my back yard looking at the spent Easter lillies and thinking of crocuses.

thanks again,

jim : )

I wrote about half a crocus sonnet a few weeks ago. I keep going back and looking at it; then I close the file. This may get me to finish it, lol.

 

[Maria2394]

Maria2394's singularity (in a plural world) is another must-read today. I must admit, though: I really liked the poem, but I truly loved the title. Poetry in itself, Maria.

******

kisses, dear sweet gosling
I didnt know, until this morning, that you mentioned my pseudo rant that particular day, but I do want to thank you now

and, i kinda liked the title too, so double hugs!!

maria

 

[minsue]

Maria2394's singularity (in a plural world) is another must-read today. I must admit, though: I really liked the poem, but I truly loved the title. Poetry in itself, Maria.

******

kisses, dear sweet gosling
I didnt know, until this morning, that you mentioned my pseudo rant that particular day, but I do want to thank you now

and, i kinda liked the title too, so double hugs!!

maria

Sorry, I'm not so good about telling people when I post.

Double hugs and kisses! I've got to do this reviewing thing more often!

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Saturday, 22nd May 2004 - part 2

I'm sorry I didn't post this yesterday, really didn't have the opportunity. Thank you, Cordie, for taking the care of reading and commenting on part of yesterday's New Poems list.

From my half of the list, my personal favourites were:

-------------------------------------------------
big man, small purse
seventeen years
worm moon
best break fast
imperialist
and
close storm post office parking lot
by SeattleRain ©

then a violent change
from flutter to sheet to
pelt of hail
I shrink shoulders in small
inside my cave of steel and glass
white pellets bounce on steaming black top

the clap appears with the flash
who did not have enough time to race out ahead.

SeattleRain (Anna) has given us 6 new poems, of which this 'close storm...' is my favourite, but all of them are incredible. They read as journal entries, intimist and emotional, but extremely well crafted.

-------------------------------------------------
94 to Madison
by flyguy69 ©

The Interstate’s a steel rope
Cars weave from side to side
You peer at your neighbors
Through secret-proof glass
And wonder what’s hidden inside

[...]

This was a first poetry submission by flyguy69, and a very interesting one. There was once a running challenge called Rearview Mirror Theatre, started by lickmyboot, where this poem would fit perfectly. It also reminded me of an R.E.M. song.

-------------------------------------------------
Devil's Bet
Ocean Breeze
and
Nana
by Tathagata ©

[...]

you went to the foot doctor
you went to the eye doctor
and then we sit at Woolworth's
and have hamburgers and fries
and I'd pop a balloon
to see if my banana split would be a penny

[...]

This is an emotional poem, fragmented, and a beautiful tribute. Just one of three offerings by Tathagata, all of them good reads.

-------------------------------------------------
The Church On Queen St In Ottawa
by JCSTREET ©

God’s brooding eye
fire plummets
into the Ottawa, clouds burst like
summer plums, this
sea trident of flame
belly-sky
pregnant with fury

[...]

Finally, a rather dense, complex poem, with some truly impressive imagery and word-play, and probably my favourite of the day.

-------------------------------------------------
Enjoy,

 

[Tathagata]

Re: Saturday, 22nd May 2004 - part 2

This is an emotional poem, fragmented, and a beautiful tribute. Just one of three offerings by Tathagata, all of them good reads.

Thank you Lauren
I appreciate the mention and your kind words

 

[annaswirls]

Thank you Lauren and Cordelia for your kind words and wonderful reviews. Your time and talents are appreciated!

A/S

 

[JCSTREET]

maria's singularity

all works for me, but this

a single-edge sword lies clean
against a wound still shimmering

is the acme of the acme

Carl

 

[Guest]

Sunday, May 23rd Reviews

My poetry-type friends, you've certainly been busy with the 40 fabulous new poems that greeted me this Sunday, May 23. I do believe I am jealous because I'm having difficulty in writing any sort of line let a lone a whole poem.

<~ See, this is me, a froggy emoticon demostrating my poet's envy.




~ ~ ~

Firstly, Maria2394 gives us a perspective of "wild" animals behind steel bars. Stark and real; Maria gives us all something to really think about in A Circle, Interrupted

Squatting for hours, deep in thought
she attempts to ignore the summer sky
is she aware of her spirit slowly dying?

~ ~ ~

annaswirls offers two poems this Sunday, truth is

ignoring echoes from the valley,
heat of distant fires and
mars rising while somewhere a
clock strikes eleven, again

if you pretend I never left
I will never ask you where you have been

also penned was a smooth one, jazz power is a lulling sleepy write, which is a good thing [insert sleepy smile here for emphasis]

of all the
loves, lovers and
alphabetical cheaters, I
only ever really envied jazz

~ ~ ~

WickedEve also brings us two, Pygmalion Gone Mad and Poet's Widows. A must read piece, although, I can't say I know the words, but I do understand the muse behind this haunting surrealistic write.

There are widows in the black woods
and out west--told me Carolina--
widows wrapped in cords,
wooed with words.

~ ~ ~

Dustystar writes Anticipation, a nonerotic with a erotic feel. (Or so I think.)

Bring me a dark rum,
and a light conversation,
And a man that may become more than
Just a friend.

~ ~ ~

Summer is not to far off and Angeline reminds us us of that with Summer Seaside Begins, a poem rich with summer nostalgia.

blue green swells break
to white foam surrendered
in sine waves washed on sand
where scatterlings of clam
shells rest gray striated

~ ~ ~

lostdriver1964 shares with us a backwards first letter of the alphabet poem with Z to A - Back to Silence

~ ~ ~

Liar continues Angeline's summer theme with sand castle flimsies. I enjoyed the word choices and imagery of crashing waves:

ocean
playing toneless symphony
a myriad of micro collisions
as water wears down rock
endlessly

~ ~ ~

wildsweetone submits Relief, a bridal veil removed, reveals secrets.

~ ~ ~

jthserra brings us a wonderful, early bob, with Weave inspired by Paula Becker.

~ ~ ~

pink_tulip presents a sharply writen poem about bottle caps found in for d.b.s

~ ~ ~

tarablackwood22 asks crucial questions about the moon and sea in The Importance of Water

make me look at the ocean
and see its salt,
see the reshaping
of the sand,
the wonders of
a liquid hand.

~ ~ ~

JCSTREET brings us three this Sunday, Susan, Futures, and another piece that implies that he doesn't peek in I Never Looked but I believe the opposite after reading his poem, a delicate, playful image.

~ ~ ~

Tathagata proves he can word blend beauties with poems such as today's submission, Sun Princess. I especially enjoyed the last stanza:

I know you are temporary
I know we are sand mandala's
sacrificed for the good of all
but inside my brain cries
just like a human
at each moment without
your touch

~ ~ ~

RazzRajen explains his Expectations with great phrasing such as this:

Building
expectations is
like a child's building
blocks
Who would remove a piece
let it all tumble down
why would, should they?

~ ~ ~

champange1982 gives an early sample of a wonderfully crafted bob with Weave (an interlocked bob)

Truths caught up in the weaving of it
Unwinding a skein of the strongest thread
Enriching the souls within her care
Her design in each glimmering string.

~ ~ ~

UnclePervey presents us with two far from frigid perverted writes, North Pole Party! and Frosty the Lover!, also two other subimission of Drive-In Show Snack! and One Night Stand!

~ ~ ~

Lastly, steveporter thanks the muses who inspire his poetry in to all my girlfriends

~ ~ ~



That's all the ones that caught my philandering eye today, perhaps others will discover more to their liking on the new poems page. Read them all, comment, and most of all write.

Don't be have poet's envy like me.


- neo
off to find
inspiration before it
finds me...

 

[JCSTREET]

Firstly, Maria2394 gives us a perspective of "wild" animals behind steel bars. Stark and real; Maria gives us all something to really think about in A Circle, Interrupted

Squatting for hours, deep in thought
she attempts to ignore the summer sky
is she aware of her spirit slowly dying?

This poem by Maria is deep and powerful and must cause deep introspection

this theme is explored in a curious way in John Irvine's novel

SETTING FREE THE BEARS

 

[JCSTREET]

This poem by Annaswirls

of all the
loves, lovers and
alphabetical cheaters, I
only ever really envied jazz

makes me laugh BUT

not at her

 

[JCSTREET]

and there is no cure for it

Eve the Wicked who is not wicked stuns with an insightful poem about poets

There are widows in the black woods
and out west--told me Carolina--
widows wrapped in cords,
wooed with words.

reminding me of the ease with which women can be won by words and then spurned

 

[JCSTREET]

lostdriver provides

I hold
gone feelings, earnest desires
crushed before awakening

unconventional treatment of conventional longings

 

[BooMerengue]

Re: and there is no cure for it

Eve the Wicked who is not wicked stuns with an insightful poem about poets

There are widows in the black woods
and out west--told me Carolina--
widows wrapped in cords,
wooed with words.

reminding me of the ease with which women can be won by words and then spurned

whispering gently... "Men are waaaaaaaaaay easier!!"